by K. A. Linde
If you know…then why are you coming back? Stay with him!
I can’t. I know we didn’t predict this, but we also didn’t guess I’d lose my job. Plus, even though I care for him, I don’t even know if I trust him.
And that will get easier with a thousand miles between you?
No…
You’ve been given the opportunity of a lifetime. I love you to pieces, Nat, but this is stupid.
I didn’t respond. I didn’t know what to say.
I’d had all these reasons when I told Penn that I couldn’t stay. I wanted to be independent. We’d only known each other for a short time. I didn’t know if I could trust him with everything we’d gone through. We came from two different worlds. I still needed to figure myself out before I could figure us out. But as the call for boarding came through, I couldn’t seem to think of any of that. Just that I was leaving.
My phone dinged, and I realized that I’d ignored it. I had a half-dozen more messages from Amy that I ignored and opened Penn’s response to my question about home.
He’d sent a picture of us at the beach house that we’d taken one day while we were lounging around. I was in the infamous white dress that we’d first met in. He was in khaki shorts and a polo. I was laughing like a fool while he kissed my cheek and snapped the shot.
There was only one line beneath it.
Home.
I jumped out of my seat. “Oh my god, I’m an idiot.”
The woman next to me looked at me as if I were actually insane. But I ignored her, hauled my bag and purse up onto my shoulders, and ran back out of the terminal. I darted through the exit and back out onto the area for departures and arrivals.
I hailed the first taxi I could find and jumped into the backseat.
“Where to?” the driver asked.
“East Hampton.”
My breath was coming out in puffs from my sprint out of the airport, and my luggage was going to go to Charleston ahead of me, but I didn’t even care. The taxi was pulling away, and I was on my way to the beach house. Because I couldn’t leave. I couldn’t leave New York without telling Penn the truth. Without telling him how I really felt…that I loved him.
Penn
38
By this time, Natalie was probably on her flight, about to head home.
I’d actually let her slip through my fingers. Just like that, she was gone. She’d said that she still wanted to work on things. That we’d video chat and visit, but it wasn’t the same. And we both knew it. She had already started pulling away as soon as she said no. I didn’t want that good-bye at the airport to be enough, but I’d royally fucked up. And I was only going to make it worse when I told her about this insufferable bet.
Maybe we could salvage it. At least, I hoped that we could.
I’d figure it out after this damnable party.
A few hours here, and I might want to fly to Charleston tonight. I pulled into the driveway of the Kensington Cottage, as I had done over and over the last two months. It looked the same, and yet I knew that it was empty. She wasn’t in it.
Every inch of this place reminded me of her. I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to set foot inside without seeing her here. All the hours we’d spent together, writing, joking, brooding, fucking. This house now belonged to her in my mind.
I leashed Totle and then entered the house. Totle took off at a bound. He was so excited to be back. He looked around at all the strange people and seemed to be looking…for her.
“What are you doing with him at this party?” my mother accosted me.
“I couldn’t just leave him,” I told her flatly. “I’ll put him in a bedroom, and he’ll be fine for the evening.”
“I hope you’re going to behave at this event, Penn. This is important for my career.”
I leveled her with a blank gaze. “Sure. I’ll behave.”
Then I shouldered past her and went back to the master bedroom. It would be occupied later, but for now, it was where Totle was most familiar, so I’d leave him here. I shooed him inside and then closed the door behind him.
I couldn’t be this Penn anymore tonight. I had to be aloof, placating, devious even. I needed my Upper East Side mask. The one I wore to fit into these crowds that I’d once owned. And to care about the bullshit they spewed. To not embarrass my mother at this important event where nearly every politician in New York was in attendance. Even though that was all I wanted to do.
But I had been raised in this world. Slipping back into that skin was second nature. As easy as breathing.
Natalie wasn’t here, so nothing was real.
Not even me.
I strode around the room, shaking hands and kissing babies—metaphorically, of course. I charmed housewives and smirked at daughters. I did what was expected of me. What I’d always done. What I was good at. But there was nothing enjoyable about it. Not even the three glasses of bourbon I’d guzzled down to deal with these unbearable sycophants.
Three phone numbers, an offer to disappear down to the beach, and a suggested affair with the wife of a state senator, and I’d had enough. I tossed the numbers and reached for another drink.
“Ah, little brother is back in business,” Court said. He was leaning against the counter in the kitchen and smirking at me deviously.
I narrowed my eyes at him and didn’t respond. I just poured my drink and took a good, long sip.
“Where’s your new girlfriend?” he asked. “Thought she’d be making an appearance with you, or have you already blown through another one?”
“I really don’t want to discuss Natalie with you. Believe it or not.”
“Ah, Natalie! That was her name,” he said as if he’d just remembered. “She was smoking hot. Little angel. Was she a devil in bed?”
I ground my teeth and ignored the impulse in my brain telling me to beat the shit out of him. “Whatever, Court.”
Jane Devney strode into the kitchen then. She had on a nondescript blue dress and heels. Her ash-blonde hair was pulled up into a twist.
“Hello, pet,” Court crooned at her.
