“We’ll have plenty of time to think about our next move. Let’s concentrate on getting your friend put back together for now.”
“Look on the bright side, Scherer,” began Richter, “once we turn in Aldebaran we’ll have the reward money.”
They arrived at the door to the cargo hold. John entered the combination on the padlock and they entered. Aldebaran was sitting on Byron’s mattress, holding his head in his hands. He was bawling his eyes out.
“Hey,” said John, “big tough pirate captain! We’ve got some questions for you.”
Aldebaran didn’t respond. John strode up to him and pushed his shoulder.
“Come on, pull yourself together.”
Aldebaran looked up at John in confusion. “John?”
“You can call me Scherer. What happened to Seth?”
“John, it’s me. I am Seth. I restored myself on the station.”
“Prove it.”
Aldebaran wiped the tears from his face and stood up. His expression hardened, and he looked like he had just crawled up from the deepest pit of hell. There was also a hint of familiarity to him, and the combination was very unnerving.
“Once, back on Earth, you were in the orb room alone, working on the network connections. You were humming a tune to yourself, but you couldn’t quite remember how it went. You were off-key, and you said, ‘damn it, I’m flatter than a Kansas prairie.”
John raised an eyebrow. “That’s right. What else do you remember?”
“Everything. The past ten years of my life now have two sets of memories. One as Seth the AI computer and one as Aldebaran the pirate captain.”
“Why were you crying?” asked Fernwyn.
“Why do you think, Rylie? Seth was my conscience. I spent ten years hunting down my own people. Seth Aldebaran was a good man, a dedicated soldier, and a sincere Umberian patriot. Understanding what I did as a pirate breaks my heart. I remember the faces of every one of my brothers and sisters that I betrayed.”
“It’s not your fault. When the scientists removed your conscience and turned it into Seth, you became a different person. If you...”
“I’m not going to let myself off that easily. Even if I did, how can I forget what I witnessed?”
“You’ve got the rest of your life to figure that out,” said Richter.
“I should be executed for my crimes.”
John leaned against a stack of crates and folded his arms. He stared at Aldebaran for a few moments. “Let’s get some food and drink,” he said.
“Fine, leave me here,” said Aldebaran.
John advanced on the Umberian. “Fuck you, you’re coming with us. The Seth I know wouldn’t wallow in self-pity. Are you really Seth or what?”
“Y... yes.”
“Then you’ll listen to my commands. Get your ass into the galley. I’m hungry and I’m not done talking to you.”
Clearly impressed, Aldebaran headed out. The others followed him, and they climbed the stairs to the galley. This room appeared virtually untouched as well. John grabbed a pot of ancient coffee and poured himself a mug. He gestured for Aldebaran to sit at the table.
“Richter, can you throw some chow together please?” he asked.
“Roger that.”
Richter opened a cabinet and removed a box of pasta.
“Is that yutha?” asked Fernwyn, sniffing at the coffee pot.
“How the hell should I know?” said John. “Help yourself if you want.”
John turned a chair around and sat down, leaning against the back. Aldebaran stared ahead blankly.
“Your mission as Seth was to help liberate Umber, correct?”
“Of course,” said Aldebaran.
“How do the last few days change that?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean Seth still has a mission to complete. If you’re Seth now, that mission is yours. Am I wrong?”
“But I’m a war criminal. I can’t ignore what I did as a pirate.”
“You can’t change it, either,” said Fernwyn, sipping at her coffee.
John frowned. “Ari gave her life for us after she realized what she’d done. I was willing to give her a pass on that because you were supposedly controlling her, but her guilt was too great to overcome. She was one of my best friends, and may have been more than that in the future. By rights I should blame you for her death, but I don’t. Do you know why?”
Aldebaran shrugged. “No.”
