by Rayna Stone
Okay, now they were laughing. And Alexa was soaring toward beyond pissed. “The cages.” Seriously, it did bear repeating. She didn’t know if it was the tone of her voice, or the expression of outrage on her face, but they sobered up immediately.
“What about the cages, angel,” James said. He practically growled the words.
“I will never be put in a fucking cage again. I would hide, James. I would crawl under the stairs and curl up for hours. I made a bed in my closet with pillows and blankets, and I’d stay there all night listening to the fighting, praying that if I was quiet and hidden my mother would leave me the fuck alone. I will never hide away again. I won’t wait in a cage to see if I get yelled at, to wonder if I’ve been good enough for you to fucking feed me. It was my safe place and it was wrong. I don’t care if it’s fun for others, if it’s safe for others, it’s hell for me and I’m not going to be with anyone who wants to put me back in my goddamned closet.”
Alexa’s voice had steadily risen, and now she was shouting. Her hands were shaking so bad she had to grip the chair to settle them, and she was breathing so hard that the sound was almost deafening. She’d never told anyone about that before and she was unprepared for the depth of pain she felt as the memories washed over her. Knowing how much her own parents hated her. How much of a failure she’d been to them. Knowing that her own mother didn’t just wish she had never been born, she was willing to take her out of this world because she despised her so much.
The worst part of that pain was knowing that for the first time, someone valued her and wanted her. She’d finally known what it felt like to be held, and she’d failed again. She wasn’t what they wanted so they would take that precious feeling away from her.
Chapter Fifteen
Ryan felt sick to his stomach. He knew it was bad, he just hadn’t realized the extent, or that he would feel so much anger. He would not even let his mind try to conjure an image of their angel as a child, curled up in blankets on a fucking closet floor. It wasn’t where she belonged. Ever. How she had not only become so successful, but so strong, baffled him. If he had lived that life, he didn’t know how he would find the strength to make his way in the world. She’d never had anyone. How did she do it? How did she know how to not only survive, but make sure that she had what she’d need to stand on her own two feet as an adult? Jesus, he was proud of her. And they needed to straighten her out right now.
Every submissive was different. Ryan had never been in a cage and would never be put in one either. He’d been on his knees and ignored before, but there was nothing wrong with Alexa if she didn’t find security in that. She sure as fuck had her reasons. There were no hard and fast rules. If their angel needed affection from them, they were going to smother her with it.
Ryan couldn’t take the distance a moment longer. He stood up and walked over to Alexa as he held out his hand. She looked so defeated, but she wasn’t running away and didn’t hesitate to take his hand. He gave her a smile to let her know how much that gesture meant.
Ryan walked her back over to the couch where James was waiting and cuddled her onto his lap. James grabbed her legs and shifted her so that she was lying on both of them. Pressing his face into the back of her neck, Ryan let James take the lead and sent up a silent prayer of thanks that James would be able to ease her and make her understand. That was what James was good at. Ryan would be the one to play with her, to coddle and comfort her, but James was the security in this relationship and he was the strength. She needed that right now, so Ryan would just hold her and let her lean on him.
James took a deep breath and locked his eyes with Alexa’s. “Honey, I want you to think for a minute for me. In the time you’ve known us, have you ever seen Ryan kneel for me?” He waited patiently until she shook her head no.
“Has he ever called me Sir or Master?” Again she shook her head. “Have I treated him like he was anything but the most important person in my life?” No, again.
“Okay. So let me explain how our relationship works. I like control. During sex. I like to see how much I can make Ryan feel. I like to drive him so crazy that I’m all he can think about, that the sensations I give him are all he can focus on. I don’t know why, but that’s what turns me on. And Ryan likes to give himself to me. He finds safety and security in giving up control, and I find the same things in taking it.”
James smiled at them and tilted his head. “It’s sexy. It’s exciting. It’s more intense than any vanilla sex I’ve had, not just physically, but emotionally. What it isn’t, is degrading. I’m not interested in taking over anyone’s life or fucking with their head.
