“Fine,” I said. “But you call me if you feel bad at all, you understand? Well, call the nurse first. But then you call me!”
“Em, you’re getting bossy in your old age,” he said, chuckling. “Night.”
“Night, love you.”
I hung up the phone and leaned back against my chair. I could just make out the first stars in the sky. From the open windows of the house next door, I could hear the quiet sounds of the baseball game on the radio.
“This is nice,” Brooke said, sounding sleepy. “We haven’t done this in a while.”
“Yeah,” I agreed, stretching out. “I’ve missed this.”
We sat like that for an hour or so, not really talking, just listening to the quiet sounds of the woods and the neighborhood as night fell, watching the stars come out above us and drinking cold beer. Eventually, Brooke stood up and stretched.
“I should get going,” she said. “The birdwatchers will be up early for their first day trip, and someone’s got to make the coffee.”
“Have fun,” I told her, yawning. “I’d get up to see you out, but I don’t want to.”
She snorted. “Nice. See you tomorrow. Night, Elliot.”
After she was gone, I became hyper aware of Elliot in the lounger next to me. It was the polar opposite of how I usually felt around him. Normally being with Elliot was as comfortable as taking a warm bath. This feeling wasn’t exactly unpleasant, but it was sure no warm bath.
“I had such a nice day,” he said finally. “Thank you for teaching me how to fish.”
“I had a nice day too,” I said, my voice soft. “I could stay out here forever.”
“Me too. Hey, do you know the constellations up there?”
“Not really,” I said, looking up. I had forgotten how much brighter the stars were out here. Down by Detroit, I was lucky if I could make out the Big Dipper.
“That right there is Orion,” Elliot said softly, pointing up. I followed his finger to a line of three stars. “And if you follow his belt out that way, you can see Sirius.”
I followed his finger, mesmerized by the sound of his voice.
“Beautiful,” I whispered.
“Yes, it is.” I looked over and saw that Elliot was now staring at me, not the stars. I felt that same flipping in my belly. I decided I liked the feeling.
Just then, I yawned hugely. Elliot chuckled. “You’ve been running yourself ragged at the hospital. You should go to bed.”
“Probably.”
He stood up first, reaching down to pull me up from the lounge chair. His hands were strong and steady against mine, and I held on for just a second longer than necessary.
We gathered up the beer cans and went inside. The house was dark, and I didn’t turn on any lights. It felt like I was moving through some kind of dreamy fog, and I didn’t really want to disturb it just yet. In silence, we headed up the stairs. Elliot had been sleeping in the guest bedroom at the end of the hall, but he stopped when I reached my door. A tiny sliver of light shone through from the open door behind us, hitting him directly across the face so I could make out his eyes in the darkness.
“Good night, Elliot,” I whispered.
“Good night.” He leaned forward and kissed my cheek, and I closed my eyes, overwhelmed by the nearness of him. He smelled like beer and the lake and a little bit of sweat. I know it doesn’t sound good, but let me tell you, it was very appealing and all Elliot. Before I could even think about what I was doing, I turned my face so his lips landed on my mouth. And then we were kissing.
I don’t think I’d ever been kissed like that before. Elliot’s mouth was hard against mine, as if he was determined to drink in every inch of my lips. I heard him release a little sigh of air, a happy, almost relieved sound that sent a thrill straight into my heart. I kissed him back, as hard as I could, until I was breathless.
Everything that had ever been missing from any of my past kisses was there with Elliot—sparks, heat, maybe even fireworks. Nothing with Greg had ever been—
Suddenly, I pulled away. “I can’t,” I gasped. “I’m sorry. Greg—”
Elliot’s face immediately closed up. “I’m sorry,” he said stiffly.
“No,” I reached for his hand. “Don’t be. I just…I can’t. Not yet.”
He pulled his hand away from mine and, without another word, walked down the hallway, shutting the door to his room behind him.
