by Eric Vall
We sat in relative silence as the rest of the team and I cleaned off our Darkfisk and then placed all of the remains onto a single platter. We were going to carry it back to the Shining Alliance headquarters, where we would siphon out the toxins and then use it to create a deadly weapon.
The weapon that would bring an end to Tenebris.
Once the last succubus had finished her meal, we stood up to leave. However, Blagdan quickly held up his hand with a warning.
“Guards,” he hissed. “Tenebris’ guards are doing a patrol.”
We looked up the road and saw the Caliginis was right. There were two shadowy figures stomping down the wooden planks of the road, and both of them were much bulkier than the Shadow People I’d seen so far, with jagged edges on their shoulders and a pointed head that suggested they were wearing a helmet. They still had the same glowing red eyes and nebulous bodies, but they also appeared to be holding shadow-flamed spears.
“I thought you said they weren’t around at this time of day?” I shot back as I placed my hand on the hilt of my sword.
“They’re not supposed to be!” the Shadow Man retorted. “They must have decided to come out early, or maybe--”
“You there!” one of the guards shouted once they got closer. “Don’t move!”
“Aw, fuck,” I whispered.
It was only two guards. Surely, we could kill them and get away without much effort. Then again, Zilla and Blagdan had both warned us about these guys. If they were as good at hand-to-hand combat as I’d been told, this was gonna be anything but easy.
“Why are there humans in our realm?” the first guard growled as he held up his spear at Blagdan. “Are you with the Alliance?”
“Me? An alliance member?” Blagdan played it cool. “These are just some demons who accidentally ended up here when they were dicking around with black Hellfire. I was just being a gracious host and showing them around the city.”
“Likely story,” the second guard growled. “We’ll let Tenebris decide if it’s good enough or not.”
I looked over at Invidia, who was still holding onto the plate of Darkfisk remains, and nodded toward the platter. She must have understood what I was going for, because she slowly reached down and picked up one of the fish by its floppy spine.
“Gentlemen, that won’t be necessary,” Blagdan mused as he tried to smooth-talk his way out of this. “Tenebris surely doesn’t need to be bothered with--”
“Shut up!” the first guard sneered. “Come with us, or we’ll kill you all on the spot.”
“Not a fucking chance,” Inpulsa warned as yellow sparks flickered to her hands.
“Ma’am, put out that magic,” the second guard warned. “Put it out right now, or we’ll have to--”
I let out a whistle, and Invidia and I jumped into action.
The Sister of Envy took the tail of the Darkfisk, whipped it back, and stabbed it right into the spot where the guard’s jugular would be.
He let out a yelp of agony as he fumbled for the spines in his neck, but it was far too late. He began to gag as he crumpled to the ground.
At the same time, I spun around, drew my goat-headed dagger from its sheath, and stabbed it through the back of the first guard’s neck.
He tried to call out for help, but all that came out was a gurgly mess as his thick black blood oozed down his torso and onto the ground. The guard stumbled forward and tried to lash out at Blagdan with his spear, but the Caliginis Resistance Fighter was ready.
Blagdan grabbed the spear by its hilt, lunged forward, and stabbed his clawed hand directly into the guard’s throat. There was a spray of black liquid as the guard’s throat was ripped open, and then he collapsed to the ground, lifeless.
Meanwhile, the other guard was still alive, but he was convulsing in agony while bile-green foam spilled from his mouth.
“Let’s get the fuck out of here,” I demanded.
“Ya don’t gotta tell me twice,” Todd whistled, “what a way to go.”
“Awww, man,” Tris sighed, “I didn’t think I was gonna have to run today.”
“Exactly,” Blagdan warned as he began to float back toward the base, “we just violently killed two of Tenebris’ guards in a public setting. The whole town’s going to be calling for our heads.”
“I thought they hated Tenebris?” Deja inquired.
“They do,” the Shadow Man shot back, “but you know what’s more powerful than hate? Fear. And unfortunately, they fear our king much more than they hate him. Any one of these people would sell us out if it meant saving their own skins.”
