The thought of seeing Trevor that next morning had frightened her and she didn’t know why. He’d seen her at her most vulnerable state. Maybe he’d been so kind because he’d pitied her. She neither wanted nor needed for him to feel sorry for her.
Panzi shook herself mentally. She had to stop thinking about Trevor and come to terms with her great aunt’s death. That really would take every ounce of her strength to do. She went to the closet and pulled out a dark suit for the somber occasion.
* * *
Gertrude Crumity had been well known in the community. Many people showed up to pay their last respects. They hugged Panzina and offered their condolences.
Panzina, so grief stricken and emotional, she felt dazed. She was barely aware of each person as they embraced her and whispered kind words of encouragement in her ear. And she didn’t see Trevor Grant in the background. When he noticed her standing near the burial site, she looked so utterly sad that he automatically wanted to offer her comfort. But he didn’t move. He didn’t file into line with the rest of the grieving masses. He could see that she didn’t need him. She hadn’t called him and invited him to the services, and it seemed that she had any number of friends and family to care for her now. She didn’t need him to hold her up and raise her spirits. She’d made that obvious by the way she’d disappeared from his life.
When he’d rushed home at lunch to find Panzina gone he’d been terribly disappointed. He had expected a call from her or some indication of gratitude but the hours had turned into days and he hadn’t heard anything. Finally, he had decided that the best thing to do was forget Miss Panzina Wilson and allow her time to heal. Hadn’t she easily written him off without as much as a thank you?
He watched people he assumed were friends of her late aunt patting Panzina and embracing her. She’d be okay. She had an inner strength that she hadn’t yet recognized. It would get her through the days ahead. He wished that he could be of some support but he wouldn’t interfere in her life again. Hadn’t he learned anything from the last time?
A crowd gathered around Panzina and blocked her from his view. It served him right. He shouldn’t have come to the funeral anyway. He had no business infringing on her right to mourn. If anyone knew this, it should be him. There were times when he just wanted to be left alone to mourn in private. There’s a certain part of the mourning process that must be completed in solitaire. With this thought, he headed out of the church but not before looking back one last time.
Two weeks passed. With her aunt’s funeral behind her, Panzina thought the pain would lessen. Yet, things got no better. She found herself just going through the motions of living. Not even the colorful flowers she’d placed throughout the house could bring her out of her mannequin like state. They were the floral arrangements used at her aunt’s funeral. Some kind soul had loaded them into a van and brought them to her home. As the ladies from the community brought dish after dish of food for the reception, others placed the bouquets of roses, chrysanthemums, and carnations around her home. They hadn’t cheered her a bit. She missed her aunt desperately and had no one to talk to about it. She didn’t want to bother Gina with her grief. Gina had her own life to straighten out. She had called Telvin on several different occasions, but he was either too busy studying or out with his friends. He hadn’t shown up at the funeral, but that didn’t surprise her. Telvin hadn’t even checked on TJ to see how Aunt Gertie’s death had affected him. Panzina knew that the child had to be experiencing the loss because Aunt Gertie had been like a surrogate grandmother to him.
Panzina had begun to feel that her burdens were hers alone. It was evident in his awkward manner that Telvin had been behaving that he couldn’t deal with anything that even remotely touched on emotions.
She let her mind drift to Trevor Grant. The two men were like night and day. Why had he helped her when he’d found her crying in the parking lot of the nursing home? Since that day she’d left without thanking him, she’d wanted to somehow let him know the depth of her gratitude. Several times she picked up the phone only to return it back to its cradle without dialing his number. How can she thank someone for reaching out to her like he did when he wasn’t even family and barely knew her?
Panzina mechanically went from room to room watering the plants for the sole purpose of having something to do. As she cracked the Venetian blinds to allow sunlight to touch the plants, she saw the mailman approach the house. It hit her for the first time that she was now totally responsible for all of her aunt’s past finances. She would have to handle things concerning the house, such as bills, and anything involving the business. She realized this with a jolt as she went to retrieve the mail.
