War of the Posers

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War of the Posers Page 14

by Eric Ugland


  After a bit, Boris came back to me.

  “Cannot wait more,” he said. “Must be moving.”

  “Okay,” I said, and I knelt next to Pomeroy. “Gotta get moving, bub. You up to it?”

  Pomeroy took a deep breath. He sounded pretty ragged. However, he nodded and got to his feet. He wobbled a little, and tilted dangerously towards the slow-moving sewage. I had to snatch at his robes, to pull him back upright.

  “Easy there,” I said.

  He smiled, wanly, and nodded.

  “Boris,” I said, “we’re good to go. Can you get us out of the sewers as fast as possible?”

  Boris nodded enthusiastically. I had the feeling he was more than happy to get out as well.

  We got moving, not quickly, but quietly. Boris, once again, had an unerring sense of direction, taking almost no time at each intersection. Thankfully, this trip through was the shortest. Less than ten minutes, and we were climbing up a long iron ladder before feeling the clean and cold night air of Glaton.

  The heavy manhole cover clanged down against the stone. No one seemed to notice.

  We were on the edge of a small park. Hedges wrapped around the edges, and there was a bandstand of sorts in the center. Lots of grass, a few oak trees, and flowerbeds devoid of flowers. Though, that was to be expected given the time of year. Looking at the buildings around the park, I tried to guess where we were.

  “Where are we?” I asked.

  “Senate,” Pomeroy wheezed, “is. Over. there.”

  “Oh,” I said, looking in the direction he vaguely pointed as if that was going to give me a clue as to where we were. I mean, I knew where the Senate building was, sort of to the northwest of the center of the city. If we went straight south, we’d get home without too much trouble. In theory. “You’re going back to the Enderrun, right professor?”

  Pomeroy nodded.

  I looked over at Shae. And Boris. And New Girl. They were all looking at me.

  “Carriage?” I asked.

  Shrugs.

  “Carriage,” I said. “Follow.”.

  I walked through the park, quickly picked the lock on the gate, and stepped into the street.

  There were a few lights on in the windows around the park, but it seemed pretty clear people were sleeping. As soon as we were all standing on the sidewalk, New Girl smiled.

  “Deadass, you saved me there,” she said. In English. Like, American English. “Do you mind if I tag along with you?”

  “I’m sorry,” I replied in Imperial Common, “are you—“

  “Just a theory,” she replied, switching back seamlessly to Imperial Common.

  “Was that Carchedonian?” Pomeroy said.

  “No, it was, uh,” the New Girl said, a bit flustered now that her ploy didn’t pan out, “it’s a language from far away.”

  “Fascinating.”

  “I just asked if it was okay if I tagged along. I’m a bit new in town.”

  “Seems only fair,” I said.

  Shae raised an eyebrow at me. I thought about pointing out that it wasn’t that long ago when she’d been brand new to our little group, but now did not seem like the time.

  Instead, I just headed down the street.

  We caught a carriage, and took it over to the Enderrun, dropping the professor off in front of his building.

  “It has been quite the adventure this evening,” he said. “And you have given me quite a lot to think about. It may be that I am no longer suited for this sort of work. Perhaps those days have passed, and I should restrict myself to the library.”

  “I don’t think—“ I started, but he waved me off.

  “There is no harm in pointing out the obvious, my young elven friend. I certainly look upon you with a certain envy, knowing you will never face the ravages of aging, at least not in the way we humans are forced to bear our mortality in a slow descent to the grave. And yet, my mind is more powerful than it ever has been. Thank you, young one. This has been one of the greatest evenings of my life. And perhaps,” he leaned in the carriage and met the eyes of Boris, “I might continue meeting with you and yours?”

  “Would like that,” Boris said with a slight nod.

  Pomeroy smiled. “Good night all.”

  Slowly, almost painfully so, he made his way from the carriage up the few steps to the front door, and disappeared inside.

  The carriage driver, a young man with a pinched face, looked at me. “The hells you do to the old man?”

  “Brothel,” I said.

  “Oh?”

  I nodded. “Old Town, if you please.”

  “Your coin.”

  The rest of the carriage ride happened in silence. The four of us sat in the four corners of the carriage, and, I assume at least, all looked out at the passing cityscape, trying to come to grips with not just the night but our lives. It had been an interesting evening, and Pomeroy made a lot of good points in the last little speech of his. I wouldn’t have to face the ravages of aging here, but all the humans around me did. All the humans around me would die before me, and I would have to live with that knowledge. I would almost certainly outlive all of the friends I’d made so far in this world. Maybe the whole elven insanity thing made sense. If you just faced perpetual loss, it might eventually drive you mad. A permanent case of survivor’s guilt.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Back at the compound, which I realized was a more-than-apt name for it, Boris disappeared into his burrow through a doorway I hadn’t realized was there, which connected the lobby of building one to the bakery. That left Shae and New Girl, who both followed me upstairs to my apartment.As I came up the final steps and stood on the landing, I noticed a note nailed to my door.

