“They won’t be. I was embarrassed and I needed to hide out for a while.” I tried for a smile but it felt weird and strained even to me. “Anyway our arrangement is all done. We have the ceremony and then I’ll be out of your hair.” For good. This time my smile was a little brighter and his shoulders relaxed so I knew I’d said exactly what he wanted to hear.
“What will you do?”
“I’ll figure it out.”
“Jack will be staying here for a while, so you can too. If you want.”
If he wasn’t this man, this kind man who would brave eternal awkwardness just to let me be closer to my brother, I wouldn’t love him like I do. Though right now I hated him for being so nonchalant about it. For not hurting the way I did.
“Thank you Mason.”
“So you’ll stay?”
“No.” He looked confused and I only shrugged. “I need to get to work.”
He stared for a long time like he wanted to say more, but didn’t know where to begin. That was fine by me because the one thing I wanted from him, he couldn’t give me.
“Okay then, I’ll see you later.”
When Tammy invaded our girls’ night and insisted we go out to eat I felt pretty certain she had something else on her mind. But as our ribs, chicken, potato salad and biscuits were delivered I knew I was just acting paranoid because of the earlier weirdness between me and Mason.
“I’m glad you suggested this Tammy, I haven’t had Dolly’s barbecue in ages.” One of the downsides of going away for college was that I didn’t have access to Dolly’s famous barbecue.
“I don’t get out here nearly as much as I should, but now I’m back I plan to eat here at least once a week.” Tammy licked her fingers and plucked another biscuit from the center of the table. “You should too, fatten yourself up.”
“She don’t wanna get fat Gramma,” Lily insisted but she was hard to take serious with a ring of barbecue sauce around her mouth.
“Not fat little girl, but she’s too thin.”
I rolled my eyes because Tammy has been saying I needed to fatten up since I turned fifteen. “I’m not thin at all Tammy, but I’ll take the compliment.”
She smacked her lips together and shook her head, assessing me until I squirmed. “I’ll never get you young girls and your obsession with being skinny. A man needs something to grab on to.”
I choked on my soda. “Grab onto what?” Lily asked.
“Oh hush up child. Have some quarters and ride on that pony you’ve been eyeing.” Tammy dug about twelve quarters from her pocket and that’s when I knew that my initial assessment was correct. The old girl had something up her sleeve.
“Thanks Gramma, I’ll be over there,” she said and took off.
Tammy watched the little girl run off and when she was satisfied Lily was safe, she turned to me. “I hear you tried to get a bank loan.”
I nodded and explained what happened at the bank. “So I’ll just have to work for a few more years and try again.” Maybe the interest on my trust fund will have grown enough that I won’t need someone else to get a loan.
“Why don’t you just rent some of the unused M&M land? Lord knows we have plenty of it.”
I shrugged because I didn’t really want to get into it but I couldn’t lie to her. “I tried that first and Mason refused.” That still stung but I refused to show it. “Now though, I think he had the right idea. Don’t say anything about this Tammy, I’ll figure it out myself.”
She shook her head in disapproval, taking a long sip of tea before she spoke. “You young people and your damned independence. You think me and Mitch, rest his soul, turned our small spread into the magnificence it is today by ourselves? His daddy and granddaddy put everything they had into the M&M Ranch, making sure it was strong and viable for the future. They all had help. We had help too.” Her gaze took on a faraway look as she continued to speak. “The only thing I brought to the marriage was eight grand in prize money, a horse and a bunch of sparkly riding outfits. Our early years were lean, city girl lean Sage.”
I knew she was right about that, but my situation wasn’t the same. “I have what my parents could provide for my future and still it isn’t enough. But don’t worry Tammy, this isn’t the end of my dream. I’m just postponing it.” I hoped that was true.
“And what about my son?”
And here we go. “He has everything he needs.”
Tammy smacked the table. “Then you haven’t been paying attention girl. Mason is stubborn to a fault, and now he’s fighting his feelings so hard that he’s twisted up and running scared. One of you has to fight for this.”
