by Ann, Natalie
“Then cut Harris some slack. He’s worked harder than most to get where he was and rotten luck or being in the wrong place at the wrong time had it all taken from him. He’s at a crossroads and he is coping.”
“I just hope he isn’t using you to get him through this tragic part of his life. That once he finds what he is looking for he moves on.”
“What makes you think I’m not what he is looking for?”
She couldn’t believe she said the words she didn’t even believe herself. She came over here planning on telling her parents she was being cautious with Harris and here she was saying everything imaginable to prove otherwise.
“Is he what you are looking for?” her father asked.
“I really don’t know. Maybe I’m just passing the time with him. Maybe I’m using him.”
Her mother clucked her tongue. “You know that’s a lie. You want to settle down with a family and have for years. You haven’t dated anyone seriously after Liam. I was shocked with Liam after Josh. I want to see you move on. I’m just not sure if Harris is the person.”
“Then I guess we all have to wait and see what the future holds. For now I’m going to get the damn watch that caused this whole mess and then I’m going to go home and try to push the day’s events away from my mind and pretend that my family is in my corner and not shoving me into ongoing traffic.”
“Not only is that harsh but it’s overly dramatic,” her father said. “That is something you’re not. Which tells me you are all twisted worse than a tornado.”
She was probably closer to her father than her mother. “Maybe. Are we done with this conversation now? I’d like to go spend time with Harris.”
“We’re done,” her father said. “Be careful, Kaelyn. You always put up a big front, but we know how easily you get hurt.”
“I’m fine,” she said and left.
When she was in her car, she took a few more deep breaths. That didn’t go quite like she thought it would, but at least it was out in the open. Might as well let Harris know what was going on too.
Secrets had never been her thing and she’d been caught hiding behind closed doors more times than not unaware of what was going on. When everyone jumped on her as she opened the door to let her know what she was missing, it was too late. Her heart had been broken like her father said.
17
Target Practice
Harris was in the backyard throwing a tennis ball for Nicks while he waited for Kaelyn to show up. He hadn’t planned on mentioning that he thought Evan noticed the watch, but then figured it might be smart to bring it up. No reason not to and she might appreciate the heads up.
When he heard a car door, Nicks started barking up a storm and went running for the gate. He waited a minute to see if Kaelyn came around back. Once Nicks started to dance around, he figured his puppy could hear her before him.
She popped around the corner of the house by the gate, a big smile on her face to go with the little shorts on her hips. Holy shit that should be illegal.
“Look at you,” he said. She even had a tank top on which wasn’t normal for her.
“I was hot today for some reason. I can’t believe you aren’t sweating just standing out here tossing the ball.” She opened the gate and walked in, pet Nicks on the head, and then picked up one of the balls and threw it.
“It’s not that warm. You forget I’m used to being on a field for hours in this heat.” Even though he hated it he still missed it. Maybe that was why he called the dog to go out and play more and more lately.
“How is the arm?” she asked. “Though I doubt you are throwing the tennis ball a hundred miles an hour for the dog.”
“No,” he said. “I’m just lobbing it in the air.”
“Really?” she asked, walking away from him to the back of the yard. He watched as she ran her hand around a mark on the fence, then laughed. When she returned she said, “Anger or target practice?”
“One that got away from me,” he said, smiling. Maybe he was testing his arm to see what he had. It wasn’t much. Not close to what it was or would ever be again.
“A slider?” she asked.
“A changeup,” he said. “It still left a mark on the fence.”
“You’ve got more strength than you realize.”
“Not what I used to, but enough to dent the fence.”
“If you keep that up you’ll have to replace the back of it.”
“I might have gotten it out of my system,” he said. Or maybe not. Now that she was here he could focus on other things. Sitting around doing nothing was getting to him more than he thought it would.
“That’s good. Can we go in the house? I’m sweating out here.”
“All that sweat dribbling between your breasts is giving me ideas,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows.
“I bet it is,” she said. “First thing I want to do is get my watch before it causes any more problems today.”
Which meant she knew. “About that,” he said.
“I already know. Evan saw it here. Did he say something to you about it? I might just drive over to his house and kick him in the groin like I did as a kid if he gave you as hard of a time as he did me.”
“He gave you a hard time?” he asked, opening the door and holding it for her. Nicks ran through the dog door, loving it now that he got the hang of it. “He didn’t say a word to me but his demeanor changed. I couldn’t figure out what caused it and then when he left I saw the watch there. I can’t believe he figured out it was yours.”
She walked over to the counter where it was sitting. “It was a graduation gift from him and Christian so of course he knew it was mine.”
“And he’s not happy you are seeing me?” he asked. He didn’t normally get reactions like that from the family of women he was dating. Usually just the opposite.
