by K. B. Webb
We had yet to label what was going on between us, but his Facebook profile picture was one of him and I that Wynee had taken at Ricky’s. I was leaning into him with my arms wrapped around his neck, looking up at him smiling, and he had his arms wrapped around my waist staring at me with an expression that mirrored mine. I had seen the comments and saw that his friends from New Orleans all wanted to know who I was. Logan always responded that I was “his girl”, but we weren’t “Facebook official” and he had never asked me to be his girlfriend. I was letting things play out at the pace he set, because I really had no fucking clue what I was doing. I just knew that when girls hit on him at Ricky’s, I wanted to drag them away from him by their hair, but I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to do that. He never flirted back though. He always brushed them off or just ignored them completely. Just like he had done with Tiffany many nights before she was fired from Ricky’s.
Tiffany. I still saw red whenever I spoke her name. We had never been friends. Hell, we had never really liked each other, but sleeping with a man who lives with his girlfriend and child was just too fucked up for me to handle. Geo had fired her the night everything went down with Brian. I had explained to him that he didn’t have to do that. I was an adult. I could suck it up, work with her, and never start a fight. But Geo, being the amazing guy he was, said he would never want to put me in a position like that. He also brought up the fact that Tiffany didn’t really do a damn thing anyway besides flirt with customers and drink on the job. Dani had started picking up more shifts to help us, which was great because Wynee and I actually got along with her.
Dani was a gorgeous girl. She was shorter than me with an amazing body, gorgeous natural red hair that was down to the middle of her back, and a killer personality. It also didn’t hurt that she had a rocking body. She was toned, but her ass in particular was phenomenal. I was totally straight, but there was no denying the fact that Dani’s ass brought her more tips than her bartending skills, because every man that met her noticed it. The main man being Lucas. I had tried to force her to tell me what was going on with them, but she had locked that secret in the vault and wasn’t letting it out anytime soon. All she would say was that they were more than friends but it was complicated. I’d really gained a lot of respect for Dani the weekend after my public showdown with Tiffany.
I walked into work that night and put my purse in my locker like I always did. Dani walked in and looked at me with sad eyes. She had been looking at me like that for days and I knew that look; it was pity, and I didn’t want anyone’s pity.
“Cut the shit, Dani. I’m fine. You don’t need to keep looking at me like that.”
“It’s not that, Molly. I just, I need to tell you something, and I’m scared of how you’re going to take it.” She looked down at the ground and started pulling at the end of her Ricky’s t-shirt.
“Dani, I don’t know what you have to say that you think is so bad, but I promise it won’t change anything between us. I don’t usually let people in, and I’ve let you in. So I promise whatever it is, I’ll be fine.” I gave her a smile and leaned against my locker.
“Okay, well, here it goes. I saw how things went with Tiffany the other night, how you handled it, how much hate you had in your eyes for her, which she totally deserved. But if you’re going to be my friend, then you need to know that I am no better than Tiffany. I slept with a married man, a very high profile one at that. He didn’t have kids with his wife, but she was still his wife, and I knew about her. She however, didn’t know about me, well didn’t then. Once she found out, she was livid. She made my life a living hell and I deserved every second of it.”
“What happened with you and the guy?” I wasn’t angry with her, not even a little. Every situation was different and I was in no position to judge someone else’s life. I felt sorry for her. She looked so lost and broken when she spoke about it. I was really starting to consider Dani a friend, and I wanted to help her in any way I could.
“Well, his wife gave him an ultimatum, her or me. He chose her. It was hard, so hard, and it broke my heart. He told me he loved me, that he was going to leave her so he could be with me, but everything he ever said was a lie. I had to get away from him, from the situation I had put myself in. That’s how I ended up here.” She threw her hands up loosely in the air and let out a shaky breath before locking eyes with me. “What I’m trying to say is I’m just like Tiffany. I slept with a man who was already taken, a man who wasn’t mine to be with. I did the same shit that Tiffany did. If you don’t want to be friends with me, I understand. I’m still living with the karma of my actions, and losing you would just be another example of that.” She was sitting down on the bench in the middle of the room with her head in her hands. I pushed myself away from the locker and sat down next to her, taking her hands in mine so she would look at me.
“Dani, you are nothing like Tiffany. Your situation was different. You loved him, and I don’t know about you, but I can say from personal experience that when you love a man, you do some stupid fucking things. He told you he loved you, promised you a life he knew you wanted. Did you make a not so great decision? Yes. But, am I going to judge you for it? No. There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Dani, but I can promise you, I am in no position to give my opinion on how someone else lives their life. I told you, Dani, you’re my friend, and there’s nothing you can do about that. You’re stuck with me.”
That night had brought mine and Dani’s friendship to a different level. I still didn’t know what was going on with her and Lucas, but I knew that her past had something to do with the way she was handling it, and I could totally understand that.
After placing my stuff in my locker, I walked out onto the floor to get my tables ready for the night. Logan and Justin had gotten off work early due to rain, so I knew they would be coming in any minute. I was so excited to see Logan. I had finally decided to quit waiting around to see what his next move would be. The moment I saw him I was going to walk right up to him and kiss him so that every girl around knew he was mine. It might have been slightly cave womanish of me, but Logan was mine and I was ready to prove it.