We followed Blagdan down the streets of Umbra as quickly as we could as we tried to be as discreet as possible.
The entire city was now on high alert, and we were prime target number one.
Chapter 9
“Quickly, now!” Blagdan hissed as we snuck through the back alleys of Umbra. “We can’t let them--Halt!”
The Shadow Man held up his hand, and the rest of us stopped in our tracks and pressed ourselves up against the wall.
Three more guards marched by, but they didn’t seem to notice us. As soon as they were out of earshot, I pulled myself forward and walked up to Blagdan.
“How many of them are there?” I asked. “Seven?”
“I’m afraid not,” the Shadow Man explained. “There are seven guards who always escort Tenebris to the Playhouse, but there are many more who follow him, including some of our former brethren.”
“Fuck,” I sighed. “Does that mean we’re going to have to kill all of them, too?”
“Hardy,” Blagdan scoffed, “the guards only follow those who they see as the most powerful. If Tenebris were to fall, they would simply switch allegiances to whoever killed him. Let me go first … I look the most inconspicuous of us all, even if they may recognize me.”
“How are they gonna recognize you?” Todd giggled. “Aside from those guards, you all literally look the same.”
“Not cool, bro,” I hissed at the imp, “totally not cool.”
Todd’s eyes widened when he realized his gaffe, and he began to shake his head vigorously.
“I totally didn’t mean it like that,” he apologized. “You gotta understand, some of my best friends are Shadow People. I mean, Caliginis! Fuck.”
The imp hung his head with shame, but Blagdan was already on his way out and onto the street. He looked around cautiously before he gave the “all okay” signal.
We followed the Shadow Person for a few miles more, until we finally came to the alley that housed the entrance to the Shining Alliance’s headquarters. However, my heart fell into my stomach as we turned the corner.
There, inspecting the wall opposite of where the hidden entrance was located, were three more guards.
“We’re wasting our time,” one of them sighed, “there’s nothing here.”
“Says you,” the other one snorted. “You heard the reports, same as I. Several members of the Alliance were seen headed down this alleyway, and then they didn’t pop out the other side. And with the shit that just went down in the town square? I’m sure those humans, demons, and their little escort will be back here at any moment.”
“Fuck,” Blagdan grumbled. “No way to sneak past them.”
“Well, we can’t stay out here, either,” Inpulsa warned, “by this point we’re probably on every wanted poster in the city.”
“Kinkos doesn’t even print posters that fast, Pikachu,” Todd whispered, “there’s no way these dark Vikings rejects got ‘em out that quickly.”
“It’s an expression.” The yellow-haired succubus rolled her eyes and summoned yellow Hellfire into her hands. “Now, do you want me to light these fuckers up, or not?”
“Not yet,” I said as I placed my hand on the succubus’s arm and lowered it, “we need to be stealthy with this one, and I don’t really know how much ‘stealth’ you can get out of a giant bolt of lightning.”
“Oh, you want stealth?” Inpulsa smiled as she cracked her
hands together. “I’ll show you stealth. Watch this.”
Without another word, the yellow-haired succubus strutted into the alleyway and down toward the guards. As she did so, all three of the bastards turned and drew their short swords toward her.
“Halt!” one of them growled, but Inpulsa just ignored them.
“Now, boys … ” she cooed as she strutted up to the first guard, “I’m just a little lost puppy, trying to find her way through this big, scary place. Could any of you help me?”
“Ohhhh, the ‘ol ‘sexy and helpless’ technique,” Todd snickered. “Many a woman has used that on me, bro. Too bad it only works on the weak-minded.”
“Didn’t Sandra Wilson get you to lend her your car?” I reminded the imp. “The brand new Mustang you had before Lola?”
“Yeahhhhh, and she’s totally gonna bring it back,” the imp whispered, “she’s just not done with it yet.”
“Bro, that was in college.”
“Maybe she needed it for a long errand, okay?” Todd sighed. “I’m tryin’ to watch the fireworks show here!”
