Jack?
A good working hypothesis until proven otherwise. Still, as Judge Diana would tell you, “We have insufficient information to form an opinion.”
And yes, Jack, I’m glad we don’t have them along this trip. I do love jumping to conclusions.
Yes, Kris, but remember, sometimes a snake is just a snake and an axe is just an axe.
Thank you, Nelly.
The cymbals crashed, the horns began to blow and the drums went deadly quiet. Kris’s attention returned front and center.
There, two dozen Iteeche stepped forth, a palanquin born high above their shoulders by three poles. Again, the Iteeche bearers wore nothing; the alabaster skin over their bulging muscles was highlighted by tattoos of aquamarine and magenta, amber and turquoise . . . shot through with bold slashes of red and black.
Racing stripes, anyone? Nelly put in.
The enclosure they bore was a work of art in wood and wicker, lacquer and cloth. Portions were dominated by finely worked gold filigree, other sections were covered with delicate pictures of what Kris took for sea scenes or Iteeche bowing to chairs like this one.
Which is exactly what happed as the palanquin carriers stepped onto the pier. The less dressed and naked fell to their hands and knees and bowed their heads to the ground. Those with braziers of incense set them before them as did those with the water fountains. Apparently, all that noise making had put them on warning because the entire exercise was carried out with the fluid grace of a wave washing toward the shore. Those with the fans went down as well, but kept the fans moving with the right or left pair of their arms.
Following behind the palanquin were four Iteeche, apparently from the same rental agency based on their tattoo jobs. They supported an ornate sedan chair between them. A curtain shielded its occupant from the attention of those around him. On an order from within, the attendants carefully lowered the sedan chair and while three went to the full head, hands and knees drill, the fourth obsequiously pulled the curtain aside.
Ron stepped out in full regal raiment. As Kris had seen him when first they met, his clothing shone in the light and turned every shade under the rainbow as he stood.
You have got to get yourself a dress made out of that stuff, Jack put in.
Nelly, make a note. In my vast spare time, I’m to figure out the ins and outs of Iteeche commerce, dress making and whatever, and get me a dress made of that stuff.
You don’t have to be mean to Jack. I think you’d look great in such a dress. Unless you want me to make you up some temporary tattoos so you can dance up the moon for the Imperial court.
I was a lot younger then, Kris growled.
But just as lovely, Jack added quickly.
Enough. Back to business.
And business was finally developing. Ron, or more correctly at the moment, Ron’sum’Pin’sum’We qu Cap’sum’We barked an order and those carrying the palanquin carefully lowered it to the deck, then assumed the head down bow, though they pulled their legs up under themselves to take up less room. Ron stepped through them to climb a set of stairs to the ornate gazebo they carried. He unlatched the door and offered a hand inside to help its occupant out.
And the big Kahuna himself stepped forth.
He was shorter than Ron, possible the result of a gentle stoop to his shoulders, but it was hard to tell. He wore an elaborate headdress of gold, silver and jewels. He appeared paler than any Iteeche there, but unlike the others, there were wrinkles around his eyes and beak.
Like Ron, his clothing was made of the cloth that shimmered and changed color, either in the light or as he moved. Each of his four legs was draped in loose fitting folds that might be trousers or maybe a single skirt. The cloth of his sleeves swept all the way to the ground. Gold filigree at the wrists encouraged them to drag the floor as he walked.
As Ron’s chooser shook out his garments, Kris realized she had a small diplomatic crisis on her hands. So far, everyone had come to her. Of course, they were all ambassadorial in rank and she was the full emissary for King Ray.
Also, she had the free booze.
But what about this? Should she wait for the Imperial advisor to come to her or had she better take the extra step? Out there, his guards surrounded him. Should she really expect that he had brought all this artillery to her door step to then leave them behind and cross her brow on his own?
The longer Ron and his chooser took their own sweet time to shake out his robes, the bigger the question of what happens next grew.
Nelly, get me Ron on net.
Kris, he is off net.
Off net!
Node not active.
