“With my life,” I say without thought. I may have not known Lilly was my sister, but I love that little girl. And even when my dad was home, and I had Lilly, he never came around us. Never even looked at her in passing. He acted as if she didn’t exist.
He leans in and kisses my forehead. “I know.”
Tears start to well in my eyes. “I’m so sorry, Cole. For what Bruce did to your mother.” My chest tightens. “I’m so sorry that I didn’t know about Lilly sooner. I could have helped …” My voice cracks. “I could have come back here. I should have …” I choke on the words.
He reaches out and pulls me to him. I bury my face into his shirt and inhale that scent that I’ve missed the past two weeks. “It’s not your fault, Austin.” He kisses my hair. “You didn’t know.” He sighs. “I was afraid of losing her. To you. To Bruce. Even Celeste held her over my head. She helped me raise her the first few years. I was twelve when she was born and knew nothing about babies. My dad didn’t want her and neither did Bruce. But I wanted her. She was part of me.” He smiles softly at me. “Part of my mom.”
The first tear falls down my cheek. He wipes it away with a small smile. “But you’re here now, Austin. And I don’t plan on you going anywhere.”
“I …” I pause, not knowing what to say.
“What is it, sweetheart?” he asks softly.
I shake my head and pull away from him. “What is your end game?’
“What?” he asks, standing.
I wipe the tears from my face and look up at him. “What do you want from me?” My heart pounds at those words. That his answer isn’t gonna be what I want to hear.
He frowns.
I stand. “No more games, Cole. Now more secrets. And no more lies. Just tell me …” I let out a long breath. “What is it that you want from me?” He’s gonna break my heart, and I deserve it because I allowed it. You don’t fall in love with a man like him and expect him to feel the same about you. It doesn’t work that way.
He cups my face with both of his hands. “I want you, Austin. That is not a lie.”
“You want to break me—”
“Not anymore,” he interrupts me. “I did want that, yes. But it’s no longer enough.”
“What does that mean?” I whisper.
He pushes his body into me. He tilts my head back, and he lowers his lips to mine. A simple kiss that takes my breath away. This man has taken so much from me already. I’m not sure I have anything else to give.
“I want you to want me. I want you to need me.” His eyes search mine. “Because that’s how I feel about you. I’m not the same since I met you. You have bled for me, but I’m starving for you. People say when you meet the one you love, that person can calm you down. Make you better.” He shakes his head. “You fucking fan my flames. You make me feel invincible.” He sighs heavily. “You deserve better than me,” he whispers, placing his head against mine, “but I’m too selfish to let you go.”
I give him a soft smile. “I want you just the way you are.” He pulls away. I cup his cheek. This man is the devil himself, but I’ve never been afraid of hell. “And I’m not going anywhere.”
He gently kisses my lips. “What about Kellan?” I ask, knowing we have a long way to go. And that he is pissed at me.
“Everything is gonna be all right, Austin. Trust me.”
As my eyes search his, I realize just how much I want him to be right. “I trust you, Cole,” I say, licking my wet lips, tasting my tears.
He watches the motion and leans forward but comes to a stop with his lips inches from mine. I lean in, closing the distance and pressing mine to his. His fingers slide into my hair, and I moan into his mouth as his tongue meets mine. That familiar feeling that only he can give me starts to build, and I wrap my arms around his neck.
Two weeks of not even looking at him has me worked up.
He pulls away. “Austin, we shouldn’t.”
God, I’ve missed him. My body craves him in an unhealthy way.
“I want you,” I say breathlessly.
His eyes search mine and then land on my stitches. He gives me a small smile and takes my hand, pulling me up to the loft.
Then his lips are on mine. The next thing I know, he is undressing me.
“Fuck! I’ve missed you,” he growls before nibbling on my lip.
“Me too …” I trail off, sucking in a deep breath. “I want you.” I pant as my hands go to his jeans.
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
COLE
I lie next to her. My heart pounding, and her breathing is still ragged. I turn onto my side and push her hair from her damp face. Her eyes are closed and a soft smile on her lips.
She opens her eyes, and her smile widens. “Who owns this place?” she asks.
I frown.
“You guys spend a lot of time here. Does someone’s dad own it?”
“I own it.”
Her eyes widen in surprise. “You own it?”
I nod. “When my mother passed, she left Lilly and me each a trust fund. I got access to mine when I turned eighteen and bought this that day. It was abandoned and cheap. The guys and I wanted a place to get away, so it just made sense.”
She nods. “When you told me what my dad tried to do to you, I thought that he had something to do with your mother passing.”
“The thought crossed my mind for many years,” I admit.
“But not anymore?”
I shake my head. “Although I miss her and wish she could have been here to see Lilly grow up, I think it was just something that happened. I was angry about it for a very long time, but it was no one’s fault.”
She lies down and runs her hand over my chest. “Why did you quit the group?”
“Because it wasn’t safe for you, and I knew you wouldn’t drop out unless there was no longer a group at all.”
“So it’s just over?” she asks.
“Yeah,” I say with a smile. “It’s just over.”
“What do we do now?” she wonders.
