by Mandy Magro
‘You probably won’t believe me but I’ve thought about this a lot in the past couple of weeks. I just can’t get my head around the fact that last month I was a free agent and then this month I’m a father. I’m afraid of not living up to society’s expectations of what a father should be. I don’t want to have a life with white picket fences and a family sedan. Hell, I don’t even want to get married.’ Mark shuffled his feet along the floor and took a deep breath, exhaling slowly as he rubbed his temples. ‘When she’s old enough to take care of herself I can see myself being in her life, but for now, I just can’t do it, Molly. I’m sorry but I’d rather be brutally honest now than try to be part of Rose’s life, only to hurt her. Like I said, I truly think she’s better off without me.’
Molly stood up, giving him a look of absolute pity, and then walked away. She was utterly drained and had nothing more to say. He wasn’t worth speaking to any more anyway. She couldn’t force him into Rose’s life. He was right, he would just end up hurting Rose, and that was the last thing she wanted. She wondered if he would regret this one day. When he was old and grey, when his looks had faded and his charm tarnished, when he had no family to share his life with, maybe he would look back on this day and realise that he had made the biggest mistake of his life.
Chapter 17
A march fly latched painfully onto Molly’s arm as she laid it out with one hard slap, wiping away the spot of blood it had left with the cuff of her shirt. She smiled as she watched Kenny, Heath and Trev get dressed in their beekeeping garb, white suits with elasticised ankle and wrist cuffs plus gloves, veils and hats. They looked like mad scientists out of some science fiction movie.
Molly had been sure to wash the outfits twice before the men put them on. Any stings that were retained in the suits from last time would continue to send out an alarm pheromone that caused aggressive behaviour in the bees, often provoking a stinging frenzy. Molly had also learnt from her beekeeping course that most of the bees were females – and well, like most females, you didn’t want to give them a reason to defend their home and families. The females were the ones that did all the hard work and collected all the pollen, so they were very protective of their hives.
Kenny was extra nervous about having to move the hives as he had been attacked by the bees once before and was forever haunted by the memory. Molly had insisted that he not help today, seeing as he was so worked up about it, but he was determined to get over his fear of bees, saying the only way he could do that was to go out and have a face-off with them.
They had to move the bees every so often, depending on what part of the farm they wanted the bees to pollinate. The insects were a very important part of fruit farming and most farmers had hives scattered around their properties. It increased the yield of the fruit, which helped put more money in the farmers’ pockets. The added bonus was the fresh honey, which had a hint of mango flavour in it from the bees visiting all the mango flowers. Molly and Rose loved it drizzled over ice-cream for a sweet treat. It was heavenly.
Trev, Kenny and Skip jumped up in the back of the Land Cruiser and Heath slid into the front with Molly. She felt a shiver course through her entire body as his hand brushed hers. Molly knew he must have felt it too, as he looked over at her and smiled playfully. They had been flirting with each other since they’d come back from Ironbark Station, the atmosphere between them intense, the pair of them teasing each other to the brink. She had taken everyone’s advice on board – Aunty Cheryl’s, Jade’s and Alice’s, and the fact that all three women believed it was okay for her to fall in love with Heath was starting to sit well with her. It was exciting, and she was enjoying the playful seduction, the secret fleeting looks that she and Heath would share throughout the day and the way they would deliberately brush past each other.
She started the engine and headed towards the back of the property where the hives were presently being kept. She had mowed the area nearest the dam earlier that morning so the bees’ new home, three kilometres away, was ready to go. It was very important to make sure the hives were close to water so they had plenty to drink. Another vital point was to make sure the hives were moved more than two kilometres from their previous location, or the bees would go back to where their home used to be. Bees orient to their hives by physical landmarks, not by some extraordinary radar. Even though Molly was allergic to bees she loved keeping them on the property, and found their way of life fascinating.
As she drove down the paddock Molly glanced over towards Heath. He was the perfect example of a real man, rugged and strong – such a contrast to Mark. And Heath was so loving and unselfish, whereas all Mark thought about was himself. A selfish person could never love another, she contemplated.