She was right, of course except for the small matter of Mason not loving me. “There is nothing to fight for Tammy and I need to worry about my future.”
She gave me an odd look that might have been disappointment, but I couldn’t tell. “I don’t think you understand child. Tracy didn’t just die and leave him brokenhearted, she died while leaving him and Lily. She’d told him hours before her death that she fell in love with some carpet manufacturer and they were moving to Maine to start over. She was on her way to meet up with him when the truck hit her head on.”
I hadn’t known any of that, only that she died in a horrific car accident. Still it didn’t change anything. “Tammy listen to me, Mason doesn’t love me. This isn’t about the fact that he won’t commit, he doesn’t want to commit to me, okay? So no matter what his issues are, that’s that.”
She was silent for a long time after that and I felt bad about my harsh tone. She didn’t deserve it but I meant what I said.
“If you’re sure.”
“I am.” At least I would be.
Eventually.
Mason
Damn these days felt like they were getting longer and hotter. Not as long as the nights without Sage in my bed with me. Under me. On top of me. Moaning my name. But that wouldn’t be happening anytime soon because Sage was still not talking to me. No it was worse, she’s been avoiding me for days. Well no more of this shit. Tonight, she would listen even if I have to tie her up to make it happen.
I made my way towards the main house with a plan forming that included me and Sage and a romantic dinner. I sat in the mudroom and pulled off my boots before stomping inside the kitchen.
“Hey Ma. What smells so good?”
“I’m making my beef and pork lasagna so I hope you’re hungry.”
“I am but I was hoping to take Sage out to dinner tonight. Have you seen her?”
“Kind of last minute for a date, isn’t it?”
I sighed. “Maybe if she wasn’t avoiding me I could have asked her sooner.”
“Or maybe,” she said as she ladled the meat sauce over the noodles, ricotta and vegetables, “she’s giving you exactly what you want.”
That was ominous. “What the hell is that supposed to mean Ma?”
She shrugged. “It means you’re going through a lot of trouble for a woman you claim you don’t love.”
“I don’t!”
She tried to hide a devious little smirk but I saw it, dammit. “Then why do you need to take her out to dinner when I have a perfectly good lasagna about to go in the oven?”
I groaned and looked up at the ceiling, in search of some miracle that would help me not lose my temper with my own mama. “Because we need to talk Ma.”
“There’s plenty of time before dinner, why don’t you go on up and talk to her now. But,” she aimed the sauce covered spatula in my direction with a fierce expression on her face, “maybe actually talk first. Make up sex later.”
“God, Ma! Eww, I don’t need to hear that from you.”
A loud laugh erupted from her, turning into a high-pitched cackle of amusement. “You think I only had sex twice in my life huh, one for you and one for Tanner?”
“Hell yes that’s what I think and I’ll continue thinking if you don’t mind!” Making a firm exit was hard as hell in nothing but socks on hard wood floors, but I made a quick getaway while Ma’s
laughter followed me up the stairs. I went straight to my room and grabbed a quick shower. If there was a chance Sage would go out with me tonight I didn’t want to give her time to change her mind. But when stopped at her door it was open and the shower was going. So I went in and sat.
Her laptop was open on the dresser and two worn suitcases stood beside them. Curious I leaned and picked one up, finding it heavier than an empty suitcase ought to be. With a frown, I tried the other. It wasn’t quite as heavy but it wasn’t empty either. What the hell? I was half tempted to walk around the bed to the closet and see if my suspicions were confirmed but I decided to wait, let Sage tell me herself.
“What are you doing in my room?”
I spun at her voice and was struck silent at the sight of Sage in nothing but a towel. Thick hair wet and sticking her to her neck, shoulders and chest. Her long legs were on display and I couldn’t take my eyes off her.
“I missed you.” Not what I intended to say but true anyhow.
