by H. J. Bellus
Teebaby gets excited as I walk him over to the gate and he can see the arena lying before him and the three barrels. He’s ready to run and I have to check him a couple of times by pulling back on the reins. This gets him even more excited and ready to roll. Once I know he’s focused and sees the task ahead, I let him go, loosening up on the reins and settling back in my saddle for one hell of a ride.
My legs are stretched to the max as I kick him into gear. He easily turns around the first barrel taking it tight and wasting no time. I turn my head and look for number two while still kicking him on. He takes this one a bit tighter and I have to use my foot to kick it back up. I don’t have time to look back to see if I kicked it too hard and sent it to the ground. Teebaby takes the third one like a champ and I send him home with my legs flying up and down encouraging him along.
I have to pull back on his reins to bring him to a stop and instantly turn back on my saddle and see all three barrels standing upright in the dirt and then the number 15:06 flash across the enormous screen. The rest is a blur as the crowd goes wild. The announcer says something about a new arena record, and I see Merek tip his hat to me.
“Teebaby, did you hear that?” I bend down, wrapping my arms around his neck and bury my face in his black mane. My hat is squished to the side and I know several eyes are on me, but I don’t care.
The second thought that races through my mind is the one that I have to call my daddy to let him know of the good news. Then tears flow down into the mane of Teebaby like they have so many other times. It’s still a knee-jerk reaction to want to call my dad and talk to him or share good news. It’s only been four months since his death and I guess it hasn’t fully sunk in.
I let the last few tears drop down into Teebaby’s mane and then sit up and use the back of my hand to wipe away the rest. Everything inside of me wants to race back to the trailer, unsaddle my horse, and haul ass out of here, but I know it’s not respectful, and that’s the one thing my daddy made sure I was at all times. Respectful.
I sit tall on the back of Teebaby and watch the other girls run, not recognizing any of their names. Seventeens and eighteens are called out with a rare sixteen here or there. My heart swells with pride as each time is called, knowing that Teebaby and I are something special and would’ve set records my second year at college with no doubt.
The last cowgirl enters the arena and exits with an eighteen second run.
“Ready?” a young girl on horseback carrying the sponsor flag asks.
I nod and steady myself for the winning ride around the arena. It’s the first one since my dad died and a lot fucking harder than I thought it would be. I glance over to Merek, who is still shamelessly staring. I swallow back my tears and follow the young girl on horseback.
“Let’s make it a fast one,” I holler to her.
“You got it, Challis.”
The young girl kicks her horse into high-speed letting the sponsor flag fly high over her hat and I follow right behind her. The tears pool up and threaten to spill over as I fight to concentrate on the job at hand. My dad attended every single rodeo of mine and always watched from the bucking chute since he was the stock contractor and spent all of his time back there. He’d always watch from chute one and be there again for the victory lap. As we near the chutes, I force myself to look over at chute one and let reality sink in. The stone cold, harsh reality hit that my father is never coming back, and he loved this sport more than his own health. We pass chute one, and instinctively, I raise my right hand and offer a feeble wave. The action even shocks me and I whisper, “Bye, Daddy.”
Then the tears begin to race down my cheek. The action is more painful than the day we buried him six feet under at his favorite place on his ranch. That was devastating, but this is downright soul-crushing. Life just sent me the memo that I’m on my own the rest of my life, so cowgirl up.
When I look back up, I see Merek still perched on the end of the bucking chutes, waving his hat in appreciation and whistling at me. The man really has no worry in life and I can’t help but flash him a smile.
The victory lap is over as fast as it started, and even though it only lasted thirty seconds it felt like thirty days on my heart.
“Here you go. Each winner gets a bottle from our sponsor.” An older cowboy hands a bottle of whiskey to me.
“Thanks.”
“I knew your daddy real well. We even went to college together.” The older cowboy tips his hat and looks up to me. “I mean the whole two semesters he went. Anyway, he was a good guy and would be pissing proud of ya, young lady.”