With that simple but influential comparison, Molly found her thoughts wandering back to the last time she had seen Mark. It had been almost a month since that awful morning on the verandah, and she had not heard a word from him since. It was like he didn’t even exist, and in a way she was happy about that. Rose was certainly none the wiser, getting on with her life like any normal six-year-old girl, with a perpetual smile on her face and a passion for life. For the first time, Molly began to understand that Rose had all she needed in life just as she was, and that she didn’t need her real father. The fact that Mark would probably break Rose’s heart made her even more determined to keep him away from her. She decided to tell Rose about him only once she was old enough to understand it all. Molly no longer carried around the guilt and shame of not knowing the father of her daughter – that chapter in her life was closed, and it felt damn good. She smiled softly as she remembered how worried Heath had been when she told him what Mark had said to her that day down by the dam, and the way Heath had held her close, she had felt so secure in his arms, as though nothing could hurt her, as though his love alone would protect her.
‘Shit, Molly! Watch out!’ Heath hollered as Molly caught a glimpse of a kangaroo the size of a boulder bounding directly into her path. She didn’t want to slam the brakes on as that would send Trev, Kenny and Skip hurtling off the back so instead she swerved in between two mango trees, wincing as she heard the branches engraving deep grooves into her beloved Land Cruiser. Not that the Cruiser didn’t have its fair share of scratches and dints already.
‘You blokes okay up the back?’ Molly called out as they came to a standstill, the terrified kangaroo bounding out of sight.
‘Yeah, mate. Bugger me dead, that was one of the biggest roos I’ve ever seen!’ Trev called back.
‘It looked as though it’d been taking steroids,’ Heath said, chuckling.
‘I’m jealous. I’d love to have muscles as big as that roo’s. Then the chicks would really dig me!’ Kenny laughed.
‘It’s better to have a woman that loves you for your mind, not for your muscles, Kenny!’ Molly called back, giggling, as she reversed back into the mango drill and towards the beehives.
Dusk was looming as they arrived at the hives and Molly sat safely inside her Land Cruiser with Skip, watching the men at work. It was a perfect time of the day to be moving hives as dusk was when the bees shut up shop and moved indoors for the night. Occasionally, a few rogues would still be hanging around the outside so you just had to be careful not to disturb them.
She’d have loved to have been out there with them in a crazy suit herself, but she had spent a night in a Cairns private hospital when her face had puffed up to the size of a watermelon after a bee sting. Her lips had been so swollen it looked as though she had overdosed on Botox. She chuckled to herself. It was funny now, but at the time it had been quite scary. She’d been out helping David move some of the hives when wham! A bee had gotten into her suit somehow and stung her right on the face. Within a minute she began to feel her face swell. Heath, Trev and Kenny had struggled to keep straight faces when they had first walked into the hospital room, letting their laughter rip as soon as Molly told them to stop acting like it was a life-or-death situation. She had copped it from them for weeks afte
rwards, but it was all in good fun and she didn’t mind having a good laugh at her own expense.
Trev gave a few short raps on the roof once he, Heath and Kenny were all up safely on the back of the Cruiser, letting her know they were good to go. Molly started the engine, driving very slowly, cringing every time she couldn’t avoid a bump in the dirt track, constantly checking her rear-vision mirror to make sure the hives were still inactive and the men weren’t getting stung.
Skip sat beside her, panting heavily, causing the windscreen to fog up. ‘Are you right there, buddy? Stop breathing so hard! I can’t see three metres in front of me.’
Skip just looked at her and barked. She rolled her eyes at him and switched the air-conditioner on full bore with the vents pointing towards the windscreen. The fog cleared up in seconds as Molly enjoyed the cool breeze blowing around her face, feeling a bit guilty that the men were stuck on the back, sweltering in their protective suits in the heat. They had to be cooking out there.
