The Cowboy’s Return

by Aarsen, Carolyne

  “Because you found her in the rain?”

  “I suppose.”

  His taciturn reply was a sharp contrast to the note of warmth she’d heard in his voice just a few moments ago. Probably regretting his lapse, she thought, turning back to Misty. She stroked the dog’s head. Misty’s fur still looked dull, but at least she didn’t look as bedraggled as before. “You’ve got such lovely markings,” Summer said, scratching Misty under her chin.

  Lucas stayed where he was, but she was aware of his presence. It filled the entire suite, took over, dominated.

  She petted the dog one more time, then tried to stand. But she overbalanced and grabbed a chair. Lucas was right there, his hand holding her up.

  Again.

  And once again she fought the longing that flooded her at his nearness. Though they had been apart longer than they had been together, he still ignited a burst of memories she thought she had buried deep.

  Not deep enough, she realized as she felt the warmth of his hand encircling her arm, remembering other times he would help her across a creek, lift her off a horse, guide her through a busy crowd after watching the rodeo together.

  She shook the memories off, pulling herself back to the present.

  To the decisions hanging over her head and the reason for them.

  “So, are you willing to join us?” Summer asked, keeping her eyes averted. She didn’t dare look at him as she re-fortified her emotions.

  In the heavy pause that followed she heard his breath, the tick of the clock above the sink, the hum of the refrigerator.

  “If you don’t, I understand,” she added, needing to lessen the weight of the silence.

  “No. I’ll come. I don’t dare leave Misty alone too long, so I can’t head to town to eat anyhow.”

  “Bring her with you,” Summer said, knowing that the dog would be a welcome distraction for her.

  “I don’t think Glenda likes pets.”

  “Maybe not, but technically it’s your house, right?” Summer risked a glance his way. “And I’m pretty sure she’s not paying rent.”

  She caught the fleeting shadow of an ironic smile. “I suppose you’re right.”

  “Besides, it’ll be good for her. Give her something else to talk about rather than her aches and pains and how few friends she has.” As soon as those last words left her mouth Summer wished she could take them back. “I’m sorry. That was out of line.”

  “Maybe, but probably very true.” He sighed, tunneling his fingers through his hair in a gesture that was so familiar it made her heart ache. At the same time it drew attention to the scar alongside his face, which bothered her more than she wanted to acknowledge.

  It reminded her of the danger he’d been exposed to.

  “Like I said, I know that you’ve had your difficulties with her…” She hesitated, realizing she was not the best person to give him advice, but it bothered her to see these two at odds. Though Glenda had never said anything, Summer could see how she looked at Lucas when he came into her room. The hunger in her expression.

  “She’s not been in my life long enough the past few decades for me to have any difficulties with her,” he said with a light laugh.

  Behind the breezy words, however, she heard the tinge of bitterness that always accompanied talk of his grandmother. He never spoke much about her when they dated, only to mention that Glenda was a phantom in his life. Summer knew they had lived all together here for only a short while. Glenda was his maternal grandmother, and she had moved into the suite Lucas’s grandfather had built for his own mother who only lived in it a couple of months. This way she could be close to Lucas’s mother. However, she had stayed in the suite for less than a year before Lucas’s parents died.

  That was when Lucas ended up at the Tye ranch.

  “I know, but I remember you telling me—”

  “It’ll be fine,” he said, his curt tone showing her that line of conversation was ended. “Besides, it’s just dinner.”

  Sort of. She couldn’t imagine anything ‘just’ happening with Lucas around.

  She averted her gaze, reaching down to finger the fur on Misty’s head. “Okay. I’ll take that as a yes, and if you’re coming I best get going.”

  “I should come and help—”

  “No. That’s fine. It’s nothing special. Sausages, pierogies, and salad. Pretty easy overall.”

  “Okay.” Was that a note of relief in his voice?

  “See you later,” she said, flicking a wave in his general direction and walking past him to the door. He hurried ahead to open it for her, like he always did. Grace and Zach Tye’s training, he always said whenever she teased him about it.

  Again she shook off the memories when he closed the door behind her.

  Then her phone dinged, and she pulled it out as she walked from one house to the other. It was Eve. She had spoken to the doctor and put the report on file for the future adoptive parents.

  As she read the text, she felt inexorably pulled in a direction she couldn’t change. It reminded her of a time she and her friends had been swimming in a small back eddy on the river flowing through Rockyview. She had miscalculated and ended up in the river. While she hadn’t been in any danger of drowning, the feeling of being swept along, against her will, and her inability to swim back, had been terrifying. She had no control; she just had to literally go with the flow.

  This was your choice, and it was the right one, she reminded herself.

  She just had to push the doubts down and get through this.

  Chapter 5

  “How long were you deployed in Iraq?” Glenda asked, taking a sip of her tea. “Unless you don’t want to talk about it.”

  “I was there for two tours. I got injured toward the end of my second tour,” Lucas said, his eyes sliding, again, to Summer who was cradling her mug, her eyes intent on the contents.

  Supper was finished and Summer had put a pot of tea and a plate of cookies on the table. They were so delicious that Lucas guessed they were homemade.

