by Amber Jaeger
He pulled me in too close and started swinging me around in big, loopy circles. “This is a great song,” he shouted in my ear, “perfect for our first date.”
I didn’t recognize the song but it seemed to be about more than romance. Uncomfortable, I tried to worm out of his grasp. When that didn’t work, I tried to at least slow his erratic dancing to a gentle swoon. But when he turned his face towards mine, trying to come in for a kiss, I almost threw up.
“Have you been drinking?” I asked, jerking my face away from his.
Brent gave a big, stupid grin. “How did you know?”
“You reek! What were you drinking, vinegar?”
“Wild Turkey and Dr. Pepper. What? You should try it, maybe you’d loosen up a little,” he said with a nasty grin.
I gritted my teeth and shoved him away from me. Without bothering to even look for Lincoln, I ran down the stairs and out the front door. Across the parking lot and street was the beach and I didn’t stop until I hit the water’s edge. The moon was full and lovely, the water sparkling in its light.
I glared at it all and whipped off my shoes, heading south along the water. Furious, I kicked wet sand ahead of me, storming down the shore. That felt familiar and so did the heavy sand weighing down my feet. My own anger drained my energy, finally leaving me defenseless against my real feelings.
I was hurt.
I refused to stop and cry, so instead I just slowed to a crawl and bawled my eyes out while making my way home.
Knowing that everyone knew about my crush on Brent last year was humiliating and almost as bad was knowing he wouldn’t even speak to me because he didn’t consider me pretty enough. It definitely wasn’t me he was interested in now, just my new, unasked for looks.
And I could no longer even guess what Jordan was interested in. Sometimes I felt like his math tutor and other times his love interest. Not that I thought I was or wasn’t his girlfriend, I just didn’t think he had other ... math tutors.
But clearly I wasn’t special to him, the girl in the market proved that. My face burned with embarrassment and even though the night was a total disaster, I was glad I had at least tried to go on a date with a boy. Better than staying home to daydream over a guy who clearly didn’t feel like I had hoped he did. Or thought he did. Or whatever. Not to mention him attacking me and his human hating uncle and being chased by God knew what. I fumed over all of that for a few minutes but still ended up crying again.
Because Brent and Jordan put together couldn’t hurt me half as badly as Lincoln had.
Despondent, I trenched off the beach when I came to my neighborhood. Linc wasn’t home yet and I doubted he had even noticed me gone. Dad and Grandma were in bed and I was grateful for the silence. Most grandmothers or fathers would be alarmed by someone coming home teary-eyed and early from a dance, but I had no one that cared, or was able to even get what they were supposed to care about.
Battling a fresh bout of tears, I pulled off Celia’s slutty dress, climbed into bed and pulled the covers over my head. “Please God, just let me sleep and not dream tonight,” I prayed.
Chapter 15
I WOKE UP DRY EYED in the fortress.
Curiously, Ash wasn’t in the room but she had left a frothy magenta gown at the end of my bed. I eyed it with a low burn of resentment and pawed through the huge wardrobe. My head swam with the same anger and hurt feelings as before I fell asleep and I began to wonder, did the other girl wear the same dresses? Where was her room? Was this her room?
A severe black dress with no decoration was shoved to the back and slightly wrinkled. “Perfect,” I thought.
Not bothering to brush my hair or wipe my gritty eyes, I wandered out of the room. With a dull curiosity, I slowed to inspect all the closed doors I passed. The hall my room was on was always silent, with all its doors shut. Soon I was imagining a different girl for each door.
Jordan wasn’t in the main hallway or the ballroom or the library. Like everyone in my world, the people of his world didn’t bother to even acknowledge me so I couldn’t even ask anyone if they knew where he was.
Ash came careening around a corner near the kitchens with a pot of steaming water and torn rags. “Oh, you’re here,” she said, rushing past me. “Come on.”
