As Patches’ mind raced, he turned the corner without looking and a transfer truck veered quickly to the right to avoid hitting him. Patches swerved too quickly to the left and his car tumbled over. Patches did all he could to take the impact but he felt his head hit the steering wheel hard. When he regained consciousness one week later, he was wearing a cast on his broken arm, his head was bandaged, and his leg was in traction. He was in so much pain. He felt someone squeeze his hand and tried to turn his head toward the person he felt near him, but when he turned it slightly, he had to stop. The little movement he made was excruciating.
“Sweetheart, I’m here for you,” she whispered.
“Jessica, what happened?”
“You were in a car accident. The police think you lost control of your car and it rolled over twice leaving you in this condition. The doctors said that you are one blessed man.”
Patches moaned. He tried to shift his body, but it was useless. He wasn’t going anywhere. “Where’s Sinclair?”
“Your mom is in the cafeteria with your dad. They took a break to get something to eat. They will be back in a minute or so.” She bent down and kissed his lips. Patches closed his eyes and succumbed to the pain pills. Patches’ parents would stay at the hospital until he was out of danger. They refused to leave their only child.
Days later, he was released from the hospital and taken to the McAfee’s home. There, his parents tenderly cared for his every need. Every day for one month, Jessica came to visit, and Patches found that he missed her when she was not there with him. He found himself looking forward to each day, because he knew that she would come over after work. When she walked through that front door, his mouth would spread into the biggest smile.
Friday was a great day, because Megan, Phoenix, Denver, and Jerickca all had come to see him. They had a ball laughing and talking. Megan wanted to know why he tried to run into a transfer truck. She told him he was not Hercules. “What were you thinking about? Jessica?” she playfully asked. He told her that he didn’t remember, but he smiled and looked into Jessica’s dazzling eyes. He felt so good being near her. After his friends and co-workers left the house, he pulled Jessica into his arms and gently kissed her lips. Earlier during the week, he had informed his parents that he really loved her and wanted to marry his sweetheart. McNary, Sr. had arranged for his favorite jewelry salesman from Zale’s Diamond to bring out diamonds in the two-carat range, and McNary chose a princess cut.
Looking into her eyes, Patches breathed slowly before he spoke, “Jessica, ever since I met you, I have found myself changing to become a better man. I want you near me every day, all the time. I love you so much. Jessica, will you marry me?”
Jessica started crying, and then she looked up into his eyes and said, “Yes.” Then she said, “I love you.” They kissed gently, and when they opened their eyes, they looked right at his parents who were both crying.
After Jessica called her parents and told them the good news, she spent the rest of the evening with Patches and his family. Soon they would set a date and start planning their special day.
Chapter 40
Phoenix lay on the bed crying and wishing that things could be different with Devante. But it seemed as if it was too late. He refused to reconcile their differences. He said that he knew that she was seeing someone and that it had really destroyed his trust in her. He advised her to get help, because he wasn’t sure he could ever forgive her for hurting him and their daughter, Simone. When she asked him about the woman he was with on the parking lot, he admitted that he had finally accepted her offer to go out two days earlier. He needed time to think about his life and time to decide where he wanted to be. They discussed how Phoenix never seemed satisfied with their lifestyle.
Devante cried when he told her how much he loved her and how hard he worked to make sure that she was happy, but every time she slapped him in the face with the words, “I’m not happy, I want more.”
She tried to tell him that she really did love him and was just too selfish to see that life meant more than material things. She begged him to stay with her and their child. But Devante walked out with only one promise, and that was to seek marital counseling. Now she sat on the bed crying, unsure where her life would end or whether or not he would ever forgive her. She had been so stupid. Now, all she could do was pray that God would forgive her and open the door for Devante’s heart to soften so that he would forgive her.
Phoenix was sure about one thing: if Devante would ever forgive her, she would never let him down again. She prayed that next Friday would come soon, because that was the day they had scheduled to talk to the marriage counselor. Until then, all she had was love and the hope that he would want to be with her again, too.
Chapter 41
Jerickca had a lot on her mind this morning. First, she had to call the caterers and plan a little dinner for her loyal staff. She wanted to reward them with special acknowledgements. She would also give them their raises for a job well done. They had found employment for more than eighty-five percent of their families. Some of their clients had married, and others had purchased homes for the first time. She wanted Thursday to be perfect, and she had three days to plan everything. More than anything, they needed some rays of happiness, because some of them were really going through a lot of trials and pain. She wanted to lift their spirits, if only for a day.
Jerickca was so excited that she found herself hyperventilating again. She did this often when she was upset or excited. She had gone to the doctor several months earlier and found that she was having serious panic attacks, which were treatable. Once she read as much as she could find on the subject, she learned to manage the attacks without medicine. She practiced controlling her breathing and staying calm and, to her surprise, they disappeared. She sat down, inhaled slowly, and took control of herself; and as quickly as the attack had started, it stopped.