“Evan is a hothead. I know he’s nice and professional and I expected that of him with you. I shouldn’t have assumed he’d say something. But he and Christian ambushed me at home when I got out of work.”
That didn’t sound good. “And they think I’m just using you to pass the time?” he guessed.
“That’s the general consensus. I told them all to get a grip. I’m an adult and can make my own decisions in life. I told them we were just seeing each other. Nothing more than that. It was too soon to know anything else.”
Maybe she wasn’t feeling what he was. For a guy that never wanted more than a few dates with someone he was hoping for a hell of a lot more with Kaelyn.
“So you’re just passing the time with me?” he asked.
He smiled when he said it, trying to joke, but she didn’t smile or laugh. She just walked forward and put her arms around his neck. “I’m taking it one day at a time. I’ve been hurt before. Hurt a lot. I don’t like to talk about it. I don’t like to remember. Today when I pulled into my parents’ driveway I remembered a lot of my childhood here. So many good memories and then some of the bad ones mixed in.”
“Are you going to tell me what they are?” He was running his hand up and down her back; her finger was just tracing the pattern on his T-shirt.
“I just have lousy taste in men. Even going back to high school. I’d have a crush on the jock and he’d pay attention to me only to be able to brag he was with me. I didn’t think I was anything special in school. I was in the popular group, but it’s not like I put out or anything. I wasn’t what one would say was a good time back then with the men.”
He didn’t think that was her and was glad he was right in those thoughts. “I think you’re pretty special now. You probably were back then too. I think we have a lot in common. The same thing happened with me. It’s different with guys though.”
“Most guys like to brag. They don’t get hurt like the girls do. I didn’t put out in high school so most of the time my relationships didn’t last long. They’d move on to someone else and I’d learn my lesson. I went off to college and was older and more mature but still picked the losers.”
“Define losers,” he said. If she said anyone pushed her around he’d find out who the hell it was and go take care of it now.
“Nothing major. No drug users or anything like that. Cheaters though. Those who wanted something from me other than me. And I’m preaching to the choir, as I’m sure that has been your life the past ten plus years.”
“It has been. I’ve told you that. I just want you, Kaelyn. Nothing else. No one else. Only you.”
She tilted her head and smiled at him. “I told my parents that.”
“So they know too,” he said. Just wonderful.
“That is where I was before coming here. Evan went over and filled them in. I thought I’d get the lecture and I did a little. No one knew what was going on and they had questions.”
“What did you say to them?” he asked.
“Not a lot. The obvious is that you are going through a life change.”
He burst out laughing. “That makes it sound like I’m changing my gender.”
She giggled. “You know what I mean. They worried you were just using me until you were ready to figure out your next step. I told them I felt you were here to stay. At least for a while.”
“I am. I’m not going anywhere. It’s not what I would have picked or decided years ago. Even months ago, but it’s where I am. What I do while I’m here, that is another story.”
“You’ll figure it out,” she said.
“So, was your family concerned about rumors regarding me?” he asked, figuring maybe it was time to clear the air some more.
She moved out of his arms and went to the fridge to get a bottle of water. “What rumors are those? I’m sure it’s an invasion of your privacy, but I did Google you. You know that.”
“I wouldn’t have expected any differently. I might have done the same to you.”
Her jaw dropped and he reached his hand over and lifted it back up in place. “There isn’t anything to find out about me.”
“No, there wasn’t, but you never know. I think it’s common practice to try to find out about people now when you are dating them. I didn’t know anyone to ask, so that is what I did. What did you find out about me?”
“Not much. I told you. I’ve seen pictures of you with a lot of women and you explained it to me.”
“Do you believe me?” he asked.
“I have no reason not to,” she said.
“I wouldn’t lie to you. My career has always come first. Women were second.”
“Were? Or still are?”
“Were,” he said. “Past tense. My career is no more.”
“You don’t know what your career is going to be now.”
“It might be a professional gamer since all I do is sit around playing anything I can get my hands on.”
“If you put your mind to it, I’m sure you’d still succeed.”
“I like that you’ve got a lot of faith in me,” he said. “I’ll figure the future out. I guess the question is, do you plan on being by my side with me?”
“That’s a pretty big question,” she said.
“I’m a pretty big guy.”
“I’m not sure how to answer it.”
“So you think I’m not telling you the truth?”
“I want to believe you. Guess I’m just cautious.”
“Skittish,” he corrected her. “Do you know what one of my best pitches was?”
“No clue. Fastball?”
“That was one. The other is a changeup.”
“What you threw at the fence?” she asked.
“Yep. I’m good at trying to deceive people. Making them see one thing and getting something else.”
Her face paled. “That’s not making me feel very good.”
“It should make you feel better. The world saw me as this cocky arrogant son of a bitch. On the field, that was me. Sure it was. In my personal life, no way. But what you saw was only for show. I was good at letting people see what they wanted. You, you are getting the real me.”