Her intuition struck again and she found herself the victim of her own morbid thoughts. She reread the letter over and over. It concerned L’ Fragrance, which she now owned. When she’d seen the large manila envelope stamped with the red letters CONFIDENTIAL it had alerted her that something was wrong. She soon found out what and it didn’t sound too good.
It seemed that her aunt had failed to re-pay the bank and now they demanded the full amount or L’ Fragrance would be foreclosed.
Panzina had felt a sense of pride upon learning a week before that her aunt had left her the house, the flower boutique, as well as a substantial amount of money. What she hadn’t counted on were these large hospital and nursing home bills. The excellent care her grandmother had received at the home was worth every penny, but it would eat up Panzina’s entire inheritance and then some.
Her hand trembled as she read the letter again. She didn’t know what to do. The sizeable amount of cash left to her wouldn’t nearly pay the outstanding debt her aunt had left behind. She would have to borrow against the flower shop or sell it to clear Aunt Gertie’s debts. Her dreams, her whole world, had come crashing down around her because of one letter.
* * *
Trevor didn’t know why he wasn’t going his usual route. Instead, he found himself driving towards a particular downtown flower boutique. As he thought about what he would say, it dawned on him that Panzina might not want to see him. It had been over a month and she hadn’t tried to contact him at all. He should just leave it at that and forget the woman. Instead, he was driving out of his way just to get a glimpse of her. Surely, he had to be going mad.
He saw the big ‘for sale’ sign in the window of L’Fragrance straight away. His heart dropped because Panzina obviously wasn’t inside the shop. He encountered tightly drawn drapes and a securely locked door. He hadn’t anticipated the disappointment he felt at this latest turn in Panzina’s life. Like a wilted flower he returned to his car and headed for home.
* * *
Panzina could feel the depression settle over her like a dark cloud and tried unsuccessfully to shake it. Putting L’ Fragrance up for sale had been the hardest decision she’d ever had to make. Once again, it had been a decision she’d made alone. Telvin had been away all week and could not be reached. It had been either the flower shop or the house, and she couldn’t very well live in a flower boutique, though she had considered it. The deciding factor had been the law that didn’t allow shopkeepers to live above or behind their shops in downtown. Had her shop been located in the country, she might not have had a problem.
Somehow, she felt as though she’d failed her aunt. Aunt Gertie had struggled for years to keep L’ Fragrance up and running. It had started as a dream. After much hard work and dedication, Aunt Gertie had been successful in managing the lucrative business. She’d given it her all. Now the dream had slowly wilted. Panzina prayed that the new owner would keep her on as an employee. She could very well end up in the unemployment line with the rest of the jobless.
That would really frazzle Telvin. He always harped about security and having a foundation on which to build their lives together. If the foundation, Panzina’s shop, was gone, it would be easier for him to back out of the commitment he’d made six months before he’d decided to go off to college.
Once aga
in, as she’d done so often in the past few weeks, Panzina began to wonder what type of marriage she and Telvin would have. He didn’t seem to be aware of what was important in life. Maybe he wasn’t mature enough for marriage just yet. He would definitely have to straighten his priorities out before they walked down any aisle together.
Sighing inwardly Panzina made her way to her aunt’s room. It had been over a month since the funeral and she still hadn’t packed Aunt Gertie’s belongings. She considered postponing it until the next day but decided against that. No matter how many days passed, the pain wouldn’t be any less.
Going through her aunt’s closet was no easy task. Her aunt had been sixty-eight years old and it seemed as though she had at least that many years of clothes, shoes, hats, and belts accumulated and stored in her closet. Not to mention the scarves, coats, and numerous other items.