“Because she told me she still had a choice. She was facing nearly overwhelming temptation but she still had one last bit of self-control in reserve, and she chose to ignore it. I have always accepted responsibility for every failure of myself to control my impulses, no matter how tempting the outside influence. So what I want to know is, did you have that after you were separated from Seth? Did you have that last bit of self-control, deep at your core, that knew what you were doing was wrong?”
“No.”
“Then I refuse to blame you for it.”
“Who’s to blame, then?”
“Blame the scientists who messed up. Blame the Zendreen for taking over before the scientists could rectify their mistake. Or blame your past self for volunteering for the experiment in the first place. Either way, no punishment that Umber or anyone else could possibly impose on you could be worse than having to live with those memories. So learn to live with it and move on.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
Fernwyn sat down at the table. “Look at it this way, Aldebaran. Seth still has a mission to complete. What greater redemption could there be for you but continuing to help us? If by some miracle we do something constructive toward the liberation of your home planet, what better way for you to make up for the carnage and mayhem of your pirating?”
“Maybe.”
“Consider the alternative. If you reject Seth and the mission, you’re only left with the part of you that you hate. If you can’t go on living like that, then you might as well kill yourself. If you’re useless to us we won’t stop you, but only after we’ve turned you over to the SUF for our reward. In fact, it remains to be seen whether or not you as Seth are more valuable to us than the reward money.”
“I’m not.”
“Normally I’d agree instantly, but it’s not my call.”
“Do you want to help us?” asked John.
“I don’t know. My mandate as Seth is very clear in my mind, but so is my guilt.”
“We need you to focus on Seth for now. Do me a favor and try and push your emotions to the side or a moment. None of us can afford to let our emotions control us.”
“If I could do that, I would help you.”
John stood up. “You have at least thirty-six hours to think about it. I want you to spend most of your time on the bridge. I refuse to let you wallow in solitude for the whole damn trip. I’m going to check in on Ray before I eat. Fernwyn, would you come with me please?”
“Sure,” said Fernwyn.
John climbed the stairs to the first level, and Fernwyn followed him.
“What do you think?” he asked, pausing in the hallway.
“He needs years of therapy,” Fernwyn replied, leaning against the bulkhead. “Seth or no Seth, I think he’s ten times as much of a liability than an asset. Think about what we could to with that reward money, John. Weapons, equipment, additional crewmembers, information... and the longer we wait the better that information will be.”
“I’m not so sure we have the luxury of time, Fernwyn. The Zendreen didn’t just pop over to see what was going on. They blew up the station without asking a single question first. We have to assume that since the Black Crest was going after Aldebaran that the Zendreen knew he was on that station. That’s the most likely reason why they destroyed it.”
“I disagree. The Black Crest wasn’t going after Aldebaran to turn him over to the Zendreen. He was already acting as a Zendreen agent. The Black Crest was going after him for the reward money, plain and simple. Why do you thin
k they sent so many ships after we tipped them off to the pirates? This action was in direct conflict with the Zendreen’s interests. I bet they destroyed the station to prove a point to the Black Crest. I don’t think they were trying to kill anyone at all.”
“But they saw this ship.”
“Yeah, they sure did. They’re going to put the pieces together. The Black Crest was there to corral Aldebaran, but why was Aldebaran there? Once they saw us they had their answer. Don’t forget that they have access to the same military records as the rest of the nebula.”
“Are they smart enough to figure it out?”
“You better believe it.”
“So what are they going to do about it?”
“Well, even when they do figure it out they won’t know whether or not Aldebaran was able to reconstitute himself with Seth. What they will know is that the probe that escaped ten years ago was successful in bringing back help, and that’s why you showed up. If I was them, I’d start increasing defense patrols. Obviously, relying on the Black Crest alone to capture you isn’t working.”
“Wait a minute, though, something about this doesn’t make sense. We have to assume that the Black Crest saw the Faith when they docked. If they were there to try to grab Aldebaran, fine, but don’t you think once they saw the Faith that they’d try to grab it, too? They could complete their own objective and their mission for the Zendreen at the same time.”
