Love is a Lyric (Rockstars Anonymous)

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Love is a Lyric (Rockstars Anonymous) Page 19

by Michelle MacQueen


  The rumors about his cheating, the pictures of his kiss with Piper, had done more harm than he’d known.

  He ran a hand through his hair and pushed out a breath. “So, we’re talking about this now?”

  Conner shrugged. “Look, what I did… it wasn’t right, and I’m sorry. I wasn’t in a good place, but that’s no excuse. Quinn and I… we weren’t in love, only lonely.”

  Lonely. Ben’s girlfriend had been lonely. “I’m sorry too. If I’d been a better friend to you both…”

  “No, don’t do that. Don’t take the blame for our betrayal. Ben, you’re good in a way neither me nor Quinn can hope to live up to. This engagement… are you sure it’s what you want?”

  No. He didn’t want it at all, but the label threatened to pull their deal. Some morality clause BS. A fact he hadn’t told anyone other than Quinn. “It has to be.” He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, desperate to talk to Conner like he used to, to share everything. Every thought. Every memory he couldn’t get out of his head.

  “Do you really believe that? You don’t plan on actually getting married, do you?”

  He hadn’t thought that far ahead. The fame of Fate was in part due to the love story between the two leads that the world clamored for. A wedding would solidify the band’s standing. It would be a giant affair. “I don’t know.”

  “She doesn’t love you.”

  “Yeah.”

  He paused, lowering his voice. “You don’t love her.”

  A shiver raced up Ben’s spine as he buried his face in his hands. “I don’t know what to do.”

  “I’m going to show you something." He pulled his phone out. “I know you and Quinn have been on your weird internet hiatus while in the songwriting cave she calls this big fancy loft, but a couple weeks ago, there was a video that went sort of viral.” He held out the phone.

  Ben took it, his eyes trying to register the video on the screen. He recognized the pub right away. Tommy looked into the camera. “Okay, world, I need you to see a special girl. She doesn’t want fame or to be a singer, but she has the kind of talent you see few times in your life.” The video focused back on the empty stage.

  “Ben?” Quinn walked into the room, and Ben paused the video. “I have a new—” She stopped when she caught sight of Ben and Conner side by side—a rare sight of late. “What are you guys doing?”

  Conner grinned. “This is something you should see too.”

  Skepticism flashed across her face, and she narrowed her eyes but didn’t argue as she sat on the other side of Ben.

  “What is that place?” she asked.

  Ben didn’t take his eyes from the screen as he hit play. “It’s magic.” That’s the only way he could describe the feeling of standing on that very stage next to Piper, of hearing her sing for the first time.

  After a moment, a familiar figure stepped up onto the stage and sat at the piano.

  “I didn’t know she played piano.” Conner’s voice held a note of awe.

  Quinn released a breath. “My mom used to play. She taught us both.”

  Ben tore his eyes from the screen to stare at Quinn for a moment. “You play?”

  “I used to. Not since my parents died. But Piper, she’s made of music.”

  He hadn’t known that either, not before their trip back to Ohio. How could she keep such an integral part of her hidden? Why did she want to?

  Piper leaned into the mic, and her voice soared straight through Ben. He’d heard it in his mind over the weeks, but the reality was better.

  “This song is called Looking for You.”

  Quinn sucked in a harsh breath, but none of them moved as they sat enthralled by the woman who’d once been a part of them. Was Fate whole without her?

  As she began the first verse, he knew the answer to his question. Fate might be whole, but Ben Evans definitely was not. Quinn reached over to thread her fingers through his, her grip tightening.

  Some days,

  I wonder if you’re there.

  But wishes are only memories.

  On and on the lyrics went in their heartbreaking melody. It was the kind of song that broke and healed and everything in between.

  Emotion packed each word, seeping out from the girl swaying at the piano, her face obscured.

  As the song drew to a close, Tommy appeared on screen again. “Told you.”