You son of a squid, Kris thought and did her best to suppress a scowl. Neat way to avoid negotiations, don’t mention it ahead of time and be unavailable when the fat hits the fire.
Jack, with me.
With Jack at her elbow she slow marched down the ornate brow, through the axe men and snake tenders, and by the armed honor guard and hangers on. With Jack threading his way one row over from her, she walked down a row of kowtowing palanquin carriers to stand behind Ron’s chooser.
Only when she was there did Ron make to clear his throat, and lift a hand to point to where Kris waited.
The old Iteeche turned and Kris looked into eyes that had grown old but were still alert, if weary. For a moment, Kris wondered what he’d been like when he and her much younger great-grandfather had met to seek an end to the endless bloodshed and destruction of the Iteeche War. Human War to those Iteeche Kris now stood among.
Ron began to speak, and Kris paid close attention to the translation.
“My celebrated chooser, it is my joyful responsibility to introduce to you Grand Admiral, Her Royal Highness, Kristine Longknife of the United Society, Chosen Royal Battle Fleet Commander of the mighty war clan Longknife, Hammerer of barbarians from without the Empire and Emissary and Speaker for Humanity to our Worshipful Emperor.”
Kris saluted. She’d made up her mind that her king would bow to no one. She was King Ray in the flesh. She did not bow.
The old Iteeche showed no reaction.
Ron went on. “Know you, Grand Admiral and Princess Kristine, you stand in the glorious presence and I have the great honor of presenting you to Roth’sum’We’sum’Quin Chap’sum’We, First Chooser of that sib who stands as Second Advisor to His Worshipfulness in All Things Wise and Desirable and stands as First Advisor to His Worshipfulness in affairs concerning the dark matters taking place outside the Realm of Light that our Worshipful Emperor smiles upon. He is rightly charged with Defense of the Realm and possesses the worshipful Emperor’s full power to mete out High Justice. The Worshipful One bids all to stand in awe of him as they would of Himself.”
Ron’s back on net and he tells me Roth has agreed to cut it short or we’d be here all night.
Tell Ron I’m glad he’s back on net.
I didn’t.
Very diplomatic call.
Kris lowered her salute and cautiously offered her hand. When the Iteeche grand honcho failed to reach for it, she dropped the effort.
“May I welcome you to my simple command ship. Since it was built to hammer those that lurk beyond the Realm of Light, it is but a simple warship,” Kris said, hoping a little humility wouldn’t be mistaken for weakness. Not when she tossed “hammer” in there right away.
The old Iteeche began to walk toward the gangplank, with Kris on his left hand, Ron on his right. He did not even spare a glance at the circus that knelt silently around him.
Instead, he spoke to Kris. “My worthy chosen one has told me how you met resistance during your placid voyage to the Worshipful One’s Radiant Presence.”
“Yes, we did run into ships that did not seem to sail the way some would wish,” Kris said, showing she could be just as evasive as the best diplomat.
“I am told that you evaded the problem without harm to any of your ships.”
“Yes,” Kris agreed. “My brief had not extended to such matte
rs within the peace of an Empire of Harmony. I chose not to chastise them, but sent them on their way unenlightened.”
“Hopefully, you will not always be so gentle with those who have left the path of the righteous.”
“Hopefully, in the future, I will know more about what I am sailing into and what is expected of me when I get there.”
Roth took two more steps toward the Princess Royal, then paused to turn to Kris. Behind him, she could see one axe man and one of the snake carriers march toward her.
Then he hacked out a noise that brought a That’s a laugh from Nelly. He clapped her on the shoulder. “You are so much like your twice removed chooser. His sperm runs strong along your backbone. My chosen warned me that I might face as much roiled water as I had in my youth. It will be good to swim among those likes again. Come, show me what you have prepared for me.”
Chapter 34
Kris had a general concept of how the evening was supposed to go. First, she’d introduce Roth to the ambassadors, then she’d take him and the rest into the much modified Forward Lounge and tell all the humans just how the cow was going to eat the cabbage if said cow didn’t want to end up hamburger.
Having a concept of a plan was one thing. Executing that plan was something else entirely. Especially when the centerpiece of the plan had arrived with axes and snakes.