This time a very weak thanks comes out as more fucking liquid pools behind my eyes. I’m not a crier or a wuss at that. I was raised by my dad and brought up like a tough little boy even though I have girl parts. It never stopped my dad from raising me with no boundaries. This crying thing has to fucking stop.
I hop off of Teebaby and loosen the cinches on his saddle, then pull his favorite treat from my pocket and give it to him. Sometimes I have to be careful he doesn’t take a finger. He loves his cookies. I tuck the reins in my back pocket as I twist open the whiskey. Teebaby would follow me anywhere, so I don’t worry about him spooking. I’m not a drinker, but in this moment I need to dull some pain and real freaking fast.
Hell, half the drinks people order at the bar I’ve never heard of and have to Google how to make the bastards. I raise the bottle, silently curse and toast my daddy, and then let the liquid flow down the back of my throat. It burns and nearly threatens me to puke, but I hold it back, not wanting to look like a pussy in front of the rodeo crowd. Weaving my way to my trailer, I take another sip and feel the immediate effects of the whiskey.
Teebaby’s reins tumble to the ground from my pocket. I stop for a second and throw them over his neck and keep walking. He sticks his nose up over my shoulder and sniffs the bottle I’m holding. I can’t help but giggle at my curious boy.
“No, this isn’t for you. Let’s get you another cookie.”
He follows me the rest of the way to the trailer and I dig around in the tack pen pulling out a cookie for him. I slip off his halter and put on a new one then tie him to the trailer. Just like any other athlete, I make sure he has his food that powers all of his muscles in front of him.
A loud ruckus catches my attention, and when I look over I see Merek crashing down into the bed of his truck with that annoying blonde tumbling down onto him. The sight makes my stomach turn and an even deeper level of disgust boils up inside of me. Why does he act so damn interested in me? Clearly, he’s interested in all two-legged creatures with the right parts.
I find the bottle and take another swig. This time I’m left with a spinning head and wobbly feet, but I pick up my area while Teebaby finishes his oats. The thrill of the bull riding fills the atmosphere along with its thumping music and the crowds roar of approval. This was my daddy’s event. He rode through college and won Nationals but never entered the pros because of me. He was never bitter about the situation and he told me he made the sweetest lemonade with the lemons life tossed his way.
He became a stock contractor, raising and bucking the rankest bulls in the nation. It was his business and empire he was proud of and couldn’t wait to pass it on down to me. It’s the same business that took his life when he was gored by a bull.
The cracking sound of a gate opening throttles more and more memories of him.
“I’ll go down as the guy who raised the cutest and toughest girl and bucking bulls in history. Well, not so much the cute part on the bulls.”
I down more liquid as the bull riding event amps up and I can envision my daddy standing behind each bucking chute betting on his bulls to kick ass.
“Dad, are you mad you have a girl and not a boy?” His hand reaches over and ruffles my bangs.
“Not one moment, Chally. I love you to the moon and back and always needed a mean little cowgirl in my life.”
“But I don’t ride bulls.”
“No, you
don’t, and thank God for that.”
It took me years growing up to get over the guilt of not being a boy and fitting into the rodeo scene with Dad. He never made me feel that way. It was all my stubbornness. It wasn’t until he brought Teebaby home that I found my spot in the rodeo world.
The smell of dirt hits my senses and I can only imagine it being stirred up by the bull in the arena and some proud owner with a smile covering their face. I take another swig of whiskey and giggle when I notice the bottle is over half empty. I try to plant my elbows into the top of my thigh and miss one, nearly causing me to tumble from the side of the trailer. I steady my ass back up against the trailer and settle in, throwing my head up to the sky and asking why to anyone who will listen.
It’s nearly dusk as the light clouds whirl around in the sky. My head begins to spin even faster and I feel my back sink down the side of the trailer. I slip off the ledge I was halfway sitting on and take a chug from the bottle. My ass hits the ground with a thud and I laugh out loud. Fuck, even my laugh sounds slurred.
