Vivian's List (Vol. 1)
Page 9
It was some time before Vivian was able to stop quivering.
I sat up and gathered her soft and pliant body into my arms, holding her in the silence, waiting until her breaths came in shallow succession.
Gently, I turned her chin so she had no choice but to face me.
I saw tears trapped in her lashes.
“Viv,” I whispered, pressing my lips to her dampened eyelids. “You okay?”
She nodded, biting down on those luscious red lips. “Did I?”
I stole a quick kiss. “You did.”
“Liam?” she murmured softly, gazing into my eyes.
“Yeah?” I prompted.
Her voice took on a coy inflection. “I really like this armchair. It was money well spent.”
Chapter Eleven
Vivian
I waited for apprehension to fill me. It didn’t.
I waited for regret to fill me. It didn’t.
The pleasure I’d felt was so acute, so intense, so new to me, and so overwhelming.
I felt weak in his arms, and for a little while we didn’t move from the leather armchair. Breathing heavily, we traded the same air back and forth between us as we watched the subtle shifts of the flickering candlelight play across the ceiling.
Me—buck naked, and Liam—fully clothed.
So not fair.
Liam bent his head and pressed a tender kiss to the valley between my breasts.
A bittersweet tingle remained between my thighs where his tongue had loved me with such mouthwatering adoration. Liam was not a man who believed in rushing his pleasures.
Sweet and tender, he’d taken his time with me until I was lost in the raw moments of passion—blissful, all-consuming passion—rather than my nerves.
Sated and contented, I breathed out a soft sigh.
Gazing into my eyes, Liam tucked an errant strand of hair behind my ear, his fingers strong and yet so gentle against my skin.
“Thank you,” I said, feeling a rush of emotion.
He didn’t answer. Instead, he pulled me onto his lap and wrapped his arms around my waist, gathering me close.
Smiling, I relaxed and curled into him, letting his body heat seep through my skin and warm me inside and out.
A sense of peace and rightness settled over me.
He studied me for an intense second and his voice was hesitant when he spoke. “Was it good for you?”
I felt the heat of a blush scorch my cheeks. “I had no idea it would feel like ... like that.”
“Like what?” he asked, running his hands down my hips and over my thighs.
I closed my eyes and my voice was dreamy when I spoke. “Feel so … so loved.”
When I opened my eyes, Liam held my gaze. Warmth transferred between us along with a reminder of just how intimate we’d been on this leather armchair.
He dropped a kiss on the bridge of my nose. “Good,” he said. “I wanted to make you feel loved.”
My heart swelled in my chest at his words.
He wanted to make me feel loved.
I couldn’t remember Brody ever wanting to do that for me. His needs had always come first, a pattern that continued on into the bedroom.
It was so different with Liam. He had made me feel alive in a way I’d never felt before.
He gave me the wonderful freedom to want, to ask, to feel, and I allowed myself to let go of all my inhibitions.
Now I realized my body ached for that kind of openness, for that lack of restraint that was satisfying just in its existence.
Never had I felt more desired, but more than the physical need, Liam had shown me that he cared for me. Deeply.
With every soft kiss, with every gentle stroke, with every caressing look, he’d made me feel so loved, so cocooned in such delicious warmth.
And when he had loved my body with his hands and with his mouth, he loved so intimately, so thoroughly that my body was left weeping from the depth of pleasure.
Leaning forward, Liam cupped my chin and kissed me fully, a long, deep and leisurely kiss that made a quiver start from the top of my spine and go all the way down to my toes.
The denim of his jeans chafed against my thighs and my hips seemed to move on their own accord, rubbing firmly against his hard, rigid length.
With a strangled groan, Liam broke the kiss. “I need a cold shower right now.”
As he shifted his weight, I found myself gazing down at his sizeable bulge, his desire obvious despite the barrier of clothes.
“Whoa!” I teased, my eyes fixed on his substantial erection. “Stand down, soldier.”
His muscled chest moved in a silent chuckle and I felt the vibrations straight through my body. “My soldier salutes you, Viv.”
I laughed, too, barely able to contain myself. But the humor slowly slipped from my expression as Liam pinned me with his hot stare.
His eyes darkened with heat and intent, and a heavy beat of sensual awareness pulsed between us.
I’d never felt more aware of a man or his interest in me as a woman.
“Would you like to join me?” The corners of his mouth lifted into a half smile. “You could cross another item off your list.”
“I just had a shower earlier tonight.” I leaned forward and brushed a soft kiss against his lips. “But I’d love a warm bath.”
The bathtub was barely large enough for one person. Liam eased himself down into the steaming hot water, and reached for me. Gingerly, I stepped into the porcelain tub and he guided me so I sat straddled between his legs, facing away from him.
The water lapped over my breasts as I leaned back against his chest.
Liam encircled me in the strength of his arms and I closed my eyes, releasing a hitched breath as the warm water sluiced across my body.
The temperature was perfect and the warmth melted away any lingering anxieties.
Liam grabbed a soap bar from a little dish in the corner of the tub and slid it unhurriedly across my neck, rubbing it over my shoulders, down my arms, and over my back.