“We enjoy what’s left of our senior year as a real couple.”
She gets up and straddles my hips. I place my hands on her bare thighs as she smiles down at me. Even with a bruised eye and stitches in her face, she is still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.
“Does this mean you’re gonna go to prom with me?” she asks.
I laugh. “Yes. That’s exactly what it means.”
“Guess I better start looking for a red dress then.” She wiggles her eyebrows.
I groan. “I love when you wear red.”
She gives me her wicked smile that makes my cock hard. “I know.” She leans down, giving me a soft kiss.
I pull back. “What are your plans after graduation?”
“Haven’t really thought about it. Why?”
I take a deep breath and let it out. “You know when I had you take Lilly to ballet and I was gone the following day? I told you I had something personal to do?”
“How can I forget? That’s when Celeste pretended to be sleeping with you.”
I ignore that. “I was in Texas.”
Her eyes widen. “You flew to Texas?” I nod. “Why?”
“Deke and I have scholarships to the University of Texas. And I needed to see my counselor about housing because I’m taking Lilly with me, and kids can’t live in the dorms.”
Her eyes fall to my chest. “Oh. I didn’t think about Lilly leaving with you.”
I place my hand in her hair and force her to look back up at me. “While I was there, I bought a house for Lilly and me.” Texas is where I’m going to call home for the rest of my life. I’m gonna go to college there and swim while I get my degree. Then Deke and I are gonna open our own business together. We’ve had it planned for years.
Her eyes widen once again, but she says nothing.
“And I want you to come with us. I want you to live with me and Lilly.”
“Cole … that’s …” She licks her lips. “Too much.”
<
br /> “No, it’s not.” I sit up. “Tell me you’ll come with us. Tell me you’ll live with us.”
“If you want, I can help you with her …”
“No, Austin. You’re not understanding me. I want you there to be part of Lilly’s life, but I want you there for my life too.” I run my hand through her hair. “Move in with me, Austin.” I can’t imagine my life without her. This amazing woman is everything I never knew I wanted. And in case I had any doubt, the past two weeks without her made me realize just how true that is.
Her dark green eyes start to well up with tears. “I don’t know …”
“You dared me to show you a side of me that no one sees. And I have, Austin. Now I’m daring you to give me a chance to be more than the guy who hurt you.” I give her a soft smile. “Move in with me and let me show you that I can be what you need.”
AUSTIN
Cole and I walk into my father’s house. “What do you wanna do today?” he asks me with a smile on his face. It’s been two weeks since my birthday, and things have been going great. Too great if you ask me. I’ve never considered my life to be normal, but things have been just that. Cole and I spent all of spring break together hanging out with Becky and Deke or just chilling at my house with Lilly. My bruised face had healed some by the time we went back to school. Shelby removed the stitches, but the bruises are still visible without makeup. But no one questioned it. Shane and Bennett have been calling Cole, but he keeps their conversations short when he does answer. I think he’s mad at them for not throwing Kellan out of the group when he and Deke first suggested it. And as for Kellan—he’s been everywhere this last week. Over spring break, it was easy to avoid him, but now that school is back in session, not so much. He’s everywhere I look and always smiling at me. It gives me the creeps and pisses Cole off. And I hate that I’m always looking over my shoulder. When I’m not in school, I always have the Taser on me, prepared to use it at any given second.
“Let’s take Lilly to the zoo,” I offer.
He nods. “Sounds good to me.”
“Austin? Is that you?” I hear Celeste call out.
Instead of answering, I walk down the hall, Cole’s hand in mine, and enter the living room. I come to a halt when I see she’s not alone.
Cole’s hand tightens on mine. “Mom?” I shriek. “What the hell are you doing here?”
I never did respond to her text she sent me on my birthday. And she never sent me another one.
She smiles brightly at me. Her green eyes go to my hand in Cole’s, then she looks him up and down before her eyes return to me. They trace over my face, and I square my shoulders, knowing she can see the faint bruise. We just got back from spending the night at his clubhouse, and I didn’t put any makeup on. She allowed Phillip to hit me, but he also hit her. I’m sure she thinks Cole did this to me.
Celeste clears her throat and pushes her blond hair behind her ear nervously. “Your mother wanted to come and give you the good news in person,” she says.
“Good news?” I ask arching a brow.
My mother smiles brightly and holds out her left hand. “We got married.”
My eyes go to Phillip for the first time as he sits on the couch next to my mother. He doesn’t smile at me; instead, his eyes take in my face. My freshly fucked hair and lack of clothing. I’m wearing Cole’s black zip-up hoodie and a pair of cotton shorts and tennis shoes. That’s it. No shirt underneath and no bra, which is why it is zipped all the way up to my neck. Cole ripped both off me last night.
Cole takes a step forward, jerking on my hand, reminding me he is here. I pull him to a stop.
“When did this happen?” I ask, trying to figure out why she’s here. Why she thought I would need to know this. I couldn’t care less what they do. You would think she already knew that.
“Two weeks ago.” She claps her hands. “On St. Paddy’s day.”
I’m not surprised.
“You married this piece of shit on your daughter’s birthday?” Cole growls, finally speaking.