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“Jordan’s favorite dog is going to have her puppies soon,” she called over her shoulder. A long cool hallway off the main room led to a breezeway and back into another building. It smelled off fresh hay and wet dog. The first kennel was spacious and filled with straw and toys and food. Jordan was curled up in the corner next to a monstrous dog.
“Oh good grief,” I muttered. “Can’t any of the pets here be normal sized?”
Jordan looked up from stroking satiny black ears the size of my hand. “She’s considered to be normal sized for her breed. And she’s not a pet, not like you humans consider dogs to be.”
“Uh huh,” I said, staring pointedly at the toys and ropes of rawhide.
“This is a hunting dog, the best one I’ve ever bred.”
I found that hard to believe, it looked like it would rip prey into pieces. “And what do you hunt with it?” My voice was sharp but he failed to get my underlying anger.
Jordan shrugged, not looking at me. “Other djinn.”
“Okay,” I said, wheeling around. “I’m done.”
“It’s not like what you humans consider as murder.”
I turned back around. “You preface a lot of what you say with that, ‘you humans.’”
He opened his mouth but shut it again when the door slammed open and banged closed. A giant man came to lean against the doorway of the kennel, the apple he was eating looking tiny in his huge hands. He easily towered over Jordan, his shoulders twice as wide. While Jordan had short, dark waves, this man’s matted hair dropped in blond knots down his back. His face was scarred and one eye was a curious milky blue. “How’s your bitch?” he asked Jordan, looking at me.
“I think just tired,” Jordan said, not noticing the slight or my red face. He didn’t look up but said, “Bixby, this is my uncle, David. He and I talked and everything is okay.”
“Really,” I murmured, not liking the way his uncle leered at me.
“You two have fun making puppies,” David said and snapped his apple in two with one savage bite. He sauntered out the door, looking over his shoulder once to glare at me.
“Well, he seems like a total jerk,” I said as soon as I heard the door slam shut again.
Jordan looked up, surprised. “Why?”
“Um, I don’t know, he’s creepy and rude? Is it just me he hates, or women, or humans in general?”
“He doesn’t hate you. Or humans. He just thinks we should stay separate.”
“Maybe he’s right,” I said, trying to layer on the meaning.
“I don’t think so,” Jordan replied, still stroking his dog’s head. “I enjoy your company.”
My angry outburst could wait no longer. “Really? As much as your other human girlfriends’ company?”
His hand stilled and he looked up slowly. “Excuse me?”
I was furious with myself that out of everything that had happened, that was what was bothering me the most. “You know, the other girls you somehow tricked into chains. Or just one other, I don’t really know, I only saw the blonde one.”
A very faint blush crept up from under his collar. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about, but I didn’t trick you. We made an agreement.”
“Oh come on!” I snapped. “I saw her, at the market, before you snatched her away. She had bracelets and chains—just like these!” I shoved them under his nose.
A laugh that could crumble mountains boomed around the kennel and to my intense anger and embarrassment Jordan’s uncle came back around the corner from where he had been eavesdropping.
“You think you’re the only human pet?” he asked, his chest still heaving with laughter.
“Uncle, stay out of this,” Jordan sa
id coldly.
“Oh no, let him have his say,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest. It didn’t make me feel any less intimidated.
“You’re a pet, an amusement, as much to him as this pretty dog is,” David said, leaning further in with each word.
I could feel my face getting redder but my eyes weren’t watering up. Yet.
“That isn’t true, she’s not a pet and there aren’t any others,” Jordan said.
His uncle shrugged.”You hid her from me so well, maybe there are, maybe there aren’t.”
“Bixby, look at me,” Jordan pleaded.”There isn’t anyone else; I don’t know who it was you saw.”
I turned to look at him, taking in his pleading eyes and pale face. Despite my anger, I believed him and so my temper turned towards his uncle.
“Maybe she was yours,” I accused. “You seem to hate us humans so much; maybe you keep one around for torture.”
His face twisted in a sneer. “You humans are fragile, powerless, temporary. I have no use for one.”