“You okay?”
I look up into the most beautiful face I’ve ever seen. Unfortunately, it’s attached to Merek’s body.
“I’s fineeee.” I draw out the word fine to cover up why my speech is so slurred. I stiffen into an upright position trying to act as sober as possible.
Merek kneels down in front of me.
“Wants a drink?” I hold out the bottle to him noticing there’s only about a swallow or two left.
“Challis, did you drink all of this?”
I just shrug my shoulders.
“You’re going to be one hurting cowgirl in the morning.”
I watch as he sets it down at his feet.
“Drink,” I yell. His eyes flash between me and down to the bottle.
“What?” I try to stand on my feet. “Am I not good enough for you?”
“Challis.” His hands grip my shoulders as I tumble forward.
“I just set a fucking record in that arena. Beat all the hometown girls with their daddy’s money behind them and you won’t drink my wisskey?”
Merek has me wrapped up in one arm while he chuckles at me, which only pisses me off even further.
“Don’t.” I pound into his chest.
“Okay, sorry. Sorry.” He bends down, snagging the bottle from the ground. “Is this what you want, Challis?” He dangles the bottle in front of my face.
“I want you to have a drink with me.” I clutch the bottom of the bottle and help guide it to his lips.
“Okay, okay, calm down.” He parts his lips just enough for the opening of the bottle to rest on his bottom lip, and I pour all the liquid into his mouth.
I feel him backing us up until my back smashes into the side of the trailer, and it’s not until this moment that I realize I have one hand wrapped around his neck and the rest of my body pressed up against his.
“Happy now?” He crooks an eyebrow at me.
I let out a giggle.
“What’s so funny, Challis?”
“You’re cute, Merek Slatter.”
“You’re fucking wasted, Challis Jones.”
I shrug my shoulders. “This is my first rodeo since my daddy died.”
Tears fall down both cheeks this time as I hold nothing back nor have the willpower to hide the pain anymore.
“Come here.” Merek guides my head down on his shoulder and my tears flow down the crook of his neck. I feel his hand rubbing circles on my back in a soothing motion and I don’t fight any of it.
A long time passes before either of us move or even talk to each other. I allow my body to melt into his and let him hold me as I try to calm the wild stream of tears.
“Merek.” We both look up to see the blonde once again and it’s as if all my senses snap right back into place.
“Go. I’m sorry.” I push back on his chest. “I’m fine.”
Merek takes a step back from me and I feel my body sway. My feet try to find steady ground, but none ever comes and then my body is free falling to the ground. I feel Merek’s hands on me again and pulling me right back into his chest.
“Fine, uh?” He brushes a stray hair from my cheek. “I’m going to introduce you to Madison.”
“No.” But before I can put up more of a fight, the nosy bitch is standing feet away.
“Challis, this is Madison, and Madison, Challis. Madison and I were best friends growing up.”
I listen to the bullshit flying from his mouth but don’t react.
“Nice to meet you, Challis.” She runs her hands down the front of her short shorts, then turns to Merek. “I’m leaving, just wanted to tell you nice ride tonight.”
She steps up and places a peck on his cheek with me cuddled in his arms. I wipe at my eyes, making sure I just witnessed the scene that went down.
“You have a ride home? I know you’ve been drinking.”
She turns and points to a tall and lean cowboy talking to Merek’s brother.
“Fuck, you picked a roper out of all the cowboys around to take you home.”
“Yep, see ya, Merek.” She slaps him on the ass and bounces off.
Merek turns back to me and must see the obvious stunned look on my face.
“I thought…I thought…I mean, isn’t she your girlfriend?”
“No, longtime best bud and fuck buddy.”
I throw my spinning head back while I let Merek still hold me up. “Good lord, I need another drink.”
“You got it, cowgirl, but no more whiskey. Let’s just keep this drunken state up.”
“Thanks, Champ.”
“I hate it when you fucking call me that.”
