“Childish? Yeah, I suppose I am acting like a child.”
She smiled and breathed in deeply. She exhaled strongly enough to shift the papers on her desk.
“A child burned by flame will become fearful of fire.”
“..if that were true, then all merchants could do is shrivel away in empty rooms.”
Merchants had no choice but to live their lives seeking profits, no matter what harm or deceit they came by. Surely Eve was the embodiment of that philosophy. Wasn’t it proof enough that she was now in a position to determine those who would end up controlling the vital trading port of Gerube? She replied to his angry challenge with a withering sigh.
“I never intended to become a merchant.”
“Ugh.”
Lawrence shrank away, stunned at her feeble voice. She then collapsed on the table as if exhausted, sending pieces of paper flying in every direction. The old man who might be deaf jumped to his feet, but Eve turned to him and smiled.
“It’s a bad joke, isn’t it? Just by playing with paper and uttering a few words we can purchase something that’s worth more than one’s life.”
She took a letter in her hands, and dropped it, slowly turning her gaze toward Lawrence
“Have you ever been betrayed by someone you really trusted? How can anyone trust again after something like that? I can only trust myself now, and my own ability to betray others.”
A beast’s fangs were useful for both offense and defense. Eve kept hers razor sharp. Was it the only way she felt she could defend herself?
“When we had our fight, you asked me didn’t you.. what lies at the end of this drive to quench my constant thirst? And I gave you an answer, didn’t I? What I’m looking forward to..”
She closed her eyes slowly, and then opened them again just as slowly.
“I’m looking forward to a time, someday, when everyone will be satisfied. A world without worry or pain.”
Lawrence could only step back in shock. To constantly betray others, while seeking a life without worry or pain? It was like staring at the darkest recesses of the human spirit. And she wasn’t acting. It wasn’t even a trap. She slowly lifted her body from the table and, as if troubled, leaned back in her chair before calmly continuing.
“Alright. I’ll accept Keeman’s proposal. And you’ll believe what I said.”She paused for a moment, as a snake-like smile spread across her face.“Tell him”Her response was pure genius. How could Lawrence trust those words? How could he possibly report this back to Keeman? He suppressed his feeling of nausea at the endless possibilities and doubts, and slowly straightened his back. But it was her ultimate response, and he had to report it back to him.
“..very well.”He politely bowed before turning to leave the room. He couldn’t help but compare Eve to the many-handed sea-monsters that dragged boats to the bottom of the ocean and gave sailors nightmares. If she couldn’t bring herself to trust anyone, of course she could betray everyone for her own gain.But during a trade there could be no gain without mutual interest.. so who would she end up trusting? Who would end up the loser in this trade? As he placed his hand on the door handle, she struck up a final conversation.“Look, how about you join me?”
She stared at him with an entirely blank expression. She seemed both serious and to want to trick him, at the same time.“You mean, join you as though I’ve been fooled?”“Indeed.”“I don’t want to feel like I’ve been fooled.”
She smiled as he finished talking. He didn’t reply to what she said next.“Look, you have someone waiting for your return, right? But I...”
He didn’t reply: if he had, he would be trapped. Mermaid’s songs were far too good at messing with a man’s mind. He quickly walked down the hallway and went downstairs, all the while feeling as if her eyes were glued to his back.
* * *
The way to contact Keeman was through a messenger. They would meet two streets away from the Stream of Gold, in a busy alley full of stalls. The best place to hide a tree was in a forest. But using such a roundabout method wasn’t just because it would be difficult to meet with Keeman directly; there should be another reason.
He had been strictly ordered to tell Eve only what he was told to say. This was probably to prevent a scenario where she won him over and sent Lawrence back with misinformation. Lawrence had to admit it was a wise choice to play it safe like that. It was impossible for him to accurately relay his conversation with Eve – which parts of their conversation were true, and which were lies? His own trust in people was wavering.“The boss said, ‘understood.”’
The messenger who relayed his message and brought back the reply was a short hunchback.
“Then what are my follow-up orders?”“The negotiations will take a break in a while. You’ll get further instructions then.”
“Understood.”“Alright. I’ll contact you again at the next location we agreed on.”The messenger left immediately; he probably had others to meet with. Keeman had certainly organized things well, but Lawrence still wasn’t sure if it would be enough. The delta was always full of merchants, so wandering outsiders won’t be noticed.. though there are limits for everything.Any merchant wandering around now, or even just looking in a shop’s window, would look suspicious. And the more suspicious one became, the more they would suspect.If Holo was with him, Lawrence would be able to stay calm. But that just meant he was so used to her being at his side that he crumbled whenever she wasn’t around. It brought a twisted smile to his face, as he walked to the next inn he had arranged to meet the messenger at.“My apologies sir, we have no chairs left.”There weren’t many inns on the delta, and almost all of them were booked full. They were all packed today, so that was the kind of response Lawrence had expected to hear. He saw how crowded it was before he went in, realized they would soon run out of wine if they didn’t start diluting it with water.. so he made sure to order stronger wine.He didn’t care if he had to lean against the wall to drink it. In fact if it gave him a better vantage point to overhear the other patrons, all the better. Even if he wasn’t at the meeting it wouldn’t be difficult to learn about it. It just wasn’t something being kept a secret.By the time he received his wine and took a few sips, he grasped nearly the entire situation. The northerners condemned the southerners for stealing their ship. But the southerners hid behind the excuse that they were only fulfilling the wish of the fishermen aboard that ship. It wasn’t the kind of scenario that could lead to a deal, just two sides talking past one another.According to the loudest merchants in the inn, the northerners might leave by midnight and give up on their case to get back the Narwhale. They would probably settle for a share in the profits from it’s sale – and Lawrence agreed with that idea.Should the elders of the south have wished to destroy the northerners, they only had to sell one of them the Narwhale and then, after seizing power and control, threaten them into submission. Since they hadn’t done that, it meant the southerners still hoped to resolve this matter peacefully.