  He knew he should leave, but he knew he shouldn’t leave Summer to clean up by herself. Besides, he wanted another couple of those delicious cookies.

  “Were you artillery like your father was?” Glenda asked.

  “No. My last deployment I was involved with training,” Lucas said. “Working with members of the Iraqi army, helping them to help themselves.” He hoped Glenda wouldn’t ask more questions. He still felt awkward around her, and he sensed she felt the same. He had grown up with her coming to stay each time his father was deployed, so he was used to her. Though she was never a warm, sweet grandmother, she’d seemed to care for him.

  That’s why her decision to drop him at the Tye ranch had been a hurtful shock.

  And then there was Summer.

  Despite the discomfort, it was kinda nice not to be eating by himself. He knew he could have gone down to the Tye ranch and he would have been welcome there, but he didn’t want to show up with a dog as well.

  He glanced over at the front door where Misty lay on the rug. She was obedient, and she listened well. So he sensed someone had trained her.

  “Your father never wanted to talk much about his experiences overseas, so I won’t ask you any more about it either.” Glenda gave him a tight smile then stood up. She turned to Summer. “I’m tired. I’m just going to go to my bedroom and read for a while.”

  “I’ll help you,” Summer said as she struggled to get up, but Glenda waved her down.

  “Just stay here and visit more with Lucas. I can manage on my own, like you keep telling me.”

  Lucas shot her a wary glance, wondering if she was up to something. But Glenda didn’t even look at him as she grabbed her walker and trudged off to her bedroom.

  Despite Glenda’s protests, Summer still got up and watched her warily as she disappeared down the hallway. A few moments later Glenda closed the door behind her with a firm click.

  When Summer returned she cleared the table, and Lucas got up
to help her.

  “It’s okay, I can do this myself,” she protested.

  “You made dinner, there’s no way I’m letting you clean up as well.”

  He picked up the plates and brought them to the sink, then returned for the rest of the bowls.

  “Thanks for dinner, it was fantastic,” he said as he set the leftovers on the counter.

  “Nothing special,” she said.

  “It was special for me. The army isn’t known for its cuisine, and those cookies were sure amazing.” Lucas leaned against the counter. “I imagine you made those yourself?”

  “When Glenda is sleeping there’s little to do. And I don’t have a lot of energy to do much more than bake.”

  Lucas couldn’t help but glance at her stomach, more questions rising up. Not exactly the elephant in the room, but it came close.

  “And how are you feeling? Besides tired. You said you had a doctor’s appointment. I hope everything’s okay?”

  The questions spilled out of him, in a rush he couldn’t seem to stop.

  He blamed it on a combination of nervousness around her and a genuine curiosity.

  “Everything’s fine.”

  He waited a moment, but it seemed that’s all she was saying.

  He rinsed off the plates and set them and the utensils in the dishwasher.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, as she scraped the leftovers into a glass container and snapped the lid on. “It’s a legitimate question. It’s just… This pregnancy…”

  To his surprise her voice broke, and she looked quickly away.

  “Sorry,” she choked out. “Hormones.”

  He waited, sensing there was more to her loss of control than the pregnancy-related hormones.

  “But otherwise, you’re okay?” He couldn’t help ask, another vague bid to maybe find out even the smallest bit more about her situation.

  She turned toward him, leaning back against the counter for support. She lifted her chin and held his eyes, the look on her face challenging.

  “I’m guessing you’re asking more about the social aspect of my pregnancy than the physical.”

  “That’s one way of putting it.” He was surprised at her directness.

  She averted her gaze, her lips thin as if weighing her answer. Finally she spoke, her eyes seeming to drill into him. “This is no secret, so you may as well know. I’m giving this baby up for adoption.”

  She spoke the words quietly, but they dropped into the space between them like heavy rocks in a river.

  “Adoption? Really?” The words burst out of him before he could stop them. He couldn’t believe that Summer would do this. She had always talked about how important family was, especially after the loss of her brother.

  “I’ve seen my mom trying to manage being on her own and working, and I’m not putting this baby through that.” Her voice broke again, and Lucas had to resist the urge to touch her, to create a connection. Show her he cared.

  But he had touched her accidentally before, and he knew how dangerous that would be. So he kept his distance.

  “Of course. I understand.” He didn’t really, he was still trying to wrap his head around the idea she was even pregnant. “I’m assuming the father is not involved?”

  This netted him a stony silence as Summer’s eyes skipped away from his. Her cheeks grew flushed, and he saw her hands clenched into fists.

  He was guessing the answer was no.

  “I’m sorry to hear all this,” he said, his voice sincere. “I hope…I hope that everything goes well.” He wasn’t sure what else to say.

  Which almost made him laugh. Since his injury he had been the one on the receiving end of half-formed questions and curious glances. Now he was on the other side of that.

  Summer was quiet a moment, and he thought this would be a good chance to leave. He had done all the damage he could.

  “I hope so too,” Summer replied finally. “I know this must be difficult for you, and despite how awkward the situation has been, I appreciate your concern.”

  “It’s more than concern,” Lucas blurted.

  Her eyes flew to his, her expression full of alarm.

  “What do you mean?”

