And my heart wouldn’t be crushed when he left. So why did it feel like I was giving up my needs just like he’d given up his football career?
5
Kyle
I awoke the next day at zero six hundred, and for a second I thought seeing Sara had been a dream. Once I came to, I hurriedly got dressed. Pat and Vic were already waiting for me. The rest of the guys on my Team were beginning their day as well.
Pat slapped me on the back. “So, you want me to distract, maybe kick up a sandstorm, so you can get some alone time together?” My boys always had my six.
“Sounds like a plan. How’s Annie?” Communication here was limited, so Pat had to deal with hearing news late sometimes. There were so many dudes here that all of them wanted a piece of the action. Thank goodness for the communication hall, even if our allowed time did suck ass.
“Good. No longer having morning sickness. At least that’s what she told me last time we were able to talk. We find out the baby’s gender on Friday. I’m excited to find out, man. But I’m sure it’s a boy.”
Vic cackled. “In your dreams, Walsh. It’s a girl, and you know it.”
Had to hand it to Vic—he was probably right. All Team guys ended up with girls. Frogman’s curse. Something about our balls being frozen in the cold water made our sperm only shoot out X’s. One of our buddies had six daughters. Six! That was a Team in itself. But I’d show these fools how it was done. When I decided to have children, I’d take a month of leave and head to Hawaii first. Warm that shit up.
I glanced at the schedule: Two meet and greets with the football players, performance from the cheerleaders, and autographs. There were hundreds of soldiers here, so the shows would be split in two. I’d be attending the first show. Then tomorrow they’d be transferred to the next base and repeat the same routine. They’d only return here on select nights till they left.
We skipped the football player meet and greet—been there, done that. But no way in hell was I going to miss Sara dancing for me.
I dragged Vic and Kyle early to the auditorium. American flags adorned the concrete walls, and plastic fold-up chairs filled the floor. I needed a good seat. Within minutes, the hall was filled with sailors, SEALs, and Marines.
After a cheesy introduction by some nameless comedian, the girls took the stage. I only had eyes for one. Sweet Jesus, Sara was fine. She came out in cutoff daisy dukes, a red tank top, and blue cowboy boots. It wasn’t the typical white shorts the dancers normally wore but I’d take it. She discreetly blew a kiss in my direction. Any guy who may have seen it probably sported an instant hard-on. Yeah. She had that much pull.
The lights dimmed, and the unmistakable guitar riffs of AC/DC’s classic “You Shook Me All Night Long” began. Her eyes glued on me, Sara twirled her hips, whipping her hair back and forth. It was as if she was my own personal dancer. And every time her eyes glossed over with need, I pictured her face when I’d made her come. She’d sported the same intoxicating expression. Her movements were perfectly in sync with her squad, but Sara stood out. The curves of her body, the precision of her steps, the warmth radiating from her smile. I’d seen tons of dancers in my time, on and off the pole, but Sara was in a class of her own. The audience was mesmerized. I closed my eyes for a second, imagining we were back in the club in San Diego, and she was dancing only for me—not for a room full of horny men.
The song ended, and the roars from the claps echoed throughout the room. Maya grabbed the microphone. “Hi, everyone. As captain of the Sparks, on behalf of the San Diego Wildfires and ourselves, I want to thank you for inviting us here to perform for you all. It’s truly an honor for everyone on the squad to be entertaining our heroes.”
The audience clapped as Sara took the microphone next. And the guys grew louder when she winked. “Hello, everyone. I’m Sara. For this next number, we’re looking for three volunteers.” Her gaze turned to me, and my hand popped up in the air, like some involuntary response.
Of course, she chose me. By the way she was just eye-fucking the shit out of me, it wasn’t even a question. And then two other men were chosen, a Marine and sailor. She ran off the stage, emerging a minute later dressed as a sexy Santa.
Another cheerleader pulled out three chairs and motioned toward me and the two other men to sit. Score, I’d be getting some sort of a private dance after all. Just a very public one. One where I couldn’t touch her like I wanted.