At least an hour had passed when Panzina heard the doorbell chime. Brushing her dusty hands on her worn, faded jeans, she went to answer. She figured it would be someone stopping by to offer condolences. Loved ones still trickled in as they heard the news, and there were a lot of out-of-town friends and family that hadn’t been able to make the funeral. It completely stunned her to see Trevor Grant standing on her doorstep.
“Mr. Grant-” she began, but he silenced her with a cold stare.
“I came by for business purposes,” he stated. She stared at him blankly, speechless. “Well, are you going to invite me in or not?” he asked after she continued to stare as though dumbfounded.
“Oh. I-I’m sorry,” she stammered, snapping to her senses. “P- please come inside. Mr. Grant-” she started again. “I know I shouldn’t have left in such a hurry that day. I was-”
“You don’t have to justify yourself to me, Miss Wilson.” His icy eyes sliced through her. “No need to dwell on past issues. As I’ve said, I’m here on business.” His eyes took in her disheveled appearance and she shifted uncomfortably. He sensed that he always managed to unnerve her.
“I was getting some of my aunt’s things together,” she offered as an explanation. “You really caught me at a bad time.”
She remembered how caring he had been in her time of distress and dropped her head in shame. How she wished now that she had thanked him, but she hadn’t known how. She still didn’t know how. “Mr. Grant-”
“Trevor. Please.” He spotted the dark smudges beneath her eyes and felt a pang of guilt. The girl’s aunt had just passed. He should at least be a bit more sympathetic. He’d experienced the death of a loved one and knew how tolling it could be on ones emotions.
“Are you okay?” he asked more gently. “How are you holding up?”
“Fine,” she offered a quiet reply. Even though she looked anything but fine, he didn’t press the issue.
Trevor’s body seemed to fill the small room and Panzina couldn’t help but notice that he wore a form fitting Nike jogging suit. She had never seen him dressed so casually. Her breath caught in her throat as she took in his muscled thighs. Her eyes leaped to his face then dropped again as she saw the knowing look in his gaze. She couldn’t deny his magnetism.
“Can I get you something to drink?” she asked to break the silence.
“Sure.”
“Lemonade? Iced tea? A Coke?”
“What? No hard liquor?”
“No. My aunt never drank and I- ” She saw the smile on his face and realized that he had been attempting to joke and offer a roundabout apology for his rude entrance. She felt extremely foolish. She hurried to the kitchen.
“I’ll have iced tea,” he said softly from behind her and she jumped. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”
She hadn’t known that he had followed her to the kitchen. Again, she felt stupid for not waiting on his reply as to what beverage he’d have. With shaking hands, she poured the tea into a glass.
“Here you are.”
As she placed the drink in his hand their fingers brushed. She felt a current of electricity. She jerked back as if shocked, and some of the liquid spilled from the glass. Trevor’s gaze held hers. Had he felt the same thing as she? She knew he had.
Panzina quickly turned away and grabbed a sponge. She cleaned up the spilled tea from the tiled floor. Once finished, she cleared her throat, which had suddenly grown dry. Not trusting her voice, she swallowed a few times before speaking.
“You said you were here to discuss business. What exactly do you mean?” she asked.
“You are the owner of L’ Fragrance Flower Shop, are you not?” he asked.
“Yes, I am.” Her brows furrowed questioningly. “I told you that the day we first met, but you refused to believe me.”
“I’m sorry I acted like a typical male. I believe you now, and I’m considering buying the place. Have you had many offers?”
“Well, actually, no. I haven’t had any offers at all,” she admitted. “It’s only been for sale a short while.” She stared at him, confused. “What would you want with a flower boutique? It’s not your usual line of business,” she added.
“Maybe I like beautiful things,” was his low response. His hazel eyes strayed to her lips. “Yes, that’s the reason. I like beautiful things.”
He picked up his glass of tea. Panzina watched as his mouth rested on the rim of the glass. She really must get rid of the man. He was doing strange things to her and she wasn’t sure if she liked it. She was even more afraid that she did like it!