Arms crossed and pushing her perky breasts up to form impressive cleavage, she glared at me. “What are you doing in here?”
“I came to see if we could talk.”
“And you needed to pick up my suitcase to do that?”
“Are you going somewhere,” I asked instead.
She growled and stepped further in the room, slamming the door behind her. “I’m not doing this with you Mason.” She let the towel drop and I tried like hell to keep my focus on her face instead of those beautiful breasts, flat stomach and feminine hips that begged for my touch. “You don’t get to barge in here and pretend like you give a damn all of a sudden.”
That pulled me up short. “All of a sudden? Because I didn’t say the words you wanted to hear, all of a sudden I don’t give a damn?”
“Oh please, spare me. You don’t give a damn. You’re secretly happy that I’m leaving but you think it makes you a jerk to admit it.” She picked up pink lace panties and turned her back to me while she slid them on, giving me a perfect shot of her shapely ass. “It’s fine Mason. I really thought I could handle sleeping with you without my feelings getting in the way but I couldn’t. That’s on me so don’t beat yourself up about it.”
I sighed and dropped to the bed. “Are things going to be like this between us forever? I hate that it’s so awkward now. You won’t even look at me.”
She froze for a brief moment, and went to the dresser to pick out a pair of socks, nearly knocking her laptop over in the process. “Why are you making a big deal out of this Mase?”
I heard her question but my mind was too focused on the words flashing at me from her laptop. “You’re taking a job in Austin?”
She snatched the laptop from me and slammed it shut. “None of your business!”
“It damn well is my business when you’re here working for me. When were you planning on telling me?”
She sucked in a long breath, letting it out slowly with her eyes close as though she were searching for patience. “If the interviews go well, I will give you the appropriate notice. You should be happy about this Mason, your life will go back to how it was before my brother guilted you into helping me out.”
“And what about your business Sage? Was that a lie, or is that all over now that you’re not getting what you want?”
“What I want?” Her voice was shrill as she slammed her feet into brown and turquoise boots, big blue eyes blazed fire in my direction. “You have no idea what I want and none of it matters anyway. I need a job, a real job and I’m going to find one.”
“All the way in Austin? Your brother just got back, or doesn’t that mean anything to you?”
She reared back as though I slapped her, blue eyes looking shocked. Hurt. Then I saw them, tears welling up in her eyes but her clenched jaw and flared nostrils told me how hard she fought to control them.
“Get out.”
“Sage, come on.”
“Get. Out.” For emphasis, she pointed to the door with an icy look on her face.
“This is my house Sage.” If this was how she wanted to do this, I was ready.
“Fine. I’ll leave then.” She grabbed her laptop and shoved it into a bag before hoisting it on her shoulder and reaching for the heavier suitcase. Without another word, she yanked the door open and I heard the thump, thump of the wheels descending the steps.
“Don’t walk away from me, Sage.” My voice couldn’t sound more menacing if I tried. That tone had most of my ranch hands shaking in their damn boots, but this one little scrap of a woman hadn’t even halted her steps. “Sage!” I thundered down the stairs after her and caught up with her at her car. “Dammit, Sage wait.”
She pulled out of my grasp and took a step back. “What? Have a few more insults to hurl at me? Let’s hear them, then.” She gave me a come on motion that infuriated me. “All out? Good. I’ll see you around Mason.”
“Sage I’m sorry.” My voice held a note of pleading that surprised me, but didn’t seem to move her.
“Don’t be,” she said as all the anger drained out of her, replaced with sadness. “I always knew you didn’t love me. Wouldn’t ever love me back. I just didn’t think it would hurt so bad.”
I stood there and watched as she got into the car and started the engine, pausing every few seconds to swipe at the tears she now couldn’t control. The engine turned over and she disappeared down the long driveway.
“Dammit!” I kicked at the dirt, wondering when everything went all to hell.
“Hoo boy, you couldn’t have messed that up more if you tried.”
