The asshole.
As the door banged behind him, I ran to it and growled, hoping he’d shit himself with fright.
Amusement raced through me until I slumped against the door and slid to the floor.
I was interested in seeing what the pampered princess looked like. Would she be as put together as her fiancé, or would she be worse.
She wouldn’t stand out like my girl did. My girl? Who the fuck was I kidding? She wasn’t my girl, and probably never would be. I mean what were the chances of seeing her again. She’d been a mesmerizing presence in a crowd of hundreds. If I ever got the chance to have a girl, I sure as hell wouldn’t talk about her like he did.
He obviously liked to humor his fiancée, but I couldn’t help wonder what kind of books she wrote. I had a good collection of novels since I spent so much time alone when I wasn’t at the gym or at a fight. Most of my collection was crime and thrillers, but there were also some paranormal romance books on my shelves. I bet the asshole had never even read any of his fiancée’s books.
Asshole!
Today, I’d piss him off again, because I’d changed my mind about staying home.
A FEW HOURS LATER, I’d managed to sneak out again, but I knew it was only a matter of time before they discovered where I went.
I pushed the thought aside and, instead relished the afternoon crowd in the small bar. I loved it so much that it was a risk I was willing to take. Julio knew who I was and realized from the first that I liked to be anonymous while I was here. He’d always pour me a tall glass of milk during the day and a bottle of water in the evening. Right from the first, he’d told me only to pay when I lost a fight; otherwise my drinks were on him.
The bar was never busy on Sunday afternoons, until around five, which was why I’d decided to ditch my plans of being alone on my balcony for this place. I was still alone, but it just felt less lonely, as though I had a place where I belonged.
I would spend my time in a dark corner and watch others come and go. They’d come in with friends, loved ones, maybe; it was a guessing game with me. When the nights were busy I’d guess who would hook up with whom.
I wasn’t always right.
There wasn’t anyone here right now to grab my attention, until I glanced toward the door.
My heart stopped as the light streaming through the open door followed her inside. She was a redhead, and her hair shined like liquid fire. She looked shy and unsure as she hesitated on the doorstep. Then Julio called out and her whole face lit up with delight at seeing the older man. I felt something hit me in the chest.
Ridiculous.
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. It was the woman from last night and she was more beautiful than I remembered. My gaze swept over her body. Soft and delicate.
Julio tugged her close to where I was hiding in the dark, and offered her the table two over from mine. It gave me an unobserved view of the delectable woman. She removed her jacket and looked around, her eyes hovered on me before they moved away.
She knew someone sat where I did, but she had no idea who. I knew that my face was completely hidden, which was the reason why I’d chosen this particular seat.
With a glance over her shoulder toward me, she reached into her large purse and pulled out a laptop. I had no idea how to use one, but I’d seen others with them.
Once she’d set her work area up, and Julio had delivered her a tall glass of milk, she started to work.
She’d ordered milk.
Was that why Julio sat her near me? Because she ordered milk and we obviously came in alone.
The young woman was distracted so I used it to my advantage and really looked while I was unobserved; no Coach or guards watching my every move.
Her hair was a rich, glowing auburn with natural curls that tumbled carelessly down her back. The urge to bury my nose into the back of her neck and inhale her scent into my lungs was strong. The dream I’d had last night had been about the feel of her silken strands as they caressed over my body. Just remembering the dream, and having her so close, had my body twitching with tension; so much so that I shoved my hand into my jeans to rearrange my hard cock into a better position.
As I watched, her fingers stilled from the rapid speed on the keyboard, and then she tilted her head to the side. The shock of having those emerald green eyes locked onto mine when I knew she couldn’t see me caused my blood to thicken and pulse with arousal.
I was completely enthralled with her. The smooth skin of her face glowed with pale gold undertones was highlighted by the freckles dusting her cheekbones and over the bridge of her nose. Like cinnamon sugar. My eyes focused on her full and rounded lips while the tip of her tongue snaked out to run along them. It was clearly a nervous habit.
She quickly turned back to her computer, but her fingers stayed lax, as though she was distracted and couldn’t think.
Her curves made my mouth water. She wasn’t skinny like the women that they’d tried to award me with, she was all woman. Her breasts and ass would easily fill my hands, and the more I thought about pounding into her, the more my dick twitched and throbbed for release.
My fists clenched on the table because I desperately wanted to drag her to the back of the bar and finish what she’d started by just sitting there.
What the fuck was I doing?
I had no right to watch her, or fantasize about her touch, or what I wanted to do to her. I just couldn’t look away.
I eventually inhaled, and shook my head to try and clear the lust. It eased, but refused to leave.
God, I was losing it.
Why her? I’d never felt want or need as hard before.
All of a sudden, she jumped down from the seat, closed her laptop and shoved it back into her purse. She grabbed her jacket and the straps of her brown purse before she moved to the bar.
As she leaned over it to talk to Julio, the denim stretched over her curvy bottom, which put the vision of her doing just that with me behind her back in my head.