While Kris pondered her problem, Roth solved it for her.
One of the snake charmers and two of the axe men stepped out of place and took station ahead of them. Eight Marines behind them stepped out of ranks and marched to cover their rear. Without a signal from anyone, this little parade proceeded up the gangway and onto the quarterdeck.
Captain Klum saluted. The band blared out ruffles and flourishes four times and then wisely fell silent, no one having provided them any music that his Worshipful’s court claimed for an anthem.
As the snake bearer reached the forest of banners, they parted before him, opening like some ancient sea tale.
Quite spectacular, Nelly.
It just seemed like the right thing, Kris.
Is someone getting spontaneous?
I’ve told enough bad jokes to have earned some spontaneity. Also, Lieutenant Longknife has advised the ambassadors that our guest of honor is coming. They are forming a receiving line to meet him.
Have her advise them that a bow will go over much better than a offered handshake. Those in a uniform, diplomatic or military, might want to salute.
Done Kris.
Ahead of Kris, two Marines held open wide the doors from the quarterdeck to the reception and the Iteeche procession passed into the lower deck of the Forward Lounge. In the reverse of the usual practice, the human ambassadors had formed a loose line leaving plenty of room for the Iteeches with their snakes and axes.
Ron guided his chooser to meet Ambassador leJuinne of Earth. Once again, Ron went through the long process of introducing him. Fortunately, the Earth diplomat introduced himself by name and who he represented but not much else. It was the same with Kawaguchi-san, except he added several of the larger planets he represented. As they went down the other ten, nothing changed. Ron said a mouthful and the humans answered with their names and the association or planets they represented.
Kris, the crowd in the Forward Lounge was getting antsy, so I put this on several screens. Most are ignoring them, but it’s quieted things down a bit.
Thanks, Nelly.
At the end of the line, Lieutenant Longknife awaited them, with a sweep of an arm, and not even a glance at the snake, she ushered them out of the reception and into a short corridor that led to the lowest precincts of the Forward Lounge. The bottom section had been arranged to give Kris a podium and a table from which her main support staff could back her up. Abby was already there, along with Jacques and Amanda. Off to the right of the podium were two elaborate gold and bejeweled seats specially designed to be comfortable for Iteeche.
How Ron would array the accompanying guards was quickly handled. While Ron helped Roth seat himself and adjust the throne, Smart MetalTM being good for that, the guy with the snake came to stand between them, and a step back. The two dudes with the honking big axes were also a step back but to the left and right of the thrones. The eight Marines in bright red uniforms backed them all up, bringing their weapons to order arms with a crash.
Kris stood close at hand, in case she needed to squash any untold developments while the diplomats followed them in and found their seats. Marine waiters circulated among them, taking orders. Nelly was her magnificent self. Only a few moments after the drink order had been spoken, a glass with the appropriate beverage rose from the table.
Roth spotted one of them and raised wide his two left eyes at Kris. “Are you now making food out of that Smart Metal of yours?”
“I assure you, Your Most Eminent Advisor,” the short title Ron had suggested, “the spirts are quite natural and you can see the bartenders over there mixing the drinks. It’s just the delivery system that Nelly has upgraded.”
“We have heard much of your Magnificent Nelly,” Ron’s chooser said, “Someday you must let her show us all her tricks.”
“I would be most grateful for the opportunity,” Nelly answered from Kris’s collar bone.
All preparation done, Kris dismissed herself with the same nod of the head she would have allowed Grand Duchess Vicky Peterwald, and stepped off the paces to her rostrum. There she stared at her notes for a moment, cleared her throat, and looked up.
Never had Kris addressed a full amphitheater. Raising row upon row, at three different levels, stretched out tables and chairs with thousands of people drinking and sharing small talk.
Gradually, the silence from the well of the theater worked its way uphill as Kris picked out first one, then another clump of people and silenced them with an eye.
When the silence was totally complete, Kris began.