Chapter Twenty-nine
“You did what?” Brooke asked, her voice incredulous. “Wait a second, go back. You kissed him?”
“Yup,” I said, smiling against my coffee mug. “And it was amazing.”
“Holy shit,” she said, staring at me across the little table at the inn. “I didn’t think you had it in you. So what happened next?”
I frowned a little bit as I thought of what followed. “Well, I realized that I hadn’t exactly totally ended things with Greg, and I told him I couldn’t.”
“Wow,” Brooke said, her wide eyes. “Way to kill the mood.”
I sighed. “I know. And I was too flustered from the kiss to really explain myself. So, you know, I’m gonna need to take care of that ASAP.”
“You didn’t see him this morning?”
“He left a note that he went hiking. He was gone when I woke up.”
“He’s pissed,” she said shrewdly.
“Probably,” I agreed. “But I’m hoping he’ll get over it when I throw myself at him later.”
I had expected Brooke to laugh at that, but she just frowned slightly. “What?” I asked.
“I just…listen, don’t get me wrong, okay? I really like Elliot. I just don’t want you to rush anything. There’s a lot going on in your life.”
“Yeah, but—”
“Just think about it. There’s all this stress about your dad, right? And you’re just ending this really intense relationship. Plus there’s the whole clinic purchase plan when you get home. It’s a lot.”
“I know,” I said. “But Elliot is the one guy who actually supports me in all of that. I can’t think of anyone better to have by my side.”
“Just take it slow, that’s all I’m saying.”
I felt a little peeved, to be honest. I was more excited about what had happened last night than I had ever been about any guy. Until last night, I had never really understood what I was missing. I didn’t really appreciate Brooke being a buzz kill.
“Well, regardless,” I said. “I need to get on the phone with Greg and tell him nothing is going to change. It’s done.”
“Have fun with that,” she said in a better-you-than-me tone.
Greg did not take the news very well. He had called me a few times since I had been home, but I refused to talk to him, telling him my dad was my only priority. Now he tried to convince me that I was speaking irrationally because I was upset about the heart attack.
“Greg,” I said, as patiently as possible. “I’m telling you the truth. It is over. I’m not the one for you. I know that now. Nothing is going to change my mind.”
“I just can’t believe this,” he sighed, but he sounded more resigned. I felt a little flicker of hope that this might be over soon. “I don’t understand what I did wrong.”
“It wasn’t your fault,” I said. “I was trying to be something I’m not because it’s what you wanted.”
Greg was quiet for a long moment. “Listen,” I said. “I’m going to take those clothes back and send you the money. The ones I wore already, well, maybe I can sell them on eBay.”
“Don’t be silly,” he said, the hint of disapproval back in his voice. “That would be totally inappropriate.”
I sighed to myself, more sure than ever that I was doing the right thing.
“I’m sorry, Greg,” I said, once more. “I truly am.”
“I’m sorry too,” he said, his voice sad. “I think I could have been really happy with you.”
Maybe, I thought after I hung up, but I would have never been happy with you.
&nbs
p; As I slipped my purse into my bag, I couldn’t help but feel my spirits lift a little. That was out of the way now. And when Elliot came back, I could tell him.
* * *
But Elliot didn’t come back, not all day. He wasn’t at the house when I left for the hospital, or when I called home a few hours later. And he still wasn’t there when I came home at lunch. I went back to the hospital and ate dinner with my dad, hanging out to watch the ball game, checking my phone every five minutes. What if something had happened to him?
When I got home, and Elliot still wasn’t there, I started to panic. He didn’t know this area. What if he fell and hurt himself somewhere out in the woods. I shivered a little, thinking of the wild animals one might encounter out there at night hurt.
I pulled out my cell and called him one last time, startled when I heard the ringing of his phone from the back deck. It had been there since last night, probably. Which meant he was out there somewhere with no way to communicate. I walked outside to get the phone and happened to glance down at the screen. Five missed calls. Four were from me. One was from Heather.