  The video cut to black, but still, Ben couldn’t move. An icon at the bottom told him the video had been viewed over a million times.

  Conner took his phone out of Ben’s grip. “Did we know she could do that?”

  Quinn shook her head, tears dancing in her eyes.

  “I did.” Ben couldn’t get out more than a whisper as the words of her song rolled back through his mind. There was something he couldn’t put his finger on.

  A familiarity.

  As if on auto-pilot, he stood and crossed the open room to the island counter separating the kitchen. His eyes found the messy pile of papers they’d left there, songs Quinn had finished that needed Ben’s music.

  He leafed through the papers until his eyes landed on the title that could change everything. It made no sense.

  Looking for You

  A song Quinn wrote last week. “Quinn.” He didn’t turn to face her. “I thought you’d barely talked to Piper this week.”

  Quinn stepped up beside him, her entire body going still as her gaze found the page he held. “I haven’t.”

  She reached for the song, the diamond ring he’d been forced to give her reflecting the lights hanging over the counter.

  “Yet you’re sending her our songs?” It made no sense. He didn’t think Piper would want anything to do with Fate anymore. That small knowledge she was still interested in their music gave him a spark of hope.

  A spark that diminished too quickly. “Oh, crap.” The video had over a million hits. “What was she thinking?” Fate couldn’t release the song now. He dropped the music to the counter and paced across the living room before turning and walking back. “Piper knows this business.” He didn’t want to think she’d done this to purposefully hurt him. “Please, Quinn, tell me she wouldn’t do this.” For what? To get back at him? He thought of the silence coming from his family. Had they known? Approved? Was stealing one of Fate’s better songs from this new album payback for the engagement?

  Even as he thought the words, he knew they weren’t true. That wasn’t Piper.

  “Stop moving!” Quinn’s yell reverberated through the room.

  Conner joined them, and they were three points of a triangle, none working without the other.

  “Quinn.” Conner looked from Ben to Quinn. “It’s time, don’t you think?”

  A sob escaped the normally unaffected Quinn, an icy woman who didn’t let emotions affect her. And then another. Tears tracked down her cheeks, and Ben couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen her cry.

  Ben couldn’t take it. He pulled her into a hug, marveling at how she no longer seemed to fit perfectly against him. He’d once let the music trick him into believing they were made for each other. Now, she felt foreign in his arms.

  And still, he didn’t let go. No matter what happened between them, he’d always care about her.

  He rested his chin on her head. “What do you need to tell me? Is this about Piper?”

  She nodded against him and pulled back. “But first…” She worked the ring down her finger and held it out. “We should never have agreed to the label’s idea.”

  He took the ring and stared down at it.

  “What idea?” Conner’s eyes narrowed, and he didn’t wait for them to answer. “No, you guys… You let them bully you into an engagement?”

  Ben sighed. “We didn’t see another way. They threatened to drop us if we didn’t fix our PR problem.”

  “So?” Conner stared at them. “We let them. Though, that’s not going to happen as long as we have Piper’s songs. We hold the power here. You can’t let them—”

>   “Conner,” Quinn cut him off, her expression pained.

  Ben couldn’t breathe. Piper’s songs.

  Piper’s songs.

  Conner didn’t stop. “Fate can survive the golden couple’s break up. We’re about the music. I just don’t want you to have to—”

  “Conner!” Quinn fixed her wide eyes on Ben. “Shut up for a moment.”

  “No.” Ben lifted his gaze to hers. “Conner you need to tell me what you meant. Right now.”

  “Well, you and Quinn—”

  “Not about us,” he growled. “Piper.”

  His face flushed. “Oh shizznit, I didn’t mean to say that.”

  “Conner.”

  “Yeah, yeah, fine, but I really think it’s something Quinn should explain. I only found out recently.”

  The air charged around them, electricity sparking off Ben’s gaze, his words. And Quinn? She’d never looked so small.

  A shuddering breath pushed past her lips. “I don’t want you to hate me.”