“She had to come from somewhere,” I suggested, shrugging my shoulders. “And my world is in your backyard, as Jordan puts it. Who else would she belong to? Maybe you have a secret soft spot for us humans.”
“Our world is bigger than you know,” he said. “You think you know so much about us because you read some book? You think you know anything about me?” His sneer melted into a cold grin. “Well, I know something you don’t know. But you should ask Jordan, maybe he’ll tell you.”
“Uncle,” Jordan breathed.
“What?” I asked, suddenly unsure of myself. “Ask him what?”
“Uncle, don’t,” Jordan seethed.
I looked from David to Jordan, each red faced and glaring and knew I wasn’t going to like what was said.
David turned back to me, his cold little grin in place again. “Ask him where your brother was.”
My nervous fidgeting stilled. “I know where he was. He was wandering around lost.”
“Not in this world. But don’t worry, Jordan was keeping him safe.”
“Ye-es,” I said uncertainly. “He found him, he brought him back to me, safe. That was the agreement.”
David barked out a laugh. “Well, how convenient! The girl Jordan’s been pining after suddenly needs a superhuman favor? Who better to grant it than one who can meld worlds and twist reality? And the only thing he wanted in return was to make you a prisoner.”
My whole body felt numb but I was able to turn toward Jordan. “What is he saying?” I whispered.
“Nothing!” he said vehemently, getting to his feet. “It’s nothing; we’ve already talked about it—”
“Did you have something to do with my brother being missing?” I asked, my lips numb and cold.
“Get out!” Jordan suddenly raged at his uncle.
David put a hand on Jordan’s shoulder, which he roughly pushed aside. “It’s for the best this way.”
“It isn’t! I’m sorry it didn’t work out for you but stop trying to ruin what I have!” he yelled.
“It won’t end well,” his uncle said quietly. “It never does with them.”
“Get out,” Jordan replied just as quietly.
David gave me a strangely apologetic look then left the room. We were both silent and still for a long moment, listening to his footsteps echo up the long hallway.
Finally, not turning towards Jordan, I asked, “What the hell is going on?”
Out of the corner of my eye, I could see him run both hands through his hair and over his face. “I’m not sure.”
“Wrong, try again,” I said, fighting back tears. “What the hell was all that supposed to mean, about how convenient it was I needed a superhuman favor? What are you not telling me?”
Jordan tried to reach for my hand and I jerked away from him.
He sighed and folded his arms over his chest. “I—I took advantage of the situation, to get closer to you.” He hung his head. “It was wrong, I should have just helped you.”
“You could have just brought Lincoln home?” I asked
“I could have,” he said guiltily.
“Why didn’t you?”
“I didn’t know what you would think—after. How you would feel. Of course I knew you would be happy to have your brother safe, but what would you think of me?”
My anger surged again. “So you knew where he was? For how long? How long before you had me agree to all this?” I asked, pacing back from him.
“I contacted you as soon as I realized it was him,” he promised. “He was safe, every moment.”
I made a circle around the tiny kennel. “Why weren’t you just honest with me?”
“If I just gave him back—which I should have, I know that now—I wouldn’t have been able to meet you.” His dark eyes were downcast and his shoulders were slumped.
“You could have just introduced yourself; you could have told me you helped my brother. I would have been grateful,” I said uncertainly.
“You wouldn’t have believed me,” he argued quietly. “You wouldn’t have known I was real. Please believe me, I would have never let any harm come to your brother. I just wanted you to know I was real and that I cared about you.” He finally looked up, his eyes shining. “I’m sorry.”
I nodded slowly but put my hand up when he stepped closer to me.
“And the other girl?” The question was out of my mouth before I could think and the embarrassment was immediate.
Jordan gave me a hopeful smile. “I don’t know, I swear. I’m not interested in anyone else; I haven’t been for a very long time. You believe that, don’t you?”
I nodded again, not sure of what to say to that. My mind didn’t want to believe what my ears were hearing.
