His lips are over mine, touching ever so slightly, almost hovering when he says:
‘I missed you, I thought about you all afternoon ...’
And then he presses his lips on mine almost taking a nibble but without using his teeth. It feels so good that heat rushes all over me and when he takes a second nibble, my body instinctively moves closer to his, so that our chests are touching.
He takes a third nibble and when I do the same to him, he slants his lips tightly to mine in a searing kiss, his tongue caressing mine hotly, one of his hands in my hair and one at the small of my back, pressing me closer to him.
I get lost in the kiss for a while but then I push slightly away from him and whisper:
‘I want to stay here with you but boys aren’t allowed in the girls cabins and if we get caught...’
He touches my lips with his again for a brief moment and then he reassures me:
‘Don’t worry, I looked around and nobody saw us get in...’
I close the distance between us again and this time I initiate the kiss by crushing my lips to his and I open my mouth for him as soon as I feel his tongue at the seam of my lips.
He holds me tight and I grip his t-shirt in one of my fists, afraid to let go, afraid that I am just dreaming all this.
We kiss softly and yet there’s fire lurking under the surface, my body feels lit up by it, every sensation heightened by his touch.
I didn’t realise that while we were kissing, we kept walking towards my bed until the back of my knees touches the bed frame and without even knowing how, I land on the soft mattress with Xander’s mouth still on mine.
His body is partially on mine when he takes his lips away from mine and starts peppering really soft kisses underneath my jaw, trailing down my neck, all the way where my neck ends and my shoulder starts. He stops there, applying more pressure, nibbling my skin using his teeth to lightly graze and his tongue to soothe and then sucking my skin in his mouth very softly.
While he does that, one of his hands follows its own trail down my body, skimming the side of my neck, shoulder, boob and waist and stopping at my hip bone, gripping me gently there.
Now, if I thought kissing was amazing, his nibbling and sucking of my neck and his wandering hand give me the strongest and most delicious electric current I have ever experienced: my whole body is tingling and when his mouth returns on mine and the grip on my hip tightens, getting my thigh to lift to touch his jean clad hip, I feel something long and hard against the thin fabric of my skirt and panties and that gives me a huge jolt of pleasure, more like a shockwave and my core tightens and clenches almost violently, the pleasure almost becoming a bit painful such is its intensity.
Xander’s mouth leaves mine again and starts wandering down my front, tethering where the collar of my shirt meets my skin and the swell of my breasts begins.
With his hand still gripping my hip, he takes his other hand down my other side where he touches the side of my boob and grabs at it briefly while giving my neck another one of those nibbling and sucking kisses.
I feel his hardness swell up and hardening further and that sends another of those jolts of painful pleasure straight to my core and when my muscles clench, I feel wetness pooling between my legs and my centre feels warm and tender.
His hand grips my hip a little tighter and I feel that jolt again and I have to stop it, because I feel like I have lost control of my body, I am having feelings and reactions that are totally new and I don’t understand.
‘Xander... Xander...’
I breathe and he reluctantly lifts his lips from my skin and murmurs:
‘Yes, baby?’
I give his chest a very light push and I say with a quiver in my voice:
‘I... We need to slow down, I have never...’
My words hit him like a bucket of ice water and he lifts himself up, still hovering over me but not touching me anymore.
And here’s where things get even stranger because while I calm down slightly, my body misses his so much that it hurts.
‘Are you all right, baby? I am sorry, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. I didn’t mean to get so carried away, I am so sorry...’
‘No, I... It was amazing, it felt good, so good. It’s just that...’
He interrupts me.
‘You don’t need to explain. I would never do anything you don’t want to, I am sorry if I scared you...’
I caress his cheek with my hand, my breathing starting to slow down to a more normal rhythm.
‘I wasn’t scared of you, Xander. I was scared of myself, I felt things that I never felt before, I lost control, it felt unbelievable but... I am not really sure how far I want to go or how far we even were... Until this morning I hadn’t even been kissed...’
