I check my weapons a second time while sitting in the back of the off-road truck as it bounces around the heavily wooded path to get to where we’re heading. We’re lined up like sardines in a tin can. My gear is heavy, and it itches in places I can’t get to. The bulletproof vest makes me feel suffocated, but I know it protects me. One stray shot could take me down without a second’s notice.
My eyes are burning from the poor conditions outside. The tropical weather hasn’t been kind to us during this operation. It rains, sometimes buckets. Then it’s hot as hell. The bugs eat away at our skin. I’m constantly slapping parts of my body in reaction to a new bite.
We’ve been on this route for nearly an hour. Its loud and the sound of the squeaky metal vehicle and it’s contents makes it hard to hear the person in front of you. Others in my unit are doing the same thing with their equipment, a few have headphones in to get warmed up for the attack. What we do takes precision, and a set of big ass balls. There’s always a chance we’re not coming home, so I choose to make sure I spend every second doing what I’m good at just in case I don’t make it to see tomorrow. It’s kind of like boxers preparing for a fight. They get into the zone. So do we.
I check the surrounding area again. We’re way out of range, but you never know when we’ll be ambushed. Cell service is non-existent. Satellite phones aren’t to be used leisurely.
We are at the mercy of the driver.
Moles are common in my line of work. All it takes is a handful of cash or a promising bribe to change someone’s morals and turn them against the people they’ve sworn to protect and serve. All the money in the world wouldn’t make me change my mind about the assholes we try to take down. There’s too much evil for me to be able to look away. I’ve seen things a man can’t unsee. I’ve watched women and children thrown around like ragdolls. I’ve carried kids out of harm’s way after they’ve watched their mothers and fathers being slaughtered too many times to count. This isn’t a man’s world. It’s full of innocence just begging for salvation. We don’t just take down the bad guys. We have to deal with the aftermath. Sometimes we’re the cause of those deaths. A bust can result in countless innocent deaths. Once the gunfire begins we do what’s necessary to protect our own. Thanks to technology we’re now able to see how many people are inside of buildings, and sometimes if they’re small children.
Don’t get me wrong. Kids do what they’re told. They smuggle drugs just as easily as the parents, some unknowingly. They don’t know right from wrong. They need help, understanding, and a chance at something better.
I’m that salvation. I’m a soldier; the best damn DEA agent my unit has to offer. I take pride in being in charge. I wake up everyday with the purpose of seeking justice. I prepare my group for the worst of scenarios, and put their safety above my own. This is my duty. I took an oath, and do my best to stand by it.
House is my second in command. His first name is Greg, but we haven’t called him that ever. He’s too big and brawly, best known for kicking ass and taking names afterwards. House fits him.
He’s sitting like a statue with his eyes closed, as if nothing in the world bothers him. I admire his ability to meditate before the shit hits the fan. I’ve always had too much on my mind to completely shut out the world and imagine I’m somewhere else. I guess I’m wired differently.
Malone is a new recruit. She’s relied on the rest of the team to show her the ropes. This is her first real field mission, and I can tell from the look on her face that she’s freaking out. She’s used to being behind a computer, providing us with vital information pertaining to each case we’re working on. Her little petite frame makes me nervous. Maybe it makes her more agile, but I see it as a weakness. Up until she was ordered to go out into the field she’s always worn a ponytail, but she arrived off the plane this morning with a shorter cut, as if it would somehow make her look tougher than she really is. Whatever the reason, I can already tell she’s a loose cannon; someone who is going to get us all killed if I don’t keep her in check.
It’s hot, but we’re not sweating like pigs. She keeps wiping her forehead and staring forward, which happens to be fixed on my bullet proof vest. I waved my gloved hand in front of her to catch her attention. “Yo, Malone, you with us?”
She nods quickly and lifts one of her weapons. “Yes, sir.”
“Stay alert!” I move my gaze around to make sure everyone is paying attention. “One person slips the whole plan is fucked. Get your shit together people, we’ll be arriving any second. Stay quiet and out of sight. We’re expecting security to be high. Expect complications. We need to keep gunfire to a minimum if at all possible. The less fatalities we have the better this shit will look on paper. Got it?”
They all nod and agree. I’ve repeated this a dozen times to most of them. I expect they have it memorized, but it’s important to stay on top of things. If they mess up it’s on me.
Renner chimes in like I expect him to. He’s the smart mouth of the group. They call him prettyboy because he looks like he’s going to some gay underwear fashion show on most occasions. He primps and worries about his appearance more than any man I’ve ever known. He’s also cocky, and doesn’t hold back when it comes to hooking up with random women. I’ve had to reprimand him before when he got a bit out of hand. Being held up in one place for long periods can do that to some people. “Listen to the boss. His anger issues come from a huge case of blue balls.”
I nod and roll my eyes. “Not in the mood to be tested, Renner.”
“You love it. No one else can get your blood boiling like me, boss. Face it, you want to be me.”
“Yeah, like I want the clap.”
When the vehicle comes to a halt everything is quiet. I can hear someone coming in on the radio. The other team is in position. The driver turns and looks to me for guidance. “If we get any closer we’ll be seen. We need to keep the vehicle in the jungle.”