He frowned unhappily. “My cousin has humans. I’m sure she must have been his, I’ll have to ask my uncle when he’s in a better mood.”
A whimper from the dog drew both of our attention. He knelt back down in the straw to soothe her and I slid down against the wall where I stood.
“Your uncle really is a jerk,” I said after a while.
Jordan sighed. “He’s not. You’re right, he doesn’t like humans, human women in particular, but I think he’s more sad about something than angry.”
“He seemed pretty angry to me,” I muttered.
“I don’t know the whole story,” he continued, as if he hadn’t heard me. “And I know he wouldn’t like it if I asked.”
“So because he’s so sad about something that happened to him and his girlfriend he’s trying to break us up? Mature. And how old is he, a few thousand years?”
Jordan grinned. “Are you my ‘girlfriend’?” he asked.
I blushed. “I didn’t mean it like that that, although it does sound better than math tutor. Or slave.”
“Never that,” Jordan said. “Or a tutor. No offense, but you’ve been a terrible tutor.”
“Hey,” I laughed, “you try explaining combustion engines!”
“I can’t, that’s why I asked you.”
He smiled at me and I couldn’t help but smile back. “Are we okay?” he asked.
I nodded. I wanted everything to be okay, almost needed it to be. Questions still wormed around in the back of my head, but when hadn’t they in the time I had known him?
Suddenly he lunged forward and wrapped his hands in my hair, pulling me in for another kiss. It was sweet and warm and I awkwardly tried to put my feelings into it. I could feel his lips curve up into a smile. “Yesterday really was your first kiss?” he asked, his lips still pressed against mine.
I shoved my hands up between our faces, covering mine. “You can tell that?”
He laughed, pulling my hands down. “Don’t be embarrassed. I’m sorry; I shouldn’t have been so forward.”
I couldn’t look at him, just nodded. The dog whimpered again and I almost thanked her out loud for the distraction.
My cheeks were red and I couldn’t hide my tiny smile. I fidgeted with my
hair to try to cover it but I could tell from Jordan’s grin I wasn’t doing a very good job, but he kindly paid all of his attention to the dog, giving me a moment to myself. The fire in my cheeks finally burned itself out.
“Better?” he asked.
I nodded sheepishly, looking at the floor.
“And we’re okay?”
“Yeah,” I said, a little sad again.”I have to be okay with someone.”
Jordan looked up from scratching behind the dogs ears. “What do you mean?”
I folded my legs under me and leaned back against the wall. “Lincoln and I got in a huge fight. And we never fight. About anything.”
“What happened?” Jordan asked.
I groaned and rubbed my hands over my face. “Nothing horrible, really. I mean, it wasn’t supposed to be, he was trying to be nice.”
“Okay,” Jordan said slowly.
Suddenly I didn’t want to explain the situation, realizing how hypocritical I was going to sound. I was mad I thought he had another girlfriend when I went on an actual date with another guy?
“It’s not a big deal,” I prefaced.
He cocked his head to the side but didn’t say anything.
I sighed and then started. “The last couple weeks have been pretty rough and Grandma hasn’t been feeling well and Linc has been so ... needy, I guess—which I don’t mind! Anyway, I lost my temper at school and got in trouble and so then of course I got in trouble with my dad. And honestly, a lot of it has been Linc’s crappy friends. Anyway, so ironically, to be nice, he decided to include me in all their big plans for a dance at our school and it was pretty much a disaster.”
Jordan’s eyebrows drew down together. He was not dissuaded with my rambling explanation. “How so?”
I tried to still my fidgeting hands. “Well, he set me up with a date who was a total asshole, made me spend most of the evening with him and his date, who everyday goes out of her way to let me know how much she doesn’t like me and then proceeded to tell me the reason his friends don’t like me is because I’m a stuck-up bitch. When this whole time, literally the last four years, I’ve just been trying to fill my mom’s shoes and take care of everyone and so didn’t have time to work on being one of the popular kids. It ended with me running away in tears, which I’m sure all of his jerk friends are laughing about right now.”