Each guy had a cheerleader by their side. Then the song “Santa Baby” started playing. Modernly sang, it was the Taylor Swift version, and not my favorite rendition by Eartha Kitt. I had more memories associated with the original. But since Sara danced around me, waving some feathery boa in my face, I didn’t give a fuck who sang. As long as I had a good view of her ass, Humpty Dumpty could be playing. I’d get down with nursery rhymes. Fuck it.
I relaxed into the chair, thoroughly enjoying my PG lap dance. Pat and Vic were laughing their asses off at me. Fuck them, this dance was the closest any of us got to getting laid since we’d arrived. Those two could go jerk off in their racks later tonight, alone. I was going to get some pussy.
The song ended too soon and Sara kissed me on the cheek. So did the other two shitheads picked. I’d take what I could get for now but would arrange something for later tonight.
When I thought no one was looking, I whispered in her ear, “Leave your window open.”
Momentarily, she froze. Her upper lip quivered, but she was a good actress. She gave me a friendly hug, and shooed me off the stage.
Back in the audience with Pat and Vic, I formulated a plan. All I needed was the top of an empty bunker, a sleeping bag, and her willing body. It was going to be a banging night. In more ways than one.
6
Sara
Finally, a computer. With Internet.
Following our hour-long show, I was exhausted. Afterward, we did autographs and were shown around the place a bit. We practiced for our next show and now, here I was. I really wanted to soak in a bathtub, maybe with some Epsom Salt. But warm baths were one of the many luxuries that would have to wait till I returned home.
I had a small break before dinner and then another meet and greet. All my girls were checking their emails or Facebook on the computers in the communication hall. I however, had more important things to research. I picked a spot in the back and got to work.
“Kyle Lawson football.”
Articles popped up. Terrell Kyle Lawson. So Kyle was his middle name—seemed like a clandestine SEAL maneuver. I clicked on the Wiki link.
Terrell Kyle Lawson is an American football player who left his professional career and became an officer in the United States Navy. He turned down a five-year, 9.6 million dollar contract with the Oakland Marauders. Popularly known by his initials, T.K., Lawson is as renowned for his refusal to grant any media interviews as he is for his talent on the field.
He gave up 9.6 million dollars?! I knew he was special. To some, that action would seem like he ripped up a winning lottery ticket.
Article after article rehashed the same story with no new insight, mainly because Kyle had refused all media interviews. Which made perfect sense because anonymity was important to be a member of the SEALs. Despite all the recent SEAL memoirs, SEALs were supposed to be silent operators. That much even I knew.
Maya pulled her chair next to mine. “I can’t believe he’s the same guy we met at Green Flash Bar & Grill. That’s crazy. His boy Vic is fine as hell with his insane body and never-ending tats—thank God I didn’t hook up with him though. I remember that night I just thought both of them were players. I would never date a SEAL. And neither should you.”
I rolled my eyes at her. “It’s totally fate—we were meant to see each other again. I honestly believe that. Yes, he may be cocky. But there’s more to him than that.” I pointed to the screen. “Case in point. Check this out. Did you know he turned down a 9.6-million dollar contract to become a SEAL?”
She studied the computer screen,
and crinkled her face. “That’s pretty stupid if you ask me. I mean, think of all the good he could do with that money. There’s no law that says you have to blow it on mansions, a Maserati, or frivolous bullshit, Sara. He could’ve saved a ton of homeless dogs or donated to a women’s shelter.” I knew she was right, but his decision did not lose its luster in my eyes. It was still humble.
“All good points. But he told me at his place that he wanted to live his life with a purpose. And this is the path he chose. I have to respect it. Plus, it’s totally hot.”