I was standing behind the bar talking to Dani and checking my phone every few minutes. The last time Logan had texted me was a few hours ago when he had told me he was headed home. I assumed he had showered and spent some quality time with Justin and that was why he hadn’t answered me. Then I saw him walk in. My heart dropped and my stomach turned. I realized that he hadn’t been ignoring me because he was hanging out with the boys. The reason he was ignoring me had her arm wrapped around his and looked like a full-blown super model next to her all American boyfriend. I knew who she was the moment I saw her, and I could tell by her body language that there was only one reason she was back.
Lizzy was back, and she was here to claim Logan as hers again.
I never like to say that things in life are perfect. My mom taught me a long time ago that perfect was just a facade people used to cover parts of their lives they didn’t want others to know about. My life was never perfect. I had some great times, but never anything I would have considered calling perfect. But, the way things were in my life at that moment, I would say I was as close to perfect as I would ever be.
Molly and I had finally broken past that “friends but still flirt and secretly want to be together” point in our relationship. We were finally together. There were no labels with us. I wasn’t sure if she was ready for that, so I didn’t push her. Molly had been with a guy who pushed her in more ways than one for years. I wasn’t going to put her in a similar situation. When she was ready, she would let me know.
It wasn’t just things with Molly that were going great, everything in my life had picked up. Lucas was finally turning back into the big brother I knew and loved. I still knew there was something going on between him and Dani, but I had quit pushing him for information. He was like Molly; he did things when he was ready, in his own time, so I knew he would tell me eventually. He had be
en spending more time at our apartment, at least when I was there, and we were getting back to the relationship we had when we were more friends than big brother/little brother. He was happy that things were finally working out between Molly and me. He adored her and he had become slightly attached to Lyric. He would come over to Molly’s house at least once a week just to play with Lyric. He spent hours on the floor with her watching Mickey Mouse and building foam brick castles just so she could knock them down.
Lyric. That was another part of my life that was going better than I expected. She was so beautiful, so smart, she held my heart in the palm of her little hand, and she knew it. All she had to do was smile that gummy grin at me and she got whatever she wanted. I was a total pushover, and not ashamed to say it. I let her get away with things that her mother would not approve of, but she just had this way of looking at me that made me want to give her the world with a big pink bow wrapped around it.
When I stayed with Molly on the weekends, I always wanted to help her do everything when it came to Lyric. Well everything except diapers. I wasn’t ready for that yet. I would catch Molly staring at Lyric and me sometimes. It was a happy look, but there was sadness behind it also. I knew from our conversations that she worked harder than most to be a great mother since hers was a raging piece of shit. I think seeing Lyric and me together also hit a nerve with her. She knew her father’s name, had seen pictures, but had never actually met him. She had no desire to. In Molly’s mind, meeting Dix would have devalued the relationship she had with her grandfather since to her, he was her father. I could understand that. I just wished that Molly had a better childhood to look back on. I knew mine was no picnic, but I had my mom and Lucas.
Molly had finally broken me down one night when we were lying in her bed talking for hours like we normally did. I told her about my dad, well what I remembered at least. I told her about the drinking, the beatings, and the shit he put not just me, but my mom and Lucas through. I told her all of it. I told her about him walking out one day and me still not knowing why and not really giving a shit. I told her that I had thought of looking him up a million times but I would never actually do it. He wasn’t worth my time or my effort, and I didn’t really give a fuck about him enough to wonder how he was doing.
The hardest conversation that Molly and I had had lately was about Lizzy. I knew all about her relationship with Brian. Hell, I had witnessed parts of it, but she knew nothing about Lizzy and me. I had told her everything one night. How Lizzy and I met because we both liked to party. How I fell head over heels in love with her and how our relationship moved quickly, probably too quickly. I told her how Lizzy had eventually ended our engagement because she didn’t think I would ever amount to anything.
The reason I had dreaded talking to Molly about Lizzy was because I knew she would instantly start comparing herself to her. There was no comparison between the two. I had loved Lizzy, but the things I felt for Molly were so much more powerful and deeper than anything I had felt for Lizzy. That was exactly what I had told Lizzy when she called me a few days before telling me she had made a mistake and wanted me back.
Lizzy calling me was totally out of the blue. It had been at least six months since I had spoken to her and that was fine with me. I didn’t miss her. I didn’t miss her fake blond hair, fake smile, fake boobs, or fake personality. I had the real thing in front of me and I could finally see that even the love between Lizzy and me was just like her, fake. She had seen a picture of Molly and me on Facebook and called wanting to know who she was. I told her Molly was the girl I was seeing. She had apparently spent a hefty chunk of time Facebook stalking the shit out of Molly because she instantly asked me why I was dating a girl with a kid. She told me that deep down I knew I didn’t want to play daddy to a kid that wasn’t mine and that if I came back to New Orleans, back to her, that we could start fresh and make things work. I told her to go fuck herself and hung up on her.