“I have no desire to tell you what to do, and I definitely don’t want to have you kneel by my side and not interact with me. I understand why some people like that, but I’m not one of them. I don’t like humiliation or objectification, because I’m the type of Dom who thrives only when my sub feels cherished as the person they are. I want to take care of you. We want to take care of you.”
James gave Ryan a smirk before he continued. “What you saw out there is a group of amazing people who practice this lifestyle in many varied ways. Some of them really get off on protocols and consider us frauds because I don’t enforce such things. I do expect respect. I give it and I earn it, so I expect it. Really, that’s just good manners. Sometimes Ryan likes to call me Sir or Master, but it isn’t something I demand. When he does something hurtful, I’ll punish him. It’s a way for us both to express ourselves and clear the air. If Ryan didn’t need the physical punishment to forgive himself, I wouldn’t give one. That may be something that is totally different for you and that’s fine. As long as we talk when we’re upset with each other and resolve it, I don’t have a preference as to how that happens.
“I don’t believe in contracts either. This is a relationship and it’s fluid. We do what feels right. Any one of us who is uncomfortable with something has the right to speak up about it. The point of practicing this type of lifestyle, for us, is about fulfillment and joy. We want to make you happy, not make you worry about rules, punishments, or positions.” James lifted her foot and placed a kiss on the inside of her ankle, but Alexa wasn’t relaxing like Ryan had hoped she would.
“Well…okay, I’m sorry, I don’t get it. What do you do then?” Ryan managed to swallow down his snort, but just barely. Poor baby was really confused now.
He shifted her hair off her neck and licked her ear. That got a gasp out of her. “Why don’t we show you? Do you trust us enough to let us do that? You can always stop us at any time.”
It didn’t take her long to come to a decision. She straightened her back and gave a decisive nod. “Okay. I trust you. But just to clarify, do I need a safe word? Because I know about those and if I need one, I need to think about it. I mean, if it’s supposed to be something I wouldn’t normally say, how am I expected to remember it in the heat of the moment? Honestly, if I’m overwhelmed, I usually have a hard time speaking at all much less remembering something important.”
Ryan could just see her thinking up and rejecting about fifty words a second. They needed to shut her down. “Honey, if you need to stop, just say ‘stop,’ okay?”
Alexa actually looked a little disappointed by this. “Oh. Well, okay.” Ryan couldn’t keep the snort back this time when he saw James look to the ceiling.
Ryan pushed her to her feet and rose behind her. “Come on, angel. Let’s get you out of here and on to something a little more exciting before you come up with something else to worry about.”
* * * *
Ryan was not kidding. He wanted to move this show along. She was practically running to avoid being dragged behind them. When they reached the stairs, Ryan turned and picked her up. Just swept her legs out from under her and hauled her to his chest like she didn’t weigh anything as he marched up the stairs. She had to admit, she liked that. A lot.
When they got to the third floor, she saw that it was sectioned off into a maze of hallways. They passed a f
ew options and went directly to their left and opened a door. Inside, there was a king-size bed covered in beautiful jade-green bedding, and a table set in front of a bench in the wall. One leather chair faced the whole setup, and all of it faced a wall of glass with a stage on the other side.
Ryan put her down and switched the light so it glowed softly instead of bright. “That window is a two way. Nobody can see in, and the whole room is soundproof. We’ll be able to hear and see what happens on the stage, but nobody in the building will be able to hear or see us. Do you feel safe with us in here? Do you feel protected from others seeing us?”
Well, yes, she actually did. And she was touched that they understood her concerns about people knowing what happened between them. She was also more than a little curious about what was going to happen on that stage. “I feel good, Ryan. I feel safe with you both.”
James came up behind her and wrapped his arm around her waist. He slid his hand up until his arm was nestled under her breasts. Leaning down to her and resting his head on her shoulder so that he could look at Ryan, James rumbled, “Then let me show you how I like to take control.”