I silently moaned, and my erection leaped with excitement.
I needed a fucking cold shower!
How the hell was I supposed to deal with that? The whole emotion behind my want was ridiculous and scared the fuck out of me at the same time. Never before.
I’d craved someone to call mine but it was a faceless idea. Just something to look toward the future for, but there was something about the girl who was now leaving. My first thought was to follow her, but I’d probably terrify her with my size. Could I let her leave without knowing her name or how to see her again?
You don’t have a choice…she might not want to see you again...it’s dangerous to see her again…
“Fuck!”
I needed just one glimpse before I went back to my fucked up life.
Moving quickly, I punched through the doors and caught a leg disappearing inside a cab before the vehicle took off.
Disappointment settled inside of me as I stood on the sidewalk and watched her disappear out of my life. The sad fact was that she hadn’t really been in it to begin with.
Sighing, I rubbed the back of my neck and turned.
Julio stood behind me.
He smiled. “She’ll be back, my friend.”
I stared after him as he disappeared back inside the bar.
What was wrong with me chasing after a girl? I’d never done anything like it before, never had the opportunity to do so before, and the need settled heavily on my chest.
The way my thoughts had gone would be dangerous if anyone even suspected the longing I had. Just to feel the tender touch of a woman.
Someone who they didn’t bring me.
Someone who wasn’t paid to be nice to me.
Someone who I’d only send away.
Just once I wanted to know what it would be like to have such innocence in my life.
My head thrown back, I breathed deeply and gazed up at the sky, angry at how my life had turned out.
Would I ever get the chance at
a future that didn’t involve fighting?
I sneered at the irony of it all. If you had asked me when I was fourteen, all I’d wanted was to be a fighter so I could be one of those guys my dad idolized. I’d wanted to do that so I was close to him but that changed the moment he ran from that alley…the moment I realized I’d meant nothing to him.
When everything had first happened, I didn’t believe that he would leave me like that. I thought he’d come back. Every time we were in public, I looked. Every time I entered the arena, I would look for him from under my hood. I’d keep my head down but my eyes searched for him. If I was honest, they still did. I have never stopped searching and I never would.
My father was warned away from the fights, but it’s been years so why wouldn’t he be back after all that time? I knew him, and he wouldn’t have stayed away for long. He probably spent the years since I made my debut betting on me. Had he made a fortune off me while I paid off his debt with the bastard he’d given me to?
I still don’t know the fucker’s name but I’ve heard people call him the “Irishman” in fear. One day he would be mine, and he was going to tell me the full story of what went down ten years ago. His men had hinted that there was more to it than what I heard that night. I’d never figured out what the more was. But I would even if it took another ten years.
With my fists clenched, I pulled my hood low over my head so I wouldn’t be recognized. I glanced up and down the street before I made my way down the sidewalk and back to hell.
Evie
I SHOULDN’T REALLY BE here, but I couldn’t go home when I felt so out of sorts. The feeling had suddenly hit me not long after I’d arrived at Julio’s bar, and even as I let myself into Millie’s apartment my heart still beat frantically in my chest.
That was twice in two days, not even twenty-four hours between. What the heck was going on with me? Millie would talk me around. To what, I had no clue. I basically needed her to tell me what an idiot I was being. She really was the most down to earth person that I knew and she was never afraid to tell me the truth.
“What the hell.” I fell into Millie’s apartment mid-thought when the door was yanked out of my hands.
“Are you okay?” Millie grabbed me seconds before she tugged me inside and slammed her door closed. “I thought you said you’d never need the security card I gave you to this place.” She frowned.
“I didn’t even think about that.” I shrugged, placed my purse on the floor and tugged her over to the sofa. “Something really weird happened and…and I think I’ve finally lost it. I mean,” I rushed on, “how many twenty-two year olds get freaked out during the day in a bar all because I felt eyes on me, as though the person wanted to eat me up.”
Groaning, I dropped my head between my knees. “God, I feel strange. Not only was there the fighter from last night, but then today.”
“You’re not making any sense.”
For the first time since I’d arrived, I raised my head and looked at Millie. She stood in front of me, bewilderment clear on her face. “That’s not surprising because I can’t make any sense out of it.”
“You need to calm down and start at the beginning.” Millie turned me around and pushed my shoulders until I was lying down. My head fell into her lap and her fingers began playing with my long hair. It was something that she’d done since we were kids, and it always had a soothing effect.
“I went to the small bar I love. It’s the only place where I can breathe. Well, except for with you, but you know what I mean.”
Millie frowned, which told me that she hadn’t really known what I meant.
I couldn’t stay down because I was too restless after being at Julio’s place, and I needed more of something. I just didn’t know what.
“Okay.” I breathed in and out a few times before I felt calm enough to talk. “When I entered Julio’s place, he greeted me as usual…but instead of sitting me at my regular table he took me further into the bar.” I watched Millie frown, and asked, “You following.”
She nodded.
