by Jane Toombs
The electricity was still off, so she crossed to the desk and turned on Daddy's new little radio that worked on batteries.
",,,measured 7.7 on the Richter Scale, making this a major earthquake," the announcer said. "Reports are coming in of railroad tunnels destroyed and some heavy damage in Tehachapi. Several persons are feared dead..."
Johanna walked away from the man's voice, from the twins, out of the library, out the front door, down the porch steps and into the sunlight. She headed for the stable, but stopped abruptly when she an immense rift in the earth between her and the outbuildings. As she stared in awe at the crevasse, the earth under her feet heaved several times in what she knew was an aftershock and, to her amazement, the rift closed part way, leaving a long crack.
Looking back at the house, she told herself safety lay nowhere. The Quake had killed Marie and maybe others in the towns. She thought of Brian in the mountains and prayed he was safe. But he had to be. It came to her then that, since his mother was dead, he'd be coming home for the funeral. But how could she rejoice in his homecoming, with such a reason behind it?
She took a deep breath and, stepping across the crack, made her way along the path among the pines to the grotto of St. Francis. She sighed with relief to see the saint still stood with the owl perched on his shoulder. Everything would be all right. Whatever the reason, Brian would be back at Hallow House.
With the series of continuing aftershocks, they talked and lived earthquakes all summer. Brian didn't return to camp after his mother's funeral, but Johanna was less happy than she'd thought. One day in the middle of August she sat by the pool with Naomi, watching the others swim and feeling completely out of sorts.
"I don't know why we had to stop having a tutor and start private school," she muttered. "Why couldn't Mama leave well enough alone?"
"I like school better," Naomi said unhelpfully. "It's fun." She gestured at the kids in the pool. "We've got lots of friends now."
"I know." Johanna's words were morose as she watched Sue splash water at Brian and heard her squeal happily when he dove in pursuit.
Glancing down at the two piece swimsuit she worse, Johanna grimaced. It was rosy pink, a color her mother insisted became her. Yet she had to more or less agree. The suit fit her well and made the most of her modest curves. The trouble didn't lie with the suit, but with Sue, whose yellow swimsuit barely contained her lush figure and contrasted brightly with her red hair.
"Sue's pretty, isn't she?" Naomi commented.
"Flashy, anyway."
"Why do you ask her here if you don't like her?"
Johanna didn't answer/ How could she explain that if she didn't respond to Sue's hints for an invitation, then Brian might. If he did invite Sue to go swimming, then maybe he'd also start asking her to do other things with him. Horseback riding. Tennis. And, when Kahweah Academy started classes in the fall, there'd be the dinner dances.
As it was, when Sue came to Hallow House to swim, Johanna made sure to include Cheryl as well. Though not as striking as Sue, Cheryl was pretty with her blue eyes and blond hair. Really blond, not the nondescript light brown Johanna felt her hair to be. Cheryl vied with Sue for Brian's attention--two seemed less of a threat than one.
Just when everyone thought all the minor quakes were over, the worst of the aftershocks came on August 22. The big crack in the front yard, partially filled in, closed completely. That night John suffered a mild heart attack.
Apparently Kevin had been urging him to retire and take it easy, because several weeks later, Johanna overheard the two of them talking in the library.
"Damn it, I'm only fifty-two," her father said. "Too young to retire."
"What does age have to do with it?" Kevin countered. "Why not think about passing on the responsibility for overseeing the business to somebody competent? You'll have to do that sooner or later anyway."
"It's a family business."
"And which family member will follow you?"
John didn't answer.
Johanna went on her way, thinking over what she'd heard. Finally she approached her mother. "Is Daddy ever going to have Brian work at the plant?"
Vera looked surprised. "At one of the plants? Why? Brian doesn't need the money."
"I meant in the main office, to learn the business."
After a moment, Vera said, "I don't know exactly what your father plans."
"I was just thinking that, except for Samara, I'm the oldest, but I don't want to run Lobo Foods. Ever. Samara's married and is going to have a baby, so she won't want to and Kevin's already a doctor. Brian is the logical one for Daddy to pick. He's a boy and he's part of the family."
When her mother didn't say anything, Johanna added, "When Brian and I get married, he'll be more like a son to Daddy."
"You're much to young to think of marriage," Vera scolded. "I've explained before that you're too closely related to Brian for marriage--it would not be a good thing to do. Bad genes can come together disastrously when children are born, You and Brian are not only first cousins on your father's side, but Marie and Delores were second cousins. You're related twice over--Brian is almost like your brother."
"But he's not my brother. I love him and we don't need to have any children after we get married."
"You and Brian are young. In a year or so you'll both have new interests."
After she left her mother, Johanna vowed she would never, never tell her what Aunt Adele had confided to her just before she died.