Oh my god! I didn’t mean to say that. I see his pupils dilate in surprise and a tear escapes one of my eyelids and trails down my cheek.
He kisses that tear away and sits up against my pillows, taking me with him and setting me down until I am nestled in his arms, with my head on his shoulders and sitting on his lap.
‘I...Clary, wow!’
Another tear streams down my face and I tell him that if he doesn’t want to be with me, I understand.
He looks at me as if I had suddenly grown two heads.
‘Why wouldn’t I want to be with you?’
I shake my head, and say feeling bitterness in my mouth:
‘Lucy’s right. I am a loser and a little girl...’
Xander hugs me tighter.
‘See? This is where I judge Lucy. Not for having sex when she wants to or for how many people she has been with but for using it as a weapon, to control, manipulate and shame other people. You have nothing to be ashamed about and I am honoured that I was your first kiss. I just hope I didn’t take something you were saving for someone else...’
His concern for me and my feelings is so sweet and endearing that I can hardly reconcile this guy with the douche bag I met at the airport, that kept teasing me and being sarcastic.
I give him a soft kiss on the lips, just for a few seconds, tearing myself away from him to tell him that I wasn’t saving that kiss for anyone and that I was glad to have shared that moment with him.
‘That kiss means what I wanted my first kiss to mean: that I like you, Xander...’
He kisses me again, sweetly, soft lips, slightly open.
‘Clary, I already told you that I like you but I want you to know that you are beautiful, smart, sexy as hell. I get lost in your eyes and unfortunately for you, you drive me absolutely crazy, this is how much I want you. But this doesn’t mean that we have to do anything or go any faster than you are comfortable with. We will figure it out together. I won’t lie to you, I thought I was going to get really, really lucky for a moment here...’
He gives me one of his bad boy smiles, like the first time he spoke to me after tripping me.
‘...But maybe slowing down isn’t that bad, I want you to know that I wasn’t trying to get laid and then move on, I want to get to know you, spend time with you and read that damn book once you are done with it!’
I laugh, a huge weight lifting off my chest.
‘I finished the book earlier. I can give it to you and I am on to the next one...’
He laughs and looks deep into my eyes, so close that I can see every gold fleck in his turquoise iris.
‘We have the whole summer to get to know each other but, baby, I really like what I see so far. And I am not saying this to flatter you but you could have fooled me that this morning that was your first kiss... And I think there must be some kind of stuff in your lip gloss because now I am addicted to your lips and I have to kiss you all the time...’
He kisses me and then says:
‘This must be my lucky summer: I can kiss the hottest girl here at camp...’
I kiss him again and the kiss is deep and sweet like our conversation, we lie down on my pillows but our kissing now is less feverish and
his hands don’t wander as if they were on a crazy exploration trip, they caress and soothe and stay mainly in my hair.
He uses his teeth to gently play with my bottom lip and I feel some heat starting to build up again but now I know he won’t be mad if I don’t want to go any further.
I am lost in his kisses, without a care in the world when my bedroom door opens abruptly and Hazel storms in.
‘Clary, he kissed me! Rob kissed me!’
Xander and I sit up and put some space between us but I see Hazel’s jaw drop.
‘Oh...Hmm... Sorry, guys, I saw the light on and assumed that Clary was by herself... I guess I will see you later...’
Xander smiles at me and places a gentle kiss on my forehead before getting up and reassuring Hazel.
‘No, Hazel, don’t worry, I was about to leave, Clarissa here was lending me a book...’
I hand him the copy of Anna Karenina from my nightstand and he smirks.
‘I’m sure this is going to be riveting, seeing how taken you were yesterday on the beach...’
I beam at him and tell him that it’s a great book but not with a happily ever after unfortunately and he jokingly scolds me:
‘Why would you tell me that? Is this to punish me for tossing your copy in the water yesterday?’
