Don't Break This Kiss (Top Shelf Romance Book 5)

by Jessica Hawkins

  “Well, I’m here to help. My ex-girlfriend is a beauty blogger and influencer, and she helps me figure out what I’m supposed to wear, too.”

  “Your ex helps you?”

  “Yeah, we just weren’t a good fit as a couple, but she loves dressing me, so it’s what I do. And I can probably help you out, if you want. But I can also leave if it gets to be too much. Because I am a bit much sometimes. Believe me, all of my brothers and my best friend, Marcus, tell me that all the time.”

  Arden just laughed and let the other woman have her way.

  It was weird. Very weird. In any other circumstance, this would have felt a little like stalking, and a bit like Arden had hit her head. But there was just something about Bristol that made it seem…okay. Probably any other person on the Earth would have made this completely strange and nonsensical, but Bristol was just amazing. She put Arden at ease and made her laugh.

  In the hour that Bristol was there, Arden was fluffed and cleaned and buffed and made adorable. She’d even been put in something from the back of her closet, similar to what Lacey had picked out, just with a little more pizzazz.

  And she borrowed Bristol’s earrings, which could be odd, but this evening had already been bizarre enough, so it wasn’t too bad.

  In the end, Arden felt like she had made a friend.

  There was just something about Bristol Montgomery.

  It was probably the Montgomerys in general. After all, she was going on a date with one of them in the next twenty minutes.

  “Okay, you have my number, and I even put my address in your phone just in case you want to show up at my house randomly to get payback or something.”

  “No, if payback is needed, I’d probably send one of my brothers,” Arden said with a laugh.

  Bristol’s eyes brightened. “You have four brothers, right?”

  “Yes, but I wouldn’t wish them on my worst enemy.”

  “They can’t be that bad. I know brothers.”

  “They aren’t bad. Actually, they’re pretty amazing and sweet and caring. They’re just overprotective, and I’m in a tiff with them right now, so I don’t want to inflict them on you.”

  “I think you mean inflict me on them, but that’s fine.”

  “Thank you for this.”

  “Thank you for letting me in the door. As soon as I got here, I realized that what sounded like a good plan in my head was probably actually the worst plan in the history of plans. Thank you for not calling the police on me. Or Liam. Even though I know you’re going to talk about it with him later. I’ll deal with the consequences of that then. But you look amazing, and I hope you have a wonderful time. Anything that makes Liam smile right now is worth the scolding I’ll likely get later.”

  “Thanks again,” Arden said, ignoring what Bristol had mentioned in passing. It seemed that Liam Montgomery truly had some secrets, but Arden wasn’t surprised by that. After all, he’d mentioned that he had some stuff to deal with. And it seemed Bristol knew what it was.

  Arden said goodbye to the other woman, made sure Jasper was fed, and then looked down at herself, wondering if she was making a mistake.

  Today had already been weird, and she was afraid what might happen once Liam showed up. Would things get stranger?

  The doorbell rang again, and Arden went to open it, her breath catching when she looked at the very sexy, very real Liam Montgomery on the other side of the door.

  Chapter 9

  Liam leaned back in his chair and couldn’t keep his eyes off the woman on the other side of the table.

  He had known that Arden was beautiful, pretty, gorgeous. He had known she was stunning.

  It didn’t matter that the first time he had seen her, she’d had a rash on her face and on her arms, and had been sick enough to warrant a visit to the hospital. It hadn’t negated the fact that he found her beautiful.

  In fact, it was her inner strength and the beauty that came from that smile of hers even when he knew she was in pain that had turned him towards her in the beginning.

  And then, seeing her run after her dog, panting and laughing and trying to look stern…that had just sent him over the edge.

  Yes, she was beautiful, but her personality made her even ten steps hotter.

  At least, that’s what he thought.

  Because as soon as she had opened her door earlier that night when he showed up at her house? Yeah, he had just about fallen to his knees in thanks.