  Those words deflated something inside him, and he reached for her hand. His free hand landed on Conner’s shoulder, connecting them all to each other. “Whatever is going on, Fate will survive it. I’m sorry I disappeared after what happened, and I know you two are sorry for hurting me. That’s past. But it’s time for honesty. We never used to keep anything from each other. Whatever it is, this band will be okay.”

  Quinn shook her head and stepped away from them, her lips quivering as she tried to speak. “You’re wrong, Benji. I’ve always kept something from you.”

  She hadn’t called him Benji since they were kids, teenagers dreaming of the kind of lives they now lived, the kind that no longer seemed to matter. He didn’t speak, only waited.

  Quinn stepped around him and walked back into the living room, sinking into a leather recliner that kept her apart from Ben and Conner.

  Conner put a hand on Ben’s arm. “You need to listen to everything before you get mad.”

  Ben’s steps echoed off the gleaming marble floors as he approached the couch, letting himself sit so all energy could flow to his overloaded mind.

  Piper’s music.

  He needed Quinn to say it, to tell him what she’d done.

  Even if he’d already begun to guess.

  Quinn brushed a hand through her blond hair before dropping it to her lap and clenching her other fingers around it.

  Ben felt the ring in his palm, remembering a time he’d dreamed of giving it to Quinn. That was the future he’d seen for himself, one without choice. The music dictated who he loved.

  He knew now fate was only a fantasy.

  “It started when I was visiting Piper about six years ago.” Quinn dropped her gaze, not looking at them. “That’s when I heard it. The song.” She closed her eyes as if calling the lyrics forth. “Come to me, I beg of you. Love me for eternity.”

  “Fate,” he breathed. The song they’d ended up naming their band after, the one that got them a record deal and everything else they could have wanted in life. Lyrics Quinn claimed she wrote.

  “What do you mean you heard it?” He already knew, but he needed her to say it out loud, to let him know the thoughts rolling through his head weren’t crazy. The Quinn he’d thought he’d known wouldn’t do this, would she?

  “She was only fifteen. I told myself she had no need to keep it to herself.” She finally met his gaze, and he knew the next words would tear him right open. “By the time she found out I took it, she wasn’t even mad. She saw that YouTube video and was proud of me, of us. She wanted to make me happy. She always did.”

  That was the Piper he’d come to know, the one always thinking about everyone else. Except this time, she hadn’t thought of him. It wasn’t only Quinn who’d lied to him all these years.

  “Keep going,” Conner prodded.

  “There’s more?” Ben met Conner’s sad eyes.

  Quinn’s back shook as she buried her face in her hands. “There’s a lot more.” She didn’t say anything else for a long moment before lifting a tear-stained face. “All of them.”

  “All of—” Ben shot to his feet. “All of them?” He didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry or to rage at Quinn. “You’ve stolen every song we’ve recorded from your sister?” From Piper.

  “I didn’t steal them.” Her voice was weak. “Piper agreed to it. She never wanted to be a singer. I didn’t even know she still played piano. But she believed in her words and let me broadcast them.”

  “While claiming they were your own.” His thoughts went in a thousand different directions before finally landing on one path. All this time, he’d pushed himself into loving Quinn because his music needed her lyrics, because the words spoke to something inside him.

  And they were Piper’s.

  “I know.” Quinn stood. “I’m an awful person. It probably won’t surprise you that the songs I’ve let you see for the new album are ones Piper never wanted me to use, or that I’ve said awful things to her, treated her terribly. And that’s my cross to bear.” She advanced on Ben. “But I know you, Ben, and I know that look on your face.”

  “What look?” He thought back on the conversations with Piper where he’d revealed his ideas about fate and how he’d fallen in love with Quinn because of the music. She hadn’t said a word as her lies built up and up.

  Quinn jabbed him in the chest with a finger, fire replacing the tears in her eyes. “I have spent years being loved only for my music, never for me. You think I didn’t know, but I could feel it, Ben.” She put a hand over her heart. “Right here.”