If they wanted to win the reins of control from the landowners, they needed to give them a reasonably beneficial offer - one that would leave the landowners feeling satisfied. The landowners were resisting because they had to retain their fame and power, and so needed enough chips to be able to bargain over the distribution of the gains from the expanding market on the delta.That part of the deal wouldn’t be decided at this meeting, only behind closed doors. The entire process wouldn’t be exposed to Lawrence, and ironically, the people who had full grasp of the situation were the main characters in that farce: Keeman and Eve. Because he was caught between the two of them, Lawrence felt as if the entire situation with the Narwhale was at the center of this mess and, furthermore, that he was the main actor himself. But in reality they were only a small part of the bigger picture.His role was that of a faceless messenger, and all he could do was smile about it. That, and he was under Eve’s control right from the start. Not even drinking could calm him down enough to think about their last meeting. He felt dee
p down how simple it was to just deal with goods and their profits.
If he had lived in this world of risky battles, who knows what kind of a monster he would be. This world was so different; it harbored regrets and admiration. He was incredibly fortunate that Holo wasn’t there to see him now. His bitter smile widened.“Sir.” A voice called to him as he stood there lost in thought, just as his glass of wine touched his lips again. Any merchant who would forget a face or voice wasn’t worthy, especially when it was the distinctive voice of Keeman’s messenger.“You’re quick.”“Of course. Our boss’ job requires quick decisions.”
The messenger’s wrinkled face shifted to make way for a proud smile.It was necessary to have connections to corroborate unreliable information – that’s what merchants were for. And Keeman’s role was to trade with places that took several months to visit by ship. At such distances, there was no way of telling whether gathered information was reliable or not; it was more likely that no information could be gathered in the first place.
In such situations, they had to come to decisions about trading goods of unimaginable value - that took a great deal of resolve. Furthermore, they needed a lot of courage to be able to wait patiently after making the decision, for several months, before the goods arrived.
This was how Keeman had the nerve to devise such a colossal plan to trade the Narwhale for the ownership of the delta and shift the balance of power in the city. And that’s why his messenger would reveal such a proud smile.“Right, here’s your next delivery.”A piece of paper was discreetly slipped into Lawrence’s free hand, as if he had it from the beginning. Even Lawrence was fooled by this; no one around them would have noticed the exchange if they weren’t paying close attention.“..right.”
Lawrence barely replied, to which the man simply nodded and proceeded to vanish. It wasn’t even in an envelope.. were they tempting Lawrence to read it? Or did it no longer matter if he read it or not? But he knew better than to read it, lest Eve find a way to trap him. No matter how sharp her fangs were, she couldn’t chew into a stone. If he knew nothing, he knew nothing that could trap him.There was a huge gulf between having access to information about and actually knowing it, so being conservative was his best option. Before he understood the situation, he should stay quiet and obscure his thoughts. He just had to act natural, despite how difficult that might be. It was only those people who could keep their emotions under control like this who could be merchants.Having remembered this, he also remembered having to tell himself that evil spirits didn’t exist when he was young and had to go outside to relieve himself at night. He followed his instructions and delivered the letter to Eve, waiting for her reply. This time she remained silent, but gave him a look of pity.If he could act naturally in this situation, so could she. So it was impossible for him to know how genuine her expression was. But the messiness of her hair, and the tired wrinkles on her face were certainly honest. There were even more letters on her desk this time around.As he left, he forced himself to clear his mind of the image of her sitting in front of the desk, reading all of those letters on her own. He had Holo’s support, that was true. And Holo’s support was vital for when the situation turned sour, because she could reset the situation to a blank slate.But Eve was alone. She faced this battle without friends, just doubts. She was in a dangerous situation, and if anyone knew she was in league with Keeman, the landowners of the north would surely exact a terrible revenge. Every time he thought about that, he felt his sense of worry for Eve grow. He felt his firm resolve melting away.“What’s wrong?”
As he received Keeman’s next reply from the messenger, he was asked this question.“Nothing.”
Lawrence acted naturally. The messenger didn’t press the issue. But as Lawrence tried to work his way through the crowds to rush to Eve’s hideout, he noticed how close he was to breaking out into a run. He was getting anxious.All he carried were pieces of paper. And all he had to do was carry those papers. He kept repeating this to himself, but it wasn’t helping him settle down. He knew it was no excuse; the messages he was delivering could so easily decide the lives and destinies of many people.
