“You not hungry?” I asked when I noticed he wasn’t touching any of the covered plates.
“Not for food.” This was when the heated gaze came back full force. I swallowed the food as though I was trying to swallow his words and they too didn’t want to go down.
“Keira, I have a proposition for you to consider.”
“Okay…what are you proposing exactly?” I asked feeling that prickling sensation at the back of my neck when you know something is coming and it is screaming danger.
“I will take you to Draven.”
“You will! Oh my God Lucius, that is just…I mean, oh God this can’t be… wait…so does that mean you know where he is?!” I shouted now ignoring the back of my neck altogether. I didn’t care what he wanted from me, if was going to get me to Draven then I would do anything!
“I think I just might but…”
“But what…what do you want in return?” I asked only to wish afterwards I hadn’t been so eager to know, as what he said next made my burger slip from my hands and the food I had already consumed turn to lead.
Just two words…
“One night.”
Chapter 55
Seeing the Moon Light
To say it took me a while to process those two words was an understatement. Upon reflection, then maybe my initial reaction to it was a little over the top. I still remember his face of delighted amusement as I jumped from my seat so quickly it knocked the chair back. At this point I couldn’t even find the words as the shock was still seeping its way into the part of my brain that begged the question…did I just hear that right?
I had just placed my open hands to the table and lowered my head, shaking it slowly as if this would help the understanding process. Needless to say it didn’t and when Lucius stepped closer and placed his hand on mine, I acted like I had been stung. I whipped my hand from his and backed away from him as though I was facing my most dangerous challenge yet…
Temptation.
“Keira…” Lucius purred and I retreated further, nearly falling backwards as I didn’t account for the step the raised dining room was set on. Thankfully I righted myself in time and just as his hand came out to grab me I turned and ran from him. I knew he could have caught me, so I was more than glad when he didn’t try. It was obvious that the pure horror on my face was enough to tell him I needed time alone. And time alone was what I received as I ran to his room and then through into the bathroom where I barricaded myself in, with not only the lock on the door but also throwing a cabinet across the frame for good measure.
And this was where I remained for the rest of the night.
Knocks came and went from so many different people, they all mingled into one. At some point of my solitude I realised this was a strange reaction from me but the underlying reasons were there, as if they had been cut out of me. A shameful reaction to go with the shameful truth…damn temptations of the worst kind! I hated myself for giving it even a single thought of possibility.
I should have shouted and screamed at Lucius for even thinking of such a thing, but I found myself so petrified of giving in to a moment’s weakness, I just had to run. I wanted so badly to be this girl who had faced all these death defying trials and come out on top, come out of it all with the one man I loved. But no-one ever said in these trials would be the lure of a man I had grown to have secret feelings for, if only a very small percentage of what I felt for Draven.
So, with this heartbreaking revelation came my breakdown. Because it wasn’t just Lucius, and the truth of the matter was what I felt for Lucius was the same as what I felt for them all. Vincent and his forbidden kiss. Sigurd and his blood binding bond that fused a small part of his soul with mine. Jared with the bargain we made and the conflicting possessiveness he felt towards me. And then there was Lucius and the last words he had said to me that day…
“That power won’t ever love me back and she was right, power was only ever gained in loving her.”
And so I cried and sobbed and held onto my chest like the hole Draven had left was freezing around the edges. I knew how easy it would have been to say yes, but how hard it would be to live with that answer given. I couldn’t do it, no matter what it promised me in the end.
So this was it, this was what all I had gone through came down to. The biggest test of them all and I didn’t even know if I was making the right decision. Was this really what fate had in store for me? A man I considered a friend, who I always knew wanted so much more than the only thing I could offer him. But now what? Did he really think that he could use this opportunity as a tool to show me how he cared or was this just another game played from an added opponent?
I felt as though I didn’t know anything anymore. Only it felt more than that, it felt as if I was running towards Draven, but without even realising I was on damn treadmill that would always keep me back. I felt that no matter what I did I could never run fast enough!
I don’t know when it happened but at some point I must have exhausted myself because I felt my body being lifted. I knew Lucius had hit his limit on letting me wallow in my misery and in the back of my mind I could only hope this was enough of a sign to take back his deal. I was lowered into his bed, wrapped in his arms and fell back to sleep, hoping that the next day would be a day that answers weren’t needed from questions not asked.
Of course, this was not the day I woke up to, or should I say night as living with Vampires my nights had become my days. I was at least thankful that this time I woke alone. I rubbed my sore eyes from hours of pitiful sobbing and sniffed trying to unblock my nose thanks to wasted energy on breathing through the panic.
I was hit by so many emotions, but I had to say the top two were shame and anger. Both were directed at myself but only one was aimed at Lucius and it was obvious which one. So, whilst I was letting this one overrule over every other one, I took my opportunity to put it to good use. I whipped the covers back and stormed into the sitting room to let rip.