I smirk back at him.
‘Hmm, maybe...’
‘Well, I am still going to read it but I reserve judgement on what your punishment will be for spoiling the ending for me...’
He winks with those impossibly gorgeous turquoise eyes and bids us good night with one last smile towards me and a nod to Hazel.
My friend jumps on my bed and gives me a tight hug with an excited squeal:
‘When did this happen? I mean, yesterday you were all cozy on the beach with Logan and now I find you in bed with Xander...’
I tell her everything that has happened today, stopping just short of how exciting and dangerous things got earlier on between Xander and I and she asks the one million dollars question:
‘So, is he your boyfriend now? Does it mean that things with Logan are over?’
I tell her that I don’t exactly know and that Xander has told me that he likes me but he hasn’t exactly used the word boyfriend and girlfriend so I am not entirely sure. I still like Logan and I admit that I missed him today and ask her if she’s seen him.
‘He was at the arcade, playing with that new boy, Brooklyn and Austin. I left Brie there with Justin, Jemma and Lucy. Lucy and Hayley kept giving us the stink eye and Leah was all over Logan and Austin. Those girls really have it out for us this year...’
I tell Hazel about the confrontation they had with me outside the arts and crafts centre and she shakes her head, worried.
‘So, they hate you because they want Austin and Logan and they don’t know about you and Xander yet... Lucy probably hates Brie because of Justin and Brie needs to know about them, Clary, or she will be totally blindsided...’
Hazel is totally right and I decide to go find Brie right this second and tell her everything: it’s still 45 minutes to curfew, so I head out leaving Hazel to set out some of Brie’s favourite chocolates because I think she won’t like the news and will need all the soothing we can offer.
I step outside in the cool night and inhale the sweet scent of jasmine while I walk downhill to the arcade.
As I enter the building, I see no sign of Brie or anyone else for all that matters. I decide to walk back out when I see Logan coming out of the bathroom: he smiles and gives me a big hug engulfing me in his cotton candy scent.
‘Clary, where have you been? I missed you today! I was hoping to see you at the beach or here earlier on but you disappeared. Instead I had that really annoying girl, Leah, follow me everywhere!’
He rolls his eyes and I laugh at the irony that until last summer, it was Logan who followed me everywhere and I used to be annoyed by him.
‘Hey, Clary, curfew is near but would you like to just slowly walk back to our cabins and hang out till the last possible minute? We need to make up for the lost time tomorrow, yes?’
I agree to all of it and take his hand and walk out of the arcade with him.
I am telling Logan about finishing my book and going to art class when we see Joel walking down to the arcade, probably to lock it for the night.
Before he can see us, Logan drags me in a dark corner between the arcade building and a little storage shed.
My back touches the smooth wall and Logan closes in drawing my face up with a finger under my chin. The lights are dim but I can see his blue eyes darkening and face growing serious and closer to mine.
‘I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep a wink if I don’t kiss you...’
And he crushes his lips on mine, hot, almost feverish.
At first he’s trying to rein himself in keeping his mouth closed but from the amount of pressure, he can’t help himself and from how hot his lips are and how fast his heart is thundering against my chest, I know he wants more and I draw him closer and open my mouth for him.
His tongue enters my mouth without hesitation, caressing and exploring.
His kiss is different than Xander’s, a bit faster, less fiery but just as intense.
His lips are soft and he tastes of sugar and vanilla: I swipe my tongue softly against his and he moans against my mouth drawing away for air just for a second and then tasting my lips and my mouth with his lips and his tongue almost like you would eat a soft serve ice cream cone.
He keeps doing that and my hands find the back of his head and his silky blonde hair.
We are both breathless and yet we don’t stop kissing, his hand now finding the waistband of my silky skirt under my shirt.
He runs his fingers along the waistband, giving me goosebumps while his lips are taking a more leisurely nibbling of mine.
