"Lilly, if this doesn't work out between us, promise me you won't go back to someone like Preston. If a guy ever treats you like that again, you dump his ass, okay?"
I smile. "You sound like my brother."
"I mean it. Don't put up with that shit."
I nod.
He kisses my forehead, then smiles slightly. "So was that our first fight?"
"I think so. But it wasn't really a fight. It was a talk we needed to have. You know, I've never really had a serious conversation with someone I've dated."
"I have, but only to break up with the person."
"Let's try to avoid that."
"I agree." He pulls me into his chest and hugs me. I love his hugs. His wide shoulders and strong arms wrap around me and make me feel warm and safe. He lets me go just enough to look at me. "So how was brunch with your family?"
"Good. I told Jade about you. But I told her not to tell my brother. He knows I was out with you last night, but I wouldn't tell him anything more than that. He can't handle me having a boyfriend. He's still getting used to me being away at college. I wish he'd just let me grow up."
"He's just trying to protect you. I'd do the same thing if I had a sister."
"Well, let's see how you like it when he finally meets you and takes you aside and asks you a million questions."
"I can handle it. So do you want to go finish your drawing?"
"Yeah, but not here. Let's go back to that place we went yesterday."
We gather our supplies and return to the same spot. He helps me with my drawing, showing me how to highlight the texture on the rock to make it look smooth and worn down from the waves.
Later, we lie down on a sleeping bag and listen to the roar of the ocean. We kiss, but he doesn't push me to do more. I wouldn't mind doing more, but not out here in the open where someone could catch us.
On the way back to campus we stop for dinner, and by the time I get back to my room I'm feeling happy and excited and like nothing can bring me down. But then my mom calls. I see her name on my phone and get nervous. Bad nervous. She never calls, especially this time of night. It's eight here, which means it's eleven her time.
"Hi, Mom," I say. "Why are you calling so late?"
"It's Mother, not Mom." She clears her throat. "Hello, Lilly. I am calling because I would like you to come here for Christmas this year."
I haven't had Christmas with her since I was six. My parents divorced when I was seven and it happened at Christmas. I was devastated, but instead of being there for me, my mom took off and spent the holiday with her sister in Paris. I haven't had the holidays with her since.
"I always spend Christmas with Dad."
"Yes. So it's time for you to spend it with your mother. Your father has had enough holidays with you."
All year long I look forward to the holidays. Rachel and I always decorate the house the day after Thanksgiving and Jade and Garret come over and we all do the tree. Then the following day, we go to Garret's house and decorate. On Christmas Eve, everyone comes to our house and we watch movies and make popcorn and stay up late and then spend Christmas day together. It's my favorite time of year and there's no way I'm going to miss it and spend the holiday being yelled at by my mom.
"I can't be there for Christmas. How about January? I'll still be on winter break. I could come out there after New Year's."
"You don't want to spend Christmas with your mother?" She sounds overly dramatic as she fakes being hurt. Even so, I feel a twinge of pain in my chest, not wanting her to feel bad. Why does she get to me this way?
"It's just that I'm used to having the holidays with Dad. And Abi and Hannah and the boys would be really sad if I wasn't here at Christmas."
"You're more concerned about your half brother's children than about your own mother?" She huffs. "I guess you don't love me after all."
"Mother, that's not fair. Of course I love you, but why can't I come see you in January?"
"Family should be together at the holidays, and I have been without my daughter at Christmas for years."
That's because she's never invited me before now.
"I'm sorry, Mother, but I can't this year."
She lets out an angry sigh. "Then I want you here the day after Christmas. We'll postpone our holiday for you."
"You don't have to do that. Just go ahead and have it."
"We will have Christmas when you arrive. And there's an event that night we will be going to. And two that weekend."
"What events?"
"We'll discuss it later. I'll provide you with the proper attire."
"Mother, I need to talk to Dad before I—"
"So what have you been doing? Are you still seeing that young man? What was his name?"
"Preston. And no, we're not dating anymore."
"What was wrong with him?"
"He didn't treat me well."
"I'm sure a young man like him has been trained in the proper etiquette for courting a young woman."
"He bought me flowers and a bracelet and took me out to eat, but spending money on me doesn't make him a good boyfriend."
"Lilly, you expect far too much from a man. Buying you nice things is the way men show their affection for you."
"I don't need them to buy me nice things. If I want something, I have my own money. Preston didn't care about me. I fell and hurt myself and Preston didn't even notice until he saw some other guy helping me. And we went to a party and he—"
"I don't have time to listen to your whining. And the fact that you're doing so over such frivolous matters concerns me. You don't need a man to coddle you when you fall."
"Yes, but a guy can still act like he cares. And he shouldn't be pushing me to do things I'm not ready for."
"Lilly, I have told you repeatedly that men expect certain things. If you don't give them those things, they will leave you."
"I disagree."
"Because you're a naive child who doesn't understand how the world works."
That's one of her favorite lines to use whenever I don't agree with her.
