She’d drifted close to him, reached out a hand and cupped his cheek. “Please don’t cover your body just yet,” she whispered. Her pupils had dilated, a clear hint of how she felt. She rubbed her palm along the stubble covering his jaw, went so far as to draw the inside of her wrist against those short hairs. Hunger reflected in her face.
“What… what are you doing?” The words were tugged from a tight throat as her feather-light touch heightened the awareness he always had every time she came near. Every hair on his body stood to attention.
“Exploring you since I’ve not had the opportunity to really see my husband.” She stood in front of him, smoothing her palms along the sides of his neck and sweeping her hands along the breadth of his shoulders. With each glance of her fingers, need shuddered through him. Hints of something deeper, stronger pulled at his heart.
“Do you like what you see?” he couldn’t help asking, for vanity demanded she acknowledge his face and form.
“Very much so.” She ran those digits through the mat of hair on his chest, and she sighed. “I adore how hairy you are. It’s so crisp, coarse. I cannot stop petting you.”
He alternately wished she would and would not, for he craved her touch.
Alice took his hand and guided him away from the bathtub into a clear space. Then she returned to her exploration by slipping behind him and smoothing her hands over the planes of his back. She gasped as she squeezed his biceps. “You are quite lean, muscled, powerful.” His wife ran her palms over his skin, and with every pass his need for her grew. When she pressed her mouth to his left shoulder and lightly nipped him, an involuntary moan escaped him.
“Do you know what you do to me?” he asked in a barely-there whisper. He stood still, not daring to move and break the spell she wove over him.
She smiled against his skin, and he felt every bit of that gesture. “Perhaps you are not the only one who can master a seduction.” Alice remained behind him, tracing her fingertips down his spine, and when she plucked at the towel, it fell away from his waist to land on the floor at his feet. Then her hands slid over his hips, holding him, measuring him, and when she gripped his arse cheeks, he sucked in a sharp breath. “Such beauty of form.” A trace of awe lingered in her voice. “You resemble a statue of a Roman god I once saw in the baron’s home.”
“Alice…” His length hardened. “Please.” Was it a plea for her to cease her ministrations or for her to let him take her into his arms?
Finally, she came back around until she faced him, and she smiled as she cupped his equipage in her soft palm.
Damnation, he would spend if he wasn’t careful.
But his wife wasn’t done with her torment. She fondled his bits before leaving off and kneeling. She swept her hands up and down his legs, glanced her fingertips along the inside of his thighs, exploring every inch of him. When she reached his ankles, she came back up until she finally paused with her hands primly folded in her lap.
“Well?” The question was breathless, dancing over the last of his control. Donovan furrowed his fingers into her hair in an effort to do something that wasn’t throwing her to the floor and having his way with her.
“Most satisfying.” She tilted her face upward, her gaze connecting with his even though he knew she couldn’t see him. “Please shift into the beast for me.”
“No.” He shook his head. “Not now.” They were newly married and he’d rather lie with her than show her the unsavory side of himself. Doing so might tip his hand… or force hers.
The pout upon her kissable lips nearly undid him. “Please, Donovan. I need to see you in wolf form.” She placed a hand on his knee, the heat of her seeping into him. “In order for me to understand all of what you are burdened with, I must see the other side of you.”
“It will change your mind about me, about the curse.” He curled his free hand into a fist. Everything would turn to muck once she saw…
“Or it will firm my decision to help you.” Alice gained her feet. She framed his face with her palms, put her forehead to his and peered into his eyes. “I love you, Donovan. Through everything, that hasn’t changed. I want to see you in your entirety.” After brushing his lips with hers, she said, “Please. I’m made of stronger stuff than you think. I won’t cower or run away.” She traced his bottom lip with her thumb. “I promised you my fidelity, and you will have that for as long as you need, but don’t shut me out.”
