“The rock star life,” I whispered as I looked at myself in the mirror.
I did my hair the best I could.
I took an old Filthy Line shirt from Sab and cut the right shoulder to make it bigger and then after putting the shirt on, I tied the excess cloth into a knot on my left side.
It was the best rock n’ roll look I could pull off.
I was nervous for Sab.
For no real good reason. It wasn’t like he hadn’t played ten million shows or something in his lifetime. But just the idea of him getting on stage and playing music…
I felt heat rush to my cheeks.
I needed to calm myself.
The house was big but when Sab and I looked at each other, it felt really small.
I had seen him walk out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel. The first time, I looked away. The second time, I stared too long. The third time, he dropped the towel and turned, showing off his ass, which made me gasp and find an excuse to leave the room.
Not that I was any better at this.
I would shower and walk around the bedroom in a towel like I owned the place.
And Sab always found himself in the bedroom. Staring. Smiling. Sometimes asking me to just open the towel and get it over with.
The lines between friendship, harmless flirting, and wild, sexual tension were very blurred.
And I knew if-
“Look at you,” Sab said as he appeared in the bathroom doorway.
I turned and stepped back.
My face was bright red as I couldn’t stop thinking about his firm ass and me wondering what would have happened if I had dropped my towel in front of him.
“You okay?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I said. “You scared me. I was just getting ready.”
“Our ride is here,” he said. “We have to leave right now.”
“Sure. Of course. Yeah. I’m ready. Are you sure I look okay for this?”
Sab blocked my path and reached out and touched my cheek. “You’re perfect, babe. You’ve never needed fancy makeup and all that shit. Don’t change now.”
“Thanks,” I said.
My body ached and burned.
If I was going to stay any longer with Sab I needed a plan.
I needed… a few minutes to myself in his shower. With one of those shower heads working its magic.
Just as long as I didn’t think about him while I did it.
Or…
As long as I didn’t think about Sebastian - my best friend.
But I could think about Sab - the bad-boy rock star.
Right?
“You look nervous,” Liv said to me as she handed me a drink.
“I am,” I said. “It makes no sense.”
“I get it,” she said. “I used to get that way too. It’s a crazy feeling. Standing here. All these people wanting to see your man.”
“Oh, Sab isn’t… we’re just…”
“Right,” Liv said with a smile.
I opened my mouth to fight back a little but all the lights went out.
I gasped and grabbed for Liv’s hand.
“The show is starting,” she yelled to me.
The fans started to cheer.
Shadowy figures emerged seconds later. I realized it was the band.
One by one, they all walked past us, a guitar in their hand, heading to the stage.
My teeth chattered and my heart raced.
When I saw Sab, I waved to him like I hadn’t seen him in years.
He simply nodded to me.
It was that cool, bad boy head nod that threatened to break my heart.
Fuck.
I hurried to drink whatever it was Liv gave me.
It was some kind of mixed drink. It was sweet. I couldn’t really taste the alcohol in it, but I knew it was there.
The band took to the stage and started to play without saying a word.
The song they played was the new one they wrote.
As soon as I realized what song it was, my eyes filled with tears.
It was such a sad goodbye kind of song.
The lights slowly came back on, a spotlight pointing at each rock star on stage.
They played. They sang.
The five of them…
I had to look down more than once and wipe my eyes.
I couldn’t believe the circumstances that brought me here.
All the years between Sab and I…
The song ended and the place erupted in cheers.
I clapped too.
“Thank you,” Nash’s voice said. “Tonight, we’re here to think about Mitchy. This is for him. From us. If you know the words, sing with us.”
Sab looked at me and nodded.
I blew him a kiss.
He stupidly reached out and caught it.
My heart raced.
I looked at Liv.
She was smiling ear to ear.
I handed her my empty cup.
“I need another one of these, please.”
Being on the side of the stage and having access to the backstage area was a whole different world.
Anything I wanted, I had.
There were drinks. Food. Everything possible.
A small crew worked to make sure the band’s sound was spot on.
It was amazing to see what happened while the band was playing.
Those drinks Liv had been feeding me were doing the trick.
I went from buzzed to drunk over the course of one Filthy Line song.
I then paused for a bottle of water, but the damage was done.
My body wasn’t meant for this kind of living. I wasn’t the type to get drunk more than one night in a row. But current events… and my current surroundings…
I drank the bottle of water, then got another real drink.
The band stood up and Nash ran a hand through his sweaty hair.
“Thank you all for being here tonight,” he said. He looked to his left. “Hey, Donny. If you hear me, turn the main lights on. I want to end this show with everyone able to see each other.”
A few seconds later, the main lights slowly turned on.
People kept cheering.