  She wore tight black pants that didn’t really look like jeans, but he knew they were because of the seams. Over that, she had on this blousey thing that tucked in right at her hips and made her boobs look perfect. Not that he was staring at her chest. He did an excellent job of not doing that because he wasn’t a lecher. At least, mostly.

  Her cute feet were tucked into these little flats that just made her look adorable and yet sexy at the same time.

  He had thought a little black dress, fuck-me heels, and sexed-up hair was possibly the hottest thing in the world. But he was wrong. Arden in cute black jeans, a soft top, and adorable shoes was apparently what turned him on.

  Either he had reached an age where this was his new way to judge hotness, or, Arden was special.

  As she smiled at something he said, he had a feeling it was a mixture of both.

  It was all Arden.

  Because she was just so damn strong. No matter what she did, she was strong.

  He knew that she still had to be hurting, still had bad days—even though he didn’t know exactly what those days entailed or what made her hurt. But she was there with him, even when his head wasn’t totally in the game because of everything going on in his life.

  He reminded himself that this was only their first date. And Arden was simply a distraction. That’s what he needed. A step away from his worries, his thoughts, and frankly, his family.

  Arden was perfect for that. Maybe he could be a distraction for her, too, because he had a feeling she needed one.

  “So, shall I do the whole tell-me-about-yourself thing?” Liam asked, smiling. He shook his head and continued. “I’m really not as smooth as my brothers would have you believe if you met them. Okay, they would probably actually call me ‘pretty boy’ and other things, but I’m not going there.”

  Arden laughed, leaning forward over her plate. “My brothers pretty much think the same of me. Though they don’t call me ‘pretty boy.’”

  “Yeah, I probably shouldn’t have mentioned that. Ever. If we could just not use that name again, that would be great.”

  “I don’t know. I think if I shouted ‘pretty boy’ across the grocery store if I ever saw you there, it could be a thing. You could just endorse your checks like that and sign off your emails that way. We’d all know who we were talking to.”

  “I hate them. Seriously.”

  “You’re the one who brought it up.”

  “Just saying.”

  “Well, how about you tell me something about yourself?”

  “Like what?”

  “I don’t know. How did you get into your work?” He winced. “You don’t have to answer that. I hate answering how I knew I wanted to be a writer.”

  “Oh, how did you know you wanted to be a writer?” Arden asked, her eyes twinkling.

  “See, I keep opening myself up to these things.”

  “You really do. But I’ll answer the question if you do.”

  “Deal.”

  They stared at each other, then laughed.

  “I guess I should go first?” Liam asked, shaking his head.

  “Why not.”

  “I loved reading as a kid, and then I found myself hating it when I was in school because they kept making me read these books that weren’t really my cup of tea.”

  “Oh, I hated the required reading in school. I swear I never understood exactly what the teacher wanted me to learn. All that symbolism that really wasn’t. Was the author saying that the curtains were blue?”

  Liam continued. “Yeah, whenev
er I find myself describing the room that the character goes into and I’m actually worried about the color of the wallpaper, I know that I really need to push it out of my head and just get to the character’s motivation.”

  “Thank God.”

  “Anyway, I kind of quit reading for fun because I was forced into it. And while I was a teen, I was actually working on some modeling gigs. Not a lot, but enough. And then I was working full-time right out of high school. I took a couple of years off from school and didn’t go directly to college because I was making good money. And I liked it. Much to my parents’ dismay.”

  He held back a wince at that, not one to get into the whole who his parents were and what they meant to him thing. Because, frankly, he couldn’t even formulate words about what he was feeling, and this was just a first date. Only a distraction. He had to keep telling himself that. He didn’t need anything serious, not right then. Maybe not ever with the way that his mind was going.

  “I really need to Google your old modeling days.” She smiled as she said it. “As it is, you don’t have an author photo, which I think is very weird in this day and age.”