The sincerity in her voice, her manner, pulled him under. He longed for the sanctuary she represented but life had taught him not to hope, for women were fickle. Yet the longer he stood before her, his gaze locked on hers, the more he wanted to believe. His pulse throbbed through his being in both fear and anticipation.
She wishes to see you, human, to see me, his wolf urged, adding fuel to his confusion.
Can I survive if she reacts to me with horror or pity?
There is only one way to tell, came the canine response. Then, cheeky bastard that he was, he added, what does it matter if you don’t care for her anyway?
Cheeky bastard. Finally, he nodded. “Step away. At times the beast is startled if there is someone too near when I complete the shift.”
When Alice did as he asked, Donovan sighed. Anxiety twisted through his gut. No one, not even his sister, had known him thusly, let alone seen him, as the wolf. Rogue had on occasion, for they were both creatures of the night, but no one human had. It was a personal choice and it was frightening as hell. But for one brunette beauty with big eyes and a bigger heart, he would break his own rule.
Then he called the shift.
Agony descended. Bones snapped and broke as they formed into a canine. Internal organs re-ordered themselves to fit the new, smaller body. Networks of blood vessels and nerves reformed, spreading out through growing limbs. His nose elongated. Teeth were ripped out and grew again to fit the new lengthened jawline. A tail sprouted where there was none. Fur populated and pushed through skin until the new canine form was covered with brownish ruddy hairs. Ears and eyes resituated on a new skull until finally, painfully, he became the wolf.
A low, warning growl echoed through the room as he shook his head and trained his wolfish eyes on Alice. Donovan ruffled his fur, his hackles raised at finding himself inside a house, which was not the place for a wild animal. The sense of being trapped filled him and he took a few steps toward her—the woman who’d insisted he become the beast. He bared his teeth. Did she wish him harm?
“Hush now,” she whispered, her eyes wide with fear and a hand outstretched. To give her credit, she held her ground, but her hand shook.
He paused, waiting, his eyes narrowed, his muscles tensed to run or attack as the whim took him. It was odd, this pausing to gauge her reaction. If she ran, would he give chase?
Want her to run with us.
Donovan snorted, and Alice started. She came forward another step, nearly touching him now. How the devil do you think she could do that? We’d outpace her soon after the chase began. She is human, and will be for the rest of her life. While he only had a chance of the same, depending on her love and a full moon and an ancient gypsy witch’s will.
She is good, will save us, his wolf insisted.
Donovan huffed, narrowed his eyes further. From what, the curse? If so, you will cease to exist.
Then Alice kneeled on the ground until she was at eye level with him. She brought her face close to his, apparently not caring about his growl or his teeth, and she cupped the side of his wolfish face. “Oh, Donovan, you poor thing. The shift, it hurt you, I could hear it… feel it.”
His wolf, in control, answered with a whine. But then he snapped at her fingers, growled again in warning, for no one dared to touch him as the wolf.
“None of that,” she quietly instructed with a tap to his snout that had him uttering a whine and dipping his front half down slightly in submission.
What the hell? I do not bow to anyone as the wolf. What had the woman done to him?
“That’s
better. No need to get ugly because you’re afraid.” Tears sparkled in her expressive eyes. The silver flecks danced within the irises. “I had no idea. What you’ve dealt with your whole life staggers me.” Just as she had when he’d been in human form, she explored his wolf body with her hands and fingertips. “I knew when you saved me that first morning of our meeting it wasn’t a dog that pushed into me.”
Her fingers riffling through his fur gave him pause. A novel sensation to be sure. Donovan cocked his head, his gaze still connected to hers. What did she think about, seeing her husband reduced to an animal—a beast? His heart lurched. Did she think less of him?
“This is…” She traced his snout, his ears, his wolfish eyebrows. “You are amazing.” Awe hung on her words and mirrored in her eyes.
He sat on his haunches as a numbed sort of shock filled him. His wolf, on the other hand, yipped in the beginning stages of excitement.
