Roger Mantis

by Tom Alan Brosz

  Then Roger turned in the direction of town. There was another animal coming toward him. This one was bigger than a squirrel but smaller than a deer, running fast. Roger recognized it immediately.

  “Lou!” shouted Roger. “Lou!”

  Lou bounded into the clearing and up to Roger, running around him in a couple of tight circles before sitting down in front of him. The dog dropped what he was carrying and barked, just once. Roger was so happy that Lou had followed him that he laughed out loud, and then laughed again at how weird his laugh sounded.

  “Mom or Dad must have let you out,” said Roger. “How did you find me?”

  Lou sat and looked at him, as though it was obvious that he was one of those cool dogs who could find his master anywhere and wouldn’t even stop to chase that squirrel on the way. Of course, Lou was too lazy to chase squirrels much anyway.

  Roger reached out automatically to pet Lou and then realized again that he was reaching out with a spiky, vicious-looking foreclaw. Then he looked down at what Lou had carried into the woods.

  It was the old, beat-up baseball that Roger and Lou used when Roger practiced his field throwing out on the vacant lot. Roger would throw it to an imaginary baseman, and Lou would run and bring it back. Everything came crashing back into Roger’s head again.

  But maybe … Roger fumbled with the baseball, finally managing to get the long finger thing at the end of his claw wrapped around it like he had the doorknob. But when he lifted it and tried to toss it for Lou, it got snagged in his finger somehow and just fell to the ground a few feet away.

  “Sorry, Lou, old pal,” said Roger, his antennae drooping. “Afraid I’m not much of a ballplayer anymore.” He raised his spiny arms and hands and shrugged. At least he could still shrug.

  Lou went over and picked the ball up anyway, dropped it in front of Roger, and then sat back proudly, no different than if he’d returned it from clear across the field.

  Roger had to smile. Even though it didn’t feel like his mouth was doing anything like smiling, he could feel it inside. He started thinking again, a bit more calmly. What should he do? Where should he go?

  Roger had seen lots of old movies on TV about what happened to monsters on the loose; even those misunderstood ones that weren’t actually running around trying to kill everybody. He didn’t think anybody in Highland Falls had pitchforks except maybe some of the farmers, and he was sure nobody had flaming torches, but he knew that a lot of people in town had shotguns.

  Should he go back to his house? He imagined walking right in on his unsuspecting parents as a giant mantis. His dad had been a Navy Corpsman with the Marines and probably wouldn’t even need a shotgun if he mistook Roger for a monster!

  He looked at Lou again. “I don’t suppose you can run back and break it gently to Mom and Dad that their kid has turned into a giant bug.”

  Lou tilted his head and scratched behind one ear. He wasn’t that cool of a dog. Then Lou’s ears lifted as he turned his head back toward the edge of the woods.

  Roger looked too and listened. The vacant lot was some distance away, hidden beyond thick trees, and even with his new vision, he couldn’t see anything, but he could hear people talking loudly in that direction. He couldn’t make out the words, but he recognized the voices of his friends … Jerry and Marlene!

  What would Jerry and Marlene do if they saw him like this? Jerry was pretty cool about almost everything, and Marlene was really smart. Both of them were okay with bugs and had liked his pet mantis, but that had been a normal-sized mantis. Roger got up and started backing around the maple tree, getting ready to run further into the woods. Then he stopped.

  Roger needed help, and right this minute Jerry and Marlene might be his best bet. Maybe his only bet. Besides, even if they freaked out when they saw him, at least neither of them had military training or shotguns, although Marlene did pack a nasty kick, even in sneakers.

  “Hey, Jerry! Marlene! Over here!” shouted Roger. His shout wasn’t as loud as he’d hoped, and it was very buzzy. They probably hadn’t heard him, and if they did, would they even know it was him? Then Lou started barking and running back toward the vacant lot, the ball forgotten. When Lou disappeared behind the trees, Roger followed his shape with his eyes until he couldn’t make it out anymore.

  The sound of Lou’s barking began getting closer again. The voices followed him too. “Good dog, Lou,” Roger said quietly to himself. “I guess you’re just cool enough.”