“Hey, quick,” Sab said. “If you have a drink, lift it up. Let’s say goodbye to Mitchy together.”
Hands and cups were in the air.
I even put my cup up in the air.
I probably looked like some drunk groupie dancing around the side of the stage, but I didn’t care.
As much as this was for the band and for Mitchy, it was for me too. For my mother. All the emotion they poured out on stage I felt go through me too.
The band remained standing as they sang their last song.
The crowed sang it back to them, and at one point, the crowd was louder than the band. They stopped playing and just let the crowd take over.
Sab took his guitar from around his neck and put it down on the barstool he had been sitting on. He put his hands together and nodded to the crowd.
As he walked off the stage, a group of fans all jumped and cheered for him. Screaming his name. Wanting him. A few had no problem letting Sab know they were willing to let him sleep with them.
Or as one lovingly put it… please come fuck me!
I felt jealous, but that subsided when Sab came to me instead of the fans.
He put his hands on my sides, at my ribs, and he held me there, staring down into my eyes.
“You were fucking amazing,” I said.
“Thanks, babe,” he said.
The crowd kept singing.
The band exited the stage one by one.
All I wanted in that moment was for Sab to kiss me.
I bit my lip and knew if that happened, everything would change.
Then again, wasn’t that the whole point of life? It was built on the fact that everything changes?
When we left the venue, the band walked together and the women walked separately.
I understood why when I heard the scream
s of the fans.
There was a group waiting for the guys out back.
“This happens all the time,” Candice said to me.
“How did they get back here?” I asked.
“You can’t imagine what they’ll do to get an autograph,” Abby said.
The band walked to a tall gate with security so they could sign some autographs.
The other women left but I watched and marveled.
It took me back to sitting in my garage on a warm summer night with Sab. Or Sebastian at the time…
It was close to midnight and as long as I didn’t leave the garage, my mother didn’t care.
Sab roamed the town all hours of the night, dreaming of being a rock star.
That night though he talked about signing autographs.
When he described what it would be like, his eyes lit up.
So I asked him for his autograph.
He signed a piece of cardboard for me.
Then being who he was, he asked if he could practice signing my boobs, because that was going to happen someday.
Sure enough, as the memory rolled through my mind, a woman leaned forward and pulled her top down.
Now she didn’t flash her breasts but it was pretty damn close.
She smushed her left breast to the gate and Sab reached through and signed her chest.
It made me smile.
He really went and got the dream he always wanted.
I climbed into the SUV and waited for Sab.
After a few lonely minutes, he opened the door and got inside next to me.
I looked at him and he put his hands up.
“What?” he asked.
“What…?” I asked.
“You look pissed.”
“I’m fine.”
“Are you jealous?”
“Of what?” I asked.
Sab leaned toward me. “You know, the offer still stands.”
“What offer?”
“To sign your tits,” he said. “I still remember the night I offered.”
I laughed and pushed him away. “Yeah, right.”
The SUV started to move.
After a few seconds, Sab touched my hand. “I saw you during the first song.”
“Oh?”
“You were crying.”
“It’s a good song.”
“It’s yours, babe.”
“What?”
“The song,” Sab said. “That’s your song now. I want that to be your song. Okay? I’ll get you all the recordings for it. I’ll get you handwritten lyrics. I want you to remember those moments. They were important to both of us.”
I nodded. “Yeah. It hits home.”
“It does,” he said. “So I did my thing, Bree. I got drunk. I wrote a song. I played a show. I got into a fight. I said goodbye.”
“I know,” I said. “I saw it all. I’m glad I saw it. I’m glad I was-”
“It’s your turn now,” he said.
“What?”
“It’s your turn to do the same,” he said.
“You want me to get into a fight with Raunchy Recks?” I asked.
“Bree. I’m being serious.”
“Sab, I’m drunk right now,” I said. “I think you might be too. What are you doing?”
“Why did you come here?”
“I don’t know. It just felt right. I wanted to get away. Clear my head.”
“Are you clearing your head?”
“What the hell is this? Are you going to mansplain to me how to grieve?”
“No, babe. I just want you to be real.”
“So, I’m fake right now?”
“I didn’t say that…”
“You probably should stop talking,” I said.
“Bree.”
“Shut up, Sebastian,” I growled.
I looked out the window and didn’t talk to him for the rest of the drive back to his house.
And when we got there, I walked inside and went right for the bedroom.
Of course, Sab chased after me.
It was his house which meant there wasn’t much I could do.
I hurried to the master bedroom, my plan was to hurry out to the balcony and even lock the door behind me.
Sab was quick.
I was drunk.
When my hand touched the handle of the balcony door, his hand grabbed mine.
“You know what I fucking meant back there,” he growled.
“What did you mean?” I asked.