“Good, I’ll keep calling you it.” I tilt my head back down and tap him on his nose.
My lips lightly brush his and he doesn’t pull back. The sweet and masculine taste lingering on them intrigues me and makes me want more. This time my lips linger on his, nuzzling from side to side, then my tongue darts out absorbing his delicious taste into my mouth.
“Kiss me, Merek.”
He doesn’t back away and talks on my lips. “Sober Challis wouldn’t like this at all.”
“Sober Challis worries too much. Please kiss me, Merek.”
Reservation fills his eyes, but then he clenches them shut and attacks my lips. My back is pressed up to the trailer again. Both of his large hands grab the sides of my face as he kisses me hard. I wiggle my way up to him and throw all of my body into him. After several seconds of his lips attacking mine, I play back and begin kissing him, not missing the moans of pleasure he releases in my mouth.
His taste is nothing I’ve experienced before and damn near addicting. My tongue laps up every ounce of it. A few hoots and hollers fill the air and I know they’re directed right at us. I remove Merek’s hat and cover our two faces with it, blocking out our little make-out session.
“I see you’ve kissed a cowboy a time or two,” he mumbles into my mouth.
“Maybe.” I shrug. “Or just watch a lot of western movies.”
“Which is it, Challis?”
“Shut up and kiss me, Champ.”
His lips are back on mine, kissing me even harder if that’s possible, as my one free hand tugs and pulls the man closer into me. Once sealed together, I trail it down the front of his shirt and search for the top of his jeans, and once I find his buckle, I flip it undone with ease.
Merek begins shaking his head side to side. “Nope, not tonight.”
“C’mon.” I nod toward the front of my trailer.
He grips both sides of my face and forces me to look up at him. “Challis, you’re going to hate me in the morning for just kissing you.”
I drop my head and mumble. “Yeah, go for the skanks anyway. I ain’t no buckle bunny.”
Merek doesn’t respond. Instead, he hoists me up and over his shoulder, slaps my ass, and begins limping. I can tell he’s in pain from the way my body sways side to side, and I feel as if I’m going to slide right off his shoulder.
“Merek, put me down now.”
He doesn’t listen to me, and when I look up I see the back of his pickup and feel him stop and slide me down his chest. He settles in on the tailgate of his truck and leaves me staring dumbfounded at him. He holds out a hand to me, but I don’t grab it and soon feel his grip on my forearm as he tugs me into his lap, twirling me around first. I settle nicely between his legs and look around at all the staring people.
I struggle a bit to get free, or at least turn and face Merek, but he keeps my hips firmly planted.
“Here, Sis. This will help.” His brother hands me a drink. “Maverik, by the way.”
“Yeah, thanks. I’ve waited on you in the bar.” I grab the drink and pound it, welcoming the burning whiskey. “Another.”
He chuckles and walks away. Looking back at Merek, I’m relieved he’s deep in conversation as my drunken state has begun to wear off a bit. Maverik hands me another solo cup and I slam it and then nurse the beer he hands me.
Merek’s telling tales of traveling up and down the road and the different buckers he’s been on. I sit and listen to him and almost feel like I’m back home with my rodeo crowd just bullshitting after a rodeo. I relax back on Merek’s solid chest, laying my head on his shoulder, gazing up at the star lit night sky.
“Too much whiskey?” he whispers in my ear.
“Yeah, I’m fucked up.” I reach up and lightly pet the scruff on his jawline. And even in my drunken state I know this has gone way too far already.
I remember his iced leg from earlier. “Hey, are you okay? What did you hurt?”
“I just tore some…”
My eyelids become heavy as his words slur together in my head, swirling around until my eyes finally shut and a welcoming darkness takes over.
Chapter 5
Merek
“So, you’re saying we need to hire five more employees on the ranch, work these race horses, and then sell them to get securely back in the black?” I stare down my father just waiting for the answer. There’s always some line of bullshit behind every single one of his adventures. The man is a gambler and a losing one at that.