  Then Roger started getting nervous again. If they spot me as soon as they come into the clearing, he thought, they’ll probably go nuts and take off without even knowing who I am! They won’t stop running until they get to the other side of town. Jeez, maybe they’ll bring back people with shotguns!

  Roger frantically looked around, his head whirling in all directions, and spotted a thick clump of bushes at the clearing’s edge opposite the path to the vacant lot. He ran over and found a spot behind the bushes where he could still see through a gap in the leaves, ducked down, and waited. The voices got closer. Roger found himself scraping his spined, bony forearms together in agitation. They made a very weird noise, and he quickly stopped. Peering through the bushes, he watched Jerry and Marlene as they came into the clearing. They were each carrying their own baseball gloves, and Lou bounded eagerly around them both.

  “Aw, come on,” said Jerry. “A barking dog running off, then stopping to see if you’re coming? Not following a dog like that’s practically illegal!” Jerry Martinez was Roger’s best friend. He was the same age as Roger, with messy black hair, brown skin, and an almost permanent grin. Jerry usually sounded like he was telling the world’s funniest joke, no matter what he was saying, and was exactly the person you’d want if you had to tell somebody their house had burned down while they were away. It would almost sound like good news.

  “I still think it would make more sense to just wait at the lot,” said Marlene. “Roger will probably show up eventually.” Marlene Olsen was a year younger than Roger and Jerry but in the same grade as them. Marlene was pretty decent for a girl, and the three of them hung out together all the time, not just when they played baseball. She had neat brown hair and sharp blue eyes with perfect vision, but the way she talked, especially when she was explaining something—she usually sounded like she was explaining something, even when she wasn’t—Roger could imagine her wearing horn-rimmed glasses so strongly he could almost see them on her face.

  “Hello?” Roger called out from behind the bushes. “It’s me, Roger.”

  “Roger?” asked Marlene. She stood by the big maple tree looking around. “Where are you? And what’s with your voice? You sound like Mrs. Clancy.”

  “Yeah, I know,” said Roger. “Something really weird happened to me. I didn’t want to scare anyone.”

  “Weird?” said Jerry. “That I’ve gotta see. You never do weird. You’re about a mile past the far side of normal.”

  Both Jerry and Marlene looked toward the bush where Roger was hiding. Maybe because they’d figured out where Roger’s voice was coming from. Or maybe because Lou had run to one side of Roger’s bush and now sat looking at Roger and panting happily.

  It was now or never. Roger had to just come out with it. They would either accept him, or they wouldn’t.

  “I … I’ve been turned into a giant praying mantis,” he said.

  Jerry and Marlene looked at each other. Marlene looked back at the bush, and her eyes narrowed. “Yeah, right,” she said. “Did you and Jerry cook this up? I came here to play ball. We’ve got a team practice tomorrow.”

  “No, really. I’m a giant insect.” Roger thought that he sounded stupider every time he said it. There was really no other way around it. He slowly stood.

  “Aaack!” said Marlene, jumping backwards and dropping her glove.

  “No, wait!” said Roger. “It’s just me!” He waved his spiky forearms frantically, then realized this probably looked even worse, so folded them i
n front of him and ducked his head to look as harmless as a gigantic carnivorous insect possibly could. He slowly walked out from behind the bush and stood still. Marlene and Jerry backed away a bit, just as slowly, their eyes wide and mouths hanging open. Lou picked up his ball and started eagerly running back and forth between Roger and his friends.

  “R-Roger?” said Marlene. “Is that really you?”

  “Yeah,” said Roger. “Yeah. It’s really me. I’m kinda having a hard time with it myself.”

  Marlene looked incredulously over to Jerry. “This isn’t one of your jokes, is it.” It wasn’t a question.

  Jerry’s eyes were still very round, but he didn’t look as scared now. “Man, I wish! I’d be bragging on this one until I was a hundred years old!”

  “Jeez! Give me a break!” said Roger. “Does this look like a joke?”

  “That’s Roger all right,” said Marlene. “And look, Lou thinks so too.”

