by Mari Carr
It was probably just one of the wine girls coming to check on her.
“Open up, Kris. The lights are on. I know you’re up.”
Figured. Her mind was spinning out of control, so of course, Jason would show up. From the tone in his voice, she’d say he was ready to do battle.
Good. She’d hated his cold-shoulder routine the past couple of weeks. She had opened her mouth countless times to apologize for hurting him so, but every time, he’d scowled and walked away before she could utter the first word. Her guilt had soon given way to anger of her own. She’d been wrong, she could admit that. But the asshole wouldn’t stay put long enough for her to make amends.
She opened the door and found him waiting impatiently on her front stoop. He looked every bit as bad as she felt. “What do you want?”
He stepped inside without waiting for an invitation and slammed the door closed behind him. “You.”
She rolled her eyes and shoved him away when he attempted to step closer, invading her personal space in that way she loved far too much. “Forget it. If you think you’re going to walk in here, fuck me senseless, then leave without so much as a hi or a bye, you’re crazy.”
“Goddammit, Kris. I would love to talk about all of this, but you can’t open the fucking door looking like that. It’s more than I can take.”
She glanced down, wondering if he’d lost his mind. Her hair was pinned up haphazardly on top of her head. She was in boxer shorts and a ridiculous novelty T-shirt Laura had bought her for Christmas that had three wine goblets on it and said, My doctor says I need glasses. She didn’t look the least bit sexy. In fact, she looked sort of silly.
“You’re joking.”
He shook his head. “You’re beautiful.”
She grinned, blushing at his compliment. “And you’re forgiven for being such a horny bastard.”
Jason gave her a quick kiss before pressing his forehead to hers. “I’m sorry about storming out—”
“No. I’m the one who’s sorry. I never meant to make you feel so bad about yourself. I don’t think you’re a liar or a horrible person at all. Just the opposite.”
His hands lightly rubbed her back, but he made no move to pull her closer. “We’ve been working against each other.”
She nodded. “Yeah. Apparently I have a jealous streak a mile wide. It’s never been triggered before so I didn’t realize. It’s driving me up the wall. Making me say and do crazy stuff.”
Jason grinned. “Well, we’re going to have to call the jealousy issues a draw. I’ve hated every single second of these last few months you’ve been with Matthew. Every time you say that man’s name, I see red. It’s not a comfortable feeling.”
“We don’t exactly bring the best out in each other, J.”
“Maybe not, but can we at least agree we make each other a hell of a lot more interesting?”
She laughed. “Yeah. That seems to be accurate.”
“You and Matthew looked pretty chummy at the lake today.”
“Is that why you left early?”
He still held her close, neither of them willing to break the connection. Her hands rested on his shoulders as he kept her wrapped in a loose embrace. “Yeah.”
“He proposed.” She wasn’t sure why she shared that tidbit. It certainly didn’t matter considering she’d already refused, but part of her wanted to test the waters. See how serious Jason was about this. About them.
His eyes darkened. “Say no.”
She grinned at his imperious tone. She’d turned a corner this afternoon, more certain of her future than she’d ever been. Even so, old habits died hard. She and Jason had a very long history of teasing and she’d missed their feisty interactions more than she could say. It was time they tried to find their way back to normal. Or at least as close as they could get with the new status quo. “Are you seriously trying to tell me what to do? You realize that’s never worked in the past, right?”
He didn’t smile. “I swear to God, Kris, if you marry him, I won’t be held accountable for my actions.”
Damn. Kristen would have sworn on a stack of Bibles that power plays and alpha men turned her off, annoyed her.
She would have burned for that.
“Jason?”
“Yeah?”
She gripped his hips, tugging him roughly toward her. She wasn’t disappointed. His cock was thick and hard and ready. Just the way she liked it. “You were right. There will be time to talk after.”
He reacted to her words like a sprinter to a starting gun. It felt as if he’d sprouted several extra hands as he was suddenly touching her everywhere, stripping her clothing away with ease.
She went to work to uncover him as well, accidentally ripping his T-shirt in her haste to free him from the cotton. His shorts hit the floor with a swish and she discovered he’d arrived commando.
He pressed her more firmly against the wall at her back once they were naked. Then he was there, inside her. No preliminaries, no foreplay. Just the need to have their pure primal hunger assuaged instantly.
It occurred to Kristen she’d never wanted anyone with this much passion. Jason reached beneath her, gripping her ass and using the wall as leverage to pound inside her. Nothing had ever hurt so good.
She wrapped her legs around his waist, struggling to pull him deeper. She’d drag him straight inside her if such a thing were possible. Somewhere in her lust-laden mind, she realized her back curtains were open. Anyone in the courtyard behind her townhouse could see them. She didn’t give a damn. He was hers and she’d scream it to the world. Eventually. After.
Right now, all she wanted was him.
Then reality kicked in as Jason’s grip began to slip and she struggled to keep her legs around his waist. Sex against a wall was a hot concept, but damn if it wasn’t hard work. Kristen dropped her feet back to the floor as she and Jason fell apart, laughing.