So to say I was surprised when I pulled into my driveway that Wednesday and saw Lizzy’s shiny Range Rover in my driveway would be a fucking understatement. I was floored and pretty pissed. I pulled my truck behind her SUV and waited for her to get out.
She looked just like I had remembered. She was dressed in designer jeans with a skintight tank top that was cut too low. Lizzy was a good-looking girl. I was not blind or dead so I knew this, but she was no Molly. Besides her boobs her daddy bought her for her 18th birthday, she had no curves. Not like Molly who was all-natural and had curves in all the best places. She threw her long, dyed blond hair over her shoulder and walked up to me trying to shake the ass she didn’t have with every step.
“Well, hey, Cowboy.” I always fucking hated that nickname, and until now, I never realized that her voice sounded like a high-pitched 12-year-old. What the fuck did I ever see in this girl to be with her for years? To ask her to marry me?
“Lizzy, wanna tell me what the fuck you’re doing in Monroe, better yet in my driveway? I thought I made myself pretty clear the other night when we talked that I didn’t have shit else to say to you.”
“Oh come on, Logan, you know that was just another one of our little tiffs. I was in town to do a deposition for my firm. Instead of driving back down tonight, I decided to stay and see if you wanted to catch up. After all we’ve been through, the least we could do is be friends. Right?”
I huffed out a breath and walked past her heading towards my front door. I didn’t have to turn around to know that she was following me inside. I could hear the click of her heels against the concrete. This was not going to end well and I knew it. I was in a legit cluster fuck.
I turned around to face her and she gave me a look that I think was supposed to make her look sexy, but all it did was annoy the shit out of me even more.
“Actually, Lizzy, we do not need to be friends. We were never friends. I realize that now. So, I would greatly appreciate it if you would get out of my apartment because I have somewhere to be.” I sat down on the couch and started pulling off my boots hoping she would get the hint. But she didn’t. Considering she was in law school, she was fucking dumb sometimes.
“Where do you have to be, Cowboy? Going to see your new girlfriend?”
“Actually, yes, Lizzy, that’s where I’m going. She’s working tonight so I’m going to see her. Why are you still here?”
She placed both hands over her heart and acted hurt and scoffed. “Oh, come on, Cowboy, no need to be rude. I just wanted to catch up with you because I’m in town. I really came over to bury the hatchet between us. To tell you there are no hard feelings and I hope you’re happy with your new lady friend. I hope she treats you right because you deserve it.” She smiled what appeared to be a genuine smile at me and rocked on her heels. That was her nervous habit. I don’t know why I believed her, but I did. Maybe it was the glimpse I saw of the old Lizzy. The one I fell in love with. The sincere girl that she was before she turned into a cold-hearted bitch of a woman.
“She does treat me right, and she makes me really happy. She’s a great girl and I’m lucky that she’s giving me a chance. Now, not to cut this meeting short, but I really do have to get ready and my friend Justin will be here soon so we can head out for the night. Next time you’re in town, call me before hand and maybe we can get together. Maybe you can meet Molly.”
“I can meet her tonight. I could come with you and your friend to where she works. Just hang out for a bit, say hi to the girl who stole my Cowboy’s heart. Then head back to my hotel. I don’t know anyone here and I really hate to sit in a drab hotel room all night by myself. Come on, Cowboy, I’ll play nice. I promise.”
Warning signals and caution lights started flashing in front of my eyes as I looked at Lizzy with an expression that I’m sure said “what the fuck!”
Justin picked that moment to walk in without knocking, something I had noticed he did at Molly’s house too.
“Dude, you’re not ready yet? I told the girls we would be there early tonight.” He caught sight
of Lizzy standing a few feet from the door and stopped mid step. “Oh, hello. I’m Justin. Who are you?”
“Lizzy. I’m an old friend of Cowboy here.”
“Cowboy?” Justin shot up one eyebrow and gave me a suspicious glance before shaking the hand that Lizzy had stuck out.
Lizzy giggled and acted like she was embarrassed that she had just got caught calling me Cowboy. She wasn’t embarrassed though, I knew her well enough to know that. She was trying to show Justin that we had a history. The kind of history that involved nicknames. Fucking Lizzy. Always brewing up bullshit. “Sorry. I meant Logan. I’ve just always called him Cowboy. I was actually telling Logan here that he should let me come out with y’all and catch up some. I’m only in town for the night. I head back to New Orleans in the morning.”
Before I even had a chance to respond, Justin opened his big mouth. “That works for me. We’ll head up to Ricky’s if Cowboy here gets showered.” He laughed at himself, and in that moment I wanted to punch Justin, and I never wanted to punch Justin.
Lizzy clapped and did a little bounce that I knew was supposed to draw attention to her already front and center chest. This was so, so bad.
“Great, I’m going to go grab some make up out of my car to freshen up.” With a high-pitched squeal, she ran outside to her car.
“What the fuck, dude? Why would you tell her it was okay for her to come with us? Molly is going to fucking castrate me!” I was pacing my living room floor thinking of every possible horrible situation that could happen tonight. No matter what, this was going to end terribly.