“It’s remarkable, this change,” she continued as she examined him: paws, tail, teeth, snout, ears. Everywhere she touched she left tingles of awareness behind as if her fingers revitalized him somehow. “It is unreal, and I would never believe it if I wasn’t seeing it myself.” A little laugh escaped her. “Well, not exactly seeing in the traditional way.”
When she held out a hand, Donovan placed a front paw into her palm. She is not afraid. He couldn’t wrap his brain around the evidence of his own eyes.
She is our mate. There is no fear in one fated for us.
It wasn’t fate that brought her to us. I manipulated the situation. I played a game with her, used her so her love will free me at the full moon. The knowledge tightened his chest, and even in wolf form, he hated himself.
You wouldn’t have found her if not for fate, the wolf continued, adamant something beyond himself was at play.
Then Alice leaned forward and pressed her lips to the fur between his eyes. She sat back on her heels with a wobbly smile and released his paw. “You are truly a wolf. Incredible.” Then she gasped and lowered her voice. “If the ton discovers your secret… If society knows, you will be captured, locked in an institution. That is worse than the curse.”
Donovan shook his head. His wolf whined. How could he make her understand that the legends and rumors made certain no one of consequence socialized with him enough to delve deeper into the truth? He wished it to remain that way, and in essence keep everyone safe.
She glanced at him again and tears shimmered in her eyes. “Please be careful. I cannot lose you due to this.” A few of the crystalline drops fell to her cheeks.
He crept closer until his front paws touched the skirts of her night dress pooled on the floor. How the devil could he comfort her as the beast?
I know how, his wolf replied. He surged to his feet, almost giddy at the prospect.
Before Donovan could protest, the wolf moved. He put his front paws on Alice’s shoulders, and then he licked her face, lapping the tears away, his tail wagging, much to Donovan’s eternal mortification.
What in the bloody hell are you doing? We look like nodcocks. Such indignity!
“Oh, you sweet little wolfie,” she crooned and giggled as she wrapped her arms around his canine neck to hug him close.
Dear heaven above, I shall die of embarrassment, Donovan vowed, but his wolf didn’t pay the slightest attention to him. He tried again while ignoring the sense of safety and comfort cycling through him to feel her arms about him… loving him while he was the wolf. Has she forgotten I am still a duke and a bloody wolf to boot? I should be feared.
Then she scratched behind his ears.
What the devil is happening?
Do shut up, human.
He uttered a half-sigh, half-whine, for the scratching felt so damn good. His tongue lolled out of his slightly open jaws, and when she laughed and kissed his nose, he bumped her chin with the top of his head.
I want her, he told his wolf. Never had he given a woman such access to his private life before, and never had anyone ever accepted him—all of him—with such enthusiasm.
You know what to do, his wolf reminded him with a new level of cheek he hadn’t shown before. He licked Alice’s face again and with a push, she tumbled backward onto the Oriental rug. She laughed as he lay on top of her, stretching out so he covered her like a thick, furry blanket. And through it all, she kept hold of him, petting him, soothing him, loving him like no other person had ever done before.
He couldn’t wait any longer. Donovan called the shift, and when it concluded and exhaustion seeped into his limbs, he didn’t care. He held his wife in his arms and joined in on her laughter. How long had it been since he unbent and allowed such carefree behavior reign? It removed the fear and confusion from the transformation, made the pain and tiredness fade. His heart squeezed, and he lost a piece of it to her in that moment.
“You, my lord, are quite magnificent,” she whispered and held his face between her palms while staring into his eyes.
With his forehead pressed to hers, he grinned. “As the animal or as the man?” His length tightened insistently against her belly.
“Both.” The huskiness of her laugh worked to undo him. “While I prefer the man for obvious reasons, I must say I’m not certain what you’d be like without your other half. It’s quite a unique problem to have.”
Another wave of shock moved through him, and her sparkling eyes had him tumbling down, down, down into the depths of that gaze. “You aren’t disgusted or fearful of him?”