A soft whimper slipped past my lips as his hands came around to soap my breasts.
He ran his slippery hands over my tits in slow, hypnotizing circles, lathering them up with soap.
It was slow. Sensual. Unimaginably erotic.
The moist air left me drowsy. My lips parted and I watched his movements through half-closed eyelids as if in a dream, mesmerized by the sight of his soapy hands shaping my breasts, teasing my nipples, rolling them under his fingers until they came to taut, aching peaks.
Soapsuds tingled over my distended nipples.
He rained hot kisses over my neck while he traced his fingertips across the soap bubbles covering my breasts, circling around and around my swollen areolas.
Then he pinched my pebbled nipples, wrenching a cry from deep in my throat.
His rigid erection pressed against my lower back and I felt the strength of his wanting.
“Viv,” he groaned deep and low, his voice curling my insides. “You feel wonderful. So soft. So smooth.”
Unable to hold back, I raised my arms and laced my fingers behind his neck.
My glistening breasts jutted forward and he filled his palms with my breasts, lathering me up, running his wet soapy hands over my aroused flesh, brushing his thumbs over the stiff peaks of my nipples.
Warm water swished between my thighs. Instinctively, I moved my legs apart, sighing with pleasure as he continued massaging my water-slicked breasts, working them to a deep lather.
Closing my eyes at the swirling sensations, I eased my body closer to his and inhaled his potent male scent.
He smelled of soap and sex and my desire to lose myself in him grew even stronger.
More swishing water caressed my sex and I opened my eyes, watching as he splayed his hand across my stomach, then moved his palm downward, pushing the bar of soap under the water.
My head rolled back and I moaned with pleasure as he began massaging the soap at the juncture between my thighs, rub
bing it against my clit until the bathwater was white with soapsuds.
Suddenly the soap slipped from his grip, landing with a clunk at the bottom of the tub.
I whimpered at the loss but quickly recovered when Liam started working his fingers, caressing me, tracing the folds of my labia, slowly inserting one finger into my damp heat, then another, and another until I felt stretched and full.
I let out another breathy moan, clamping my sex around his fingers.
Liam pressed a soft kiss to my earlobe. “Take my hand,” he rasped. “Touch yourself, Viv. Guide me.”
Sighing at the calm assurance in his voice, I let my hand skim lower, slicing the surface of the water.
A startled gasp escaped my lips as Liam caught my hand under the water and pressed it firmly against my sex.
With his strong hand clasped over mine, I began stroking my fingers over my throbbing vulva, sliding through my wetness.
Liam began to stroke, too, his skillful fingers matching me move for move … stroke for stroke.
Warm water swished between my thighs.
Slowly, I slipped a finger into my damp heat until it disappeared inside my drenched folds.
Liam’s hand paused for a beat, then I felt him slide the length of his finger inside me as his callused thumb massaged my clit.
Buried inside my pussy, our fingers joined and I guided him to that sweet, sensitive spot.
When at last he found it, I gasped at the staggering sensation, pressing my sex harder against his finger.
Together, our fingers worked in tandem, quickening in tempo, pumping harder and harder.
The warm water swirled and swished, created a pulling friction.
A sweet ache built inside me, gaining in pressure. I closed my eyes again, fighting to keep control, not wanting the intense pleasure to stop.
The lapping of warm water between my thighs, the feel of his rigid cock nudging against my lower back, one hand fondling my breasts, lifting and kneading all while his other hand continued its sweet torment, his fingers joining mine, pumping harder against my heat, coaxing me, chasing that pleasure round and round … I didn’t think I could take any more.
More swishing water caressed my sex.
All the sensations flooding me, filling me … it almost became too much.
I felt like I was being pulled from all sides. “Liam.” I choked on a sob. “I ... I …”
Ignoring my pleas, he squeezed my nipple between his thumb and forefinger and slid two fingers inside my folds, quickening his movements, pumping harder and harder until my muscles contracted and my hips bucked against his hand as the pleasure tore violently through me, drowning me in bliss.
I came fast and hard, wave after wave of multiple orgasms.
Every breath that left my mouth sounded like a sob.
Still Liam’s fingers continued stroking my clit, teasing and taunting the swollen bud as if trying to extract the final few tremors from me.
I came again and again, wave after wave slowly rippling through me.
Encircled in his arms, he feathered sweet kisses on my neck, my hair, my shoulders until the ebbing waves of pleasure gradually subsided.
Chapter Twelve
Liam
Damn. I ran a shaking hand through my hair. Never had I felt so turned on, so totally aroused by a woman’s orgasm. My cock throbbed in my jeans, pulsing painfully against the restraint of my zipper.
I felt this need, this compulsion to do it over and over and over again.
Make her come against my tongue. Make her come on my hand.
I wanted to bury my cock deep inside her tight little pussy and make her come inside me.
The realization gave me pause.
I was her guardian. I was like a … a brother to her.
A tight muscle pulled at my jaw.
Hell, who was I kidding?
I didn’t want to be anything close to a brother to Viv.
