by Carol Rose
“Shhh,” he said, catching her hands. “There’s no rush.”
“Yes, there is,” she contradicted him fiercely, renewing her assault on his belt. “Fast and hard. Now.”
He seemed to instantly understand, making no further attempt to turn the moment into something more tender. Hot, consuming sex was the only thing acceptable to her. At this moment, it seemed necessary.
Kelsey cupped him boldly, aflame with desire. Just holding him, stroking his smooth, hardness made her quiver inside with anticipation.
Completion. She needed him to fill the void.
Jared faltered in his own exploration of her body, his breath more labored with her every touch.
Pressing her back against the reclined chair, he pushed up her short skirt and stripped off her panties ruthlessly. Within seconds, he knelt before her, her legs spread as he guided himself to her.
The tip of his erection felt smooth and deliciously hard against her hot flesh.
He hovered there, resting against the portal, but not pressing on. Bending to her, he cupped both her breasts in his hands, suckled and kissing her until she squirmed against him.
Then, in one smooth push, he was inside.
Kelsey clung to him, each long hard stroke bringing shivers of heaven. She heard her own breathing mingled with his harsh pants, heard the pleading, moaning in her throat with his every thrust.
Nothing. Ever. Felt. So. Good.
She’d have bargained with a deity to have this moment last forever.
Stroke by stroke, intimate, hard, breathtaking, he rode above her. Her arms flung out over her head, she rose to him, straining, gasping. Paradise in every movement, every driving push.
Kelsey felt the spiraling inside her, heard her own hoarse cry as the world exploded, sending rivulets of pleasure shivering over her. She threw her arms around his broad shoulders as the convulsion ebbed, a sob in every breath.
He was still hard in her, but stopped, kissing her temple, her mouth. Pulling out and bending to lick her nipple, then entering her again, Jared stopped hilt-deep. Encircling her in his arms, he rolled over until he lie on the bottom of the broad chair and she on the top.
A cool breeze tickled at her naked back. She sat astride him, fully engaged, his hands plucking at her breasts, then bracketing her hips.
Moaning, she moved against him, rocking and straining. With his hands firm on her hips, they thrust and moved together. He was powerful beneath her, both giving and taking, his face flushed with concentration.
Awash in sensation, Kelsey felt him thicken inside her, stroking faster now, harder.
She heard the harshness of his breathing and the rising, gasping wave of pleasure in her. Giving herself over again to the jubilation, she felt Jared stiffened and cried out.
Kelsey leaned forward, rocking with him as the spasms subsided. Collapsing on his chest, she felt the thundering of his heart.
Shifting her sideways, after a moment, Jared pulled her limp body against his, sheltered and cradled. She breathed in the scent of his body and sighed, holding tight.
She couldn’t let herself love him, but would she be able to give him up when their year together was over?
****
Jared snuggled his naked wife closer against him, wanting to shelter her against the breeze that rustled over the terrace.
She’d come to him, just as he’d hoped. He couldn’t help the surge of satisfaction it gave him. Far beyond the cataclysmic release of their bodies, her sexual availability convinced him he was winning her heart.
No matter how hip Kelsey looked and talked, he knew she’d never let a man love her body if she weren’t willing for him to love her heart as well.
***
“I don’t give a damn how you have to do it,” Jared said calmly an hour later. “Deliver that contract.”
Kelsey paused, fresh from the shower after their passionate interlude on the terrace. She heard Jared’s voice floating in from the living area. He was on the phone apparently. His business didn’t stay confined to the usual work week.
“I realize they’re being difficult. Yes. Well, I guess we’ll just have to break the union.”
She put the hair brush down, her hand trembling ever so slightly.
It always seemed so difficult to reconcile her generous, hot-blooded lover with the man who’s voice could be so implacable.
“If the U.S. Government can run the FAA without the union players, we can certainly handle one hotel,” Jared said.
Slipping the brush into the drawer, Kelsey found herself straining to hear the rest of the conversation.
“I want what we started out to get,” her husband said to his employee. “As long as we’re not breaking any laws, anything goes.”
With a quick step, she closed the bathroom door, Jared’s words still echoing in her head. He was certainly used to getting what he wanted.
Where did that leave them? Just how far would he go to get the child she now suspected he desired from her?
Of course, she could be wrong about that. Maybe he hadn’t meant anything by what he’d said to her mother. Still, she couldn’t help the shiver of fear that ran through her as she sank to the vanity chair behind her. Could she out-maneuver Jared and fight her own heart at the same time?
The fact that she couldn’t answer her own question left her feeling shaken. She couldn’t love him, couldn’t lay her heart open so foolishly. No matter what it took, she’d guard her feelings with determination, even though doing so was getting harder and harder.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
“I’d like a turkey on rye, light mayo and mustard,” Kelsey told the guy behind the counter. His was a face she didn’t recognize, a new hire, she supposed. Since the Big Apple Deli was two doors down from her office building, she came here often enough to know the regulars.
Waiting for her sandwich, her mind drifted back to the day before, making delirious love to her husband on the balcony.
Being with him again had left her feeling satisfied and mindlessly peaceful. For about five minutes.