“He seemed to look off into a darkened corner and when I glanced there, at first, I didn’t see anyone, but then I felt eyes on me. As though someone was staring at me so hard they could see through me. I know I’m not making much sense, but when I turned, the shape of a large man was visible.” I paced back and forth in front of her window.
“It sounds like you need to stay away from there.”
“No, I want to go back.”
“Evie, are you crazy? That guy might have problems. Who sits in the dark staring at women?”
She was right. Of course she was right.
I felt something though, even if I did run to Millie’s.
For a few minute, as my hands had hovered over the keys of my laptop, I’d felt his loneliness reaching out to me. It had been familiar…as though I’d felt it before and I had when I’d been sitting in a crowded arena, watching the fighter last night.
Maybe because he felt it too.
All I’d seen of the stranger at the bar was from his waist up to his chest, and his arms, which had been long, leading to large hands. I’d wanted to see more, but I’d chickened out and ran as though my ass was on fire.
I’d go there again.
I had to.
The pull had been strong.
Nothing that strong could be left to the what if’s.
Even the little voice in my head, reminding me that I was supposed to be getting married soon, did nothing to persuade me that it was a bad idea.
“He could be a murderer, or an ex con. Someone that you don’t want to touch you.” Millie looked serious about her suggestions when I glanced at her.
“I don’t think he is.” I dropped into the chair by the window.
“Oh my God!” Millie jumped up and kneeled in front of me, her hands grabbed mine and held tight. “Please tell me you’ll stay away.”
I bit my lip. I didn’t want to lie to her. But really, I knew that I would go back to Julio’s. It was my escape, my bit of solitude from everything about Patrick and the wedding. Except now, I had more of a reason to go back. I wanted to see who it was in that corner.
Julio would know. I had a feeling he purposely made me sit close to the mystery man.
“Evie, stop daydreaming and promise me you won’t go back there.”
“I’m not going to make a promise I know I’ll break. I wish I could explain it to you, but I can’t.” I closed my eyes and prayed she didn’t think I’d completely lost it when I admitted, “He made me throb, Millie.”
Her eyes widened in surprise.
“I’m serious. Full-on, panty wetting throb. That’s why I ran. The feeling came over me so quickly that it scared the hell out of me so I left. But God, I squirmed when I got into the cab and my heart thudded in my chest like it was going to explode. It was so raw…so primitive, and…and I need to feel it again.”
Millie dropped to her bottom. “You’ve never been like this before. I don’t know what to say or do. I’m the wild one. The one who usually runs to you with guy problems. This…this is weird.”
“I know it is.” We stayed quiet for a few minutes before I admitted, “Patrick’s never wet my panties.”
“What?” she choked out.
“Well, I mean,” I felt a blush coat my cheeks, “obviously things worked but I mean instant wet panties didn’t happen before today. I don’t even know what this guy looked like. Just that I got the impression he was big.”
“Big,” she snickered.
“I only saw his chest and hands.” I shoved her over, and giggled like a schoolgirl with her. “He was all heat, Millie.”
She became serious. “You really are serious about wanting to see this guy?”
I nodded.
“I was afraid you’d say that.” She clambered to her feet. “I think I need to be there next time. To keep you safe.” She grinned.
I groaned. “Yes, Mom. But remember he’s mine. I saw him first.”
&nb
sp; She rolled her eyes. “How old are we again?”
“Stop. I’ve been thinking since Patrick’s arranged the gym thing for us, we could go tomorrow, and I thought we could work out while we’re there.”
“You’re kidding right? You want to work out with all those hot, sweaty bodies around us?”
“Um.”
“Evie, you won’t even walk into a gym on your own, how are you going to get up the nerve to work out while they watch us make asses out of ourselves?”
“Ugh! As you put it that way, we’ll just do the watching.” I grinned.
I was just as susceptible to a hot, sweaty guy as the next person, engaged or not.
The ‘engaged’ part made my heart sink. I didn’t want to be engaged, and wished with all my heart that I’d had the courage to refuse Patrick when he’d asked.
My own parents had said nothing. My mother had been overtaken with excitement that her only daughter was about to get married. My mom wanted grandchildren, so any husband would do.
Patrick really had been fun to begin with. He’d made me laugh and while he didn’t excite me in the bedroom, the sex had been okay, I guess. But leading up to our engagement, I sensed that his mind was constantly elsewhere. He was abrupt with me and would tell me one thing and do another. I’d started to work up to telling him that we were over when he surprised me with a trip to the Florida Keys.
I’d still felt something was going on with him while we’d been there. He didn’t seem like the same man I’d started dating.
“You’re thinking about Patrick,” Millie commented. “You always go brooding and have this look on your face as though you’ve swallowed something horrid.”
“I’m not that desperate.” I plopped down onto the sofa, kicked my ballerina shoes off and placed my feet onto the coffee table while I thought about what to say. “It’s my fault that I’m in this mess, Millie. I could have said no, but I didn’t.”
“That ass asked you in front of a room full of people. He knew you’d say yes in a situation like that. He knows how you think, how you were trained to act in public, which means you have to change things up.”
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