We were riding in the back of my Bentley, and on our way to the airport in Paris to catch my plane back to London. I couldn't say a word, and Alex looked away.
"I told you to fuck her, not completely lose your head to her."
He was right. I had lost my mind.
He shook his head. "I have never seen you this crazy for a woman. Why the hell do you want her out there so badly anyway? She belongs in your bed, nowhere else. You want to put a hit out on her? Don't you know the battles we’re currently in the midst of right now?"
I want to give her the chance to meet her mother, was what came to mind. However, I didn’t say it out loud. Then I would have to admit that not only had I gone out of my way to uncover it, but to ensure that her mother would be attending the event tonight.
Perhaps she didn't know the woman, in which case no harm would be done since she wouldn't even be able to recognize her, but if she did, what happened from then on would be up to her. But now with Alex's cold but completely rational rebuke, I was starting to wonder if I should have waited. Until it was safer.
But fuck it all. Why should I wait? I wanted to see her, to touch her, to have her by my side. I looked at Alex. “Don’t fucking talk to me like that,” I spat.
He chuckled. "You only pull out the authority card when you know you've messed up. That’s good then. Screw your damn head back on. Stop letting that girl turn you into a pussy." He got out of the car before I could swing my fist in his direction, and strolled across the tarmac towards the waiting Bombardier Global 7000.
With a sigh, I did the same, and soon we were in the air.
I changed on the plane so as soon as we arrived in London I was driven straight to the Grosvenor House hotel. I stepped out to the flashing of cameras and a bright red carpet welcome. It was the annual Fulfilling Dreams charity ball hosted by the Mayor of London’s office. It was in my best interest to be here and to splash the occasion with as much money as I could throw at whatever nonsensical plans they had brewing. Tonight would be nothing less than two million.
A beautiful usher met me with a dazzling smile and offered to lead me to my table.
I had other plans. "Await my plus one instead,” I told her. "April Winters. Make sure to show her straight to her seat and alert me on her arrival."
My order was taken, and I turned around to the approach of the smiling face of affluent real Estate Mogul, Akshay Khan.
Chapter 33
April
I have no business being here.
I stood in a brightly lit hallway. True, I was no less lavishly decorated in my stunning Chanel dress than anyone else in the place, but they all seemed to know what they were doing and where they were going.
The men, with gorgeous diamond-embellished women on their arms gilded by, while I stood alone, wondering what I’d gotten myself into.
I took two deep breaths...and felt even worse so I was about to leave, when I saw her.
I froze.
My mother was here. She had a man and an elegantly dressed young woman with her... and they were coming towards me. Our eyes didn't meet as they went by. I was still in shock, so I subtly started to follow them. They joined a cluster of dignitaries who they smiled and shook hands with.
“Can I help you?” someone asked.
I jumped and turned around.
An impeccably dressed usher in a dazzling sequined gown met my eyes. “Do you have your invitation card, Madam?”
“Uh, no.”
“Perhaps you are meeting someone?” Her eyebrows rose and her voice sounded a tad colder.
“Yes. I’m meeting Mr. Yuri Volkov.”
She glanced down at a clipboard she was holding. When she raised her head, she was all smiles again. “You must be April Winters?"
“I am."
She smiled. “I'll show you to your table.”
I followed, and was led to a table meant for eight. It was elegantly set with bouquets of blood red roses, and tall candles. My mind was in turmoil. I couldn’t believe she was here. What were the chances?
I told myself to hold my head up and enjoy the night no matter what happened and accepted a champagne flute from a tray carried by a passing waitress.
I settled in and with my eyes, I sought out my mother. I found her easily. I didn’t feel any emotion as I watched her smile and talk to people. A few minutes passed, then I realized that she was my mother in name only. I wanted nothing from her. Not even recognition. If nothing else, this night showed me that I could close that door once and for all. I drained my drink. I would give Yuri a few more minutes and then I would take my leave.
Music was playing, and some people were already smoothly heading to the dance floor. I watched and out of nowhere, I heard his name being called out.
"Mr. Volkov."
I turned and watched as the young woman I’d spotted with my mother ran towards him.
He stopped but his eyes were on me, and only when she reached him did he turn to her.
She flushed, and almost couldn't say a word.
Oh yes, I understood exactly what had come over her. I grabbed another drink, but it felt like shards going into my system as the liquid went down. I wanted to rise, to leave, but I couldn’t move. I couldn’t take my eyes off Yuri and the woman. She was laughing up at him. The table I was sitting at began to fill up. I received polite nods from the guests as they took their seats and I prayed that no one would ask me who I was.
The prayer wasn't answered.
I soon realized both the Mayor and the Deputy Prime Minister respectively were just a few seats from me. I drained the glass and wondered who the hell had seated me here.
“Hello, are you here with Yuri?” the mayor’s wife asked me.
Yes, that’s right I’m a nobody. My only worth is I’m sleeping with Yuri Volkov, I wanted to say but instead I rose to my feet. "I need to use the Ladies. Please excuse me."
I was out of there and it took everything I had not to run across the room. I kept my chin up and finally got my escape. When I got to the restrooms, there were too many people at the mirror, so I found an empty stall, sat on it, and called Charlotte.