"There is another journal around here somewhere that belonged to Tabitha's companion," Adele had said. "She wrote just the one and it has few entries. In it, though, she implies that Celia and Micah had the same father—Boris."
"But Boris was married to Tabitha," Johanna pointed out.
"Alicia was also married to Boris' partner. But, in the journal she wrote, Alicia admits she was already expecting when she married this man and she hints the baby--Celia--was fathered by Boris. So, when Celia married Micah, she was marrying her half-brother. Which I do not suppose either of them knew. I have often wondered if this accounts for some of the oddities in the Gregory family."
At the time, Johanna had understood the words, but not the implications. She did now.
"I don't care, she told herself. Brian and I will get married, no matter what. We just won't have any babies.
School started and the first dance of the season came up. They'd all been invited to dinner at the Middleton home near Visalia. The dance afterward was at the Country Club. Naomi and Katrina were in a fever of excitement because they were finally old enough for Dinner Dances instead of "the baby stuff." Johanna was amazed at how grown up they looked in their white gowns trimmed with red/ Her own was a deep pink.
"You're my three beautiful roses," Vera said as she watched Brian help them into the Mercedes.
Mervin was being chauffeur for the evening. He was the twins' favorite of all the servants and Johanna liked him, too. He'd been hired soon after the July earthquake, the first Negro to work at Hallow House.
"Can we sing along with you?" Naomi asked Mervin as soon as they reached the end of the driveway. "If we sit in front we can harmonize really good."
Mervin stopped to let Naomi and Katrina climb into the front, while Brian switched to the back with Johanna.
"Let's start with the one about the devil," Katrina suggested.
Johanna listened to her sisters' sopranos blend with Mervin's bass:
"And when I die
Don't bury me deep
'Cause the devil chooses
From the bottom of the heap..."
Is there really a devil? she wondered.
Sue's house was set among pines as tall as those in the grove at Hallow House, but the land was flat. Acres of oranges and walnut trees spread out on every side. Even though it wasn't dark yet, Japanese lanterns lighted the path to the front door. As they got out of the car, Johanna took Brian's hand and he smiled at her as they walked together toward the house, the twins ahe
ad of them.
"First and last dances," he said. "Don't forget.
"I won't," she promised.
Naturally Brian's place at the table was next to Sue, while Johanna's was at the far end from them. She didn't mind too much because dinners were mostly eating anyway. At the dance, it'd be different.
Brian claimed her for the first dance and then there were innumerable ones where she danced with different boys. She was a good dancer, not too tall and agile enough so no one felt they were stepping on her feet, making her popular enough to enjoy the evening. She smiled and talked to all her partners, but knew every minute exactly where Brian was.
"May I have this last dance?" a dark-haired boy named Ralph asked her.
She glanced around, but for the first time this evening, couldn't see Brian. "I'm sorry, but I've promised it," she said.
As soon as Ralph walked away, she left the dance floor, peering into other rooms, while hearing the orchestra begin the tine that always ended the dances, "The Waltz You Saved For Me."
She hurried back, checking over the dancers. Brian wasn't among them. With an ache in her chest, she searched in vain for Sue's red hair. Edging through the French door onto the patio, she heard Sue's high-pitched giggle and saw her and Brain coming up the steps. It was too late to retreat so she walked toward them, head high, face averted. It was against all rules to leave the building during the dances, but some did, everyone knew that--and also knew why.
Brain caught her arm as she passed. She jerked free, running past him down the steps. She made it as far as around the side of the building before she tripped on her long dress and fell.
"What's the matter with you?" Brian demanded as he crouched beside her, helping her to sit up. "Are you hurt?"
"No." It was true enough, except for the way she felt inside.
"I was coming in for that last dance with you," he said. "Sorry about being a little late, but Sue--"
"Don't bother explaining." Johanna spoke as coolly as she could manage.
Brian straightened and reached a hand to help her to her feet. Light from a window illuminated his face and, coming up next to him, she saw the sear of lipstick across his mouth.
The next day he made her listen while he explained what had happened. Knowing Sue's ways, Johanna believed him, even when he said that Sue had kissed him, not the other way around. But the incident made everything different. Johanna no longer trusted the feeling she'd thought was between her and Brian.
As the weeks passed, it seemed she never had a chance to be alone with Brian--not really alone. If they took the horses out, one or both of the twins came along. In the house, someone was forever interrupting.
Since last Christmas, Vera had put a stop to any of the girls inviting Brian into their bedrooms or going into his. Johanna might have risked violating the ban, but she knew Brian never would. He'd do nothing to jeopardize his remaining at Hallow House.
Soon it'd be Christmas again. Ski season. Johanna loved skiing, but had missed some of the trips to the snow last year because she'd had the flu. Why couldn't she be like the twins, who never got sick?
