Those same split-second decisions I make to save lives while keeping calm under pressure? It’s like that meeting Evelyn.
I just know this is right.
I just know I need her and she needs me. I don’t quite know just how right this second, but I know she will be mine.
Interrupted by the nurse, I feel my annoyance along with my protective instinct for her rising up inside me. Along with something else I haven’t felt in a while.
Having her so close to me, it feels like the most natural thing in the world when my body responds to hers.
I tell the nurse I’ll be right out, it’s a long operation ahead of me and I need to prep and scrub.
The thought of leaving Evelyn alone while I go save her dad feels weird. Like if there was some way I could take her in there with me, I know I would.
As much as it pains me, I know it’s time. I need to go now and I tell her so, reminding her that she’ll be kept updated throughout the whole procedure.
Standing to go, I don’t even care if she sees how hard she’s making me. A part of me wants her to see it. Needs her to know.
But her eyes are on mine as I turn, relieved once she throws herself into my arms, begging me to save her dad. Telling me she’ll do anything if he lives through this.
Anything?
The thought is enough to catch my breath. And I feel my arousal kick up a notch, grinding into her soft body as I hold her closer.
Promising her the one thing I can, that everything is gonna be alright from now on.
I eventually have to go, but there’s more said with our eyes before I go than either of us could manage with words.
Do I get a raging hard on and hug every relative of my patients?
Never.
I’ve consoled countless patients and their families, but never like this.
This is different, and we both know it without having to apologize or make excuses.
I promise her I’ll be back as soon as I can, and then as fast as it all seemed to happen, I feel sucked back into the real world.
The world of procedures, routines, and rules.
The world of the hospital operating room where I know I’ll have my one-time best friend under the knife.
If it weren’t for Evelyn, I’d be nervous. Probably would have passed it up because it’s such a huge conflict of interests. But like I said, emergencies happen and all of us on the front lines stick together.
I don’t hold a grudge against Nick Partridge, that’s never been the issue.
It’s his seething hatred for me that’s gonna be the problem once he wakes up and finds out it was me who fixed his broken heart.
But with what I know I feel between me and his daughter now. What I know I have to do, to claim her.
Am I healing his broken heart or setting myself to break it for him all over again?
Fortunately for me, the habit of prepping for and readying myself mentally for surgery is enough to block all that out.
One step at a time with the surgery and then again with his recovery.
But I’m not sure I can hold the same beliefs when it comes to his only daughter.
I don’t want baby steps when it comes to Evelyn. I want all in, and as soon as possible.
Someone as amazing as her is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, which I know I can’t afford to lose or even risk losing.
CHAPTER FIVE
Evelyn
I mean it.
And I hope Mark knows just how much I mean it. I’ll do anything if he can help my dad pull through this.
I’m counting on that anything to include exploring that hardness on top of his already chiseled body as he held me so close.
Truth be told I’d do anything he asked anyway, but it just sort of came out of my mouth like that, and Dr. Love seemed to like what he was hearing.
I’ve never even really been up close with a real man, but I know enough biology to understand the male sex organ and how it works once it’s aroused.
I also know my own body well enough to know, his’s unlocked a floodgate of something I’ve only ever dreamed.
Mark was definitely packing heat once he held me close, both of us feeling the pain of separation, but I know he has a job to do.
If I could sit in on the operation, I would. But only to be closer to Mark Love.
The thought of my dad under the knife isn’t something I even want to think about. The memory of Mark telling me he’ll be fine, that we’ll both be okay after this is comfort enough.
True to his word, I get an update from a nurse or assisting doctor at every step of my dad’s surgery.
“He’s doing fine,” and “Much better already” are words I need to hear.
It’s a relief with a new kind of pressure though. More than the guilt of knowing I should have gotten dad to his own doctor sooner.
But I wonder too, how’s Mark doing? Does he know I’m just as worried about him as I am about my dad?
Worried I might have imagined our little meeting.
Concerned I might be imagining just how caring the good doctor is.
But no.
I clasp both hands over my belly, where his fat dick was pressed into me as he promised me he’d make all this right.
I should pinch myself, I must be dreaming.
Mark Love has mounted his steed and is off to slay the dragon. Soon to return and carry me off to his castle.
Isn’t he?
Without him here now, it all seems like a dream again. Like I might be suffering some sort of trauma-induced fantasy.
Could Dr. Mark Love, the man of my dreams, actually be hot for me as much as I know I’m burning for him?
I hope this feeling inside me is right. I hope the screaming answer of yes in my mind is right.
I know it is.
It has to be.
I’ve never felt anything like this in my whole life.
Not sure how long I sit like this, a half-smile on my face until I hear the heavy door of the waiting room click open.
I feel my breath catch and my heart leaps, sure it’ll be Mark again.
It’s not.
It’s a nurse in a mask, bringing me hot coffee this time and telling me my dad’s doing fine so far. The operation moving underway.
“How’s Mark?” I hear myself ask, “I mean… Dr. Love.” I correct myself.