Jerickca called her mother. She told her that she had talked to Barrington, who had a bad ear infection, which had caused her to lose her balance and walk into a wall. She had been treated by a doctor and was taking antibiotics to clear up the infection. Barrington had told Jerickca that she was afraid that something was seriously wrong with her, and that was why she was so secretive. Jerickca didn’t tell her mother everything that she and her sister discussed, such as how Barrington had begun to scream at her children out of frustration but promised that she had quit doing that when she started treatment for the ear infection. Also, Jerickca and Barrington had planned a surprise for their mom’s birthday and had kept it a secret for several months.
Jerickca told her mom that she and Anthony were in counseling and that life for her was definitely on the upswing.
Lula Mae said that Jeremy had gone without anyone’s help to a drug treatment center in Mount Vernon, Illinois, and that he had passed thirty-seven days of sobriety. She also told Jerickca that Pammie had broken off with her girlfriend and moved to Chicago with Detective Byrd. However, after running and trying to hide from her feelings, she found that she really loved Jamie. So she returned, and she and Jamie made up and moved to Chicago. They were planning a summer wedding with their families. Jerickca thought that Pammie needed much prayer, because she seemed so lost and unsure of who she was.
Jerickca and her mom made plans to have lunch on Friday, when they would continue to update each other on everything. When she hung up the phone, Jerickca called her pastor and set up a date for counseling and Bible studies. She was sure of one thing, and that was that she needed a strong relationship with God. She wanted to make sure that she understood what God expected of her, and she wanted to live according to His will. It would take time, but she would share what she learned in her Bible lessons with all her family members. Maybe then they, too, could find the peace they were seeking.
On Thursday, everybody at work was talking about all the changes that their coworkers were going through. Denver had submitted her resignation and was going to attend Washington University M
edical School. Patches was getting married. Megan had been fired but was still calling and asking questions about what was going on. Some days, she even showed up on the job, trying to be nosey and spreading gossip. She only came around when she didn’t see Jerickca’s car parked outside. This further alienated her from her old friends. She couldn’t move forward because she was stuck in reverse. They wanted her to progress and be happy with her life, because that was the only way they could enjoy her company. They missed her, but they didn’t miss the way she treated those she felt were beneath her. Phoenix and her husband were in counseling, trying to sort out their problems. The clients were continuing to progress.
When the meeting to plan the new fiscal year was over, the staff came out and headed to the backroom. Phoenix was the first to walk through the door. The room was decorated with balloons and streamers. Near the window in the far right corner was a long table filled with catered food. There was a pan of macaroni, seafood and pasta salad, green beans, cornbread, collard greens, chicken, ham, turkey, dressing, cakes, sweet potato pies, and a pecan pie. It was a beautiful sight, and all the food emitted aromas to savor. Phoenix asked, “Hey ya’ll, what’s going on? Who laid this table out with this food?”
Patches rushed over to the table and immediately started looking for the plates. “I don’t know who did it, but it’s for us since it’s in our office. I do know this: brother is ready to eat.”
Jerickca walked through the door and told everyone to take a seat. She had a table brought in so everyone would have a place to sit. Once all the staff was settled, she told them what today meant. “First of all,” she said, “I want to thank each of you for your contributions to both the program and our clients. We have had an amazing year and have seen our clients excel at levels that were higher than we ever expected. The success of this program is you. You all made this happen, because you were diligent, patient, and motivated. I wanted to thank you so I planned this lunch meeting. In addition,” Jerickca picked up some envelopes and completed her sentence, “I wanted to give you all a token of appreciation just to say thanks for a great year.”
She called out the names. “Phoenix, Patches, and Denver, thank you for your support.” She also gave Karen, Candy, and Kelvin their envelopes, as well as seven other workers. As they opened their envelopes, broad smiles spread across their faces. Phoenix was the first to say thank you, after which Candy stood up, walked toward Jerickca, and hugged her. “You are the best boss a person could ever have.” Everybody followed and hugged her, but Patches kissed her cheek.
Phoenix immediately saw that moment. “Boy! Jerickca ain’t one of your women on the street!”
Patches laughed. “Somebody is jealous.” Everybody laughed and continued to eat.
As everyone finished their meal, Denver asked, “Who cooked this food?”
Jerickca responded that B and F located on 19th Street had catered the food. They all agreed it was very tasty. As usual, the staff started talking about current events. They discussed war, terrorism, dating, marriage, and raising children in these times.
Denver said, “I’m sure going to miss the talks that we have shared back here.”
Phoenix stated, “Yeah right, like you participated in them all the time. You rarely came out to talk.”