  Jerry walked slowly toward Roger, looked him up and down, and his usual smile broke out. “Whoa, Roger,” he said. “This is probably the coolest thing I’ve seen in years! Did you take a secret formula? Get bitten by a radioactive mantis?”

  “I just woke up this way,” said Roger. “I have no idea why. And ‘cool’? You can have it! This stinks!”

  “Maybe there’s some bug going around,” said Jerry.

  “Yech,” said Roger and Marlene together.

  Marlene frowned. She came up next to Jerry and then walked right around Roger, looking him up and down. Then she stood in front of Roger and folded her arms.

  “This is impossible,” she said. “An insect as big as you can’t exist. It couldn’t hold itself up, or breathe, or a lot of other things.”

  “Well, sorry,” said Roger, who stubbornly continued to exist as a giant mantis.

  “How do you feel?” asked Marlene, sounding more concerned now.

  “Um … Pretty good, actually.” Roger had been so frazzled that he didn’t realize this until he’d said it. “Nothing hurts. Maybe a little hungry.”

  Both Jerry and Marlene stopped smiling and backed up a little bit again.

  “Come on. Seriously?” said Roger.

  “Real mantises mostly eat live insects,” said Marlene warily. “I don’t know what a giant mantis would eat. Something bigger.”

  “Hey, he hasn’t eaten Lou yet,” said Jerry. “That’s a good sign.”

  “I used to feed my pet mantis crickets,” said Roger. “I had to go out and catch them.”

  “Should we start catching crickets?” asked Jerry.

  “Blech!” said Roger. Crickets didn’t sound any more appetizing now than when he’d been human. “Enough, already. Look, you guys need to help me out. I have to tell my mom and dad about this, and I don’t know how.”

  “Want us to go get them?” said Marlene.

  “No, I want to go back to my house. Somebody’s going to see me out here sooner or later.”

  “We’ll go back and tell them what happened before you come in,” said Jerry. “That way they won’t go all psycho or something.”

  “Oh, right,” Marlene told Jerry. “Roger’s parents are going to buy you, Jerry Martinez, telling them their son is a giant insect?”

  “Yeah, good point,” said Jerry. “But you’ll be there. You can back me up, can’t you? You could … oh, wait! I’ve got a better idea. I’ll be right back!” Jerry started back down the path toward the town.

  “Hang on,” yelled Marlene. “I’ll come with you.”

  Probably afraid I’d eat her if she stays here, thought Roger. Marlene hadn’t even bothered to pick up her glove. He watched them both disappear down the path and then lay back down again next to the old maple tree. Lou came over, dropped his ball, circled around a few times, and then curled up next to him.

  Roger’s friends seemed to be fairly cool with what happened, but a little sliver of doubt arose in his mind. Were they really going to find some way to help him, or were they going for the police or something?

  Roger shook it off. No. Jerry and Marlene wouldn’t do that in a million years. He settled down to wait, heaving a deep sigh, which whistled in and out of the holes on his abdomen. He still couldn’t remember what those darn holes were called. He probably should have asked Marlene before she left.

  While he waited, Roger tried to pick up Lou’s old baseball again and actually give it a decent throw. Lou ran back and forth, waiting. Roger flubbed a few tosses, which Lou eagerly returned. Finally, Roger worked out a sort of snapping motion with his claw that got his finger out of the way, and the ball made it to the edge of the clearing. Pathetic for a first baseman, thought Roger dejectedly. But … not bad for a bug, I guess.

  Roger made a few more throws, one of which made it into the woods. Not one ball went where Roger was aiming. After minutes of searching, Lou finally found the ball in the woods and was trotting back with it when his ears perked up. He turned his head toward the path. Roger heard his friends coming back, and then Jerry and Marlene ran into the clearing. Jerry was waving something over his head.

  “I got my dad’s instant camera,” said Jerry. “An SX-70! I’ll take a picture of you and show it to your folks! Nobody can fake an instant photo!”

  “That might work,” said Roger. While his parents were pretty hard to freak out, this might be a special case, and he didn’t think a picture would be quite as scary for his parents as him showing up in the living room unexpectedly.

  “Okay,” said Marlene. “I’ll stand next to Roger for the picture; otherwise they might think it’s just a close-up shot of a regular mantis.”