  Liam just shrugged. “It started off because I didn’t want people to remember me from my modeling days. Not that they would, but we know how Google is. And I don’t really go to a lot of signings, even though I should. Though with my next book, keeping those two worlds separate will be a moot point.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, I’m finally being forced to go on tour, something I’m a little worried about. But the last book hit the New York Times somehow. So, here we are.”

  “I remember when you hit. It was a big deal.”

  “Yeah, kind of a really big deal. It makes me happy, and a little scared at the same time. You know? The next step and all that? Anyway, my photo’s going to be slapped up on my website and on my social media that the publisher runs for me. So, that means people will figure out who I am and who I used to be if they want to Google things like that.”

  “And we like to Google things like that,” Arden agreed.

  “Great. But how did I start? Well, I got bored on set sometimes, and it wasn’t like I was old enough to really do anything. At least legally.”

  “I won’t ask. Don’t worry. Yet.”

  “Thank you for that reprieve. Anyway, I picked up a book that was sort of suspense, and sort of historical fiction all at the same time. I fell in love with it and needed to read the whole series, even though I started at book fourteen like an idiot.”

  “I hate when I accidentally start a series in the wrong place.”

  “It’s the worst. However, I did find the rest of the series and then found a bunch of other authors. And I just kept reading and reading. And then I went to college once I decided I didn’t want to model anymore. While I was there, even with the required reading, I just kept reading.”

  “What’s your degree in?”

  “Business Management and Business. Kind of general because I didn’t really know what I wanted to do. I took this creative writing class that I fell in love with, and I just kept going. One thing led to another, and in a drunken stupor, I decided that I was going to find an agent and see if it actually worked.”

  “A drunken stupor?” she asked, her brow raised.

  “Yeah, not really, but that’s how it felt. I was rejected I think eighteen times, but the nineteenth, they wanted to see a partial manuscript. And that’s who I stayed with. I’m very lucky, I know that. But…I like what I do.”

  “You’re lucky that you like what you do, but it’s not just luck that got you here. I’ve read your work, sometimes even before it’s published. You have talent, and you work hard. It’s not just luck.”

  “Thanks for that. Now, your turn to answer.”

  “Mine’s pretty simple. Or, really not. I got a Liberal Arts degree. Yes, I know, so helpful. But I also did a dual major with English. I wanted to be a teacher, and I wanted to work with kids and maybe even high school students, depending on where I was when I finished school. And I wanted to do what I loved. Deal with books. Because, like you, I hated reading what was required of me in school, but I still actually read on the side. I thought that maybe if I was that English teacher, I could help myself and other students love what the state required us to read. But it didn’t work out like that.”

  Liam frowned. “Why?”

  Arden played with the pasta on her plate, rolling a meatball around the edges.

  “I got sick. And that meant I couldn’t finish school when I wanted to. When I finally did, I didn’t have the energy to get my teaching certificate. I couldn’t get out of bed some days, and I couldn’t really be consistent. Nobody could rely on me. And it sucked.”

  Liam leaned forward and gripped her hand, giving it a squeeze. “I’m sorry. I won’t ask what happened, but I will ask…is it still going on?”

  She met his gaze and gave him a sad smile.

  “It’ll always be going on. I have lupus.”

  Liam blinked. “That’s an auto-immune disease, right?”

  “Yes, lupus is where my immune system pretty much becomes hyperactive and attacks my healthy tissue. It attacks everything it can. Kidneys, my blood, my skin, my joints, my heart, even my lungs. All of that is fair game. I have to deal with pancreas issues and liver issues. Lots of stomach issues. Some days, I just don’t have the energy to get out of bed. Some days, I feel like I’m doing great and, suddenly, I’ll crash in the middle of the day and not be able to do anything. Most of the time, I can focus and get things done as long as I don’t move around too much if I’m in the middle of a flare or move around too little if I’m not, but my eyes can give out, and everything hurts. All the time. So, yeah, lupus sucks. I had it when I was younger, and I’m going to have it for the rest of my life. And because of the nature of the disease, it comes with a whole host of other ailments and what they call sister-diseases. There are blood tests for lupus itself, but because of the medications they give you for the hundred different symptoms, it’s hard to diagnose because it causes false negatives. It just sucks.”