“Not at all.” Alice slipped a hand about his nape and pulled him to her for a kiss. “Make no mistake, it’s bizarre. But I’m willing to acclimate myself to it because, at the heart of the matter, the wolf is you and you are him. Now that I’ve seen you transform, there is no delineation.”
Donovan stared at her as if seeing her for the first time. There were no words he could utter equal to what she’d just given him, didn’t know what to think, so he did what he excelled at: he proceeded to kiss his wife senseless.
Tonight he’d make love to her without expectations, lies, or barriers. Tonight, it was only him and her.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
October 2, 1815
Night of ball and first night of the full moon
“I cannot believe this night is finally here,” Alice whispered to Elizabeth and her maid, Mary, as they helped put the finishing touches of her ensemble for the evening.
The knowledge that the full moon was upon them made her both giddy with excitement and had tears climbing her throat from the implications. Once the night was through, there would be no turning back—from anything. When the curse was lifted and Donovan became fully human, she couldn’t imagine what would happen between them, for it had never been spoken.
“You will certainly make a splash through the ton this evening,” Elizabeth said with encouragement in her voice. The blob that represented her came colored in deepest navy that sparkled each time she moved.
“It is not society I hope to impress tonight.” Nerves bedeviled her belly. The night was important in so many ways. But if she failed to set him free? Merciful heavens, I cannot worry about that now.
“The duke won’t know what to think of you,” Mary whispered as she fussed with the hem of Alice’s ball gown. The lavender satin flowed over like water around her. A fine overskirt of sheer white tulle fell from a heavily embroidered bodice. Swaths of white lace embroidered with tiny flowers lined her décolletage and draped over the shoulders. It shimmered in the light. “Love will surely be in his eyes tonight, my lady,” the maid breathed with the awe of romance in her tone.
Alice applied herself to the task of drawing on white, elbow-length gloves while anxiety knotted in her stomach. “If only,” she whispered to herself.
After he’d shifted into wolf form for her, she’d come to a better understanding of what drove her husband. It had a been a fearsomely wonderful act to witness, but when she’d stared into the eyes of the beast, she’d seen Donovan deep in those amber depths, and if that
humanity could still shine forth through the animal, there was hope.
They’d made love on the floor when he transformed back into the form of a man, and the laughter they’d shared warmed her heart, brought them closer, and it gave her hope that perhaps he could indeed come to care for her.
She’d spent yesterday exclusively in his company. He’d taken her on a tour of London, where they visited typical sites of tourist interest. They’d strolled Hyde Park while talking on a variety of topics that had nothing to do with love or his cursed status. During tea, she’d gone over tentative plans for her school, and he’d tweaked them with encouragement and enthusiasm that had warmed her heart. Following dinner, they’d removed to her rooms where they spent the night together, doing what newly married couples did.
It had been a wonderful interlude she hadn’t wished to end, but as with everything in life, of course it did. Such devotion from him was naught but an act, a final effort to ensure that she’d fallen so deeply in love with him that there’d be no doubt the curse would lift after the ball.
Alice’s chin quivered with the wont to cry in frustration and despair. Was his former existence so coveted that he’d throw her over once he was free in order to resume that carefree bachelor’s life?
“Don’t give into tears so early in the evening,” Elizabeth cautioned with the stroke of her fingertips along Alice’s cheek. “It’ll mottle your complexion and the moisture will stain your gown.” She put her face close so that Alice could see. “It’ll come out right in the end. You have to believe.”
“What if—”
“Hush.” Her sister-in-law laid her hands on Alice’s shoulders. “Enjoy the moment and the ball. Promise me you won’t worry. Otherwise, it’s simply too much to take in.” With a few soft-spoken words, she dismissed the maid. When she’d gone and the door closed behind her, Elizabeth said, “I know what it’s like to think about the bloody curse until you’ll go mad. But you mustn’t let that prohibit delight in life right now.”
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