She twirled her hair, giving me a vacant stare. “First off, that’s a line. One that you fell for. You’re always trying to give people the benefit of the doubt. And secondly, even if he meant it, it’s stupid, not hot. Do you know how dangerous his job is? Sounds like he’s chasing a high. He’s an adrenaline junky. Seriously, Sara, you know these SEALs. All the ones I’ve met are cheaters. One girl on our squad dated one and he cheated on her with a stripper. A stripper! You need to stay far away from him. Did you forget he fucked you seven ways to Sunday and never called you? You know that every chick in San Diego drops their panties at the first sign of a SEAL. You don’t need to deal with that shit. You’re beautiful, smart, love kids, are a professional cheerleader, and have a career ahead of you as a teacher. I mean you work part time at a preschool. I thought you wanted to get married in a couple of years and have a family? Kyle’s not the type to settle down. You can get any guy you want. Don’t waste your time on a player.” Jesus. She needed to take a breath. She sounded so judgmental right now. Just knowing the girls she knew boasted about being with SEALs told me those girls were with attention seekers too. Most SEALs never spoke about their careers. Did she ever think of that? Okay, so he wasn’t perfect. Who was? Definitely not me. Then again, I’d known Maya for way too long. The rant she just unloaded on me came from a good place. And she wasn’t wrong about the things I wanted.
I nodded my head in agreement, forcing my heart to listen, but it refused. Fine, he was a player, but every player can be tamed for the right woman, right? And I didn’t blame him for not calling me, after all—we hadn’t exactly started our relationship out on the right foot. I was equally at fault. It was exhausting going back and forth on what he represented to me and what I wanted out of us hooking up. Emotional whiplash was a real bitch.
Maya clutched my arm. “Aye, Sara, seriously. No. Forget about him. I don’t care that he fucked you like a porn star. He’ll never be faithful to you. A SEAL and a baller? It’s the worst combination. He probably gets more pussy than an animal shelter.”
“Nice, Maya,” I groaned.
She kept going. “Not to mention you’re on a USO tour. If you sneak away to hook up with him, you’ll get kicked off the squad. Did I ever tell you about Emma? She was on the squad a few years ago. Well she was caught blowing the bassist for Möxie Cörps. They flew her ass home, made her turn in her poms, and even the website erased any trace of her. You can’t get anything past Denise. She’s like a hawk. Take it from your captain. If she finds out, you’re as good as gone. All you ever wanted was to be a cheerleader, and you worked so hard. Don’t throw it away on this guy’s jock.” Damn it.
“You’re right.”
Maya pursed her lips, and shook her head. She knew me well enough to know I was already fixated on Kyle. But she didn’t need to sound so matter of fact about it. What the hell? Was I destined to be alone? What was wrong with having a good time? I could handle this. I turned back to the computer. At least she stopped the nagging, stood up, and left.
I closed out the articles on Kyle and logged into my Facebook, reading my messages. My mom worried about me being overseas, and my friends back home wanted to know if I’d met any sexy male celebrities on the tour. Yes, there were some hot movie stars on the USO tour, but none of them were worth mentioning at all. I only had eyes for Kyle.
7
Kyle
As an officer of SEAL Team Seven, I planned our missions. The logistics, the equipment, the operations, every detail. I didn’t take a vote, I made the final decisions. Tonight, I was planning an important operation—Operation Rapunzel.
With her now long blonde hair, the name fit her to a T. After handing out assignments, I ditched Pat and Vic, and went to Sara’s room. My guys were trained well enough; little instructions were needed. I needed to see her before she left on the convoy. With any luck, she’d be waiting for me.
Luckily, she followed my instructions; her window was open. And it was dark. This was too easy. I climbed into the opening, careful not to wake her fellow cheerleaders or the virgin patrol mistress in the adjacent rooms.
Sara was curled up on her bed, her hair wild, her eyelids closed. The day’s events had definitely taken a toll on her. She wore a pink tank top with no bra and white pajama bottoms. I stared at her from the window. Her nipples were erect, and I wanted to suck them until she screamed my name.
I continued to stare around the room and at the walls: barren, white, thin. Nothing could happen in here. I didn’t want to waste any time. In two quick strides, I was at the bed. I bent and kissed her, gently rousing her from her sleep.
She rubbed her eyes and stretched her back. And I placed my finger over her lips, urging her to stay quiet.
Before she knew what was happening, I scooped her into my arms and smuggled her out of her room. She was so light; my seabag was heavier than her.
I snuck her behind the barracks, across our communications building, to a row of empty bunkers. She kept silent, and clung to my chest, waiting to see what I’d do next.