"It's late," I say, trying to end the conversation. "I'm sure you need to get to bed."
"I will plan on you arriving here the day after Christmas and staying through the New Year."
Arguing with her wouldn't change her mind so I tell her goodnight and we end the call. I text my dad and tell him we need to talk. He calls right away.
"What is it, honey? Is everything okay?"
"Not really. Mom just called. She's making me go there the day after Christmas and stay there through New Year's."
"She can't make you do anything."
"She wouldn't listen to me. You know how she gets. Will you talk to her? Please?"
"Yes, but Lilly, you need to start standing up to her. It's okay to tell her no."
"She doesn't accept it, at least not when I say it. She only listens to you."
"I understand that, but you need to start telling her no. When she doesn't listen I'll intervene, but she needs to hear it from you first. She can't keep telling you what to do."
It's true, but telling her no never works.
"So she wants you there the day after Christmas?" he asks.
"Yes. And the entire next week. She wants me to go to some event the day I get there and two more that weekend."
He sighs heavily. "Of course she does."
"What's wrong?"
"Honey, I don't want you to feel bad but you need to know this."
"Know what?"
"Your mother asked you to come there that week because there are several prominent society events occurring during that time. The night after Christmas there's a benefit for the opera that your mother and I used to go to. It's a very exclusive event and she hasn't been invited to it since our divorce. Her husband's political connections must have secured her an invitation this year and now she wants you to go with her."
"Why?"
"Because photographers will be there and she wants to ensure she makes
the society pages. People aren't interested in your mother or your stepfather. They're interested in you. A Kensington. Your mother's only chance of being photographed is if you're by her side. The same is true for the other events that week. She's trying to make her way back into high society and she's using you to do it. I'm sorry to tell you that, honey, but you have to see this for what it is."
Part of me really thought my mom just wanted to spend time with me. But I should've known she was just using me.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
"What else did your mother say?" my dad asks.
"Not much, other than to give me her usual dating advice."
"Garret mentioned you were seeing someone."
"I just started dating him. It's not serious."
"Garret said you'd been out with two young men."
I roll my eyes. "Do you guys have to talk about this? It's embarrassing."
"You know I only ask because I don't want someone taking advantage of you because of your name."
"I know, but he's not doing that."
"Did your mother meet one of these young men when she was there? Is that why she was giving you advice?"
"She didn't meet him, but we talked about him. He's not the guy I'm seeing now. It was the first guy I dated. We only went out a few times, but I didn't like him so I ended it."
"What's his name?"
I roll my eyes again. "Dad, it doesn't matter. I'm not dating him anymore."
"I would still like to know his name."
"Preston Litchfield."
"Wyatt's son? Wyatt Litchfield? I believe his son's name is Preston."
"I don't know. His dad owns some investment firm in New York."
"That's him. We've spoken at various charity events but I haven't seen Wyatt in years."
"Well, his son goes here and he keeps trying to go out with me even after I told him I'm not interested."
"Who is this new person you're seeing?"
I might as well tell him. If I don't, he'll find out some other way. "His name is Reed Ashford. He's from LA. You wouldn't have heard of him. He's not rich."
"But he goes to Camsburg? That's a very expensive school."
"His dad is a tour manager for bands and I guess he makes decent money. His dad wasn't really in his life growing up but he gave Reed money for school. Reed also works here on campus."
"When can I meet him?"
"I don't know. Maybe parents' weekend? You're not going to have your security guys do background checks on him, are you?"
"Lilly, you know how this works. We can't just bring anyone into our lives. If you continue to date him, I will most likely look into his background."
"Then I might as well tell you this. Reed's mom is in rehab. She's an alcoholic and she doesn't have a job so Reed has to use his college money to take care of her."
"Lilly, if he's desperate for money then—"
"I know what you're thinking, but he's not dating me for my money."
"When you have our kind of money, people often lie and tell you what you want to hear."
"I knew I shouldn't have told you. I knew you'd judge him for being poor."
"That is not what I'm doing. I would check his background regardless of his financial status. If you were still dating Preston, I would check on him as well. Honey, I have another call coming in and it's one I need to answer. Can I call you back later?"
"Don't worry about it. I'll just talk to you later this week."
We say goodbye and I check my phone and notice Reed sent me a text.
Check outside your door.
I get excited, thinking he's here, but when I open my door, the hall is empty.
I send him a text back. I don't get it. You're not here.
You were hoping it'd be me?
Well, yeah.
I got you something sweeter. Look down.
On the floor outside my room is a giant bag of licorice. I text him back. Thank you.
Something to help you study. Quiz on Tuesday in seminar.
I haven't started studying yet. My mom called.
You ok? Want to talk about it?
Not really. I need to study.
If you change your mind, call me. See you tomorrow.
I take the licorice into my room. It's one of those small gestures that make me like Reed even more. It shows he's thinking about me and reminds me of the night of the party, when we sat on the porch and ate licorice and talked.