Way too much enthusiasm there, Evelyn.
The dark eyes crease behind the mask, her head tilts to one side. “Uh… Dr. Love is fine too. We all are,” she adds politely slipping out again before I say anything else stupid.
It doesn’t matter though, I don’t mind. Just to hear his name out loud again, knowing he’s helping my dad now.
Everything really will be alright, I can feel it.
The next visitor to the waiting room isn’t so reassuring though.
Another nurse, but carrying a big clipboard with forms I just know without her even saying anything are all about insurance.
Payment.
Money.
Jesus, they haven’t even sewed my dad up and they’re already wanting to give me the bill?
It’s a business though, I guess. And surgeons like Mark don’t work for free.
“Evelyn? I just need to go over some of these insurance forms with you. It looks like you left a lot of blanks, I can help you fill those in-”
“We don’t have insurance, okay?” I hear myself saying loudly, my voice shaking as I wish Mark were here.
I wish dad had just paid his damned insurance like everybody else instead of trying to be a rebel about it all.
The nurse creases a smile, a look she must give folks all the time. “It’s alright, Evelyn, I didn’t realize. We can talk about options once your dad’s feeling better,” she says calmly.
“I’ll come see you once he’s out of surgery…” she adds, giving me the ‘who the hell doesn’t have insurance in this day and age?’ face.
“Thanks,” I whisper hoarsely, feeling suddenly ti
red again, wishing I had a blanket to curl up into on this tiny couch.
Maybe more than just coffee and a magazine rack to distract me too.
I know what I need.
I want Mark. I need him already.
Eventually, I get my wish. With too much coffee having the opposite effect on me, I must flake out eventually.
The feeling of a blanket being pulled over me makes me half-open my eyes dreamily.
It’s Mark, and the brightness of the room from the overhead lights that causes me to registers it’s nighttime outside.
I try to sit up, want to be awake for him, but another part of me wants to sleep forever, have him sit on the couch and watch over me like I know he’s been doing for who knows how long.
Reading my mood, his huge hand rests on my arm and he tells me to rest.
“You’re dad’s gonna be fine,” he tells me, giving a smile as I feel that hand wanting to go places other than my arm.
I’m suddenly wide awake, but eager to do as I’m told as well. Something about Mark’s authority, his complete command of every moment it feels like.
I’d gladly do anything he told me to do. Sleeping and resting with him watching over me? I can handle that.
After a while, I must doze off again, I’m woken by the sounds of another voice wanting to speak with Mark in the hall.
I feel him get up from the couch and I half-open my eyes, noticing him leaving the door ajar so he can still see me while he talks to who I assume is his boss.
If he even has a boss.
“…Patient’s doing well in recovery. Great job Doctor… What I’d like to know is why are you still here, and why are you fawning over your patient’s daughter?” The voice says, keeping it down but almost hissing the last part.
Mark’s strong, deep voice is quick to reply and I catch his eyes for a second. They flash with amusement mixed with annoyance.
“Always flattering to have your praise, John,” he says. “I’m staying back to make sure my patient is in the clear, his bloodwork isn’t great still. I’d like to be here-” he tries to add in but is cut off.
“Your patient doesn’t even have insurance,” the voice hisses again, making my chest ache as it reminds me of all that is happening.
“…I’m running a hospital, Mark. Not a god damned hotel with free fucking cardiac surgery. You’re scheduled to be on a plane at nine a.m. and I’d appreciate it if you went home and got some sleep before you left. Your vacation, remember? I meant what I said, Mark. You need a break, and I think after today maybe you need one more than ever.”
I watch Mark move closer to the door, creasing his mouth as he looks into my eyes and pulls the door closed gently.
I’m dying to know what else he has to say, and who the hell is this other guy anyway?
But Mark’s doing things his way and he doesn’t want me hearing any more talk about insurance or hospital bills, I can tell.
It doesn’t stop me from worrying though. If anything, I feel worse now than before about not being able to afford any of this.
And what’s all this about Mark’s forced vacation?
I just met him, I can’t have him going anywhere. I need him here. And he needs me.
Doesn’t he?
I’ve never been big in the self-confidence stakes, and after today I’m probably more confused than ever.
I know there’s something between Mark and me, I can feel it. But is he really just gonna leave on vacation once he can see my dad’s going to be alright?
He said he’d take care of everything, and that everything was gonna be fine.
Suddenly, in my mind, it doesn’t seem fine.
I feel sick. I want to go home.
I want all this to make sense instead of scaring me like it is right now.
I want that horrible hissing man out there to just go away, to leave Mark and me alone so I can ask him what’s going to happen.
After a long wait, there are no more voices from outside and no Mark either.
Finally, I get up and open the door.
The hallway’s empty.
CHAPTER SIX
Mark
John Carmichael’s a great hospital director. On one hand, I have to agree with everything he’s saying and if it involved anyone else, I’d probably be finishing his sentences for him.