She’d initiated sex to prove something to herself, but the outcome wasn’t as clearly successful as she’d like. Her heart was proving to be very unruly.
Then she’d overheard his phone call about the union and remembered that nothing was simple between them. Jared went after what he wanted. But did he do it without regard for others’ feelings? She couldn’t be sure, didn’t even know why it mattered so much to her.
The entire day had left her with mixed emotions. She wished things could have stayed as simple as she’d planned. Yes, he appeared to have a hidden agenda, but wasn’t that to be expected?
How many people didn’t have something or other they wanted out of a relationship? And how many were completely honest about it?
Maybe he hadn’t been trying to trick her into having his children for him. Perhaps he really had just thought she’d make a good mother. After all, she was on the pill. Even Jared couldn’t magically alter the power of pharmaceuticals, could he?
She was so confused.
Still, she knew nothing about his business. His way of handling the union negotiations might be typical. But it bothered her to hear that hard note in his voice, bothered her to think he’d manipulate people heartlessly.
She didn’t want to think of him like that.
“Mrs. Barrett. Mrs. Barrett!”
Kelsey jumped, realizing the male voice to her right was speaking to her. She didn’t use her married name generally.
Turning, she saw Stewart Black, the union negotiator.
“Hello,” he said with a warm smile. “What a lovely surprise, running into you.”
Startled to see him, of all people, Kelsey didn’t immediately take the hand he offered.
“Stewart Black,” he prompted, “I had dinner with you and your fiancé, husband now, a few weeks ago.”
“Of course.” She shook his hand.
“Turkey on rye, light mayo and mustard,” the coun
terman interrupted, shoving the sandwich at her.
Stewart waited while she paid for her lunch. When Kelsey turned toward the crowded sitting area, he fell into step beside her.
“I have a table over here,” Stewart said with a wave of his hand. “You’re welcome to join me. It’s really packed in here.”
Kelsey hesitated a fraction of a second. On the one hand, he was in an apparently heated negotiation with her husband about a matter that was none of her business. On the other hand, she could see nothing in his manner but casual friendliness. Refusing to sit with him seemed rude.
“This place is really popular,” Stewart said as they threaded their way through the dining area. “It wasn’t nearly so crowded when I ate here last.”
“The throngs have discovered it,” she agreed, conscious of a shiver of relief. He’d eaten here before and had just happened to drop in again. Nothing more sinister. Just a chance meeting.
They sat down, barely managing to fit their sandwiches, drinks and napkins on the tiny table.
“So you’re married now,” Stewart said easily as he crunched a pickle spear.
“Yes,” she mumbled, wiping away a smear of mustard at the corner of her mouth.
“I saw the announcement in the newspaper,” he went on, shaking his head. “A very courageous thing to do—marriage. My girlfriend has been suggesting we tie the knot for several months now.”
He looked so comically harried, so much a man hesitant to take the plunge that Kelsey laughed. “It’s a big decision.”
“Yes,” he agreed. “How many marriages last these days? I just think we should be sure.”
“Good thinking.” She took a swig of her diet drink.
“The trouble is,” he leaned forward, “what do you really know about this person? Sure you date, you see them quite a bit, but people can hide things.”
Kelsey looked at him, chewing a bite of her sandwich. His blond hair fell forward in a boyish manner, his blue eyes were crinkled at the corners with a good humored smile.
“I mean, what if I marry her and find out she’s totally different than I’d thought?” he said earnestly. “What if she doesn’t care about people? Maybe she’s mean to little kids.”
“Surely you’d know that about her," Kelsey suggested slowly, “if you’ve gone out a while.”
He shook his head with a rueful smile. “But what if I don’t see her, say, at work. Or with her friends. I don’t know. People aren’t always what they seem.”
“No,” she agreed, “but you can usually tell the important things.”
“What about you?” he asked. “Did you know everything about your husband before you married him?”
A sensation of alertness ran along her nerve endings, but Stewart was taking a bite of his sandwich, his attention apparently focused on keeping the pastrami from slipping off the bread.
“I knew him pretty well,” she answered, reassured by his apparently casual interest.
“So there weren’t any big surprises? No skeletons in the closet?” he asked, picking up his drink.
“It’s only been three weeks,” she said with a laugh.
“Of course,” he said, his blue eyes twinkling. “The really big surprises don’t come till later, I’ve heard.”
“How reassuring,” she said with the quirk of a smile.
“I love my girlfriend,” Stewart said, “but what if she turned out to be someone I couldn’t respect? What if she had no principles in her work? It might be hard to stay with someone who isn’t honest, someone I couldn’t really trust.”
“That would be hard,” Kelsey agreed, her throat feeling tight.
“I mean, what if you found out your husband owned a factory in Asia and worked little children twelve hours a day? Wouldn’t that bother you?”
“Of course,” she said, “but he wouldn’t—“
“No, no, he wouldn’t,” Stewart agreed quickly. “But you see my point. Integrity is integrity. You can’t have much of a marriage without it.”
Kelsey swallowed the dry lump of bread, his words echoing in her head.