“Yeah, I don’t know... unless...”
“What?”
“The Black Crest were the first ones to disengage. We first thought they were running from the Zendreen, right? But don’t you think that all they’d have to do is point to the Faith and say, ‘look, we found the ship you sent us after!’ It would be the perfect excuse; make it look like they were tracking the Faith rather than Aldebaran.”
“Maybe they did just that, Fernwyn. Maybe the Zendreen simply said, ‘good job, we’ll take it from here.’ The mercs decided to cut their losses and get out of the way. If that’s the case, the Zendreen really were trying to kill us when they destroyed the station.”
“That scenario makes the most sense. I bet you’re right.”
“If I am, it’s rather disheartening. I was hoping we could make a clean getaway.”
Fernwyn nodded. “Nobody can claim to be clean of anything anymore.”
John walked down the hall and entered Ray’s room. Ray was fast asleep in his bed. John sat at the foot of the bed while Fernwyn leaned against the desk.
“If anything happens to Ray, I don’t know what I’ll do,” said John. “I wonder if I’ve gone too far already.”
“Weigh your choice carefully, John. Umber may never be liberated. Someday perhaps the SUF will realize it’s in their best interest to help, but until then the odds are stacked heavily against us. It’s not too late to turn in Aldebaran and retire. I wouldn’t blame you if you cashed in your cut and returned to Earth.”
“I don’t know who has the more difficult decision, myself or Aldebaran. At least I’ve only lost one of my friends. He lost his entire planet.”
“I’m with you, no matter what.”
John smiled. “Thank you.”
Twelve hours later John was sitting in the lounge, staring out at the nebula. Ray was still under from the morphine, and Aldebaran was almost catatonic on the bridge. John had grabbed a few hours of sleep, but was ultimately roused by persistent nightmares. His subconscious wasn’t convinced that Ari was gone. It was a painful reminder of the truth upon his reawakening.
John had filled his pipe half an hour ago but had forgotten to light it. The lighter rested in one hand and the pipe in the other. He smiled at the amount of time he could waste daydreaming, and lit the briarwood implement. The heady smoke swirled in a satisfying manner, and John was comforted. Getting the ship back was immensely pleasing to him, and the comfortable hallways provided a great deal of reassurance.
Resting his chin in his hand, John thought about Seth Aldebaran, gazing at the darkness of absolute zero. He thought about his relationship with Seth the computer, from the moment they’d first met him to the last time they’d spoken before Aldebaran and Ari made off with the ship. He was a pure being, without pretext, and his only shortcoming was his fractured memory. His personality was both carefree and deadly serious, depending on the circumstances. The ship felt empty without his omnipresence, but now he was there in the flesh, and it was that man that made John so disconcerted. Seth was his friend, and he couldn’t stand the thought of turning him in no matter how much money was for trade. Puffing heartily on his pipe, John decided at that moment not to do so. Fernwyn might be pissed to hear it, but she was still only one vote. Her stake in it couldn’t be ignored, however. John wondered if there wasn’t another way they could compensate her for the monetary loss.
John stood up and headed for Ray’s room. He opened the door. Fernwyn sat on the bed, talking with Ray.
“Hey, look who’s up,” John said, smiling.
“Hi, John,” Ray said weakly.
“How are you?”
“Terrible. Fernwyn tells me she’s going to call a police surgeon as soon as we get to Beta.”
“That’s the plan. We should have you back to health in no time.”
“I hope so.”
“Have you told him yet?” John asked of Fernwyn.
“No. I figured you’d want to do so.”
“Told me what?” asked Ray.
John grabbed the desk chair and sat down next to Ray.
“Ari is dead. The Zendreen destroyed the station and she was on board.”
“Oh my God. Are you sure she was there?”
“Yes. She saved our lives, though. She deactivated a device which was preventing the ship from leaving.”
“Intentionally?”