But if it involved anyone else, I wouldn’t be in this situation. I would have checked in on my patient from the plane, teleconferencing anything that came up.
As for insurance, not my problem, right?
But this isn’t just about my patient, nothing to do with the fact it’s Nick Partridge either.
It’s all about Evelyn.
John has me right up to the part where he demands I leave on vacation like I said I would.
But I realize as soon as he reminds me that I can’t do that.
I won’t.
I’m not going anywhere without Evelyn. That much I do know, and I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t want to go on vacation with me seeing as her dad just had his heart rearranged so he might live another twenty-five years.
I can sympathize with my boss’s stance, but anything involving Evelyn from now on is under my protection. Something I find myself insisting on with him.
He’s a smaller guy, but most people are much smaller than me, so it’s only natural I tower over him as I lower my voice to explain how things are gonna be from now on to John.
“If it’s about the bill, John. You can send that to me. I’ll pay it in full, and I’m good for it. You should know that,” I growl, bringing my face closer to his as I watch his eyes shift from anger to confusion to fear in a second.
“Also, the patient? He’s an old buddy of mine. If I’d said so earlier you probably wouldn’t have wanted me to do what I do which is save people’s lives, remember? I’ve brought millions into this hospital John and I don’t appreciate you suddenly demanding I do this and do that just because you say so.”
I’m trying to sound reasonable, trying to be calm. But knowing Evelyn is behind the door, that her old man is us hooked up to a spaghetti junction of tubes and wires.
I can’t help it if my presence gets a little too much for the hospital director. Not surprised when he lets me know I’ve gone too far.
“I… I can end you, Love,” he spits. “Just keep pushing me and see how far you get when I push back,” he snaps, moving in closer to my own face, narrowing his eyes, and making sure he holds my gaze.
A standoff I’m not interested in. I just want Evelyn. Just want her dad to be well again.
“You can add my information to that hospital bill if you want,” I tell him flatly. Meaning every word.
Determined to have a life revolving around Evelyn now, not hospitals.
Knowing how much I need to claim her, to keep her.
That’s all that matters now.
I watch the wheels turn in the director’s mind. He can’t afford to lose his star surgeon, and least of all can’t afford to have me running my mouth about what a dick he was in the end.
It would ruin the hospital and it would ruin him.
Simply by me not being here would have more damaging effects than anything he can threaten me with right now.
On top of all that, there’s a part of me that’s always wondered what sound he’d make if I dropped him off the fourth-floor balcony.
These hands that heal can also hurt. Not that it’s something I want to have to prove to anybody anytime soon. But I hear the man gulp hard as he reminds himself of all these things.
“Just… Take it easy, Mark. It’s been a long day. Go home, go on vacation. I’ll call you in a day or two once we’ve both had some air, okay?” he offers calmly.
But before I can take any air in to even respond, we’re both interrupted.
A nurse at the end of the hall lets me know my patient’s taken a turn for the worse.
“Go,” John says firmly. “But in the morning that patient is being handed over to the relieving
surgical team, got it?” he asks in a warning tone, but I’m already striding past the nurse.
I don’t need Nick Partridge dying on me either. He has to be better so I know Evelyn will be happy.
Her happiness is all that matters to me now.
It’s serious but easily fixed.
Once I calmly explain the benefits of Magnesium over Sodium in a cardiac surgical patient to the sheepish recovery staff, old Nick Partridge starts to look a little better straight away. The beeping from all the machines sounding more like a normal person than a jackpot slot machine on full tilt.
“It’s an easy enough mistake to make,” someone offers me defensively, shrinking back once my eyes dart to theirs.
“It isn’t,” I remind them. “And if you can’t tell the difference between Sodium and Magnesium, I suggest you look for another job,” I add bitterly, hating myself for sounding just like John Carmichael, but angry enough to let it stick.
It would be senseless to lose anyone over such a stupid mistake, especially after working a whole day to operate.
With strict instructions for them to call me if there’s any change in Nick, I turn on my heel and head back to Evelyn in the waiting room.
My heart sinks when I see the empty couch in the waiting room, the blanket tossed to one side.
Instinctively, I go to it, lifting it to my face and struggling to feel her warmth on it any longer, I content myself with the smell of her hair.
It draws a low sound from me, and I’m almost tempted to carry the blanket with me as I turn to go. But I want the real thing.
I’ll find her, and I’ll make sure she doesn’t wander off again from now on.
“Where’s Evelyn Partridge?” I ask the nearest nurse at his station, reminding him she was in waiting room six.
“Oh. She was just here, Doctor, asking for you,” he tells me, making me smile to myself as I feel my brow lifting.
“That so?” I ask him, following his finger as he points which way she went just moments ago. The way I came from myself not so long ago either.
“Thanks,” I tell him, wasting no time in setting out to seek my prize.
I catch up with her just before she reaches the recovery ICU.
She turns to see me long before I feel the need to even call out to her like we already have a built-in radar for each other’s bodies.
Open Heart (Dr. Love): A Steamy Standalone Instalove Romance Page 3