The guy had a point. They weren’t just talking about children in Asia, either.
It didn’t matter that hers wasn’t a real marriage. She didn’t want Jared to sacrifice his honor just to get a better contract. Regardless of how it would affect others, that wouldn’t be good for him.
She couldn’t let herself fall in love with him, but she cared about him. Was her caring misplaced?
***
Kelsey sat down at her desk.
“Seems like we haven’t talked in forever,” Amy said, scooping a stack of papers off a chair and sitting down.
“I’ve been swamped since I got back,” Kelsey admitted. “First the wedding and the honeymoon. I’m finally getting back to my normal work pace.”
“Mmmm,” Amy said, blowing on her coffee to cool it. “Everything overdue, as opposed to the usual amount of stuff overdue.”
“That’s it. How are things going with you?”
“Good,” Amy said, smiling. “Thanks to you for falling in love with Jared.”
“Thanks to me?” Just the words “falling in love with Jared” sent prickles over her, but Kelsey was determined not to let her sister see her reaction.
“Doug is much more…,” Amy appeared to grope for a word, “responsive. He’s almost ready to realize he’s always loved me.”
“Really?” Kelsey searched her sister’s face. “So, things are still going well between you two?”
“Very well.” Her smile turned smug.
“Well, good. Good. I’m glad.” Kelsey shuffled the stack of paper in front of her. “He’s been a fool not to be interested in you before.”
Amy giggled. “Last night, we talked again about moving in together. We’re definitely considering it seriously.”
“Really? You’re really going to move in together so soon?” Kelsey couldn’t help exclaiming. “Is that wise? I mean, you just started really dating.”
“I know.” Amy shifted her coffee cup in her hands. “But we’ve talked about it. He’s really gotten over you. Heck, we even bought a couch together.”
“A couch?” She knew her question sounded bewildered.
“Remember I’ve been looking for a new couch for a while?”
“Sure.”
“Well, I didn’t want to buy one Doug didn’t feel comfortable on, not now that we’re together. So I asked him to go shopping with me.”
“And he did this voluntarily?” Kelsey asked, her tone dry.
Her sister laughed. “Yes, eventually. Then, out of the blue, last week he actually offered to pay for half of it and started talking about how we should move in!”
“Wow. Doug’s pretty tight with his money,” Kelsey commented, starting to feel relieved. “He must really be serious. I don’t think he’s ever lived with anyone before.”
Amy leaned back in her chair, excited contentment in her face. “No. I’ll be his first and last.”
“Actually moving in together. Jeez! When is this going to happen?” Kelsey looked at her younger sister, trying to suppress a niggle of anxiety. Her concern made no sense. Everything she’d done in the last two months had been with this goal in mind. Amy was the best. She deserved this.
“Well,” Amy said after taking a sip from her cup, “we haven’t talked about specific dates. But it’ll be soon.”
“I’m glad,” Kelsey said, affection rising in her as she looked at her only sibling, the younger sister she’d always tried to shelter.
“We talked about his crush on you, too,” Amy assured her. “And Doug says it was just a kid-thing and he’s really ready to move on.”
“I’m glad,” Kelsey murmured, her gaze resting on her sister’s face. “I’m so glad for you both.”
***
“Jared?” Kelsey’s voice was hesitant in the darkened bedroom.
“Mmmm?” He pulled her closer, reveling in the smoothness of her skin against his. He knew she s
till held back from him on some level, but at least the coldness was gone and he could once again act out his love. With every touch, every kiss, he wanted to show how important she was to him.
“The other day I heard you on the phone,” she said abruptly.
Jared frowned, puzzled by the note in her voice.
“Yeah?”
“This contract you’re negotiating with the union,” she said, pulling out of his arms to sit up in the bed.
She paused then, as if uncertain how to continue.
He turned to look at her, searching her profile in the dim light that shone through the curtains.
“I don’t know anything about your business,” Kelsey said, as if throwing out a disclaimer.
Jared sat up, leaning back against the padded headboard with a sense of growing disquiet. “But?”
“Remember, before we got married, I was there at dinner with you that night when you were talking about the contract?” Her voice quavered ever so faintly.
“Yes,” he said, unable to keep the implacable note out of the single word. He didn’t know where this was going, but he couldn’t imagine why she needed to concern herself with his contract disputes.
“I just wondered,” she started with a rush, “if you’re being….”
“What?” he prompted, pushing aside his annoyance at having a moment of intimacy disrupted by what he suspected wouldn’t be a pretty conversation.
“If you’re being fair. Now, I don’t know anything about it,” she repeated, “but I heard you tell Stewart Black one thing and…then say something totally different to your negotiator.”
“Yes,” he admitted readily, still not sure what her angle was.
“Well, then…then the other day, you were on the phone again and you said something about breaking the union,” her voice trailed off.
He didn’t respond, battling a confusing mix of frustration, helplessness and anger. Clearly, something was worrying her. He wanted to listen, to sort it through, but his heart was rebelling. With every day that passed she became more vital to him, every day he struggled to make this work.
He loved her, dammit. And she didn’t trust him. Didn’t trust him even to be fair with his employees.