She didn’t pick up, and I wanted to flush the phone down the toilet. I wanted her to tell me not to be cowardly, or to talk some sense into me to realize my place and to get out of here. I had no clue of what to do.
Eventually, when the bathroom quieted down, I got out of the stall and stood in front of the gigantic mirror to kill more time by reapplying my lipstick.
Ask him about Yulia, I reminded myself. If she's not here then it means he tricked you. You can then leave.
A woman came up to the mirror. I tucked my hair behind my ears. Our eyes met in the mirror and I froze.
Chapter 34
April
It was my mother… and she was smiling at me. My chin trembled, but somehow I was able to stretch my lips into a thin smile.
Her smile widened as she extracted a gold lipstick case from her purse.
I stared at her in amazement.
Her eyes were bright and her short hair was a beautiful dark blonde. She looked nothing at all like me, but damn she was beautiful.
"You're sitting beside Yuri Volkov,” she noted.
I nodded politely in response.
"Are you two..." She raised her brow suggestively.
The smile left my face. The disappointment I felt was so great I was sure she would never be able to comprehend it. I couldn't hold back. "It's none of your business," I said tightly.
The smile left her face also.
I pretended to adjust my hair until she moved a step closer to me. I turned and looked at her.
"I don't know who you are," she said, "but you look, quite out of place here. Just because you wear a designer dress, doesn’t mean you can fit into a strata of society you don’t belong to. So I'm here to give you a piece of advice. Take it in the vein it is given. I’m being cruel to be kind. You are wasting your time with Yuri Volkov. He will play with
you and then he will leave you for someone from his social circle." She smiled then and turned to take her leave.
"Don’t you recognize me, mother?" I asked when she had already flounced away and shut the door behind her.
The tears fell from my eyes before I could stop them. "Ah, fuck," I cursed, and quickly wiped them off my face. I wouldn’t let myself cry. I turned towards the mirror. My eyes were bright with unshed tears. Not here. Not among these cruel people who understood only money, power and social class.
I thought of my mother. How she had climbed the ladder herself and yet, she had tried to stop another who she recognized as a social climber. It was heartbreaking, but I understood exactly what had happened. My own mother saw me as the interloper. She was saving Yuri for that elegant young woman she had come with.
I watched myself in the mirror. What was it about me that gave me away? My hairstyle? My lack of social graces? I’m not covered in pearls and diamonds? Or something else intangible only they understood.
I straightened my shoulders. Well, they were welcome to their stupid world. I wanted nothing to do with it. I was done with this party. I would just call a taxi and go back to my own little apartment. And Yuri? He can go fuck himself.
I was walking out of the Ladies when my phone rang. It was Charlotte, so I picked up immediately. There was noise all around her.
"I'm really busy right now, are you okay?” she asked.
Just hearing her voice suddenly loosened the knot in my chest, and suddenly I couldn’t hold the tears in anymore. They came rushing down my face. “Where are you?” I blubbered.
“I took a waitressing gig just for one night. It’ll help pay some bills.”
"I'm so sorry," I apologized, “I have no idea what the hell is wrong with me.”
"I'm going towards the bathroom," she said "Tell me everything.”
“No." I shook my head. “You might get in trouble."
"I'm in a corner now," she said to me. "You have five minutes, start talking."
With a sigh, I turned away from the main room and headed towards a quiet corridor which ended with a fire escape door. "I don't know what's wrong with me, Charlotte." I sniffed. "You know I don't normally care what people... you know, I don't let people move me. You know this, right? But I’m here. I don’t have jewelry, and my…my mom’s here—”
“What?” she bellowed in my ear.
“Yeah, she’s here. She didn’t recognize me and I didn’t tell her who I was. She’s with a man and a young woman. The woman knows Yuri. I think she’s kind of—um… oh, God—I think she wants him, Charlotte.” A sob escaped my mouth. “Oh, God, I feel so insane right now."
"Hey, calm down. You’re not insane and they're not just people,” she said quietly, "One is a man you just might have fallen in love with, and the other is a mom that didn't even bother to at least know what you look like. I would be thrashing out that entire gala by now if I were you. And you know me, I’m a basket case. I’m not kidding.”
I almost laughed as I wiped the tears from my face with back of my hand. "I know."
"You're actually sobbing,” she said in wonder. "The last time was when Bambi’s mother died."
I took deep breaths. "Actually, I’ve cried a lot since I met that bastard.”
“Whoa. How is this his fault?”
“I don’t know. He just left me there.”
“Give him a break. He just got back from wherever he went to.”
“He was flirting with that woman."
“I thought you said she was flirting with him.”
“Yeah, she looked like she wanted him to fuck her right there in front of everybody,” I cried, jealousy burning in my stomach.
“So what? Even I want to climb that hard body. It doesn’t mean anything. The question is, does he want her? And if he doesn’t, you have nothing to worry about.”
“Well, he didn’t look very encouraging…”
"Are you going to leave?"
I sighed heavily. "I think I should, don’t you?"
She sucked in her breath.