  “Oooh, good thinking,” said Jerry. “That’s just the sort of gag I’d pull.”

  “Stand by the tree, Roger,” said Marlene. “Look, well, as non-carnivorous as possible.”

  “I’ll do my best,” said Roger. Marlene stood next to Roger, still not too closely, and Jerry raised the camera.

  “Hey, Marlene,” said Jerry. “Make bunny ears behind his head!”

  “Shut up, Martinez,” said Marlene, “and take the picture.”

  “Yeah, never mind,” said Jerry. “He’s already got two antennas up there anyway.” Jerry took two shots, grabbing the photos as they spit out the front of the camera. Then they all crowded in together to watch the images slowly appear.

  “Shake them,” said Roger.

  “Does that really make any difference?” said Marlene. “I just like to watch the pictures show up.”

  “I don’t know,” said Jerry. “But it’s boring just standing and looking at it.” He took one of the photos and started to shake it. “Let’s see which one develops first.”

  Roger looked at his friends on either side of him and realized that neither one seemed nervous now about being right next to a giant mantis. The relief he felt made him realize how scared he’d been before he knew what they were going to do.

  They looked at the photos. “I’d call it a tie,” said Roger.

  “Yeah, whatever,” said Jerry. “These’ll work.”

  “We’ll head down to your house now,” said Marlene. “Wait here till we get back. Hide in that bush again if anyone else comes by. Wish us luck!”

  “Boy, do I,” said Roger, getting nervous again as he watched them leave. This time Lou went with them, probably getting bored of playing ball with a giant bug who threw like a first grader.

  Chapter Three

  After what seemed like hours, Jerry, Marlene, and Lou joined Roger again near the old maple tree.

  “How’d it go?” asked Roger. He began nervously scraping his forearms together again, caught himself, and pulled his arms back to their quiet, folded position.

  Jerry shrugged. “Could’ve been better. Could’ve been worse.”

  “The pictures impressed them,” said Marlene, “but I think your parents still wonder if it’s some kind of trick. I think your dad in particular was looking for wires or zippers.”

  Jerry
grinned. “It’s actually kind of a compliment. I would’ve had to build a full-sized model mantis to pull that trick off.”

  “Yeah, but it’s exactly the kind of thing you’d do if you had a mind to,” said Roger. “Remember when you snuck into that shed and reworked that whole float for the homecoming parade?”

  “Oh, yeah,” said Jerry. “Good times. The senior class practically went around the rest of the year with bags over their heads.”

  “You’ll be lucky if they ever let you into high school,” said Marlene. “Anyway,” she said, turning to Roger. “You’re just going to have to go down there. They’re as ‘prepared’ as they’ll ever be, short of showing them a movie of you. And nobody we know has a movie camera.”

  “What if somebody sees me?”

  “Your house is the only one that close to the vacant lot,” said Marlene, “and you can really only see the lot from your upstairs windows. If we just hurry, it’ll be fine.” Roger relaxed a little. He was glad Marlene was there. She always made so much sense.

  All the way back, Roger wondered what his parents would say and what they might do. The first test of his resolve was when he had to get back over the fence at the edge of the woods. He got one leg stuck in the fence rails this time, and Jerry and Marlene got in each other’s way trying to get him loose. Roger got more and more nervous waiting for somebody to spot him out in the open before he could even get home.

  They finally managed the fence, quickly crossed the vacant lot and Roger’s backyard, and stopped at his back door. “They were in the living room before,” said Marlene.

  “I’ll wait in the kitchen,” said Roger. “Just go on in first and talk to them again. When you tell me it’s okay, I’ll come in there.” And if it’s not okay, he thought grimly, I’ll light out for the woods again. And maybe just keep on going until I hit the state wilderness.

  Roger waited anxiously in the kitchen with Lou while Jerry and Marlene went into the living room to talk to his parents. His mother must have been waiting on Roger to eat breakfast. There were pans of bacon and sausage on the stove, with the burner turned way down, and eggs waiting to be broken. He couldn’t hear everything they were saying in the living room, but he could catch most of it, particularly from his parents, who must have been facing the kitchen.