I found Lucius having some sort of meeting with every one of his council and I barely registered the new comers, Liessa and her husband Caspian, before I screamed,
“HOW DARE YOU!” I stood there panting with my fists clenched by my sides, wanting so much to put them to good use. Every head turned to face me, including Percy who was the newest council member. But I cared nothing for the mortified looks I received as I only had vengeful eyes for Lucius.
“My Keira girl, good to see you…”
“Cut the shit Lucius! You and me need words!” I snapped cutting off his bullshit condescending tone. He sighed and then said softly,
“As you wish.” He rose from his seat to face me.
“How could you do this to me? How could you use me like that?” He frowned at my take on his proposition and I circled round the couch to come closer to him. Meanwhile the others all looked round in shock at my freak out.
“Use you?” He asked as though he couldn’t believe he was even asking me this question.
“Then what would you call it?!”
“I…” He found himself stumbling for the right way to answer.
“You! You are using my pain for your gain!” I was losing it as my voice rose to just below a scream. I was shaking with the force of it, knowing that he was using this situation to get his rocks off from a one night stand, which might leave him smiling but leave me broken from guilt for the rest of my life!
“What? No, You…I…” It was the first time I was watching Lucius struggle for words and I realised that all the surprised looks weren’t from witnessing my outburst but from Lucius’ inability to handle it. We both stopped to look at everyone and then both shouted together,
“GET OUT!”
“GET OUT!”
Within seconds the room once again only belonged to us as it had done last night. Only instead of the flight option I opted for then, now I was there to fight. We stood facing each other, both breathing heavy and both trying to hold something back.
“I n
eed to explain.” He finally said in a sharp voice that sounded close to the edge.
“Damn straight!” I said poking at the beast that barely held back a growl.
“The offer I made you last night was…”
“Ridiculous.” I cut in this time making him growl.
“Watch it, little girl.” He warned but I stood my ground.
“Or what Lucius, ‘cause you know you can’t force the issue, that’s not part of the deal!” I snapped being malicious.
“And what do you mean by that exactly?” Oh, he wanted bitch, then he was gonna get a bitch!
“Well, let’s call this what it is and cut the bullshit, the only reason you want me is for some fucked up way of getting back at Draven. But for that you need me willing or what would be the point…?” At this point he really did hit the roof! He roared, losing all his iron control and burst into his demon self. I took a single step back but other than that, I held my ground.
I knew it was a low blow, but it wasn’t one I could have taken back even if I wanted to, which right at that moment I didn’t. This was for the pure plain fact that this was the only reasoning I could have as if it was for anything more, like the fact the bastard cared, then he would never have asked this of me. No-one with half a brain would ask someone they had feelings for to do something that would rip them to shreds later on!
Or at least that is what I thought before seeing Lucius change. His gleaming white horns stood proud at his back and with them the angel’s wings that went from white to yellow, then rust to blood red in the centre of his back. He was like the rising phoenix and as he rolled his shoulders I could see the flash of gold that tipped his impressive horns.
“You should be running, little girl.” He said this in his demonic voice that cut into me as if the claws that grew from his fingers were gouging grooves in my bones. I swallowed down my fear and stood my ground in the face of a demon about to blow.
“I am not afraid of you!” I said and was impressed that I did so without the waver in my voice.
“Then you are even more foolish than I thought minutes ago.” He snarled as he started to advance slowly on me.
“What, when I spoke the truth?”
“A truth you clutch at so desperately to shadow the real reasons behind what is really going on here.” I shook my head but my eyes must have shown him the insecurities of what lay beneath.
“NO!” I screamed but with my outburst came his own as he flipped one of the large couches back as though it was pumped up with air. However, when it went crashing against the far wall and smashing a big hole there, it looked as though that air had been replaced by iron bricks. I jumped but not only at the sounds of destruction but also the speed in which he reached me.
His hands took possession of the top of my arms in a bruising hold and I twisted to try and escape.
“No…no…Lucius…pl…” I pleaded but he lowered his head to mine and whispered over my lips,
“Please.” Then I screamed as he wrapped his arms round me, lifted until my feet no longer touched the ground and ran at the closed window. I turned my head to watch and his name came strangled from my throat as the window exploded outwards. Then he launched us both through it with a twist of his body. I found myself being held to his front with my back to the coming ground and I screamed in sight of my death.
Glass scattered the ground like deadly snow but thankfully there was no one there underneath to receive the brunt of his actions. I closed my eyes and buried my head in his chest having to trust in him not to kill me.
“Please.” There it was, the word whispered again in prayer hoping to break through the damage I had done. I felt his legs hook round mine as the weight of them was pulling me away from him. Now I was trapped to the length of him and I was soon glad of this when I felt his wings start to move. He pulled us both upright, so I opened my eyes again to see us flying off into the night.
I didn’t know where he was taking us, but just as long as it wasn’t at greater heights, so he could do more damage in dropping me, was fine by me. Thankfully, his strong grip on me told me he wasn’t letting me go anywhere and even through our argument I still found comfort being held in his arms.