I nod. “Alright people. You heard him. This is our stop. Gather your things and let’s get this show on the road.”
It’s too quiet.
We’ve surrounded the area and have our guns cocked and positioned. We’re ready to take action. Then we see the small aircraft coming in. It descends, the wheels coming down right before it makes contact with the ground beneath it. I wave my unit to follow me. We spread out and prepare to surround the area. The door opens and a small ladder extends. A man comes out with his hands on his head. He’s looking behind him and screaming. My group remains under the confines of the vegetation until I give them the okay to pounce. I know they’re all seeing what I am, but we’re too far away to make out exactly what he’s trying to say. Then I hear the word socorro, and I know exactly what it means. HELP.
A woman emerges from the aircraft with her hands behind her back. Her mouth is gagged and she’s trying her best to get down the steps. Just as I recognize it to be our informant Maria an explosion erupts from the plane, sending both adults forward before they tumble to the ground.
This can’t be happening.
I don’t wait to signal my team. I run full force in her direction, desperate to save her life. When I reach her, the legs of her pants are on fire, while the whole front of her is smoldering. I throw my body on top of her to put out the flames before flipping her over to check for vital signs. Her condition is bad. Tiny shards of metal are in her skin. She’s bleeding and unresponsive. Her heart isn’t beating. I begin CPR. She can’t die. I won’t let it happen.
While I’m struggling to save her life, I recall the last conversation I had with her. “If anything happens to me I need you to make sure my kids are taken care of. Get them to the United States and place them with a family who can give them a good life. Don’t let them know how I die. Just tell them I’ve gone with the angels.”
“I’m going to keep you safe. You’ve got nothing to worry about. I promise.”
She smiled at me when I said it, like she had all the trust in the world that I was a man of my word. “Thank y
ou for helping me. I owe you everything.”
I keep counting as I blow air into her lungs in hopes she’ll begin to breath again. She is badly burned and covered in dark ash from the fire. Her hair is singed to her scalp in some areas. Pieces of her face are completely missing. This woman is gone and I have to come to terms with it.
Behind me I hear House ordering the crew to keep an eye out for an ambush. I’m too worried about these two victims to consider I could be right in harm’s way. While I struggle to revive the woman, a few of my unit members come to assist with the other person. Minutes pass. Neither survives.
I survey the scene and know we’ve been set up, yet again. Pulling out my radio to signal dispatch is unimaginably hard for me. I hate failure, especially when people have to lose their lives.
While I deliver the bad news, I hear House calling my name. I turn and see him pulling something out of Maria’s hand. It’s a balled up piece of paper. As he unravels it we discover a message.
Are you happy now? How does it feel to have their blood on your hands, Agent Douglas? This is what happens when you meddle. I know who you are. If you mess with my family, I’ll destroy yours one at a time. – Alizar
It’s like a punch to the gut. Not only did I get Maria killed, but now I know for sure someone is feeding him impertinent information from inside the agency. He knows who I am. My life is probably in danger, but all I can think about is the threat. He’s talking about my family. It’s obvious he’s speaking about my team. I can’t let anything happen to them. If I have to pull us from the case and have it reassigned, it’s what has to be done.
House and I look at each other and shake our heads. “God Damnit!” This can’t get any worse. I throw my hands in the air. Maria has kids. She was working with us to ensure they’d have a better life. Now they were going to be alone, all because of us. It felt like shit.
“What the fuck, man?” Renner responds. “How could they know we’d be here? Only the people in our division knew about this raid.”
It’s a struggle to see the look on his face and know he’s right. “Fuck if I know? Shit!”
All of a sudden the radio comes on. It’s one of the agents from the crew waiting to do the bust on the compound. I pull it up so I’m able to speak directly into it. “Go ahead.”
The person’s voice is static-filled. “It’s on fire. Can you hear me? The whole place is up in flames. There was an explosion. We’ve got a mess over here. There are people running around injured. People are still in the buildings. We need air support now! How long until ground assistance can get here?”
The rest of the team comes to stand around me. They’re listening, and as alert as I am. Rather than us seizing the property and confiscating his drugs, Alizar took matters into his own hands to ensure we’d hit a dead end once again. He’d killed more people and I felt directly responsible. I’d made the final decision to take down the operation. I’d brought Maria into this mess. She’d still be alive if it wasn’t for me. I’d bribed her to help us in exchange that she wouldn’t be prosecuted. Now the only person suffering prosecution was me. Guilt riddled, staring down at her dead corpse, I wished I would have went with my gut. I knew something was wrong, but I’d ignored it. Now I’d live with this forever.
“We’re on our way!” I announce.
With our situation contained to a small area, we call for assistance to manage the scene so we can head over and help the other location. If there’s a mole in my group I need to know who it could be. If it’s higher up within the agency all hell is about to break loose. My job is on the line. My team is on the line.
This isn’t going to go over well.