“Ouch.” She rubbed her thigh. “Cramp.”
Jason stretched his back. “Guess this proves it. We’re officially old.”
She grinned and winked at him. “Nope. Not me. I’m still in my thirties. You’re the forty-year-old man.”
“Heartless woman. You okay with finishing this upstairs?”
She giggled, then grabbed his hand, tugging him toward the stairs. They might be getting older, but there was no denying the youthful spring in their step as they raced each other to her bedroom, diving on the bed at the same time.
Jason tickled her for a few seconds as she squealed, then…just like that…the passion returned.
Kristen knew in that moment what she’d been missing. Sex with laughter. Jason had given her so much over the years, but this felt like the best gift. After a lifetime of steady emotions, never reaching any peaks or valleys, Kristen was enjoying her time on top of the world—the raucous fun, the heart-pounding need, the pure delight in simply being held by this man.
Jason kissed her, caging her beneath him. She loved the way he covered her. It made her feel coddled, protected, safe.
Then she parted her legs once more and he was there. Pounding inside her. Telling her with actions rather than words how much she meant to him. Neither of them broke the connection of their lips, their bodies. They didn’t seek to explore or to do anything more than give and take in this most vital way.
Jason stroked her hair and face as Kristen drew circles on his back, both of them anxious to comfort as well as destroy.
He’d torn down the walls she’d erected around herself, dragged her from her normal, boring life and thrust her into a whirlwind of emotions. She’d never be able to repay him for that beautiful destruction.
“Kris,” he whispered.
“Shh.” She didn’t need to hear more. She knew what he wanted. “I’m there too.”
They came together, her orgasm striking a split second before his. Then their rhythmic dance became slower, punctuated with jerks and trembles and soft sighs.
Once the pleasure subsided, Jason rolled to his si
de, tugging her into his arms. She’d said they could talk after, but right now, words felt pointless.
What could be said that they hadn’t already told each other in that simple communion of hearts and bodies?
When Kristen opened her eyes, it was still dark. A glance at the clock showed it was three a.m. Then she heard the rustling that had woken her up. In the dim lighting provided by a streetlamp and the moon, she realized she was alone in bed. She watched quietly as Jason tugged on his torn T-shirt and pants. Apparently she’d been wrong to remain silent. Now it was his turn to run.
“You’re leaving?”
He spun to face her, then walked toward the bed. Sinking down on the edge, he nodded. “Yeah.”
“Why?”
“Because you have a decision to make. I can’t force you to pick me, Kris. And I sure as hell can’t watch you make another one of those manic escapes again tomorrow morning when your brain kicks in and convinces you you’ve fucked up somehow.”
“Jason, wait. I already—”
He stood up and started toward the door. “No. I’m finished with the waiting. Figure it out. One way or the other. I know what you think you want from a man and if Matthew fits that bill, I won’t stand in your way. But I know for damn sure, I’m a hell of a lot better for you. I can make you happy if you’ll just give me a chance.”
“I know. If you’d just stop trying to leave, I need—”
“You don’t have to answer me right now. Take a night to sleep on it. And if you need to find me, you know where I’ll be.”
“But I—”
It was useless. Jason was gone. Again.
She groaned, then threw her hands toward heaven in frustration. “Argh! What a jackass!”
Damn man. Could he really be that thick skulled? Did he think she was the type of woman who’d accept a proposal from one man, then sleep with another?
She threw herself back on the pillow in annoyance. Jason was right about one thing. It was time to settle this. Once and for all.
And she knew just how.
Chapter Nine
In Oregon, “dirty” talk during sex is illegal.
Two days later, Kristen paced the living room floor, waiting impatiently for a knock on her door. She’d called in sick this morning, certain it would bug the hell out of Jason, but seeing no other way around it. She had a plan to set in motion and she needed to take advantage of the opportunity when he’d be tied up at work and she’d be free to execute it.
She’d used the time to her advantage, succeeding in the first stage of her plan. As soon as the clock hit five, she’d called Jason and asked if he’d stop by after work to deliver a file. She’d played up the sick card, faking a cough, while pretending she was desperate to work through the illness due to the importance of the case.
He’d begrudgingly agreed to come over, though she could tell from his voice he was suspicious…and a bit nervous. Jason had clearly taken her absence today as a bad sign. She smiled. Served him right to spend a few anxious hours worrying. Bastard had left her alone in bed. And while she’d been physically sated for a little while, her libido had kicked back into action the second she’d heard the front door close behind him.
Just once, she’d like to dive in for seconds with Jason without hours, days or weeks separating the time between when she could find heaven in his arms again.
Finally, she heard his knock. She opened the door to find him standing on her threshold. His usual carefree smile was noticeably absent, but she wasn’t surprised. In his mind, he probably feared she’d called to give him the brush-off. To tell him she’d chosen practical, safe Matthew over him. God. As if. Maybe she’d been a fool in the past, but those days were long since gone, driven away by him and his hot kisses.