"You're a Gloomy Gus lately," Frances told her the first Saturday in December. "Going around with a long face, just like your father."
"What's wrong with Daddy?"
"He's going to worry himself right into another heart attack, that's what. He's been trying to persuade your brother-in-law to go up to San Francisco with him and get acquainted with the business."
"Kevin? But he's a doctor."
"That's exactly what he tells your father."
"Kevin wouldn't go anyway," Johanna said. "Samara's baby is due this month."
Frances sighed. I know and you know. But your father's in a state."
"Maybe I should talk to him." Acting on her impulse, Johanna found him in the library, fiddling with his new television set.
"Is that the test picture?" she asked, staring at wavy lines jumping across the small screen.
"It's supposed to be a picture, but I'm not having much luck getting anything. We're a fair distance from San Francisco and with the hills in between I suppose it's to be expected. You should see the clear reception they get in the city."
Gathering her nerve, Johanna said, "Are you really asking Kevin to come into the business?"
Her father flicked the set off. "I must find someone."
"You always said you had the best staff in the state."
"I do, but they're employees. There's always been a Gregory heading the business ever since old Boris started peddling fruit door to door when he was fourteen."
She took a deep breath. "Brian is f-family."
"He's too young."
"C-couldn't you take him to San Francisco and begin to s-show him how to run things?"
"I think Kevin's a better choice."
"He's a doctor. That's all he's ever w-wanted to be. I've h-heard him talk about it."
"He's told me all that."
Johanna swallowed, knowing what she had to say and wondering if she could get the words out. "W-why don't you l-like Brian?"
Her father blinked at her. "I don't dislike the boy."
She pressed on, words tumbling from her. "If Brian and I got m-married, he'd really be t-twice family then, w-wouldn't he? He'd be your n-nephew and your s-son-in-law. Brian's s-smart. He can d-do anything he sets his m-mind to. And he w-won't always be young. N-next summer he'll he seventeen and he's g-graduating from Kahweah Academy a year early, you k-know. That s-shows how smart he is. I g-graduate then, too and we c-could get--"
"No!" her father all but shouted, his face grim. "That's enough talk of marriage. Never speak to me of marrying your--cousin again." Each word he spoke fell into her heart like icicles, piercing it through and through.
He grasped her shoulder. "I'll never permit such a marriage. Don't you understand it's impossible? My God, is this the thanks I get for raising Vincent's bastard son? And you." His face twisted and he let her go, turning away. "My God, my God," he muttered and then a word she couldn't quite hear, but sounded like "incest."
Shocked by her father's explosion, Johanna fled from the library, bursting into tears as she ran up the stairs. Needing to be alone, in a place no one could find her, she stumbled up the second flight of stairs to the north tower, a place she normally avoided.
There was dust on the floor, probably because her father had forbidden any servant to climb to the towers, so no one cleaned up here any more. Someone had been here, though, because there were footprints in the dust. Not that she cared.
She closed the door and leaned against it, sobbing, Finally she mopped her eyes with her sweater sleeve and crossed to the window sear where she eased down and gazed numbly at the grounds of Hallow House below, brown with early winter except for the pines and citrus.
Incest. Had her father rally said the word? Incest wasn't cousins marrying, so he couldn't have meant her and Brian. Incest was like Celia and Micah, if Adele's story was true. Her eyes widened. Of course she knew they were her grandparents, but she hadn't quite taken it in that they were also Daddy's mother and father. Vincent's, too. Did her father know his parents may have been half-sister and brother?
She shook her head. Mama had told her Aunt Adele was rambling at the end. Maybe the old woman had made up the story.
After a time she heard someone calling her name, the sound drifting up very faintly from below. She didn't answer. As she watched from the window, her mother and Frances came out, got into the Packard coupe and drove off. She knew they were going to see Samara because she'd been intending to go with them. The twins came into view in their riding clothes, turning toward the stables. Much later her father appeared with his walking stick, striding toward the orange grove.
If Marie were still alive, she'd be the one to ask why Daddy said what he had. Marie had known something, had been trying to tell whatever it was to her the night of the earthquake. About Delores, her birth mother.
Johanna tried to bring back Marie's
words. Don't believe what your father is afraid is so.
That didn't make sense.
Johanna's gaze shifted to the wall separating the tower room from the room behind the black door. Delores had died in there, that much she knew, though no one had ever told her how, Unease crept over her. Why didn't anyone talk about Delores? Or Sergei? He'd died in that room, too. In a gun accident, she'd been told.
The memory of the night she and Brian had gone into that room was a vagueness in her mind that she never examined. Kevin had come after them and Samara was there and... No, don't think about it.