  Conner’s lonely comment made much more sense now. Quinn had always known.

  “I won’t let the same thing happen to Piper. She has always taken care of me, and now it’s my turn. You will not fall in love with her because of her words. She is good, Ben. The kind of person who doesn’t belong in our world.”

  “I know.” Also the person who’d lied to him again and again. He knew fate didn’t choose his path anymore. There was no connection between his music and her lyrics. “I need to… I don’t know if I can do this.”

  Quinn reached for him, but he stepped back. “You said we’d survive anything.”

  He’d thought they would, that Fate was bigger than the issues between them. But then, she’d spoken words that cracked something inside him, something intrinsic to who he was. It was like the cord connecting his music to Piper’s words snapped, leaving him adrift without the directions to call him home.

  Once upon a time, this band was his home.

  But it was all a lie. Their success, their careers, their music.

  He stumbled back away from his bandmates, his best friends, knowing if he walked out the door, nothing would be the same. Not this time.

  His back hit the door, and he reached for the table beside it to take his keys. “Fate doesn’t exist, Quinn.” He didn’t know whether he meant the idea of fate or the band that wouldn’t exist without Piper. “It’s time to stop pretending it does.”

  27

  Piper

  A tour with Fate didn’t hold a candle to going on tour with Drew Stone. The crowds, the fans, the constant energy.

  It filled her days, giving her a singular focus that took her mind from everything else.

  The first week flew by in a series of concerts and meet and greets. Drew wasn’t as much into the parties as Fate had been, preferring instead quiet hangouts with his crew and dancers.

  And Piper loved every minute of it.

  She followed Drew through his soundcheck, grinning from the sidelines as he finished the song for the empty Bridgestone Arena in Nashville. Most people thought of Nashville as the country mecca, but Drew and Noah’s concert sold out in a single day.

  Rock over country any day.

  Drew flashed her a grin as he sauntered from the stage.

  “Everything good?” she asked, hugging her clipboard to her chest.

  “Peachy.”

  “Good.” She looked down at the clipboard
. “Noah and his band will take the stage next for their check. They’re going on after you tonight.” They stopped by a table laden with food.

  Drew reached for a sub, but Piper slapped his hand away and handed him a bottle of water.

  He grumbled something about mean assistants.

  Piper lifted a brow. “Sure, eat it. I’m not your mom. But Matt tells me if you eat before a concert, you get serious stomach issues.”

  “I should fire him.”

  “Good thing he already quit for a better job.”

  “There is no better job than working for me.” He winked.

  Piper laughed. So far, she couldn’t say he was wrong. It was a completely different world from following Quinn around. There was no laundry, no coffee runs, no mean words Piper had to pretend to let slide right off her. Instead, she felt… respected for the first time in her short career.

  “Come on.” Piper pulled him away from the table. “You need to shower if you’re going to make it to the meet and greet.”

  “Are you saying I stink?”

  “Yes.”

  He laughed. “Matt was never this mean to me.”

  She shrugged but didn’t respond.

  “What meet and greet is this again?”

  “Make a Wish. This kid wanted nothing more than to meet his idol, Drew Stone. Lord knows I have no idea why.”

  He elbowed her, and she laughed.

  “You, Noah, and Jo are due backstage two hours before the concert.”

  “Sure, sure. Wouldn’t miss this one. I’m going back to the hotel for a spell to nap.” He skipped away from her—yes, skipped. Her boss was ridiculous.

  “Don’t forget the shower,” she called after him.

  Tucking the clipboard under her arm, she walked through the arena, saying hello to people with a smile and quick dip of her head. She could be content on this tour, happy even. After a concert in St. Louis, they’d piled into buses to make their way to the music capital of the country.

  Next, they were off to Cincinnati for a couple days and the promise of seeing Chase. He was driving down from Columbus, but she suspected it was mostly to get backstage at a Drew Stone concert.

 

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