He took in her attire with surprise. Obviously he’d expected to find her in pajamas or comfortable lounge clothing, given her so-called sickness. Instead, she’d taken special pains with her outfit, leaving her hair down and wearing a silky blouse with the top three buttons open. Then she’d added her shortest skirt, stockings and high-heel shoes to the ensemble. His wide, appreciative gaze told her she’d hit the first mark dead center. Time for the next shot.
He handed her the folder she’d asked him to bring by. “Is this the information you wanted?” His tone proved he knew the request had been lame. The case contained in the file folder was a simple one that would require no more than a few minutes in front of the judge as they struck a bargain.
“Yep. That’s it.” She took it from him, then gestured for him to come in.
He walked in and she noticed he hadn’t shaved. His cheeks were covered with at least a day’s growth of beard that only enhanced his handsome features. He looked around the house, noticing the candles burning, the soft music playing in the background. Then he gestured to her outfit. “I thought you were sick.”
She smiled unabashedly, no longer pretending. “Nope. I feel fine.”
“So you were playing hooky?”
“Yep. I had some stuff to take care of today.”
He studied her face and she could see he was confused by her lightheartedness, her casual tone. She’d taken him off-guard, surprised him. She liked being able to do that. “Like what?”
She reached into her pocket and pulled out a napkin. She placed it on the table in front of him.
He looked at it and scowled. “How the hell did you get that?”
She grinned. “I broke into your house today.”
“You have the spare key, Kris. It’s hardly breaking and entering if you can unlock the door and walk in.”
“Breaking in sounds cooler. Besides it’s not like it was lying out in plain sight. I had to search for it.”
Jason narrowed his eyes. “You went rifling through my stuff?”
She laughed. “Not really. It was in the first place I looked.”
He tilted his head. “You knew it would be in my sock drawer?”
She shrugged. “Yeah. I remembered you saying once that was where you’d hidden all your most precious treasures when you were a kid.” She didn’t add how touched she was when she realized he considered their plan as something of value.
“So you got the cocktail napkin. Good for you. What’s that accomplish?”
“My birthday is in four days. We’ve really pushed this insane scheme right to the wire, but I think it’s time we stop pretending.” She tossed the napkin into a metal bowl she’d set out, and then picked up a pack of matches.
Jason frowned, his hand wrapping around her wrist as she set to strike one. “Wait. What are you doing?”
“Burning it.”
He flinched and she fought to restrain her grin. He didn’t get it. Yet. Hopefully once he understood, he’d be happy.
Please let him be happy.
He released her, dropping his hand to his side in a way that looked wholly defeated. She lit the match and tossed it onto the napkin. Both of them watched it burn in silence. Soon the flame flickered out and all that was left was a pile of ashes.
“So I guess that’s it.” He put his hands in his front pockets, looking miserable.
Kristen couldn’t stand it a moment longer. “Yep. You’re not my back-up plan anymore.”
“This is a nice little seduction scene you’ve set up. I think Matthew will really like all the effort you’ve put into it.” He started to walk out, but she halted him with her exasperated groan.
“This isn’t for Matthew, you jackass. I turned him down three seconds after he offered me that marriage proposal.”
Jason frowned. “You did?”
“Yes. And if you’d stuck around two nights ago, I would have told you that.”
Jason glanced at the bowl once more. “Then why did you burn that napkin?”
“Because you’ll never be my back-up plan, J. I don’t want us to be together because of a bargain struck during a moment of desperation and drunkenness. I want us to be a couple because we want to be together.”
Silence
fell around them as Kristen watched her words, the significance of what she’d done, sink in. She didn’t bother to fill it with chatter. Instead, she gave him the time to come to the same conclusions she had. They were meant for each other.
Then he narrowed his eyes, pretending to be annoyed, but she knew his mischievous look too well to be fooled. He was going to make her work for this even though there was no denying he liked where things were going. “What about our law practice? Thought you said it would destroy everything we’ve built there.”
“This is worth the risk. You’re worth it.”
He obviously liked her answer, but he wasn’t finished playing with her yet. She didn’t care. She enjoyed their cat and mouse games as much as he did. “Yeah, well, you also said we argue too much. That we’d kill each other within five minutes.”
She grinned. “I figure there are worse ways to go.”
He nodded slowly, pretending to consider her response. “That’s a valid point. But I sort of think there’s one insurmountable problem.”
Her smile faded as she realized there truly was one thing they’d never discussed. “Oh no. You want kids, don’t you?”
Jason’s eyes widened with shock. “Good God, no. Can you see me with kids? I fuck my own life up on a daily basis. There’s no way in hell I’d do that to some innocent baby.”
His words sounded sincere, but she needed to be sure. “Jason, I—”
“I’m forty years old, Kris. If I’d wanted kids, I would have done it way before now. Trust me. I’m not just saying that for you.”
She believed him. Jason had never hedged or lied about anything and he clearly didn’t intend to start now. “Okay. Good. So what’s the problem?”
Jason took her hands in his, tugging her closer. “You don’t think sex is important. I’m afraid I can’t agree with you.”
She rolled her eyes. “I suppose this is your attempt to get me to admit I was wrong?”
He shrugged casually. “Hearing something like that might go a long way toward persuading a man to get married.”