  It was from Matthew, pointing out that he wouldn’t be able to do any sort of audit of the group’s funds and/or properties if he didn’t have any of the paperwork pointing to the groups funds and/or properties. If I would be so kind as to drop those off in the morning, he would appreciate it. And also, where in the nine hells was I?

  As always, it was written in that kind and paternalist tone that Matthew expressed so well. I felt cuddly and warm.

  I tore the note off the door, but left the nail in place. It’d be a good spot for future notes, and might preclude additional holes in my door I didn’t need. Then I pushed inside.

  Some kind soul had put another bed in my apartment. I hadn’t ever remembered to ask for it.

  I was close to collapsing on the bonus bed, but then I remembered where we’d been that night. It was Shae walking past me that really hit home how terrible we smelled, and suddenly I felt bad that I’d only tipped our carriage driver what I considered to be the minimum amount.

  “Anyone mind if I take the first shower?” Shae asked.

  “You have a shower?” New Girl asked, her already large eyes getting somehow bigger.

  “I do,” I said.

  “It’s his place,” Shae said with a languid gesture in my direction as she continued into the bathroom. The door shut and the shower started up right about the same time.

  I leaned against the wall near the broken window the grimeling had escaped from. I thought about getting it fixed. Seemed like something that needed to happen in the near future.

  “Seems about time we have a little chat,” I said.

  She nodded, and hopped up to sit down on one of the workbenches.

  “Probably a good idea,” she replied. “What do you want to know?”

  “Who are you?” I asked.

  “Lillian Darrington,” she said with a slight bow. “Adventurer and explorer. You are?”

  “Clyde Hatchett,” I said. “Rogue and scallywag.”

  “Scallywag your Choice?”

  “Rogue.”

  “That’s pretty vague — what level are you?”

  “Nine.”

  “Nine and you can throw spells like that?”

  I nodded.

  “Damn, I need to switch over to Rogue. I know wizards that aren’t up t
o you.”

  “It’s a weird situation. I’m actually leaning more toward magic of late.”

  “Seems like a better path for you, considering.”

  “Are you from the Empire?”

  “No.”

  “Where—“

  “Far away.”

  “How about you stick to where you come from in this world?” I asked.

  She raised her eyebrows just a little.

  “What do you mean?” she asked.

  “Just tell me where you came from most recently,” I said.

  “Most recently?” She said looking up at the ceiling. “I came from east of here. South and east. It’s a small kingdom, not super interesting. Looked around for a little while, but there was something nasty happening in the capital. The king and queen retreated into their castle, haven’t been seen in months.”

  “Before then?”

  “I was on a boat. Or a ship. Sailing the seas. Listen, uh, are you, like, someone who is open minded about things?”

  “I’d like to believe so.”

  “Do you believe in, like, multiple worlds? Universes?”

  “Yes.”

  “Oh, then this should be easy. I’m originally from another world.”

  “I know.”

  “Wait--“

  “Speaking English was a bit of a giveaway.”

  “Are you...?” she asked, trailing off.

  I really considered lying. But at the same time, I was dying to talk to someone from home who wasn’t a murderous bastard.

  “New York City,” I said.

  “No shit?”

  “None.”

  “Escondido Beach.”

  “Welcome to Vuldranni.”

  “Are there, I mean, I thought there might be more of us, but—“

  “There are more than I thought there would be, and you have to watch out. Best not to let anyone know you’re, you know—“

  “From out of town?”

  “Exactly.”

  “I don’t really have much to do with others. I’m kind of doing this thing on my own.”

  “What thing is it you’re doing?”

  “Adventure. I came here for adventure, so I’m seeking that out. Exploring. Finding cool shit.”

  “And how long have you been doing that?”

  “About a year? Maybe less. Maybe more. There’ve been some, uh, stretches where I’ve been solo for a loooong time. Kind of warps my view of the calendar.”

  “Makes sense. Where have you gone?”

  “Oh man, I started way far away. Across an ocean. This place called the Shattered Islands. It’s more islands than I’ve ever seen anywhere. And some are tiny, some are pretty huge, all of them are weird as hell. Lots of different clans of pirates there.”

  “Pirates? That sounds cool.”

  “It was kind of cool. Lots of sailing and sword-fighting. Pirate towns full of, well, pirates. But pirates--“

  “Heh.”

  “What?”

  “Butt pirates.”

  “You’re a twelve-year-old.”

  “Now? I don’t know.”

  “And in the old world?”

  “Mid twenties.”

  “No way.”

  “You too?”

  She nodded, then shook her head a little. “Early twenties.”

  “You were a pirate though?”

  “Not really. I didn’t really like the whole steal-everything-from-everyone-all-the-time lifestyle, so I hopped a trade ship out of there. We headed, um, east. The Shattered Islands are all in a big bay, with a small opening out of it where there’s a real city. Like this one, but, you know, more focused on the water. Think Venice on steroids. That’s basically the place in charge of all the pirates and the land everywhere there.”

  “Do the pirates have a leader?”

  “No. It’s more, I guess, that’s the place the pirates are fighting against. That place, Raffles, is heavily regimented. Lots of guards. Lots of soldiers, laws, rules, all that. But most of the people are happy there. I mean, I really thought about staying there. I still think about heading back, because that’s definitely the nicest safest place I’ve ever been. I mean, in this world.”