  Liam swallowed, trying to comprehend everything that she had been through even at her young age. What did one say to that? Did you tell the person they were strong? Because that just felt like a cop-out. Of course, Arden knew she was strong. She fought every day.

  So, he said the only thing that he could, something that was true.

  “I’m sorry. That sucks.”

  She snorted and smiled brightly, the expression actually reaching her eyes. “Yeah, that’s a good word for it. I hate it, but it’s my life now. The first time you met me? It was because the sun gave me a flare and I had a reaction to it. The sun. I was out with my brothers at an outdoor concert, and even though I was slathered in sunscreen and wore a hat, I still had a reaction. So, I needed to get an infusion to hydrate and calm my immune response. Everything hurt, and I had cramps all over my body. My joints felt like they were trying to fall off. But, that’s just life. And it sucks, like you said. But it’s life.” She shrugged, and he scooted his chair over just a bit more so he could wrap his arm around her shoulders.

  “Well, you’re still here.”

  “True.”

  “I have no idea what to say. I really suck at this. For a man who uses his words for a living, I don’t know what to say.”

  “There’s nothing to say. You’re not supposed to deal with anything like this, especially at my age. Or any age. But I do. And, because I do, and it took forever for us to actually diagnose it and determine that I couldn’t do what I wanted to do, I sort of fell into this job. At first, I was taking editing courses to get certified. I thought maybe I could become a freelancer and work that way. I still have the certification, but I got so busy with the other parts of my job that I haven’t actually done a lot of editing over the last couple of years. I met a publisher online, and we hit it off, and things just worked out for me. I created a whole business where I can work from my bed if I need to. Wh
ich is good. Because, sometimes, I just can’t get out of bed.” She sighed and played with her meatball again. “Probably not the best thing to tell you on a date. I mean, me talking about the fact that my body is trying to attack itself and sometimes I’m just too tired to get out of bed. Oh, so sexy, right?”

  She rolled her eyes, but Liam reached out and cupped her face. “I think you’re pretty damn sexy. I thought it earlier, about how I even found you attractive when you were in your hospital bed. And you’re even hotter now because I know who you are. At least, parts of you. I’m sorry you have to go through this, but I still see you as a woman, if that helps.”

  He winced. “I really suck at words.”

  Arden just smiled and leaned forward so her forehead rested against his. “You don’t. The fact that you just said you see me as a woman? Even when sometimes I feel like I’m just a decaying corpse? Yeah, I think I like that.”

  “Decaying corpse?” Liam asked, laughing.

  “What? Sometimes, I just have a bad day. Now, do you want this meatball? I could roll it towards you like Lady and the Tramp if you want.”

  That made Liam laugh. He shook his head. “You know, I was having Lady and the Tramp vibes the whole time we were eating that pasta.”

  “Yeah, but I still think I’m going to do the whole meatball thing. I’ll save it for Jasper, though. He was a good dog today.”

  “Sounds like a plan.”

  And then Liam leaned forward and barely brushed his lips over hers, just a soft caress. Because he could.

  She sucked in a breath, and he looked at her, keeping his eyes open as he pulled away.

  “What was that for?” she asked, her voice breathy.

  “Because I wanted to. Because…why not?”

  “Why not?” she repeated, her voice a whisper.

  It didn’t matter what was going on with him or even her. Sometimes, a person just needed a moment like this. A single second where they could be themselves—not their pasts or whatever might have brought them down.

  And Liam didn’t mind that. Not in the least.

  When they got back to Arden’s place, Liam wasn’t sure what would happen next. Then again, when it came to Arden and everything that had happened over the past few weeks with him, he never knew what was going to happen next.