“Please wait a moment.”On his fourth delivery, when Lawrence handed over his letter the door guard - who previously only asked for the password - didn’t let him enter the room. Any kind of torture, if repeated over and over, would become less effective. But with this sudden change, Lawrence became more nervous. As expected, the door guard offered no explanation and just stood still after handing the letter to Eve in the room.
The two guards made no conversation, and didn’t even gesture to one another. Time flew by, the noise of the street seeping into the dead silence in the inn. Eve’s replies were taking longer to pass on to Lawrence, so the contents of the letters were likely starting to get to the real meat of the subject. Eve needed to seriously consider the details before she replied.
There was no correct solution, and in this kind of situation nobody knew, solving a problem related to one’s own destiny - without any external help - was no small task. Lawrence had once been pursued by thieves in a dark forest. Of the two paths he could take, one would lead him to a dead end deep in the forest, and the only way to find out if he had taken that path was to press on. The quill in Eve’s hand now was probably heavier than a chunk of lead.
When the door finally opened, the old deaf-seeming man came out with a letter. He looked Lawrence over and handed the letter to him slowly. The letter was slightly wrinkled and it was soaked in sweat - Eve’s pains and hard work were clear. When Lawrence handed that letter to Keeman’s messenger, he finally received a clue.“The boss is really anxious. ’The current is getting stronger.. we’ll have to prepare some boats and paddles.’ That’s what he says.”Keeman wasn’t just dealing with Eve. The current was probably driven by countless merchants, so he had to hold the rudder firmly. He needed his messengers to be as efficient as possible. Perhaps the reason why, even at this point, the letters weren’t being sealed was because time was too precious and they couldn’t even wait for the wax to set. Lawrence nodded and ran back to Eve.Again the door guard only passed the letter through the door; Lawrence wasn’t able to see Eve, so there was no way he could put pressure on her to hurry. But he knew that even if he tried to do so, he wouldn’t get her responses any faster. She wasn’t stupid. Regardless of what the strategy was, she must have detected the change in mood and realized the consequences.. as well as the consequences of failing to go along with it.
If the current was so fast that even Keeman was getting anxious, then the letters arriving to Eve must have changed accordingly. No matter how his strategy had the potential to overturn the situation, Eve wasn’t in a position to just take this lightly. In fact, secret deals always had to be hidden carefully between everyday dealings. She had to be desperate.
And so Lawrence did his best to act calmly as he waited in the hallway. He kept reminding himself that a good merchant would wait two or three days for the scales to balance for their own profits. However, it was also true that waiting too long meant missing opportunities.
When he finally received her reply from the old man, he instantly bid farewell and sped off. He didn’t even know who’s side he was on. Was he rushing to help Keeman’s plan run smoothly, or buy more time for Eve, or just because he was caught up in the atmosphere? He had no idea.
Keeman’s messenger was beginning to look frazzled, with beads of sweat dotting his forehead. As he waited for him to relay Eve’s reply, Lawrence overheard the latest news about the meeting from some passing merchants speaking with their colleagues at the inn.It appeared that they would come to a conclusion earlier than expected. The moment they came to a consensus, all of Keeman’s hard work would turn to sand. And an opportunity like this wouldn’t knock on his door again.Keeman’s messenger began to press him on the importance of speed, and so Lawrence had to excitingly press Eve’s door guard for her to hurry. But Eve was taking even longer to reply, and her writing was getting harder to d
ecipher. Lawrence lost track of how many times he had relayed letters by running between the inns in this increasing tension.As he was handing another letter to her door guard, he froze. Something felt off this time; he got the distinct impression that something had gone wrong. The door guard blinked at him in surprise, so he smiled.. but his heart was beating furiously. The guard took the letter and went into the room to hand it to Eve.
“...surely not..”
He whispered to himself.. why did she take so long to reply? Keeman had to be at the meeting, so he was surely busier than her. Yet he could decide and reply almost immediately. It wasn’t as simple as a difference in their personalities.. there had to be a real reason. Eve could unhesitatingly draw a knife on someone to achieve her desires. She wasn’t the kind of person who’d tear her hair out hesitatingly and indecisively.
Each time he managed to get a peek into her room, the piles of letters seemed to be growing. There were so many that just reading them all could take a normal person their entire life. But he was overlooking something serious - something fundamental. He was being forced to wait for a long time in that hallway on every visit. Had he seen anyone else? Had anyone else actually brought a letter to the room?
By the time he finally received her reply, after what seemed like an eternity, it felt like the storm that had raged in his head had finally calmed. He was finally able to calmly analyze the situation. As the old man emerged from the room, he once again spotted all the letters on the floor. But, he only had to think in simple terms: why was she casting them onto the floor after reading them? What was her aim?Lawrence put the letter in his pocket and left the inn in a hurry. Right from the start, there was something incomprehensible about the premise for the current dealings. The oddest thing was the fact that Eve was being childish and saying had she had to win all of the profit. Despite that, the discussions he had with her and the atmosphere in her room made him accept her childish remarks.
Spice & Wolf IX (DWT) Page 9