When they finally arrived at the spot she had chosen the men carefully lifted the hives off the back of the Land Cruiser and carried them over to the metal stand Molly had made up for them. They were moving in slow motion, trying their best not to get stung. And then, just as they placed the last hive down on the stand, it happened. Kenny squealed shrilly, running like a bat out of hell towards the dam, slapping at his crutch like a lunatic. The act in itself looked mighty painful and Molly grimaced as she watched him hit the water with a massive splash, a gigantic spray of water swallowing him up for a few seconds. Perhaps a bee had somehow gotten into his suit. She wound down the window to check. ‘Is he all right, guys?’
Heath and Trev were laughing so hard they found it impossible to answer, instead choosing to wave their hands in the air as if to say he was fine. Molly found their laughter contagious and burst out laughing herself just as Kenny emerged from the water, resembling a swamp monster rising from the depths of the muddy floor below. He was dripping with mucky water, his suit clinging to him like glue, lily-pad tentacles wrapped all around him. He was having trouble walking now that the suit was weighed down with water and he took big, long steps as he made his way back towards them. He looked like a half-drowned Neil Armstrong attempting to walk on the moon. Molly was breathless with laughter.
‘A bloody bee stung me fair on the scruffies! I don’t know how the hell it got in there but it went straight for the family jewels and it hurt like nothing’s ever hurt before! I reckon they’re going to swell to the size of small rockmelons,’ Kenny shouted, shuffling painfully from foot to foot while holding onto his groin for dear life. ‘It feels as though some bastard’s dropped a match down my jocks and my pubes are on fire.’
‘Ouch. Bloody hell, mate. That’s got to hurt, big time,’ Heath said. ‘I’d offer to pluck the stinger out but I ain’t going anywhere near your hairy balls. I don’t care how much of a great mate you are.’
‘You put on quite a show there, Kenny. I nearly wet my dacks!’ Trev added, wiping away the tears that were running down his face.
‘Tell me about it,’ Molly said, still chuckling.
‘Great mates you lot are!’ Kenny said, a smirk forming. ‘Now get me home so I can put some ice on my balls before they explode. I can feel them swelling even more as we speak.’
‘Oh, going visual, Kenny. Not a pretty sight,’ Molly replied with a look of mock horror spreading over her face.
‘Oh, ha-di-ha-ha!’ Kenny said, his face creasing up.
Molly found herself smiling all the whole way back to the workers’ cottage. She felt so free, so alive, and so happy. The world needed more laughter in it, and more love, she thought, peeking over at Heath.
Chapter 18
Skip began to bark insistently as Molly pulled on her rhinestone Ariat boots and hopped about madly on one leg. She heard a toot out the front of the house. She quickly brushed her long dark hair and took one last look in the mirror, applying soft-pink lip gloss as she ran down the hall and out onto the verandah, making sure to lock the door securely behind her – everyone else was already at the rodeo. Heath and the guys had left early that morning as he was riding in the bull comp and needed to be there to prepare.
She couldn’t wait to see him in the centre ring. He knew how to give it his all and boy, he looked good in his chaps, spurs, boots and cowboy hat. It was enough to drive a woman wild. Not that she needed that to drive her wild. She was finding Heath harder and harder to resist, and her need to keep her emotional distance from him was no longer consuming her. She had come to accept that Jenny would approve of her and Heath getting together. Why wouldn’t she? Jenny had known that Molly didn’t look at love lightly; it was something she took very seriously. If Jenny was looking down on them, which Molly liked to believe she was, she would know that Molly would take care of Heath, and that she would love him unconditionally.
It had been two months since she had last seen Mark and in that time she had accepted that it would have never worked between them anyway. They were way too different. Mark had no direction, no concern for anyone else other than himself, and was only after one thing when it came to women. Molly found that extremely unattractive. He had taught her one very important thing, though: just how deeply she wanted to be in love, to have a brother or sister for Rose, to find her knight in shining armour. It was time for her to acknowledge her dream and to not let anything or anyone stand in the way. Maybe Cheryl had been right. Maybe the love of her life had found her a long time ago and she had just been too blind to see it.