I catch my breath for a second, still kissing him and then I draw back and graze his bottom lip with my teeth teasingly like Xander did to me earlier.
He groans and his hands cup my face, his lips still touching mine when he says:
‘Shit, Clary! I don’t think this was a good idea if I was hoping to sleep better... This is going to keep me awake until I can kiss you again.’
I smile at him and pucker my lips against his once again, making him groan.
‘I thought kissing you would be nice and it isn’t...’
I put some distance between us to look at him but he puts a finger against my lips and continues:
‘It’s not just nice... It isn’t even great. No, it’s just like eating the best thing you’ve ever eaten and going on a roller coaster where you feel just the thrill and none of the queasiness... It’s like sleeping in on a Sunday morning, waking up to the snow on Christmas Day... Just... Wow!’
He doesn’t say it just to flatter me, he sounds dreamy as if he was just thinking all this stuff, it doesn’t sound like a prepared speech.
He closes in again on my lips and my head feels light and my heart full, I hold onto his neck like a lifeline, losing myself in the contact with his lips, in our breaths mixing.
He tears himself away from me, trying to slow down his breathing rate, his forehead touching mine, his arms still around my waist.
‘I guess, for as much as I totally hate to say this, we need to go back, each to our own cabins... But if you tell me that I can sneak in with you and sleep at the foot of your bed, then...’
I chuckle, still working on catching my breath.
‘I wish we could do that but I have roommates and for how much I think that Brie and Hazel would keep quiet and let us get away with it, I cannot be sure about the new girl...’
He pouts jokingly and nuzzles my neck, inhaling my scent...
‘That’s all good, I guess, because if I have to be totally honest, I wouldn’t be able to stay at the foot of the bed and I doubt I could ever keep my hands to myself around you, in a big bed...’
I push him away laughing at his usual goofiness and take his hand while walki
ng away from our secluded spot: we have barely 5 minutes before we are supposed to be in our cabins and if we don’t stop kissing, I know we’ll both miss curfew.
‘So, Clary... I am going to the gym tomorrow morning and then playing tennis, do you think I could see you at the beach for lunch?’
I agree with a smile and we walk towards my cabin where we stop in shock and disgust; possibly the second a lot more than the first: Brie and Justin are leaning against the wall of the front porch and if him sucking her face wasn’t horrible enough to look at, she has her legs wrapped around his waist.
Logan and I both roll our eyes in unison at this sight and this cuts short any goodnight kissing that we might have been attempting.
I get into the cabin walking past them and trying to act as if I can’t see them and I find Hazel peeking through the window of the lounge area.
‘I take it you didn’t tell her?’
She starts and I confirm that I haven’t seen her before getting back here.
‘What are we going to do? Shall we speak to her now?’
She asks and I sigh unsure of what to do.
‘I am not chickening out or anything, Hazel but I doubt that she would even believe me right now. I think it would be just a giant row...’
She has no time to respond anything to my comment because Brie storms in and jumps on us, wrapping us in a group hug, jumping around all excited and reeking of a harsh cologne.
‘Omg, omg, omg! He’s gorgeous, sexy, handsome, exciting, funny, hot...’
‘Didn’t you already say these exact words at the beach only yesterday?’
This time is Hazel’s turn to roll her eyes.
‘I did and I was totally right! He’s so dreamy and we have a date tomorrow and we are totally getting to third base...’
Ew. I try to shake that image off my mind and ask Hazel about her kiss with Rob.
She sighs and jumps on the bed, patting the space next to her for me and Brie to get comfortable.
‘My heart was going a thousand miles an hour and I only kissed another guy before him and Rob is 20, so he’s more of a man... I guess. I don’t know he kind of was... I don’t think he was kissing me for me but just because Justin and Brie were making out and I was there... But I plan to change that, if he gets to know me better...’
Lake Emerald Chronicles: The First Summer: A Reverse Harem Romance Page 10