“Sometimes I felt uncomfortable. You know, Megan made sure that you all didn’t get too close to me. She really confused me. There were times when I felt very close to her, and then she would rip into me and treat me like I wasn’t important. But I still liked her. She was so animated and full of life.”
“I know what you mean,” said Phoenix. “When Devante and I were going through so many problems because of me, she really helped me to pull myself together. She told me that the grass was not green on the other side—it was actually burnt! She told me to work out my marriage problem, and to go home and fight for my husband because there was nothing in the street but other women with no men on their side. She was so cool. Everything she told me really helped me to get through my ordeal.”
Karen laughed. “Then the heifer called me and asked me had I talked to you. Said I should call because you were having marital problems. I guess she couldn’t help herself.”
Jerickca jumped in the conversation. “It is possible that she wasn’t aware of what she was doing? You do know that there are some people who can’t see the pain and problems they cause others. They keep pushing until someone snaps. It is already too late to do anything about her. She was a good worker, and she had great statistics. It was the way she treated her clients. I have never seen anyone who talked about clients as bad as she did but would break her neck trying to make sure they were okay. Talk about a double-edged sword! Yet her clients were progressing and most of them did whatever it took to become economically self-sufficient.”
Patches looked up from his cake, “You would, too, if you were on her caseload. I think she really did care about them, but she was too shallow to see how her actions hurt.”
Just then the phone rang, and Phoenix picked it up. “It’s for you, Jerickca.”
“I’ll take that in my office.”
When Jerickca picked up the phone, it was the doctor returning her call. She told her that she needed to make an appointment because she felt that she had an eating disorder. She told the doctor that after eating her food, she would be forced to vomit. She then admitted that she had been putting her finger down her throat to throw up but had stopped because she feared that she would burst her esophagus. Since she stopped months ago, her body was doing it on its own. The doctor said that she needed to see her next Monday and would discuss a treatment plan. When Jerickca hung up the phone, she called Weight Watchers. Just as she hung the phone up after getting the date, places, and meeting time, she turned because she felt someone standing there.
“Deborah!” Jerickca cried.
They hugged each other, and Deborah told her that she had come back to practice law. She said that Danny had accepted a position in New York City and was marrying a model. Jerickca told Deborah that she needed to clear up a couple of things at the office and they could leave together. She excused herself to go to the backroom.
As she walked down the hallway, she could hear Kelvin, the janitor, telling everyone in the backroom the story about the gorilla at the St. Louis Zoo. “The Gorilla,” he said, “saw a woman that he wanted to get with and he said, ‘Damn that woman is fine!’ So he grabbed her from the outside of the cage and pulled her in. He was hugging and kissing her and trying to find where to put his tongue in the woman’s mouth when she started screaming, ‘I’m not a gorilla you fool.’” Everybody waited on the punch line. Finally, he continued. “The gorilla said, ‘You are a damn gorilla. Look at you! You’re hairy and black like me, you are big and wide like me, and you sure is ugly like me.’ He grabbed the ugly woman, started kissing her, and said, ‘You sure can kiss!’ Then the woman slapped me so hard, I dropped my bananas and ran out the cage.” The punch line was that Kelvin was the gorilla in the cage. Everyone started laughing, including Jerickca, who had stepped into the room to tell them that they could take the rest of the day off. Before heading for her office, she took a detour to the bathroom.
When she walked out of the bathroom and passed the backroom, they were still in there talking about sex. She walked back in, listened, and laughed for about five minutes.
Then she said goodbye to them. “I tried to give you all the day off, but I guess you all love this room so much you want to stay.”
“We are just chillin’,” Patches reflected.
“All right. I will see you all tomorrow.” With that, she walked back to her office.
Phoenix had walked up to the front to ask Jerickca a question without knowing that she was in the ladies’ room. When she walked through the door, she saw Deborah Dennison.
“Deborah!” she said, “where have you been? I have looked everywhere for you. I wanted to thank you for helping me through college. I never got a chance to tell you how much
I appreciate what you did for me. Thank you so much, because without you, I couldn’t have made it. Please forgive me for being such an asshole.”
They hugged and updated each other on their lives. Deborah told her that Jerickca was her best friend. This didn’t surprise Phoenix at all. She told Deborah that Jerickca was so cool. Jerickca walked in on the “Get Reacquainted Party” and opened the file cabinet to get her purse. She grabbed her coat and walked toward the women, who were talking. Phoenix excused herself, and Deborah told Jerickca that she would update her later on that conversation.
When Jerickca walked out the door, she turned to look back and saw that the staff was finally leaving the backroom. Jerickca laughed and thought, When information is needed that will help you grow or that may hurt your soul with pain, go to the backroom, the place where information can be dangerous or helpful, depending on who gives it, how it is given, and how the receiver handles what he hears. Backroom Confessions. Sex. Love. Pain. Success.
Backroom Confessions Page 22