“Charlotte…” I warned. It was a bad sign when she sucked in her breath.
“You’re at Grosvenor House Hotel, right?”
“Yeah,” I confirmed cautiously.
“Guess what? I am two minutes away. Literally next door.”
“No, don’t come here,” I protested
“Oh fuck,” she swore suddenly.
“What?”
“Almost the whole restaurant has just seen me crouching in the corner like a thief with a phone to my ear.” I heard the sound of shuffling and her saying, "I'm sorry everyone. I have an idiot for a sister. You know how it is. Boyfriend problems."
"Stop... Charlotte... you won’t be able to get in, anyway. They ask for your invite as soon as you get into the hallway.”
“I’ll get in through the back door. Waitresses in full uniform have privileges.”
We laughed like two crazy girls and then she hung up.
Chapter 35
April
I loitered around the Ladies. I was sure she wouldn’t be able to get in, but less than five minutes later she was walking up to me in her black and white waitress uniform.
She pulled off her favorite pair of earrings from her lobes- bees carved in pearls and reached up to place them on my ears. "You said you had no jewelry. Now you do. Yeah, they're cheap and they can't be compared to the overpriced dress, or shoes you're wearing, but nobody will really know they’re not real."
"Oh Charlotte, I can’t wear them. I’d be too afraid of losing them. Your Dad bought these for you before he passed away."
“They are priceless to me, but so are you. That woman, who bore you, is probably the poorest creature on earth because she has no clue who she chose to forget about. You're the rarest treasure in this shallow place, April...so enjoy the rest of your dinner, and don't you dare feel less in any way than all these sad, misguided people hiding behind their designer clothes."
She brought out my hair to cover the earrings, but I tucked my hair back behind my ears and looked into her beautiful blue eyes. "They can't be hidden.”
"Just try to make it through the night without losing your temper and beating someone up," she said with a smile.
"Hey, this is me you’re talking to. I don’t beat people up. I leave that to you."
A waiter passed by with a tray of canapes. She lifted one and put it into her mouth. "The truffles are amazing," she said. "And there's bound to be caviar coming later on. It tastes like shit but make sure to have some for the stories later on." She grinned at me. “Okay. My work here is done. I gotta go. I still need to get paid for tonight. I’m not working for nothing. Love ya.” With a wave, she turned and disappeared down the hallway.
Seeing Charlotte changed everything. I got my strength. I didn’t feel small or inadequate anymore. I felt strong. It was Charlotte I wanted to emulate, not these shallow people.
I returned to my table, head held high, and saw Yuri. He was already seated, but his eyes were roving the place. I knew he was looking for me.
The MC announced the Prime Minister’s arrival at that moment, but I couldn't take my eyes off the man who had turned my life upside down. Dashing was a pitiful word.
Dressed in a black tuxedo, his hair was brushed back away from his face in thick effortless waves. Under the bright lights of the room, his skin was like burnished gold. I noticed the ever present and tiny furrow between his brows, but you could only see them by staring too much at him. He was so beautiful. So mysterious. So unreachable. I almost couldn’t believe he had been inside me.
He stood out in the room, unmistakable, incomparable, intimidating...
From afar, he was Mr. Volkov, billionaire extraordinaire. However, to me, he somehow became Yuri, the ravishing brute that seemed to have been created not only to blow my mind but to jumble up my emotional state.
I ran my gaze down his clothes. Underneath was the sculptured chest I had trailed kisses
down countless of times, and thick biceps built with raw primal strength I had dug my nails into. My gaze went back up to my second favorite place on his body. No prizes for guessing what was first on the list. Those lips. I had kissed them feverishly and they had in turn returned the favor on me—everywhere.
I slipped into my seat and smiled politely at the others at our table, but I was so aware of the man beside me I feared that I would jump if he were to even touch me. I wanted to look into his eyes to again see that primal lust which set me ablaze. Was it still there? I took the champagne flute on the table and gulped down the golden liquid until I nearly choked. I covered my mouth as a small cough escaped me. Yuri leaned into me, his body heat automatically frying my brain.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
I couldn't respond. Just gave a nod.
An orchestra performance started to play. It was a full philharmonic orchestra of not less than 60 members. I listened and allowed the heavenly sounds to soothe away my nerves. It worked, so by the time they were finished, my applause was heartfelt.
The night wore on with speeches, most of which I couldn’t fully decipher but it was all for some good or the other, so I applauded in the appropriate place. Food arrived and I played with it until expressionless waiters came to clear my plate.
Eventually, it was time to dance. Both Yuri and I stayed in our seats. People came to speak to him, but he seemed to cut off conversations quickly.
When I couldn't stand it any longer, I turned to him. "Where's Yulia?”
His response was simple, "She's not here."
"You told me that she would be," I said.
"I'm allowed to change my mind."
"She was never supposed to come, was she?"
He looked deep into my eyes. “No.”
We both went quiet. Just then, someone came up to me and when I looked up, I saw that it was the young woman who’d come in with my mother. I didn’t know who she was. Maybe she was my sister? I felt sad suddenly. She didn’t even know she was my sister, but even worse, if she did, she would have been horrified to have a nanny for a sister.
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