He sensed her hesitation and knew that he’d probably said the wrong thing at the wrong time.
Don’t push her away, in inner voice warned. “Maybe we can talk about this further over dinner?” he suggested, quickly.
“Well, sure. I don’t see why not,” she replied.
“I’ll pick you up at say, six thirty?”
“That’ll be fine.”
“Thank you for the tea, Panzina,” he said softly. “I’ll let you get back to cleaning out your aunt’s things. See you at six thirty.”
After Trevor had gone, Panzina tried to figure out why he unnerved her so. She wasn’t usually a tongue-tied, clumsy idiot around men, no matter how good looking they were. She’d run into many handsome men at L’ Fragrance and they hadn’t had the same affect on her as Trevor Grant.
He probably thinks I’m dimwitted.
The way she had carried on, one would think that men scared her. Did Trevor scare her? She shook her head to get him out of it. It didn’t work.
She wasn’t afraid of Trevor at all. It was just that those hazel eyes turned her insides to jelly. She couldn’t help comparing Telvin with Trevor. Telvin, with his thin, still developing body, didn’t stand a chance. Telvin was just a boy but Trevor was all man. Once again she tried to shake thoughts of Trevor out of her head but he was there to stay.
After packing all she could for one day, Panzina rushed to shower and get dressed for the upcoming dinner date. She’d be totally professional and maybe he wouldn’t see her as a fumbling, awkward child. She was determined to act like someone with brains and intelligence. She wanted to impress Trevor Grant, if that was even possible.
Thirty minutes later she surveyed herself in the full-length mirror and the results pleased her. She had decided to free her hair of the usual French braid and now it cascaded down her shoulders. She pulled it back with a hair clip. She didn’t need any makeup with her copper toned complexion. Her aunt had always bragged that she was as pretty as any model. She had sharp features accented by her high cheekbones. Her nose was thin and fit perfectly with the rest of her.
Her five foot three inch frame was dressed in a form fitting full-length dress. The black dress was plain and simple, but it complimented her very well. She tied a leopard print, silk scarf around her neck, as was fashionable. She slipped her feet in high-heeled sandals that were also leopard print. She just loved to wear sandals. She’d just sprayed on her favorite cologne when the doorbell sounded. Her heartbeat increased as she went to answer and for a moment, she forgot that she was in mournin
g. She was just a young woman going out for a business dinner with a very attractive man.
Trevor looked astounding in a double-breasted, Armani suit and tie. This man totally contrasted the one who’d been overcrowding her living room, radiating pure maleness in his fitting jogging attire. Thinking about his rippling muscles made Panzina blush.
“You look quite lovely,” he complimented in his smooth tones, as his eyes swept over her.
“Thank you.” Panzina tried to hold his gaze but couldn’t.
“Let’s go.” He slid his arm through hers before she realized it, but she offered no resistance.
Instead of the black Mercedes that she’d ridden in before, he escorted her to a gold Lexus.
The man obviously has money to toss to the wind. She felt a stab of envy when she thought about her own car and how old and unreliable it was. She would have to make a decision about either having the transmission rebuilt or getting another car. But, she’d worry about that later. For now she’d concentrate on other things, like the handsome man sitting next to her.
Panzina admired the leather interior of the sleek car as they drove. From the corner of her eye she could see Trevor’s right hand drumming a beat to the sound that played on the stereo system. She found herself wondering what it would feel like if that soft and beautiful, yet strong hand should touch her. Would it be firm but gentle or rough and demanding? Like the car’s leather interior, she imagined it would feel smooth like silk while still offering the ultimate protection.
Her eyes crept up along his arm and rested on his face.
What a wonderful profile.
Trevor Grant was any woman’s dream man. He had the face and body of a male fashion model. His lips were thin, but perfect. If he should kiss her-
“- one of my favorites,” he said.
“I- I beg your pardon?” she stammered, caught completely off guard.
Panzina's Passion Page 4