“Your Most Eminent Advisor of your Worshipful Emperor, Eminently Chosen One, Your Excellencies, Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for coming. I know it has been a long and eventful journey, both for you who traveled with me and those who waited for our arrival.”
Kris took a deep breath, “We set our feet today on a new and, no doubt, challenging path for both us and our two peoples. The extent to which we succeed or fail will have a great impact on both ourselves and the next generations of our peoples.”
Kris paused and let her eyes rove around the room, picking up important cliques among the merchant princes.
“We will not fail.”
She had the full attention of the business men and women.
“While we were gathering here, a Navy longboat intercepted a small boat. My Marines have had a quiet chat with those aboard the yawl. Somehow they had managed to establish contacts on the ground and they were on their way to make their fortune before the rest of you.”
A low growl swept the upper seats.
“I hope those schemers have others who will look after their interests, because they will be spending the next six months in my flagship’s brig.”
The growl from the merchants was different this time. They might not like anyone trying to rush the market, but they liked Kris locking any of them up even less.
“Now I know that many of you merchants have come here to make your fortune. I know that you see the Iteeche Empire as a wide-open market that you can leave your mark on and grow wealthy.”
Kris paused just long enough for some to lean forward in their seats before she went on.
“Unfortunately, I have some sad news for you. The Iteeche are an ancient people and their Empire predates we humans learning to build ships, much less space ships. They have been trading among themselves since before we started trading sharp rocks for pretty colored rocks. They’ve got ways of doing business. You cross one of their advisors who rates an axe man or worse, a poisonous snake in a crystal bowl, and it won’t be a few months in my brig that will be slowing you down.”
“Now, I’ve fought some m
ighty mean critters. I’ve left a lot of them dead behind me. Of my own people, my first preference is to bring them home. The more the better. You, I’d like to send you home with wild tales to tell anyone who’ll listen about how strange things are in the mighty Iteeche Empire. I’d rather not be returning your frozen cadaver like a block of ice stowed in the back of the freezer. So, let me tell you how things are going to come down.”
Kris swept the room with a hard look.
“Tomorrow, I am invited to present my credentials to His Worshipfulness, the Emperor of the Iteeche Empire. Once we break the seal on my instructions from King Raymond, and we have reached some meetings of our mind, I am told I will be taken to my new palace. It’s not really mine, it’s more like yours. That is where you will stay on planet. That is where the Iteeche lords will allow businessmen to come to meet with you and enter into agreements that will be fully documented and certified by those same lords.”
A lot of mouths were hanging open among the merchant princes.
“Yes, the Iteeche are making the rules and, if you want to keep your head on your shoulders or avoid yielding your neck for a snake bite, you are advised to follow those instructions. Yes, I know how things are back home. But you’ve left the safety of home. Here you are under the Iteeche’s rules.”
“Are you going to let them run us around like we have a gold ring in our nose? You Longknifes,” came from somewhere up in the cheap seats.
Roth’s four eyes narrowed, there was an instinctive flick of his wrist.
Instantly the two guys with pole axes took two steps forward and brought them down to the ready, points aimed at the upper rows. The crimson-hooded man with the snake orb jiggled the lid just enough to send creepy noises forth.
The acoustics in this place are fantastic, Nelly.
Maybe too good. They can hear every word you say, but you get guys like that one shooting his mouth off.
Yeah.
“A word of warning to those who came here seeking to make a fortune,” Kris said, continuing her lecture on the rules as they would apply to her merchant princes. “Merchants are not held in very high regards among the Iteeche. The pecking order is lords, priests, warriors, craftsmen, farmers and lastly merchants. Feel free to debate the costs and benefits of such an arrangement with my advisors, but I wouldn’t recommend raising that question with someone dirtside with headsman and snake wranglers at their elbow. You saw how His Eminent Advisor reacted, how fast these fellows with death at their fingertips moved to reward disrespect in their presence. You can thank your lucky stars that you are aboard a Royal battlecruiser and not ashore. Personally, I doubt that the kilometer between here and there would have saved you if you were on the planet below. My great-grandfather, your King, has told me stories of just how far and accurate an Iteeche warrior could throw one of those things.”
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