I turned with a bitter smile. “Yeah, thanks Ma.”
Sage
“How did the interviews go?” Sierra strolled into the living room rubbing her eyes. “Please tell me you made coffee,” she groaned even though it was past noon because she’d worked late at the bar.
I shrugged, smiling at her disheveled red hair and Disney pajamas. “One went well, but they’ve just started interviewing so it’ll be a few weeks until I hear from them. The Austin interview was good, but the place is like a conveyor belt office. The horses couldn’t possibly get proper care so I’m not interested.”
“And the other?” she asked from the kitchen, the sound of coffee being poured sounded, and then a long satisfying sigh.
“The other is a no-go. Two of the three on the hiring panel tried to pick me up. Together.”
Sierra spit out her coffee as she came back into the living room, eyes wide. “You’re joking!”
“I wish I was but now I guess I can see why they pay above the rest.” It’s the only reason any woman would subject herself to their individual and joint efforts at getting laid.
“That sucks honey, but you know, you can always sling drinks for me until you find something that works.”
“Thanks,” I told her genuinely, because I appreciated the offer and I might have to take it sooner rather than later if I wanted a place to live. “I’m hoping to finish my hours at the M&M, but if not I’ll have to go somewhere else to finish them.” That would definitely put my plans on hold for even longer if I have to move, find a place to live and work while I completed my hours. I let out a long weary sigh at the thought of it.
“I just got you back Sage. I don’t want you to leave.”
“Believe me I don’t want to, but it’s looking more and more like I’ll have to.”
“There’s no way you and Mason could work things out?”
Just thinking about it had tears forming in my eyes and I shook my head, wiping them away. “No. I mean I hope to finish my hours but I’m working on giving up and getting over him.”
Sierra flashed me a sympathetic smile. “It’ll be easier if you don’t run into him all over Lucky Flats all the time.”
“Yeah, exactly.” Silence settled between us for a long while, but by the time Sierra finished her second cup of coffee, she was ready to chat.
“Don’t be upset, Sage,” she began and immediately my ears perked up.
“W
hy?”
“Jack called.”
I smiled. “Jack called you? Does that mean you’ve decided to go after him?”
She shrugged, but the blush that rose on her pale cheeks told me otherwise. “Maybe but he called before I woke up and I texted him that you got home last night.”
My shoulders fell. “So he’s on his way over?”
“Probably. He’s worried about you.”
I sighed because I knew it was true. “Jack is a worrier. I swear he’s more of a mother hen than you are.” At her insulted look I had to laugh. “Okay I understand, but this is hard for him because his sister and best friend are at odds.”
“Or maybe he’s just trying to make it better for you both.”
“When did you become an optimist and a romantic?” I could always count on Sierra to have a healthy dose of sarcasm and cynicism about all things love and men, so this version of her totally threw me.
“When my best friend finally got a chance with the man of her dreams.”
“Not that it matters,” I added with more snark than necessary just before Jack’s knock sounded.
He strolled in behind Sierra, whose face was now an even brighter shade of pink, and smiled.
“Hey kiddo. How are ya?”
I answered with a shrug. “If I say I’m great will you stop worrying?”
Jack wrapped me in his arms and dropped a kiss on top of my head. “I’ll never stop worrying Sage, you know that.”
Yeah I did but I couldn’t take any more heightened emotion. “Jeez bro, what did they feed you in the Army? You’re rock solid.”
He laughed and flexed under my hand. “Mason said you’re leaving Lucky Flats,” he told me with a dark frown all over his face.
I sighed, wishing I could somehow strangle Mason without seeing his handsome face. “Not yet. I had a few interviews but so far only one is an actual option, so I’m still looking while I hopefully, finish up my hours.”
He pulled back, but kept his hands on my shoulders. “Don’t let Mason run you off from your dream of having a therapy center.”
Cowboy's Fake Fiancée: A Single Dad & A Virgin Romance Page 8