He didn’t say a word or even steal a look down at me the whole time. It gave me the chance to study the harsh lines of his chiselled face, which at this minute was clearly set in annoyance. Normally his smirking lips were the indication of a playful character set in a granite body but now they were gone and in their place a grim line of resolve.
Only when it became too painful to look at the evidence of what I had done, did I turn away from him. I looked out to the night and saw the orange glow of Munich’s massive city hall coming closer. I bit down on my bottom lip hoping the bite of pain would help control the raging current of my emotions. I didn’t want to hurt Lucius and I knew my words would cut deep but what other option did I have? I wanted to push him away…so, so far away that this bargain would have been the last thing on his mind. What had I really expected? For him to throw Draven’s whereabouts at me like an insult? Did I really think that was going to happen?
My internal questioning stopped as I saw him fly us closer to the rising clock tower. I briefly saw the dark shape of an angelic figure mounted at the very top of the spire we were circling.
“What are we…?” I braved to ask but stopped when his wings suddenly folded inwards making us drop quickly. I let out a little cry as we fell past the bells and then some windows before I felt a thud vibrate through Lucius as his feet hit something.
“Open your eyes, Keira.” Lucius commanded softly and with this I felt him lower me down until my own feet touched a floor. I forced my eyes open and looked up to see Lucius watching me. His features were half shadowed but his eyes blazed with emotions he barely kept unleashed. I could no longer stand it and I raised my hand to caress his cheek. I was only a hairsbreadth away when his hand snatched out to grab my wrist to prevent my touch. I couldn’t deny that it hurt but not in the physical sense.
“Don’t!” One warning was issued by the depth of his hurt. I was about to speak, not really knowing what I would yet say when quickly I was spun away from him. At first I thought it was because he could no longer stand the sight of me, but then I took in the sight in front of me and gasped.
“I brought you here for a reason.” He spoke so gently and if there had been any other sound I would have missed it. But looking out to the beauty before me, I could understand why his voice lowered to such a tender tone. Right in front of us was all of Munich lit up around us and although we were in the thick of the city, up here we couldn’t have been more alone.
“This… is your place?” I forced the words out, barely making it past a whisper.
“Yes.” He answered honestly and I quickly felt like crying again. He had brought me here to his special place and the reasons made me start to shake.
“You know why?” He asked me and at the same time started to rub his hands up and down my arms. I could only nod. What else could I do as I could barely speak for fear of what I would say? A man like Lucius didn’t bring you here to tell you of his revenge plots for a night of sex with his ex-friend’s girlfriend. A man like Lucius didn’t bring you here to boast about his plans of seduction, just because he could. No.
A man like Lucius brought you up here for one thing…
A confession.
“Keira I…”
“Please Lucius…don’t do this.” I begged, my voice close to breaking.
“I have to, my little Keira girl and I will not ask for your forgiveness.” I felt his hands come to rest on my shoulders and he held them there for the longest seconds before finally bringing them to circle my neck. I sucked in a quick breath as I felt him lower his lips to my ear. Suddenly the whole world no longer mattered as I felt, heard and absorbed every word he was about to say,
“I bargained not for one night of your body but for the chance of a lifetime to own your soul.” A single tear fell and th
e hands I had gripping onto the bars slowly let go. I took a needed breath and then let my emotions for this man take over every last thought. I turned in his hold and crushed my lips to his.
In his shock he was frozen, no doubt in the questions begging this to be a dreamless reality. Only when his senses told him so did he react, taking all of me and giving me back everything that was him. His lips took possession in such a way that left me blinded by the intensity of it all. His tongue tasted every last bit of me until it was branding this moment to both our minds’ memory, never to be replaced by another time. This was ours and only ours belonging to no one else in the world, that could touch us up in this fairytale tower.
I had kissed Lucius before but this time it was different. There was no blinding sun, no feeling of revenge or guilt or bitter sweet in knowing what we were doing was wrong. It was just…
Us.
The passion grew to a burning fever that left us clawing at each other’s clothes in hopes of getting skin to skin. I felt my clothes tear and one hand tore the material away from my body as though it was a poison being stripped from my flesh. He pushed me up against the bars that prevented the public from trying anything stupid, like trying to fly without wings and with that thought I could understand the pull. This right here felt like falling under, knowing that if I hit the ground that one last feeling of being free was worth a lifetime of being scared of the heights faced.
So I held on to Lucius and I fell.
Our bodies were so close to entwining in the most sensual way two people ever could. I felt his hands touching my now naked body anywhere he could get and in a frenzied way mine did the same to his suddenly bare skin. It was like we were both lost and with nothing out there to find us we were unstoppable. Spiralling down into the point of no return as all it would now take was for one first thrust and Lucius would be inside me, with nowhere else to go but to finish what he started.
The Quarter Moon (Afterlife saga) Page 64