“Ma’am,” the guard warned and held up his sword, “you need to step back right now.”
Inpulsa continued walking until she was standing at the tip of the guard’s weapon. Then she reached up, took his blade in her hand seductively, and blew the three guards a kiss.
The next thing we knew, she called forth yellow Hellfire into her hands.
The spell traveled down the sword at the speed of light, lit up the first guard like a Christmas tree, and then spread out onto the bodies of the other two. They all jolted and convulsed as they were fried from the inside, and then their red eyes went dark, replaced by smoke billowing out from inside their fried corpses.
Inpulsa turned her head back over her shoulder, held up her smoking hand, and blew away the smoke sassily.
“Alright,” I conceded, “that was fucking awesome.”
“Quickly!” Blagdan commanded. “We need to get inside and dispose of those bodies before more guards show up.”
The seven of us ran over to Inpulsa’s position. Then Eclipse, Ira, and I all picked up one of the fried bodies as Blagdan closed his eyes and began to speak the incantation.
Slowly but surely, the wall he was standing before turned from a solid into a gas, and then the eight of us slipped through.
Once we were inside the Shining Alliance headquarters, there were gasps throughout.
“Tenebris’ guards?” a disembodied voice gasped.
“What did you do?” demanded another.
“Do they know we’re here?” one of the Shadow People growled.
“Silence!” Zilla’s voice boomed through the building as she floated toward us cautiously. “What happened out there?”
Tris instantly stepped back, threw up her arms in surrender, and shook her head.
“Don’t ask me,” she mused, “I’m just a lowly spectator, out for a leisurely stroll.”
Blagdan explained everything. He told his queen about the new plan, about how we intended to split up Tenebris from his other guards and then take him out using Deja’s powers.
Unfortunately, that’s where we lost the Shadow Queen.
“You intend for this entire mission to ride on a power that this one can not yet fully control?” Zilla questioned and pointed to Deja. “That seems … foolish.”
“No offense, Zilla,” I shot back, “but I don’t think you’re really in the position to be judging people’s plans. How many ‘saviors’ have come through here and died because of their faulty battle strategies?”
“Too many,” the Shadow Woman shrugged, “but that was their doing, not ours. I will let you proceed as you wish, but know I have strong reservations about this idea.”
“I would trust Deja with my life,” I explained, “she’s one of my Demon Lords, and her powers are some of the strongest I’ve ever seen.”
“Jacob, stopppp,” the tan succubus giggled, “you’re gonna make me blush.”
“It’s true,” I continued, “besides, even if Deja’s powers are coming in sporadically, all I need is one shot. Vidia?”
Invidia stepped forward, held out the plate of Darkfisk remains, and bowed.
“What is this?” Zilla pondered. “The remnants of your dinner?”
“Yes,” I grinned, “but it’s also the key to killing Tenebris.”
“What, are you going to have him choke on a bone?” the Shadow Queen mused.
“We’re going to stab him with one of these toxic spines,” I explained. “It only takes a few seconds for this shit to kill a person. That’s all I need. One shot of this, directly into that fucker’s body, and it’s lights out for Tenebris.”
“I saw it first hand, my Queen,” Blagdan reaffirmed, “twice, actually.”
“And I’ve experienced it!” Ira purred. “I nearly choked to death on my own vomit. It was lovely.”
“The plan is simple,” I continued, “Deja tells me where Tenebris is going to teleport, I stab him with my sword that’s covered with this toxic shit, and then boom! No more Tenebris.”
Zilla remained silent as she mulled over my plan. Finally, she raised her slender hand to her chin and rubbed it in thought.
“It just might work,” she agreed. “Then again, I thought so many of the other savior’s plans were going to work, too. The only way we will find out is by trying.”
“That’s the spirit!” I clapped my hands together in victory. “Now, do you have some sort of machine or something that can squeeze the venom out of these things?”
“I’ll get the blacksmiths working on it,” Zilla confirmed. “If you’ll hand over your sword, I shall have them begin.”