“I don’t want you here hiding. And I don’t want you to wake up one day and just leave. I want to know what’s going on. With you. With me. With us.”
I looked back at him. “You want to know what I’m doing here?”
“Yeah, I do, Bree.”
I took my hand off the handle and turned to face Sab.
I reached up and touched his face.
“This,” I whispered.
I moved to my toes.
His hands grabbed my sides before I could kiss him.
I gasped and felt chills explode throughout my body.
“This,” he said.
We started to kiss.
It was just a kiss.
Before my mind could finish that thought, the kiss grew hotter. Grew deeper. Sab’s hands cupped my face. My hands grabbed his wrists, but I didn’t pull his hands away. Our tongues began to wrestle, each passing second felt like a year of missed opportunities between us finally catching up.
Okay, it’s just a little bit of making out. We’re drunk. It’s not like…
Sab kissed down to my neck. He slowly put my head back.
I stared at the ceiling and felt his kisses moving down to my chest.
At the same time his hands eased from my face and moved around to the back of my dress. As the dress began to loosen, my entire body shivered. I wasn’t sure how far this was going to go, but I had an idea…
Sab’s a rock star.
And I’m…
I wasn’t sure what I was to him.
I wasn’t sure that I cared either.
He guided my dress down my arms then down my body. Moving with speed and confidence, in a way I had only thought could happen in some wild fantasy of mine.
Maybe two… three times in my life I had taken a moment or two to think about what it would be like if Sab and I hooked up.
But this…
I looked down and the rock star drummer was on his knees before me.
Touching my legs, making sure I didn’t lose my balance as my dress was about to become more useful as a decorative throw rug on his bedroom floor.
When my dress was off, Sab looked up at me.
I was left before him wearing black panties and a black, strapless bra.
Sab had never seen me naked before.
Not even close.
All the years between us. The strong friendship. The way we believed in each other and took care of each other, but always leaving the physical side somewhere in a corner.
Sab inched forward and kissed below my belly button.
My fingertips touched his shoulders as my body felt ready to collapse.
Whiskey and a gorgeous rock star are a deadly combination…
He kissed down to the top of my panties and stopped.
His hands ran up the back of my legs, sending chills scattering through my body.
As his fingers curled around the sides of my panties, he looked up at me again.
“Bree,” he whispered. “I’ve wanted this from the day I met you.”
I nodded.
“I’ve wanted to kiss you. I’ve wanted to taste you. I wanted to share your innocence. I missed so much, babe. I missed so fucking much… but I won’t do that again.”
His hands pulled my panties down as his lips kissed me again.
He inched down and I sucked in a deep breath and let it out slowly.
His lips kissed against my soft skin… down… and…
The tip of his tongue hooked to my slit and pulled with a purpose.
I moved to my toes and gasped.
His hands grabbed my legs again, helping me step out of my panties.
I opened my legs and looked down to see Sab taking me with his mouth.
As his fingers moved up to my ass, pulling me closer to his greedy lips, his tongue swirled around my clit, offering a flirty dance with pleasure and destiny.
I told myself I would instantly fall in love with the man who could make me come with his mouth as fast as Sab was doing…
But there was no way I could fall in love with my best friend.
15
SAB
Her clit was perky, a tender pearl meant for my attention.
I could tell by the way her body jolted that maybe it had been more than a few days or weeks since she felt the way she did right then.
That could have been the whiskey too.
As for me, I knew what I was doing. What I wanted.
Was I drunk?
Of course I was drunk.
But the taste of Bree’s honey on my lips was all I needed to survive any emotion that didn’t involve me being with her.
I moved my right hand to the back of her left leg. I guided it up and over my shoulder.
My lips moved away from her sweet pussy and I looked up at her.
Bree reached down and touched my left shoulder to keep her balance.
“Show me how you want it, babe,” I said.
“Sab…”
“Listen to me,” I growled. “This is your chance. Fuck my mouth, Bree. Give me all that sweetness…”
As I returned my mouth to her slit, she let out a loud groan and her left leg lifted, then smashed against my back.
That made me smile.
Her right leg bent a little and she leaned back an inch or two, offering herself to me even more.
I began to lick her top to bottom.
My tongue splashed in her wetness, moving faster, purposely becoming noisy.
I wanted her to hear what her body was feeling.
Her left heel dug into my back.
Her hips began to rock.
I gave her my tongue, thrusting it into her pussy, her body clenching against me.
She rocked faster and her breaths became louder.
My hands moved up to the small of her back and I spread my fingers wide, letting her know I could keep her standing no matter what.
I kissed to her clit again, my lips slowly closing around and suckling it, waiting for my reward.
A FILTHY Friend (Filthy Line Book 5) Page 12