She felt that rumble all down her spine. Jesus. It was amazing how just this man’s voice could affect her. James settled with her in the middle of the bed while Ryan crawled up to close in on her other side. They were reclining against the backboard and pillows, James’s arm around her back, his hand squeezing her hip. Ryan shifted to his side so he could still see the stage, but his body was turned into hers and his arm was lying over her waist.
“First, we’re going to watch Lily and a Dom she likes to play with. It’ll give you an idea of something that both Ryan and I want to explore with you. I like to use restraint. It’s something that I think you’d enjoy.” He finished on another squeeze to her hip, and he brought his other hand to rest on her thigh. She had a hard time following his words as soon as he started sliding that hand up and down. She was mesmerized by the sight and feel of it. His large tan hand against her pale leg, curled over her knee and back down again. God, it was nice. His grip was so firm and sure, his hand was hot and a little rough. It didn’t feel like he was tentatively touching her, trying to decide if she liked how he touched her, it was like he loved what he felt and had every right to touch her wherever he wanted.
Alexa let her head fall back and enjoyed being in their embrace as she watched the stage before her light up, and she saw the padded inclined table there. Her eyes bugged out and almost fell from her face when a naked Lily sauntered into view. She immediately looked to James and watched his face break out into a smile. Laughing lightly, he assured her, “Lily gave me the okay to watch this scene if we wanted to. She’s not sure we’re here, but she wanted you to watch this.” His mouth formed a lopsided grin. “Lily likes to be watched, and she wanted you to see the ‘sensual side of bondage,’ as she put it. I like how Ben scenes, so I wanted you to see it as well. Are you okay to continue?”
Well. When in Rome and all that. If Lily was okay with it she wasn’t going to protest. Alexa smiled back at James and snuggled down a bit further into their arms. “I’m good, James.”
Ryan started caressing the underside of her breast as he began to talk. “Lily and Ben are ready. He’s big-time into bondage. Shibari to be specific. It’s like watching him create art. He’s actually blind, so you’ll see that he uses touch for everything. His entire focus will be on Lily. Her body, her breathing, her response to his touch. That’s what it’s about, angel. Reading every cue your sub gives you so you know what they need. It’s something I’ve been dying to do with you.”
Lily was as naked as the day she was born, but it didn’t seem crude or out of place at all. She wasn’t looking at the mirror. She didn’t seem self-conscience in the least. She was staring at Ben, who was a tall well-built man in a pair of leather pants, like he held the sun. There was a small table next to her that held ropes and safety scissors and Ben was touching everything, making sure it was in place like he wanted it.
When Ben finally picked up a long piece of rope and approached Lily, Alexa could actually see her eyes glaze over. Everything Ben did was methodical. He ran the rope over Lily’s swollen breasts, through her wide-spread legs. He used his hands to trace the same patterns. It was like he was memorizing her body. The rope was his instrument and it was definitely art. He swiftly created a harness for her breasts. He kept constant focus on placement and tightness through his touch. Alexa could feel her own breasts swell when Ben ran his fingers under the rope to make sure Lily wasn’t bound too tight.
As Alexa watched the scene before her, James was increasing the length of his stroke so that his hand was sweeping over to the inside of her thigh and up to her skirt. Ryan had smoothed down her corset and was undoing the lowest clasp. She could feel her body softening and getting restless. It was impossible not to lay her head into the crook of James’s neck and breathe him in.
After some more knots and weaving, Ben had managed to spread Lily’s pussy lips wide, exposing her clit. He brought the ropes through and behind her legs, between her butt cheeks, and up to meet her upper harness. Lily let him move and manipulate her like she was an extension of his body. After Ben secured Lily’s wrists and ankles to the corners of the table, he tied off the remaining rope and began to explore her like a man starved for her flesh.