There is this girl, actually…
Oh my God, how stupid could I possibly be? Elliot had told me there was a girl he was seeing from his club. What if I had misinterpreted everything? What if he had been upset, not because I pulled away, but because he was offended I would come on to him when he had a girlfriend.
He kissed me back, a voice in my head shouted defiantly.
Yeah, but he had also had quite a bit to drink. I closed my eyes. God, was he out there right now thinking I was a drunken, sleazy girl who would throw herself at a guy who was just trying to be a friend? The thought made my stomach clench with dismay.
My phone rang in my hand and I hurriedly held it up to my ear, thinking it might be him.
“So what’s this I hear about you kissing Elliot?” Ashley sounded gob smacked.
“Who told you that?”
“Brooke told Chris,” she said hurriedly. “What does it matter. Is it true?”
“Yes,” I said, slumping into a kitchen chair. “And I think I screwed everything up.”
“Em, it is way too soon for that,” she said. “I know it’s been a while since you had a serious relationship like Greg, but you don’t want to just bounce around to the next guy. Especially when he’s a friend.”
Somewhere deep inside, her words set off a little flame. Was she seriously going to lecture me about dating right now? After everything that happened, did she still think that I needed her to be my romance guru?
“Actually, you’re wrong,” I said, my voice steady. “Elliot is different. The way I feel is different.” As I said the words, I knew they were true. With Elliot, I never worried about anything—not about how I looked, or how I should act, or what he was thinking. He accepted me, he always had. Sure, we argued about stupid stuff, but I also felt comfortable enough with him to argue. Comfortable enough to make him mad and let him tease me.
In one crystal clear moment, I got it. Elliot saw me for what I really was. And I’d be damned if I let go of that so easily.
On the other end of the phone, Ashley was still talking, apparently oblivious to my breakthrough. “Come on, Em,” she said. “Don’t you think it’s really soon to—”
“No, you know what I think?” I interrupted, standing up suddenly. I was fed up—like, really, really fed up. “I think I’m sick and tired of taking advice from everyone else about my life.”
“Emily—”
“No, Ashley, I’m done. I’m done having people think I need to be taught or changed or exposed to things in order to be happy. I’m making my own decisions now, okay? You can go ahead and tell Ryan that, and tell Chris he can call Brooke up and tell her too.”
On the other end of the line, Ashley was silent, but I could hear Chris in the background, and what sounded like clapping. “Good for you, Em!” he called.
“Now, Ashley, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go find Elliot and tell him how I feel.”
“Okay,” she squeaked, sounding a little scared.
“Thank you for caring, Ash,” I said, not wanting her to think I was mad. “I love you. And I’m telling you with love—butt out.”
I hung up the phone and grabbed my purse, determined to set out in the truck until I found him. I pulled out my keys and spun around—and stopped dead in my tracks.
“You need to tell me how you feel, huh?” Elliot asked. He was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, a little grin on his face. “And just how would that be, Emily?”
I took a deep breath, wanting to tell him, wanting to ask him to break up with Heather and tell him that I had broken up with Greg. But instead, I launched myself into his arms, kissing him on the mouth before he could say a word.
I was relieved to find that the kiss was every bit as good as the one the night before. A part of me had been scared that it had just been a spell of the moonlight and the beer. But as Elliot kissed me back, I knew that it was not. It was definitely, definitely not. He really was that good of a kisser.
“What did you want to tell me?” he said breathlessly, pulling back. “Come on, I want to hear you say it.”
“I broke up with Greg,” I said quickly. “Like, officially. That’s why I had to stop last night. I wanted it to be right first.”
He smiled, and kissed me softly. “God, you have no idea how glad I am to hear that. I really, really hated that guy.”
I laughed. “You never even met him!”
“It doesn’t matter,” Elliot said firmly.