I placed a finger to my lips again and motioned for her to climb up the stairs to the top of the bunker. Her eyes grew to the size of saucers, and I chuckled softly. “I’ve got you.” It was quite comical that at six-feet-five and two-hundred fifty pounds she thought I would possibly let her fall. Still, she hesitated at first, but began her ascent, as I followed closely under her, my face just inches from her round ass.
Once up top, I pulled a thick sleeping bag out of my backpack, threw it down, and pulled Sara close to me. “I’m a regular Boy Scout,” I laughed, and she grinned, showing me a shy smile.
“Wow, how’d you know about this spot? Better yet, how many ladies have you brought up here?”
“Just you, sweetheart. But this is known internally as the hookup bunker. It’s far enough away from the barracks and watch spots to be inconspicuous. Occasionally I come up here to relax or pray, but I do that alone. It’s hard to find any peace here.”
Her head tilted in a thoughtful way. “Pray? Are you religious?”
“Yes, ma’am. Son of a preacher man. After my dad left the Corps, he became a man of God. What about you?” It was nice finding out more about her.
“I’m Southern Baptist. But I haven’t gone to church since I was in high school,” she admitted, her eyes downcast.
I moved a lock of hair out of her face, bringing her head back up so she could meet my eyes. “It’s okay that you haven’t gone in a while. Personally, I lost my way when I was playing ball.” My cheeks burned, a physical reminder of my shame. It was harder to take your own advice than to dish it out. “The women, the money, the drugs, shit, the lifestyle. I’m no saint, but seeing so much life and death really makes you want to believe in something bigger than yourself.”
Her lips widened into a smile, and she snuggled on my chest. She fit perfectly. There was an ease in talking to her that I hadn’t had with another woman in years. It felt like I’d known her forever. She didn’t make me feel like half the prick I really was. As if she saw the good in me even if sometimes I couldn’t see it myself.
Leaning in, I gave her a chaste kiss. There was no urgency behind it; I just wanted to be close to her, share the moment with her by my side. It was one hell of a scene. I took in the moonlit sky. Its many stars. The rarely quiet Afghani mountains. No commotions. Just quiet. Just us.
“So, what’s your deal? Why don’t you have a man?”
I was only
teasing her, but she looked away from me. She did that often. As if she doubted herself a lot. Or somewhere down the line, she was told she was a disappointment and she believed it. Didn’t know why. I thought she was pretty damned cool. Whomever made her feel that way was a fucking imbecile. It was sobering to see we all had our hang-ups. We carried that extra weight on our backs as validation, trudging through life without justification, just feeding off of the bullshit we were fed.
“Oh, I don’t know,” she began, “it’s nothing dramatic. I’ve been so focused on practicing once I made the squad that I didn’t have time to date. I go to school full time, so a lot of my time is spent studying. Work mornings at a preschool, I dance, and work out the rest of the time.” She continued to talk but stayed looking away. “I had a boyfriend my first two years in college, but he was a bit controlling, didn’t want me to try out. I guess he was afraid I’d leave him or get hit on. He left me when I made the squad. So after we broke up, I didn’t want to date another guy who would be against my dreams.”
“Sara?”
“Yeah?”
“Look at me, sweetheart. I’d like to see your face while we’re talking.” She tilted her face in my direction. “Much better.”
She let out a calmed breath, and wet her lips. “What about you? A Navy SEAL and a former football player? You must have women throwing themselves at you.”
I laughed. There was my girl. “I’m not gonna lie, I’ve had my share. But once they found out I played ball, they only saw dollar signs.” Her nose scrunched at the comment. “I had a girlfriend for a bit when I was playing, but once I told her I wanted to leave football and join the Teams, she bailed. So I’ll be real with you, Sara. You’re gorgeous, a sweetheart, smart, and I’m glad you’re here, but I’m not looking for anything serious. It’s nothing personal. This job just has a way of destroying relationships. It wouldn’t be fair to get involved with you when I’m deployed nine months out of the year. I don’t want to lead you on.”
Invaluable (The Trident Code Book 2) Page 4