My mother narrows her eyes on him, and Phillip stands, bowing out his chest, thinking he’s the superior man in this room. He’s not. “I don’t know who you are, son, but I’d suggest you not talk to her mother that way.”
Cole snorts. “I’m not your son, and she’s sure as hell not a mother to her.”
My mother shoots to her feet. “Who the hell is this, Celeste?” she demands.
“His name is Cole, and he’s my boyfriend,” I snap.
Celeste runs a hand through her hair. “I think it’s time you and Phillip go.” She clears her throat. “You got what you were promised.”
“Promised?” Cole questions.
I don’t care what they are talking about. I just want them gone.
Phillip chuckles, throwing his arm over my mother’s shoulders. “It’s adult business, son. You wouldn’t understand.” Phillip looks at me. He stares at my eye again and smirks. “Guess I trained you right.” Then he looks at Cole and winks.
“Out!” Celeste snaps.
I stand frozen to my spot as they walk past us and down the hall. Celeste follows them out and shuts the door behind them.
“What the fuck was that?” Cole demands, letting go of my hand.
Celeste joins us once again and sighs. “It’s nothing—”
“Bullshit!” he interrupts her, making me jump. “Why the hell were they here and what were they promised?”
She looks at me and then down at the floor.
“I don’t want to know,” I say softly.
Cole looks at me, and his features soften. “Austin …”
“I don’t care, Cole. Don’t you see? She got what she wanted. She got rid of me, and she got him to marry her.” Then I turn, walk out of the room, and head up the stairs to my bedroom. I sit down on the end of the bed and pull my cell out of his pocket, going to my mom’s number. I hover over it for a few seconds, trying to remember a time when she was actually a mother to me. When she hugged me. Kissed me. Tucked me in. Any time that she actually acted like she cared about my well-being. And I come up with nothing.
I delete her number as the door opens. Cole walks in and kneels in front of me. “I gotta go,” he says, pushing some hair from my face.
“Where are you going?” I ask. “I thought we were gonna take Lilly to the zoo?”
He nods. “Later. I got something I have to go do.” Standing up to his full height, he leans over and kisses me on the forehead. His phone starts to ring in the pocket of his jeans, and he pulls it out. I see Deke flash across it. He silences it. “Why don’t you go and get Lilly and then meet me at the clubhouse,” he offers, and I nod.
“Here.” I stand and remove his hoodie. His eyes go to my naked chest, and his hands grab my hips.
“Are you trying to distract me?” he asks roughly.
“No,” I say honestly. “Just thought you would want it back.”
He leans down and kisses my cheek. Then his eyes meet mine. I wait for him to give me something—some indication of where he is going or why Deke is calling him—but he doesn’t. Some things about Cole will never change.
He turns and walks out, and I sit back down, knowing that deleting my mother’s phone number was pointless. She won’t be calling me anymore anyway, but I’m okay with that. Like Cole said, she was never my mother.
I’m pulling a shirt over my head when there’s a knock on the door. “Come in,” I call out.
The door opens, and Celeste peeks her head in. “May I speak to you?” she asks.
“Do I have a choice?” I reply.
She sighs heavily. “I wanna explain myself,” she says entering. “I haven’t really had the chance …”
“You’ve been avoiding me,” I argue.
She nods once. “I have, and I’m sorry.” She swallows. “I wanna explain about Kellan too …”
“I don’t care about Kellan,” I growl, interrupting her.
“He’s just worried!”
“Worried?” I snort. “About what?”
“About you and Cole.”
I don’t respond to that because she has no idea what is going on between us. And she doesn’t need to know.
Running a hand through her hair, she takes a step farther into my room. “I’m sorry that Cole hurt you.”
“He didn’t do it.”
“Austin, I know you think he loves you, but he doesn’t.” She shakes her head as she looks me up and down as if I’m not good enough for him.
“This has nothing to do with love,” I grind out.
Her brown eyes soften, and her look turns to pity. “You were lucky this time. But next time …”
“Kellan did this to me,” I say, pointing at my face, unable to listen to this anymore.
She shakes her head. “No. He wouldn’t do that.”
Unbelievable. “Cole found my phone in Kellan’s car.”
Her hands fist. “If Cole found your phone in his car, then it was because Cole planted it there.”
“Jesus.” I hiss. “He has you brainwashed.”
“Kellan is trying to help you. Cole wants to hurt you,” she shouts, finding her anger. “That’s why Kellan wants you out of the group. He’s mad at you, but he’s trying to protect you in the long run.”
I shake my head at her words. She says Kellan wants me out of the group. But when Cole tried to get me thrown out, Kellan was the only one who wanted me to stay. So either Kellan hasn’t filled her in on what’s going on or he’s lying to her. “You have no clue what you are talking about,” I say, not wanting to argue with her.
“You don’t know what Cole is capable of.”
Oh, I do! “Apparently, I don’t know what any of you are capable of because I would have never thought you’d call out my boyfriend’s name while you fucked his friend,” I snap.
Her eyes darken, and her lips thin. She takes a step toward me. “Don’t push me, Austin.”
I Dare You Page 33