“So, what about you?” I asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Did you break up with that girl, that Heather?” I wrinkled my nose a little, hating the thought of the unknown girl. Elliot laughed.
“That ended ages ago. It wasn’t very fair to her, you know. To date her when I was so head over heels for you.”
“You were?” I asked, delighted.
“Of course,” he looked at me levelly. “I always have been, Em.”
“I’m sorry it took me so long.”
He leaned in for another kiss, smiling that Elliot smile I knew so well. “I think I can forgive you.”
After a moment, he pulled back again. I was almost relieved—my head was spinning and I was out of breath. If I would have known kissing Elliot would have been like this, I would have done it a long time ago.
“So,” he said, looking down at me with a twinkle of amusement in his eyes. “What guy am I?”
“What guy?” I asked, confused.
“You know. From your research. I know I’m not the high school sweetheart or the boy next door. So what is it? The guy with hidden depths? The bad boy?” He wiggled his eyebrows at me suggestively at that, making me laugh.
“Nope,” I said, wrapping my hands more tightly behind his neck. “You’re not any of those things. You, Elliot, are the guy I met in a totally normal, natural, every-day kind of way. You’re the guy I took my time getting to know and becoming friends with. And you’re the guy I fell totally and completely in love with without even realizing it.”
“Hmm,” he said in a mock-serious tone—the grin on his face kind of gave him away though. “I’m not sure if that’s romantic enough for your friends.”
I kissed him again before pulling back and grinning at him. “Somehow, I really don’t care one little bit.”
We stood in silence for a moment, just holding each other. Finally, Elliot bent his head toward me once again. “Hey, Emily,” he whispered in my ear, kissing my neck lightly and making me shiver. I could practically hear the smile in his voice. “Does this mean you’re going to join the Adventurers Club?”
I laughed and pulled him closer. “Don’t press your luck, buddy.”
Chapter Thirty
“Emily, let’s go!”
“Hang on a second,” I yelled back, leaning in toward the mirror to check my mascara. Somehow I still never quite managed the secret technique of getting it clump free. S
atisfied that I looked somewhat decent, I stood up from my dressing mirror and headed to the living room.
“It’s about time,” Brooke grumbled from the couch, looking up from her magazine as I entered the room.
“What’s your big hurry?” I asked, picking up my purse. “We’re just going to dinner.”
“Yeah, your celebration dinner,” she said, throwing the magazine aside and standing. “This is a big deal.”
I rolled my eyes and she smirked. “You weren’t this blasé a few hours ago. In fact, I think I remember someone begging me to pull off the road so she could throw up.”
“Shut up,” I said, walking to the door. “I was allowed to be nervous then. But this is supposed to be the nice relaxing part.” Brooke followed me through the door, waiting while I stopped to lock it behind us.
“So are Ashley and Chris meeting us at the restaurant?”
“I think that’s the plan.” We headed down the stairs to the parking lot and climbed into my car.
“We’ll be late,” Brooke muttered, looking at the dashboard clock.
“Relax,” I told her. “The restaurant is like, five minutes away.”
She didn’t answer, just stared determinedly out the window. After a moment, I saw her jump slightly. “Crap,” she muttered, reaching for her bag. “I left my phone at the clinic this afternoon.”
I looked over at her. There was something weird about her voice, like it was almost too casual. “No, problem,” I said, signaling to turn. “We can stop by on the way.”
“Sorry,” she said, still not looking at me. “I don’t want to make you late for your dinner.”
As we neared the clinic, Brooke seemed to get increasingly anxious. She tapped her foot against the floorboard and crossed her arms, glancing at the clock over and over again.
“Okay, Brooke,” I said as I turned into the parking lot of the clinic. “What’s going on? You’re acting all weird.”
“I am not,” she said, her voice high pitched. “I’m fine! Everything’s fine.”
I parked the car and turned to her, but she was already swinging her door open and hopping out. “Come on,” she called over her shoulder.
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