She smiled as she heard the country tunes blaring from Jade’s car stereo, her belly fluttering with anticipation at the night ahead. Jade had offered to drive to the Chillagoe rodeo this year as Molly had driven last year. They always took turns. Melinda waved cheerfully from the passenger-side window of the Toyota Hilux and Molly waved enthusiastically back. She sternly told Skip to stay put on the verandah, reminding him that he was the king of the castle for now and he had to take care of Jacaranda Farm. His ears drooped as he sat down on his rug, clearly miserable at being left behind. Molly leant down and gave him a loving scratch on the head and he instantly cheered up, his tail making tapping sounds on the timber floorboards as he fervently wagged it.
Grabbing her swag from beside the door, Molly ran down the steps and out to the girls, keen to hit the road. She was looking forward to taking Rose on some of the rides this afternoon, especially the dodgem cars; they always had a blast. David and Elizabeth had taken Rose with them before lunch so they could watch the wood-chopping competition. Molly wished she could have gone with them, but she’d had to work on one of the neighbour’s horses.
‘Hey there, Molly. Are you ready for a great night?’ Jade screamed over the music, grinning madly.
‘This cowgirl is up for anything! Giddy up!’ Molly replied as she slid in beside Melinda.
‘Well, in that case, tonight is going to be full of fun!’
‘Yeehaaaa!’ Molly hollered out the window as they drove off in a cloud of red dust. She chuckled as she caught a glimpse of Skip on the verandah, his head cocked to the side, looking at the three of them as if they were bonkers.
Jade ended up having to park half a kilometre from the rodeo entrance, under the shade of a big old Queensland waratah tree. There were four-wheel drives and utes lined up as far as the eye could see and Molly guessed there were more people at the rodeo than actually lived in Chillagoe. But, like themselves, a heck of a lot of rodeo lovers made their way to the little country town on the fringe of the vast Australian outback for its biggest night of the year. The Chillagoe rodeo was quite famous in its own right amongst rural and city dwellers alike. It wasn’t at all like the big Mareeba rodeo, which Molly also loved with a passion; it was more of a family bush rodeo where you could sit much closer to the fast-paced action than you were able to in the grandstands at the Mareeba rodeo grounds. The riders were that close you could basically smell their adrenaline, making you feel more a part of the action.
‘Oh yum, I can smell loads of gastronomical delights!’ Molly pronounced as she stepped out of the Hilux, sniffing the air exaggeratedly.
‘Yeah, my mouth is watering just thinking about devouring a huge plate of those spare ribs dripping in gooey hickory sauce,’ Jade said hungrily as she wrapped her arm around Molly’s shoulder.
‘I’m grabbing myself a dagwood dog covered in tomato sauce and then I’m going to top it off with a waffle with lashings of whipped cream!’ Molly declared, licking her lips.
‘I’m not going on any rides with you two after all that food,’ Melinda said, laughing.
Jade unhooked her arm from Molly’s and gave Melinda a quick hug. ‘Give me an hour for the food to settle and we’ll be hooning around in the dodgem cars with no worries, Mel!’
They made their way down the road, towards the scores of sounds and smells emanating from the rodeo grounds. A man’s twangy voice was booming over a microphone, country music floated all around them, crowds were cheering, children were screaming with excitement and the smell of cattle and horses wafted delightfully in the air.
‘Hey, Jade, remember last year when they had to cancel the night’s events because termites had chewed through the lighting poles and they’d fallen over?’ Molly said, the memory making her smile.
‘Are you serious?’ Melinda asked.
Jade laughed. ‘Oh, I’d forgotten! Only in the bush could something like that happen.’
They joined the long line of people waiting to pay their entrance fee. Molly pulled out her mobile and dialled her grand-dad’s number.
‘Hello, love.’ David’s voice was hard to hear over the sounds of people clapping and cheering around him.
‘Hi, Granddad. Whereabouts are you guys?’