She smiled at him. “Ah, there you are. I was just talking to Senator Cumberland about that new initiative he’s working on in clean energy. But I just knew that I’d find you in here.”
He pulled her into his side and grinned down at her like a fool. My brother…a fool for love? I was imagining things. Jane was probably a means to an end or, at the very least, a short-term lay that he hadn’t dismissed yet.
“How do you deal with him?” I demanded.
Jane glanced back at me. “Hmm?”
“Ignore him,” Court said. “Just jealous.”
I snorted and raised my glass to them. “To the day that I’m jealous of my brother. May I be six feet under.”
Court’s eyes narrowed in warning, but I was already exiting the kitchen. Antagonizing Court was never a smart idea. He liked to push buttons. He didn’t like to be on the receiving end. Go figure.
I turned around and ran smack into another gorgeous, young blonde. But I realized that I recognized her.
“Anna English,” I said with a broad grin.
“Penn Kensington.”
Anna was Lark’s best friend from law school. She was a hundred percent LA, and it was obvious in this crowd of pale people in drab black garb. Thank god that there was someone here that I didn’t desperately need to avoid.
“Did Lark invite you?”
“Yes, I happened to be in town and could get away.”
“What are you doing again?”
“Celebrity publicity. Business is good.”
“That’s excellent. And you got married recently, right?”
She grinned. “Yes, over the summer. It was a small wedding.”
“Understandable when you marry a movie star like Josh Hutch.”
She laughed and waved her hand. “It’s no big deal. He’s just Josh around here. But anyway, it was nice playing catch-up, but I think Lark was looking for you. She said that
they were meeting in the library. I hope that means something to you.”
“Yeah, it does. Thanks for delivering the message.”
“Anytime. Just going to go find some more booze,” she said, raising her empty glass and striding into the kitchen where I’d just left my brother. Good luck to her.
I extracted myself from the party and headed down to the library. No wonder I hadn’t seen any of my friends floating around. They must have been holed up in here the entire time. Not that I was particularly looking forward to this conversation. But I knew what was coming.
And I entered at my own risk.
Katherine was lying out on the chaise by the window with her long, lean legs bare as her dress fell off the side. She looked arranged, like a portrait. Lewis had his nose buried in a book he’d probably grabbed off of one of the shelves. Rowe was seated behind the desk, staring intensely at the computer. It was Lark who looked up first from her spot near the entrance.
“Hey, you made it,” she said.
“I’ve been here awhile. I just didn’t know you were all back here.”
“I’m sorry about…not being able to help, you know?”
I held up my hand. “Not your fault. Don’t even worry about it. How are you and Thomas?”
She chewed on her lip. “Well, he couldn’t make it today. He got called into the office. I was going to head over after this. I think things will be okay.”
“Good.”
“Can we move on to the main course?” Katherine trilled from her seat. She lifted her arms overhead, stretching her body out long and invitingly.
Lewis snapped his book shut and looked up at me. We hadn’t spoken since that day. I hadn’t told Natalie about the bet, and I could hardly look at him, knowing he had feelings for her, too.
“So, where is she?” Lewis asked testily.
“She’s not here,” I said.
Katherine’s laugh started out as a titter, small and breathy, and then turned into an almost maniacal cackle. “She isn’t even…here?”
“No, she left. She’s on a plane right now back to Charleston.”
Lark frowned. “Oh Penn, I’m so sorry. I know how you feel about her.”
“Well, that settles it, doesn’t it?” Katherine said. She tilted her head to the ceiling, grinning like a Cheshire cat. “I win.”
“She fell for me. That was the bet,” I spat.
“No, the bet was that you bring her here, and then we get an impartial judge to say whether or not she really fell for you.” Katherine kicked both of her feet off of the chaise and stood. “She’s not here. No one can judge. You. Lose.”
I opened my mouth and then closed it. She was right. Damn it. Natalie had to be here for me to win. “But you told her about the bet. That was against the rules.”
“Actually, there weren’t any rules. If you wanted them, you should have stipulated,” she purred.
“And didn’t you tell her anyway?” Lewis asked.
“No,” I said through gritted teeth. “There was so much going on, and she’d just lost everything. I didn’t want to break this to her too. She was already leaving to go home. I’m going to tell her, just…not the day she lost her livelihood.”
“Pathetic,” Lewis grumbled. He stuffed the book he’d been reading back into its place. “You couldn’t even do that right.”
“Look, that’s none of your fucking business.”
“What is going on with you two?” Lark asked.
“Do you want to tell them, Lewis?”
Lewis glared at me. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Well, I’m intrigued,” Katherine said. “Did you two get into a little spat?”
I was prepared to spill his secret. But as I looked at his pleading eyes, at my very best friend, the guy that I’d grown up with my entire life, I couldn’t do that to him. Even if he could do it to me.
“No,” I yielded. “He just gave me some good advice that I didn’t take. He’s right to be pissed at me.”
Lewis’s eyes widened, as if he couldn’t believe I hadn’t ratted out his feelings for Natalie. But even I wasn’t cruel enough to spill that to the likes of Katherine.