  Lucas couldn’t backtrack now. And he found he didn’t want to.

  “We used to be close,” he said, his voice quiet as he took a step nearer to her. “At one time in my life I thought we would be married, and living here. In this house. Having our own kids.”

  She closed her eyes, her fist pressed to her mouth. She shook her head once, then turned away. “Please don’t do this,” she whispered. “We can’t go back. Neither of us can.”

  That wasn’t what he had in mind, but he wanted to ease the awkwardness between them.

  “I know we can’t,” he said. “But we used to be friends. I’m hoping we can find some part of our past we can still share.”

  Friends wasn’t what he wanted, but he also knew he couldn’t expect more.

  “Maybe that can happen.” She tweaked out a wistful smile. Then to his surprise and dismay, she brushed her hand over his cheek. It was the gentlest of touches, but it was like her fingers burned his skin. It was pleasant and yet not. A crossing of a boundary he had erected against her and struggled to guard.

  Very poorly it turned out, as her touch created an unwelcome shiver of awareness.

  “This scar of yours—what happened?” As she lowered her arm, her hand drifted across his shoulder.

  “Stray bullet.” He released a harsh laugh to cover his reaction to her touch. “Not a combat injury. One of the trainee’s rifles misfired.”

  “Is your eye okay? Have there been side effects?”

  “I lost my peripheral vision in that eye, and I get debilitating headaches at times.”

  “Like a migraine?”

  “I’ve never had a migraine, so I wouldn’t know, but it hurts a lot.”

  “Again, I’m sorry you have to deal with this.”

  “Me too, but I got off easy compared to others. I’m still alive and mobile and I’ve got all my limbs, so I’m thankful for that.”

  She released a melancholy smile. “Despite breaking up with you, I was praying for you.”

  “That’s good to know.” However, the thought she couldn’t be with him, couldn’t stay engaged to him, but still prayed for him, created a mixture of confused emotions.

  He wanted to say more, but she had turned back to the leftovers, wrapping them and putting them in the fridge.

  This part of the conversation was over.

  “Well I guess I should go,” he said. He could take a hint when one was given.

  “I packed up some food for Misty. I don’t know if she’s used to people food, but it’s probably better than just milk for now,” Summer said, handing him a plastic container. “I hope she doesn’t get sick from it.”

  “That’s not much of a compliment to your cooking.”

  Summer chuckled at that, easing some of the tension between them. Then she snapped her fingers as if remembering something.

  “The Facebook page. Did you want to go on it and put on an announcement about Misty?”

  “Right, I almost forgot about that.” Just a bit distracted, he thought.

  “I’ll get my computer, and we can check that out.” She left, slowly making her way down the hall to her bedroom. When she returned, she had a laptop, which she set on the table. She opened it, frowning at the screen in another familiar gesture.

  “Still don’t like computers?” he asked, remembering that she often commented about how they were a necessary evil.

  “I’ve finally mastered them,” she said. “Still not a huge fan.”

  “But you know how to get on Facebook.”

  “Louise pushed me to get my own page though lately she’s been talking Snapchat and Instagram. I can’t keep up.”

  Lucas chuckled at the annoyed tone in her voice.

  “I imagine your phone takes pictures?” she asked, still not looking at him, still focu
sed on the computer.

  “Yes, it does.”

  “Take a picture of Misty and text it to me, and I’ll post it.”

  Lucas slipped his phone out of his pocket and walked over to Misty, who lifted her head and looked expectantly at him.

  “Okay, Misty, it’s time for your close-up.” He took a couple of pictures, then walked over to Summer and handed her his phone. “I’ll let you take care of the rest of this,” he said.

  He sat down on the chair beside her while she picked up his phone, tapping on it with her two thumbs, her lower lip tucked between her teeth like she always did when she was concentrating.

  The sight twisted his stomach, and once again he had to suppress a raft of memories. Maybe it would get easier the longer he stayed here, but he sensed it would always be difficult. He had woven so many dreams around this girl, had so much hope for a settled future. Being around her nudged those memories to the foreground.

  “So I wrote this up,” she said, turning the laptop toward him. “Tell me what you think.”

  Lucas read over her description of Misty and smiled at the picture of the dog. “Looks good to me,” he said. “But how will we know if someone claims she’s there is legit?”

  “I didn’t say where she was found,” Summer said. “So I’m hoping that will narrow down the prospects. I’ll keep an eye on the page,” Summer said. “Let you know if someone responds.”

  As if she knew they were talking about her, Misty got up and walked over to him. She laid her head on his lap, looking up at him with her liquid brown eyes. Lucas smiled, petting her head.

  “You know I always wanted a dog,” he said, still ruffling Misty’s fur. “But my parents said we moved around too much, and for some reason we didn’t have a dog when I lived on the Tye ranch.”

  “Don’t get too attached,” Summer warned. “If we find the owner, she’ll be going back.”

  “I know that,” Lucas said. “Besides, once I leave, I won’t be able to take her with me anyway.”

  Summer stared at the computer screen a moment, silence rising between them.

  “So you don’t want to settle here?”

  “I did at one time,” Lucas said. Then he realized how that might sound.