I dragged a hand down my face and tried to master my breathing.
I wanted …
I wanted …
Fuck. I didn’t even know what I wanted anymore.
I stepped out onto the deck and walked up to the weathered railing.
The moon was full and so bright that it swallowed up the night sky.
A stark contrast to my dark and muddled mind.
I placed a cigarette between my lips, reached for my lighter, flicked the wheel and lit it.
My hands shook in the glimmer from the Zippo lighter.
I took a deep drag. Exhaled.
The smoke curled around my trembling hands close to my lips.
Again, my thoughts went to Viv and emotion caught in my throat, prickly and raw.
I shook my head as if I could just shake off the emotion.
Did it help?
Not remotely.
I took another deep drag on my cigarette and exhaled until my lungs were empty.
I tried again.
I wanted … I wanted Vivian’s trust.
I wanted to protect her, make her feel safe.
I wanted to blot out all the pain Brody had inflicted upon her.
I wanted to give her everything she’d been missing in her relationship with Brody—the feeling of security, contentment, and acceptance.
All things she had always unknowingly given to me.
I wanted to make her feel special and let her know she was wanted, needed and desired in so many different ways.
I wanted to make her feel loved.
I wanted her in a way that surpassed sexual need.
I wanted … I wanted her.
Damn. Damn. Damn. I was so fucked.
My own words had come back to bite me. Even though I’d said thing between us, that it’d only be about sex, subconsciously I knew I was only kidding myself.
I couldn’t do it to Viv. I couldn’t make love to her without love.
Sex without intimacy was an empty experience. And she already had that with Brody.
I knew Viv well enough to know that she was a woman who needed not just sex, but intimacy, too, and trust in order to give herself up. To let herself go.
Taking another drag, I leaned my elbows on the railing. By now the tip of my cigarette had wormed back and I lightly tapped it, letting the ashes fall over the deck.
No strings attached sex between friends. No emotions. No expectations. Everything goes back to normal when the sun comes up—that was all just an urban myth.
How had I ever thought things would go back to normal?
Now I was terrified of what was springing up between us.
I took in a deep drag and blew it out slowly, but the action did nothing to calm me.
Though I’d tried to wall off my emotions where Vivian was concerned, I’d failed on all counts.
A boundary had been crossed. And whether I liked it or not, there was no going back.
I glanced at my watch. Mom was expecting me. I took a last drag, stubbed out my cigarette and strode back into the house.
In the privacy of my room, I sat down in front of my desk, fired up the computer, and pulled up Skype.
It always felt good to see my mom, to hear her lilting voice and her infectious laughter.
We talked and laughed about everything and nothing until I fell asleep at the desk with the computer monitor still turned on.
Chapter Thirteen
Vivian
“What?” I asked, tying my hair up in an artfully messy ponytail. “What?”
“You had sex with Liam, didn’t you?” Chelsea stated. Actually, it sounded more like an accusation.
“Me?” I grinned, genuinely trying to look innocent but genuinely unable to pull it off. “No.”
“Oh, snap!” Her stride hitched. “I knew it!” she exclaimed, resuming her pace. “You lucky bitch! How? When? Where?”
I shrugged, weaving my way onto the boardwalk. It was a gorgeous day and it wasn’t tourist season yet so I was able to enjoy Pacific Beach without the choking crowds.
“Yeah, about that night.” I frowned. “What the hell did you do that for, Chels?”
“Hey, I was doing both of you a favor. I’ve seen the way you look at him. The way he looks at you.”
“Oh, yeah?” I asked, striving for a bored tone. “And how exactly does he look at me?”
“Like you’re good enough to eat.”
“Pssh!” I blew out a puff of air. “As if.”
“Bitch, please!” Chelsea rolled her eyes and sent me one of her many bitch-please looks. “You know it’s true. I’ve always envied how he treats you … like you are the reason for his breathing.”
“Sure.” My voice dripped with sarcasm.
Chelsea’s green eyes studied me as if she could read my mind. I could even hear the cogs turning in her brain. “You’re falling for him, aren’t you?”
“I’m not falling for Liam.” My words came automatically, followed by my heart’s immediate denial.
“You are, too. When Liam is around you smile more, and your laughter is easy … more carefree.”
I allowed myself a tiny smile. In truth, Liam hadn’t been far from my mind all day.
His warm presence lent me a shoulder I hadn’t realized I needed, and the tender way he’d made love to me came back to me at odd, vulnerable moments of the day.
Like right now …
“So.” Chelsea nudged me in the ribs. “Sex with Liam, was it mind-blowing? Orgasmic?”
Needing to escape her meddling gaze, I took a moment to study the azure blue sky and diaphanous clouds. “What’s an orgasm supposed to feel like anyway?” I asked, changing the subject.
“Hmmm.” Chelsea paused, seemingly giving my question some thought. “For me, it’s sort of like filling a glass of water until it overflows.” She pursed her lips. “It’s kind of like melting and exploding all at the same time. I can’t focus on anything. I lose myself. And once it’s over, I’m a noodle.”