Reed continues to do sweet gestures the rest of the week, leaving small gifts at my door. The best gift was a CD that had one of his covers on it. I listened to the CD. It was hard rock with a lot of yelling, so not my taste. But I took the cover from the case and hung it on my wall.
"You can't keep leaving me gifts," I tell Reed.
It's Friday night and we just got back from dinner. I've been going to his room every night to hang out, but tonight we're in mine.
"You don't like my gifts?" We're on my bed and he's sitting up against the wall, his arm around me.
"Your gifts are awesome, but you can't leave me one every night for the rest of the year."
"You're right. It's too predictable. Instead of leaving one every night, I'll surprise you. You'll never know when they're coming."
"I'd rather you be the surprise."
"You already see me every night." He kisses my cheek. "And every day. Except this weekend I have to go to LA."
He'd mentioned this earlier in the week but wasn't sure if he was going.
"When are you leaving?"
"Tonight. My mom's getting out of rehab first thing tomorrow and I need to pick her up."
"Reed, that's a long drive. You need to get going."
"I'm not ready to." He tilts my head up and kisses me.
"Good," I whisper. "Because I'm not ready for you to go."
He grips my waist as his tongue slips past my lips. I put my hand behind his neck, pulling myself closer, and as I do, my shirt rides up. Reed's hand brushes against my skin, sending a tingle down my core.
We've still only kissed and I never get tired of it, but I want to do more. I tug at the bottom of his t-shirt, wanting to feel his bare chest. He reaches behind his neck and yanks his shirt off. My hands slide over his smooth skin, his muscular chest, his lean abs.
"Can I?" he asks, his fingers held over the top button of my shirt.
I nod, and continue kissing him. I think he knows how inexperienced I am when it comes to guys. I think he also knows I'm a virgin. I hinted at it, but I think he already knew. I told him I haven't dated much and that the few relationships I had in high school didn't last long. Plus, girls with more experience wouldn't take things this slow.
We break from the kiss and I lift up on my knees so he can reach the lower buttons. He kisses my chest as he undoes the last one, then slides my shirt off my shoulders and down my arms.
His lips move slowly up my neck as he cups my breast.
"Take it off," I say softly.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah."
He unhooks my bra and I toss it aside. He lies down on the bed, taking me with him. He draws our bodies together as our lips collide, his fingers tangling in my hair.
I'm completely breathless as I try to take in all the different sensations; the feel of his warm chest against mine, the feel of his kiss, his breath, his hands.
I lie on my back, and he follows, hovering over me. He trails kisses down my neck, my chest, until his mouth lands on my breast. I let out a soft moan just as his cell phone rings.
"Shit," he whispers, his head lifting as he reaches for his phone on my nightstand.
"Go ahead and answer it."
"It's my uncle. I'll call him back later. He's just calling to see when I'll be there. I'm staying at his house tonight."
"You should get going. It'll take over three hours to get there, maybe four with traffic."
"I know." He lays his head on my stomach. "I just don't want to go."
I stroke his hair, my fingers t
ousling the soft waves.
"It's dangerous driving at night. I don't want you getting in an accident."
"I won't." He kisses my stomach.
My eyes shut, and I take a breath. "Don't do that or I won't let you leave."
"We should've started this earlier."
"Maybe we could continue where we left off when you get back."
"Definitely." He gives me a kiss, then gets off the bed, grabbing his shirt.
I find my bra and put it on. "When are you coming back?"
"I'm not sure yet. Depends on what disaster I go home to." He puts his shirt on. "I can't keep doing this. My uncle needs to step up and take over, at least until I get through college."
"I'm sorry you have to deal with all this."
He leans down and kisses me. "I'm sorry you have to have a boyfriend with so much baggage."
"Everyone has baggage." My shirt's on now and I stand up to button it, but he does it for me.
"I'm the one who messed it up," he says, his fingers over the top button. "I might as well fix it." When he's done, he hugs me. "I'll call you when I get there."
After he leaves, I miss him. It's going to be a long weekend without him. Willow already left to help her parents run their booth at an organic foods convention and Taylor will be off playing golf.
The next day I do homework for English and some reading for my art classes. By evening I'm bored and decide to call Jade.
"Hi, Lilly," Jade answers, sounding out of breath.
"Is this a bad time?"
"I'm trying to get the kids to bed, but Miles took off down the hall. I got him now. Go ahead."
"I was just calling to say hi."
"Can you talk to Garret? Now Ethan's running off."
Before I can answer, I hear Garret. "What's going on?"
"Nothing here, but it sounds like you've got a circus going on there."
"It's always a circus. You'll find out when you have kids."
"I'm not going to have four."
"Jade and I didn't think we would either. So you going out tonight with that Reed guy?"
"So Jade told you his name? Did she tell you anything else about him?"
"No. But Dad did."
"I swear, you guys need to stop talking about me when I'm not around."
"Is he there right now? That guy?"
Lilly: A Kensington Family Novel Page 14