“Truthfully, I’m a little disappointed in you, Penn,” Katherine said. She glided unhurriedly in my direction. “I was expecting a harder challenge. I thought you’d show me the dark Upper East Side of your nature. That bad boy underneath that you keep trying to push away with stuffy lectures about right and wrong.”
“That Penn is dead,” I told her.
“Everyone in this room knows that’s a lie. You’re still there. Hiding down deep. I’ll claw it out of you.” She trailed her finger down my chest. “All night tonight.”
I swatted her hand away. “Enough.”
“You guys,” Lark said, glancing anxiously between us. “Maybe we should drop the whole thing. It was stupid anyway.”
“It didn’t happen how either of you expected,” Lewis chimed in. “And all it does is hurt the group.”
Everyone jumped in at once to argue their point of all of this. If only we had been this thoughtful two months ago in the pool.
“The bet was set,” Katherine yelled over everyone. “If you’d won, I would have married Camden. No complaints from me.”
“Yeah, right,” I spat.
“I won, so I get to fuck you.” Katherine shrugged. “That’s the bet. That’s what I get for going darker than you, Penn. Maybe, next time, you’ll really play.”
“You bitch…”
“Enough!” Rowe roared, shocking us all into silence. “The bet happened. We all agreed on it that night. You can’t argue your way out of this, so stop trying. I’m fucking tired of it. Natalie isn’t here, so we can’t judge if she fell for you. So, by the rules, Katherine won. Can we all shut up now and move on?”
Natalie
39
The cab ride took forever and cost a fortune.
But I didn’t even care as I bounded up the stairs and into the mayor’s party. It was packed full of politicians and their friends. All dressed the same, as if they were going to a funeral. And here I was in a white dress and sandals with my hair in a topknot. No makeup. And nothing but my one bag and purse to my name. I probably looked like a hobo who had wandered into their midst.
Luckily, the mayor was nowhere around. I excused myself at the door and hurried through the living room. It was really beautiful, the way the interior decorator had finished everything. Not that that was my mission here.
I needed to find Penn. I had to tell him the truth.
I stumbled into the kitchen, keeping my eye out for him. I saw a man I recognized. I took a deep breath and then pushed forward.
“Court?” I asked.
He glanced over at me and frowned. “Are you lost, love?”
“I’m Natalie. We met briefly on Halloween. Have you seen Penn?”
“Oh right. Penn’s little girlfriend. And here I thought, he’d ditched you.”
“Uh, no. But have you seen him?”
“He was harassing me earlier.”
I nearly rolled my eyes but held it back. “Do you know where he went?”
“Think he ran toward the library. But don’t hold me to it. When he ditches you later, feel free to look me up.” He winked.
I shook my head in disgust and pushed past him. He seemed every bit as dastardly as Penn had described him. Especially since I was pretty sure that his own girlfriend had been standing only a few feet away when he hit on me. Charming.
The library was around the corner and down closer to the master bedroom. I knew the layout by heart and rushed to open the door. My hand was on it when I heard raised voices from the other side.
I froze for a second. Who was yelling? And what about? Maybe Penn wasn’t in there at all, and Court was sending me into some kind of trap. I’d walk in on someone having sex or in the middle of a huge argument and make a fool of myself. I released my hold on the doorknob and then pressed my ear to the door. Better find out before I ma
ke something worse.
“The bet was set!”
I furrowed my brows at those words. That was definitely Katherine. Who was she yelling at?
She continued, “If you’d won, I would have married Camden. No complaints from me.”
My eyes bulged. Married Camden? No one thought Katherine would actually do that. It was a stupid, arranged thing that she hoped to put off long enough to find someone better.
Then someone said something too low for me to hear.
“I won, so I get to fuck you.”
My stomach turned at that. Oh god, I had a feeling I knew who she was talking to. No, no, no.
“That’s the bet. That’s what I get for going darker than you, Penn. Maybe, next time, you’ll really play.”
My stomach dropped even further. Penn. She was…definitely talking to Penn. The bet was real. The bet Katherine had warned me about was true. And the terms…that was what Katherine had been spewing. Marry Camden or fuck Penn.
“Enough!” Rowe roared. “The bet happened. We all agreed on it that night. You can’t argue your way out of this, so stop trying. I’m fucking tired of it. Natalie isn’t here, so we can’t judge if she fell for you. So, by the rules, Katherine won. Can we all shut up now and move on?”
I didn’t think.
Didn’t take time to process.
Didn’t control the initial impulse that raced through my body.
Just thrust the library door open and strode into the room. “Wow, so the bet was real.”
Five sets of eyes turned to me all at once. Katherine’s jaw dropped open. Lewis took a step toward me. Lark covered her mouth in shock. Rowe actually looked surprised. But it was Penn. It was Penn that I stared at. Who looked both shocked and overjoyed. Like he wanted to wrap his arms around me and demand to know what I was doing here. Kiss the breath out of me and get me away from this horrible moment.
“Natalie, what are you doing here?” Penn asked. He brushed past Katherine and moved toward me.