“Imagine that it’s my hands and mouth on your naked flesh.” James breathed into her ear. “See how he’s exposed her clit? There will be nothing that he can’t touch, lick, and suck. She’s completely open to him now…helpless. She can do nothing but feel and take everything he gives her.”
Alexa could feel her heart pounding in her chest. She was breathing rapidly and clenching her fists. She’d never seen anything so erotic in her life. And Lily looked utterly enraptured. She could actually see Lily’s cream begin to slick up her folds, and Alexa could feel her own soaking through her panties. Ryan used his finger to explore the exposed flesh of her stomach as he continued to undo her corset. Once it was completely open, he spread it wide to reveal her breasts. She heard both men take a harsh breath, and James whispered ‘beautiful,’ as Ryan groaned quietly and grabbed both of her wrists in one of his hands. He held them firmly and raised them above her head.
She knew immediately when they noticed her scar. It had been so many years that the tissue, though puckered, wasn’t that raised or red, and her incision was barely noticeable, but if you never saw it before, it would look ugly. It would also look like something serious. People didn’t usually have such nasty scars under their breast. She wasn’t ready to tell them about it, but she knew she couldn’t put it off much longer. She just wanted that amazing languid feeling back. Just one moment to forget who she used to be. She looked into James’s eyes to see that he wasn’t disgusted, but hurt on her behalf. She closed her eyes and sighed in resignation that this night would end this way.
“No, angel. We’ll talk about this later, but I want you back in the moment with us. Right here and right now. There are no hands on you but ours.” James’s voice was rough and determined. He would give her the time she needed.
Ryan bent low to kiss her scars with reverence before he spoke. “Look to the stage, angel. Let us take you out of your head.” She trusted them. She wanted this and she could do as they asked. She’d put it all away for now and just let herself feel and experience.
Ben was caressing Lily’s arms and nuzzling her neck. He bit her collarbone lightly and Lily sighed. When he started to kiss and lick her breasts, Alexa felt James’s hand start to caress her own. Instinctively she tried to cover herself, but the grip Ryan had on her hands wouldn’t allow her to interfere. She felt herself clench deep within her womb with the realization that he could touch her, and she had to let him. It was incredible. She didn’t have to feel shame and she didn’t have to worry about what to do, being restrained took away her responsibility. She knew she could stop them, but she didn’t want to. She wanted to be held down and touched. She hummed an
d arched her back. Her nipples were already tight. Her breasts felt swollen and tender. James licked her right behind her ear, and she almost shot off the bed. Ryan gripped her wrists harder and grounded her back into the moment.
She could see Ben take one of Lily’s nipples into his mouth to suckle. Then he bit down and pulled on the nub. She groaned when James and Ryan each pinched and rolled her own nipples in time to Ben’s actions. The slight sting of pain shot pleasure straight through her core to her pulsing clit. She started to wiggle in frustration, needing more. Nothing had ever felt this right. James licked the outer shell of her ear and blew a puff of air. Holy hell. Alexa groaned and turned her face into his neck.
“Open your legs for me, baby. Let me give you pleasure. Let me feel what we’re doing to you.” James growled. She didn’t even think, she just spread her legs and laid one over each of their thighs.
Ryan kept his grip on her wrists and caressed the inside of her leg. He leaned in and started a trail of sucking kisses under her jaw and down her neck. On stage, Ben moved between Lily’s legs and he was kissing and licking his way up to her pussy. That totally bare and exposed pussy. Lily was squirming as best her bonds would allow, moaning and breathing fast and shallow. There was a sheen of sweat glistening on her skin. It was truly beautiful to watch. It didn’t seem scandalous or cheap, it was extraordinary.
As Ben began licking Lily’s core with slow strokes, James and Ryan slid their hands up and under Alexa’s skirt. James pushed her panties aside and circled her opening, gathering her cream and humming his satisfaction in her ear. “So wet for us. So fucking ready for us.” Her chest was heaving with the effort to breath. She stopped watching Lily and closed her eyes as sheer pleasure assaulted her.