“Well, yeah.”
“Good for her, then. John, I’m sorry.”
“Me, too. Despite everything that happened she was still our friend. And I‘d finally decided to ask her for a romantic relationship. She was always a sucker for the bad boy type, though. I should have known I was no match for a pirate captain.”
Ray laughed and immediately regretted it. “Ow.”
“Take it easy. We’ll be on Beta in about a day. Ray, I may be upset about losing Ari, but I was much more worried about losing you. I’m glad you’re okay.”
“Aw, shucks.”
“Fernwyn, were Ari’s quarters to your satisfaction?”
“There was a soft bed there,” said Fernwyn, smiling. “So yes.”
“It seemed like a polite thing to say.”
Fernwyn produced some photographs. “I found these pictures in her desk. Earth looks like a nice place. I see the three of you have been friends for a long time.”
“Yes, we were,” said John, accepting the pictures. “Thanks. Say, I almost forgot to ask you about your job. Have you still been calling in sick?”
“There’s no point. My comlink is on the network and they’d be able to locate me if I used it. They’d know I was lying about why I was absent, so I simply haven’t called in.”
“Aren’t you going to get into trouble?”
“Oh, I imagine I’ve been suspended by now, barring a really amazing and convincing excuse.”
“Thank you for sticking with us, Fernwyn.”
“I wouldn’t miss it for the core.”
“I’m going to check in on the bridge. Keep on eye on him, will you?”
“No problem.”
John exited into the hallway. He puffed on his pipe to renew the burn, and headed toward the bridge. He felt happy, so much so that he wondered if he wasn’t becoming bipolar all of a sudden. He missed Ari, but the sadness had melted into a strange sentimental satisfaction. Perhaps her betrayal had softened his grief, or perhaps the thought of her at last being at peace was it. Most likely it was both. John paused before opening the door to the bridge, overcome by the thought of abandoning everything and heading back to Earth as quickly as possible. He closed his eye
s and imagined the day before they’d found Seth, and how simple things seemed then. Such a fantasy was fleeting, but powerful. John took a deep breath.
“I’ve made my choice,” he said.
Entering the bridge, John raised his hand in greeting. Christie sat at the nav station, and Aldebaran stood on the port side, staring out of the window. Tycho sat at Christie’s side, and Friday rested on the console.
“Tycho and Friday in the same room?” said John.
“I was surprised myself,” said Christie. “I think it’s because he’s here.”
“Too bad we can’t ask them anymore. What have you been up to?”
“I’ve been going over the systems with Aldebaran. He remembers everything about the Umberian end of things, so I’ve been teaching him how our own computers interact with the ship.”
“What about the matter transporter?”
Aldebaran silently held up a piece of paper. John accepted it and looked at it with confusion. Aldebaran had drawn a complicated circuit diagram.
“There it is,” he said softly. “I’m sorry but I can’t remember how to access it.”
“That’s no big deal. Thanks, though. Maybe Talvan will be able to shed some light on things.”
“You’re still considering a rescue?” asked Christie.
“If we can get in undetected, I think it’s worth a shot.”
“Talvan would be an invaluable addition to the crew,” said Aldebaran.
“Do you know anything about this virus he’s working on?” asked John.
“No. But if there’s anyone who can do it, it would be Talvan.”
The console next to Christie began to beep. The three of them looked at it in ignorance until Christie identified it.
“We’re being hailed,” she said, astonished.
John crossed to her. “Who the hell?”
“It’s someone called Leitke. Do we know him?”
“Allow me,” said Aldebaran, sitting in the pilot’s chair.
Aldebaran pressed a key, his expression hawkish.
“Hello, Reckless Faith, are you reading me?”
“This is Aldebaran. Go ahead, Leitke.”
“Finally! Cap, I was hoping you made it out of there. I can’t believe the Zendreen destroyed the whole damn station.”
The Tarantula Nebula Page 30