Before climbing back into the vehicle to head out, I turn to my team and address them. “This fucker is going down. I don’t care how long it takes us. He’s always a step ahead. It’s time we stop playing into his hands. Too many people have died. We’re better than this.” I kick the truck. “Fuck!” Needless to say I’m pissed. I’ve spent countless hours making sure this ended with little loss and now I’m left devastated. We all are.
Malone puts her hand on my arm. “We’ll get this guy, Moth. I didn’t request to go out into the field because I thought we’d fail. You did everything by the book.”
She means well, but I’m too stubborn to calm down. “Go take your seat, Malone. The day ain’t over yet.”
Chapter 3
“God Damnit! Of all the times for you to fuck up, Moth. This is a fucking problem you need to fix. I won’t go down for this bullshit. You told me you had everything under control. People are dead. How many fucking times are we going to screw this up? Now you want to ask for time off? Are you out of your fucking mind? We have a mess here. You can’t up and walk away. We’ve been infiltrated. Government officials could be in danger at this very moment. The FBI is breathing down my neck for an explanation. I’ve got two illegal children sitting in an office with no one to claim them. You’ve made promises you can’t keep, because everything is screwed to shit. Do you have any idea how many tactical teams I’ve considered for your position in the past twenty four hours?” I’ve been in my director’s office back in Miami for the past two hours. We are on a first name basis, although I don’t think he wants to be called John today. If I had to bet, I’d say he’d like to be in a foreign country where no one was able to find him.”
We lost thirteen people during the failed raid on the compound. Four were agents. Upon returning to the surveillance platform house we discovered it had been burned to the ground – all of our collected intel either destroyed or in the hands of the enemy. This was a catastrophe. We’ve taken safeguards to protect most of our files, but they could have gotten enough to learn who we were and how to track us down. This is the worst possible scenario. We’re getting backlash from the president on this matter, and if it isn’t cleaned up soon I’m afraid of the consequences. Since I’m in charge this falls on me. What really blows is that I was responsible for backing up the files the night before, but had been out getting my dick wet instead of managing my duties, because I’d gotten too comfortable. I wanted this to be over. I truly believed we’d capture Alizar and seize all his property, including any pending shipments.
I’m used to being yelled at. A marine father isn’t the most gentle kind of parent. That’s why I joined the military as soon as I was of age. I needed to get the fuck away from my overbearing, verbally abusive dad. I expect this kind of treatment. In some ways I deserved it for letting my guard down.
People were dead. I could have prevented it.
Now I’m hearing shit because I’ve asked for time off to tend to a matter with my family. I’d never been close to Jamie. We were thirteen years apart in age. My father was only married to his mother for a couple of years before she left him, and I couldn’t blame her for it. I knew she couldn’t deal with him any longer. When she left I was a teen. I rarely saw my brother, and in the past ten years, I’ve probably talked to him twice. It still bothered me to know he was gone. I didn’t have the details yet. I suspect it was a car accident. According to our good ole dad, Jamie was in grad school with a perfect GPA, and intent on being a Chemical and Biomolecular Engineer. He was in his last year, and with our dad’s contacts I knew he could land a kickass job. He had everything going for him, and no reason to get into trouble. At the time I heard the news, I was still too riled up to ask more questions. It had been a long day and night, and now all I wanted to do was take a flight back to Virginia and help my father bury my brother.
“Sir, with all due respect, I know this isn’t the best of times, but my brother is dead. I, at least, need to go home for the funeral. I’m asking for two days. As soon as he’s buried I’ll be back to work. I won’t stop until we get this son of a bitch. As far as the kids, well we made a promise to their mother. I won’t go back on that. There are families looking to adopt on waiting lists. I’m sure there is someone out there who would take them. Don’t send them back. They have no one to care for them.”
<
br /> He jots something down on a file. “The kids are the easy part.” When he looks up at me he seems to have simmered down a bit. “And what about Alizar knowing your identity? Maybe it’s time we let a set of fresh eyes review the case. There has to be something we missed. Is it possible your brother was murdered?”
I’m stricken with worry, but don’t allow it to show. “No. It was some kind of accident, probably vehicle related.”
“Find out. We need to think outside of the box. If he knows you, there’s no telling what else he’s dug up. We have to remain on high alert. He’s made this personal.”
“Yeah, I know.”
I’m clenching the chair arms to prevent from losing my temper. I’m not about to hand over the reigns to my operation, but I know I need a couple days to deal with family matters. I have no choice but to do what is best for the agency. “Do what you have to do. I’m sure my team would enjoy a little time off. In the meantime, I need to book a flight. Are we done here?”
“No. We’re not done here. It’s a clusterfuck!”
“Look, I get you’re frustrated. I know the orders to move in came from above, but I did things by the book. We obviously underestimated how deep Alizar’s pockets are. If he knows who I am, he’s gotten to me from inside. There’s no other solution. Someone told him where we’d be. They informed him of our surveillance platform.”
“You haven’t been fraternizing with anyone? What about the rest of your team? Renner? House?”
I understand he’s curious. That’s all it is. There’s no way he knows I’ve been hooking up with Ali. I haven’t told anyone about her, not even House. I’m sure he suspects, but I tend to keep my personal matters to myself. It’s safer that way. “No.”
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