  “So why don’t you?”

  “It’s draconian. Doesn’t take a whole lot for you to get tossed out of Raffles. If you aren’t a citizen, they won’t put you to death per se, but they push you into the water and won’t let you back up. You have to swim for it. If you are a citizen, you’ll probably spend time in prison or, you know, worse, if you do anything against the rules. And the rules are nearly endless. I got a ten-gold fine for sneezing without covering my nose. It was classified as spitting in public. I hopped on another ship out of there because I wanted adventure, and we went south along the coast before getting to another port city after two months or so. Saw more weird shit, and got on to another ship that was heading across the ocean. I figured that’d be an adventure.”

  “Was it?’

  Her eyes went very wide, and she took a deep slow breath.

  “I hope I never have to do it again,” she said. “There are things out there. Things that are as big as any building I’ve ever seen, things that view even our biggest ships as little toys. There are swarms of nightmare creatures that descend from the skies and devour anything they catch. And there’s so little you can do.”

  “You survived though,” I pointed out.

  “We set out with a crew of three hundred and fifty. We came into port with eight. Now, admittedly, they tell me that’s not normal. That we must have been cursed, and there were a lot of fingers pointed at me--“

  “Couldn’t have been that many — only fourteen hands.”

  “Hah. Yeah, well, I was the only stranger in the group. The first to rejoin. And a blonde. Which to the sailors was bad luck. Or something. I don’t exactly know where that idea comes from, it was never explained to me, mostly because as soon as we were in port, I was shown the door. Or the gangplank.”

  “And then you came west?”

  “I think it’s something from back home. West is where the adventure lies. West is where we had to expand to — it’s where destiny led us. Plus, as soon as I started asking about cool things to see, people told me about the Emerald Sea.”

  “I’ve heard of that place.”

  “I’m going to see it.”

  “I’d like to see it at some point,” I said, “just not yet.”

  “I mean, level nine, I wasn’t doing a whole hell of a lot at level nine. Learning to fight and to sail.”

  “That’s a bit what I’m doing here. Though not quite as much sailing.”

  “I’d imagine.”

  “Wait, Adventurer is your Choice?”

  Lillian nodded. “That’s what I do, who I am.”

  “And how’d you wind up in those ruins?”

  “Mixture of bad luck and too much curiosity.”

  “No one seems to know about them here — I’m just surprised you found them.”

  “You’d be surprised what you can learn by talking to weird old guys in bars. Lots of ‘em are willing to talk to a pretty girl.” She made a kissy face and batted her eyelashes at me. “There’s a whole ton of stories about Glaton. I’ve only been here a few days, but I’m pretty sure there’s still a lot to see and do here. Have you heard of the Shade?”

  “I’ve been there.”

  “Inside?”

  I nodded. “Not a place I’d like to go again. If you want, I can introduce you to the guy I met there. He spent nearly a month inside.”

  “The fuck he did.”

  “True story. But he’s also the highest level anyone I’ve met so far.”

  “What level is he?”

  “Fifty something,” I said. “I think.”

  The shower shut off.

  “Is that your girlfriend?” Lillian asked.

  “Shae?” I asked, looking at the door. “No.”

  “But she lives here?”

  I nodded. “It’s kin
d of a unique situation. I live in this apartment, and I own the building. You probably don’t want to go into the apartment below us, because there’s a mimic inside who’s usually willing to eat first and ask questions later. Below that is a former gladiator and his son, and then there’s a pub on the bottom floor. And I also own the buildings to either side. And the basements are full of kobolds.” I paused because I suddenly wasn’t sure where everyone was living as I seemed to remember we’d been on the cusp or reorganizing, and Shae was supposed to move into her own apartment, and yet—

  “You own this place?” Lillian asked, breaking my reverie

  “I do.”

  “How the hell did you swing that?”

  “More luck than I could ever imagine having back home.”

  “I’ll say.”

  “It’s a good group of people here,” I said. “We’re all working together — we formed a guild. Well, we took over a guild. It used to be a thieves’ guild, but now it’s more like a Robin Hood thing. We’re trying to fix Glaton.”

  “Oh, so, you know, easy things like fixing the largest empire in the world?”

  “I mean, more or less. Given the challenges of that, probably less.”

  Shae came out of the bathroom clad only in a towel.

  Lillian looked over at Shae, and then over at me.

  “Mind if I take a shower next?” Lillian asked. “It’s been a while.”

  “Go ahead,” I said.

  She hopped off the counter and sauntered into the shower.

  “Who is she?” Shae asked as soon as the shower started.

  “An adventurer,” I replied. “From the same world as me.”

  “The same world? Is she, I mean, do we trust her?”

  “I don’t know. Being from the same world as me means nearly nothing. She seems nice, a bit foolhardy, but nice.”

  Shae nodded, then sat down on the bed.

  “Are you going to tell me anything more about yourself?” I asked. “Who you are? Where you come from?”

  “What more would you like to know?”

  “Besides everything?”

  That got a small smile.

 

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