Hand over my sword? This was my most beloved weapon, the one that had saved my ass millions of times and slain countless demons. Still … I trusted Zilla. It was in both of our best interests to see Tenebris gone, so there was not a chance she was trying to fuck me over.
After a split-second of deliberation, I handed over the sword.
“And what do you want me to do in the meantime?” I questioned.
“You’ve had a long day,” the Shadow Queen nodded, “you all have. What would be best for you right now is to go off and rest. There are ten rooms upstairs, so that should be more than enough for each of you.”
“I thought you’d never ask!” Tris giggled, and then she darted toward the staircase so quickly she could have left a cloud of smoke behind.
“I call dibs on the one closest to the window!” Todd exclaimed as he raised his hand. “It’s always best to have a nice draft goin’ when you’re slappin’ the salami. ‘Cold Turkey,’ is what I call it. Wanna know why?”
“I have never wanted to know something less in my life,” Eclipse sighed.
“It’s because it looks like I’m slapping around a fucking turkey neck,” the imp giggled. “Gobbler and everything.”
“Just … go upstairs,” the tattooed succubus groaned as she facepalmed.
“Ya don’t gotta tell me twice!” The imp grinned, and then he ran across the headquarters toward the stairs.
“I’m going to retire, as well,” Blagdan announced, and then he floated in the same direction.
“If it’s all good with you guys,” Invidia spoke up, “I think I’m gonna hang out down here with the Caliginis. They’re actually kinda cool to be around.”
“And I’m going to stay down here to watch her,” Deja added as she narrowed her eyes, “that doesn’t sound like normal Vidia. Like, at all.”
“It doesn’t,” Eclipse chuckled, “but I’m staying down here, too. I want to see if any of the fighters can train me on how to use my newfound black magic powers. The stronger I get, the easier our final battle against Beelzebub will be.”
“I can toast to that,” I chuckled and raised a fake glass, “but I think I’m going to bed.”
“Me too,” Inpulsa sighed. “I feel so exhausted, and we’ve barely done anything today.”
“I’m goin
g that way too!” Ira purred as she grabbed one of the Darkfisks from Vidia’s plate. “Catch you all on the other siiiiiide!”
As we watched the Sister of Wrath dash off toward the stairs with glee, Inpulsa leaned into my ear.
“Let’s make sure we have a room far away from hers, okay?” she implored.
“‘We?’” I turned my head and grinned. “Are we planning to share?”
“Would you say ‘no’ if I wanted to?” Inpulsa purred.
“Is that even a question?” I shot back without missing a beat. “Let’s go rest up for a bit. They can have their fun down here, and we can have some fun upstairs.”
“Finally, something I can get behind.” The yellow-haired beauty smiled and wrapped her arm around my shoulder.
“Well, guys,” I joked to the remaining succubi and Shadow People, “it’s been fun, but I think we’re gonna go recharge our batteries for a little bit.”
“Pun intended?” Eclipse said with a wink.
“I don’t know,” Inpulsa said as she snapped, and sparks danced from her fingers, “but I fully intend to let our king fill my meter back to full power, if you get my drift.”
Without another word, Inpulsa turned us back toward the staircase, and we rushed toward the second floor in a hurry. The two of us charged up the stairs, and the sound of our footsteps thundered down the hallway as we went.
The second floor was just as plain as the first. There was a long hallway with at least a dozen numbered doors on each side. Barren walls stretched between them as far as the eye could see, and the floor was made of the same shadowy wood that so many other structures in Umbra were made of.
The planks creaked underneath our steps as we made our way to one of the rooms on the left side of the hallway and knocked.
No answer.
“I guess this is as good as any.” Inpulsa smiled and then opened the door slowly.
Inside the room was a ratty mattress with handfuls of hay jutting out of each end and a blanket haphazardly tossed over its top. That was it.
No pictures. No decor. Not even a window or a desk.
“I guess this room’s purpose is pretty straightforward,” I observed, “only one thing you can use it for.”