Her eyes started to fill. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Now I believe everything you are saying. Not because I’ve seen it but because I feel it. That’s more important to me than anything.”
“I’m glad I could help.”
“You did. And I want to help you,” she said. “I want you to lean on me.”
“I’m not used to leaning on anyone,” he admitted.
“You can show your vulnerability with me though.”
“I have. I will. My family and you are the only ones that have seen it.”
However hard it was for him to let it out, he knew he had no choice. He couldn’t hold back what he was feeling. Or what he wanted. He wanted Kaelyn and he hoped he gave her that impression without laying all his cards on the table.
She lifted her hands up and cupped his cheeks. “You know you’re pretty damn special too.”
“Maybe we are just two special people waiting for each other.”
“Maybe,” she said softly.
18
Watering The Roots
Toward the end of July, Harris took Nicks for a walk. The bigger the dog got, the longer he could go. If Harris didn’t hate running so much, he’d probably be able to take the dog on a run with him. As it was, he walked the dog at least once a day and threw the ball in the yard with him too.
Physical therapy was over in his mind. Now he was just exercising daily. Stretching his arm, shoulder, and ankle were second nature to him. The same with lifting weights daily and training as if he were going back on the field.
Some habits were just hard to break and why not stay fit and healthy? No reason to turn around and sit on his butt daily playing video games like he joked he was.
Unfortunately, he found he really was, which was part of the reason he forced the daily workouts back into his routine.
Since Nicks was itching to take off, Harris decided to check out more of the development. He knew there was a common area around here, baseball fields, volleyball courts, playgrounds, and a pavilion. Why not see what there was offered in Paradise Place. The place he was calling home for now.
Maybe longer than for now. Wasn’t he going to go ahead and buy the land next to him so he could avoid neighbors? He was putting down roots. Or watering the roots he had in this area from childhood.
Whatever terms people wanted to put on it, he was staying.
He just needed to get Kaelyn to believe that.
She was skittish. He didn’t need her to tell him that, he could see it daily. But they were making it work. He was happy. A different kind of happy than he’d had for the past ten years.
One that he hadn’t been sure he’d find or was even looking for.
Now he had nothing else in his life.
Kaelyn. She was in his life and she was his focus.
He knew he’d need another one, but after years of working so hard, dedicating everything he had to baseball, he was struggling with his free time.
“Slow down, Nicks,” Harris said when the dog started to tug him some more. “We’re going further and you need your strength.”
He’d checked out the map of the development online and tried to memorize what streets he needed to turn down to get to the common area. Since he was in the new area, he was much further away than those fields and playgrounds that had been around since almost the beginning of the development.
When he finally found where he was heading, he saw kids everywhere, every age. Some on the swings and slides, some in the pavilion hanging out on their phones and talking. A few were playing a game of volleyball and there was a game of about ten kids on the baseball field. Five in the field, five batting. A makeup game, and he suspected though they were friends, they might all play in leagues or in school.
He walked closer, judged their ages to be a mixture of middle and high school. Maybe the older helping the younger. Either way, he remembered those days well.
Nicks wanted to just check everyone ou
t at once, but he held the dog back and watched the kids on the field. There was even a girl getting up to bat right now.
The pitcher lifted his left leg up, drew back, and let a fastball fly to the catcher. He could tell these two worked together the most.
That girl held her ground and didn’t back up from the pitch, but swung. She missed, as it was a damn good pitch, but she had no fear.
Second pitch was a slider and took off having the girl jump back. She laughed, “Come on, you can’t scare me that easily.”
There was laughter all around. The pitcher grinned, but Harris knew the kid just lost control. He’d done it himself plenty.
Next pitch was another fastball, swing and miss. Third pitch the same thing and the girl connected and ran to first base but was thrown out.
“You can’t always send the same pitch or they’ll know what is coming,” Harris said before he could stop himself.
There was silence as all the kids on the field stopped and turned to him. Some whispers were going around and finally someone said, “You look like Harris Walker.”
“You think?” he said with a grin.
“Oh my God, you idiots. Of course it’s him,” the girl said. “Look at the scar on his arm.”
He snorted. Kids had no filter, but in this case it was pretty obvious.
“She’s right,” he said.
“What are you doing here?” another kid asked, all of them coming forward.
“Can we have your autograph?”
“I want it too.”
“I need a pen.”
“Let me get my hat. Can you stay here while I run home and get it?”
Questions were flying at him out of control like the pitcher’s slider.
“Wow,” he said. “I’ll take them in order. First, I live here, or around here. Yes, you can have my autograph if someone has a sharpie. Sure, go get your hat. I’ll stay and wait. I’ll be around more though if I’m gone when you get back.”