Vance settled the bill quickly once we finished and led me from the restaurant by the hand. We passed the pouting hostess, whom I threw a victorious look over my shoulder. No, I hadn’t forgotten her; yes, I was that petty, I admit it.
“Would you like to take a walk?” Vance asked. “Your shoes don’t look much good for walking, but it is a nice evening. We don’t have to go far if your feet start hurting.”
“A walk with you sounds great, but I have to admit these are new shoes and my feet are already killing me. Why don’t we just go back to Laurel’s apartment and relax until you have to get back to the hotel? I’ll even let you give me a foot rub.” I offered.
“As eager as I am to get my hands on any part of your body I can, your feet were not exactly the first part I had in mind, I have to admit. That said, I am more than willing to massage whatever needs massaging.” He said, laying the brow lift on me.
“Just the feet will do for now,” I said giving his shoulder a little shove, pushing him in the direction of the street.
He laughed and stepped off the curb to hail a cab. In short order, we were securely ensconced in a taxi and zipping back toward Laurel’s house. As soon as we slid into the back seat, Vance pulled me over into his side, and tucked me under his arm. I felt very at home snuggled into him. I rested my head on his shoulder, pleasantly full physically and emotionally, so much so I started to feel drowsy.
Vance’s voice pulled me back from the sleepy trance I was beginning to drift into. “No falling asleep on me. I might take it personally,” he said warmly.
I covered my mouth as I yawned a little. “Sorry, between the meal, how comfortable I am snuggled up to you like this, and the rocking of the car as we drive, I was feeling very relaxed.” I sat up and slid away from him a bit, pulling his arm from around me and taking his hand instead.
“Hey, I liked that,” he pouted.
“Yeah, me too, but if you want me to stay awake, something’s got to give. I promise once we get out of the car, you can put it back.”
He grumbled for a minute, but brought our joined hands to his mouth, kissing the back of mine before dropping them both to his thigh and resting them there for the remainder of the trip home. I thanked him for the meal, letting him know that while I was disappointed I didn’t get to partake of the onion blossom he promised, the quality of the food we had more than made up for it. He admitted that he was very relieved that it had been as good as it was, since he had found the location on the internet and only had the reviews on Yelp to recommend it.
“I guess my recent streak of luck is still holding out,” he said with his winning grin firmly in place.
“Since Vegas is off the table, perhaps we should consider other locales. We are remarkably close to Atlantic City, anyway,” I offered.
“If you were able to stay through the weekend, I might be coerced into taking a side trip,” he said slowly. “I won’t have any meetings this weekend.”
I rapidly did some calculating in my head. I had plenty of time of vacation time left at work. In fact, I’d arranged the trip because I had so much time on the books I had to use some up or I would lose it the following year. I knew my bosses would be pleased if I added another day or two to my vacation. The extra expense wasn’t an issue either. I could afford a hotel room for a night or two, and I didn’t think changing my flight would be too expensive.
My heart started beating faster as I contemplated the idea of taking a spur-of-the-moment trip off my original itinerary. Could I really do it? Could I be so impulsive? I looked at Vance with wide eyes. He was looking at me with a mixture of hopefulness and excitement. He nodded at me encouragingly, like he knew all the thoughts that were running through my mind because they’d just run through his, and he was just waiting for me to reach the inevitable conclusion.
A slow grin spread across my face. “Let’s do it. As soon as we get to Laurel’s let’s get on the computer and make this happen.”
Vance pumped his fist in the air and let out a whoop that echoed loudly in the small confines of the car, causing the driver to jump. The car swerved and horns honked loudly around us, accompanied by some shouts and vulgar hand gestures thrown our way. We simply laughed, our impetuosity making us giddy, while our driver had a few profane things to say about the crazy fare he picked up.
When we arrived at Laurel’s, we raced upstairs and I pulled out my laptop. I logged into her Wi-Fi and went straight to a trip-planning website since neither of us had been to Atlantic City before. We figured if we were going to gamble, we might as well start from the get-go. After scrolling through the reviews, we picked the hotel with the highest rating. Even though we’d decided to take a risk, there was no need to get crazy and go with something that only had three stars. We navigated to the hotel’s site to book a room. We argued for a few minutes over what type of room to get. I was fine with a simple room with no frills, just standard amenities. After all, all we really needed was a bathroom, a bed and enough room to store our belongings. Vance insisted we absolutely must have a suite with a fifteen hundred square foot bathroom, a multi-media entertainment center, and a deep soaking bath with a shower for two. He was passionate in his position, arguing that Lady Luck was a fickle bitch and must be treated with the utmost delicacy, spoiled beyond belief, coerced into smiling upon us and massaged into submission at any and all costs. I wondered out loud if he was planning on gambling or convincing her to carry his children.
He gave me a curious smirk then grabbed the computer from my lap, pulled out his credit card and made the booking. He navigated next to the car rental website and looked for available sedans. The first site he went to only had economy vehicles available.
Laughing, he looked at me. “It’s not a long drive, but there is no way I’m driving a Ford Focus for any reason.”
He moved on to another site, and it appeared they had all sorts of vehicles available. Even though it was more room than we needed, he was sold on a Chevy Equinox. He went ahead and reserved it, too.
He pinched his lower lip between his thumb and forefinger, causing it to pooch out a little bit, making him look adorable. I twisted to face him, tucking an ankle under my thigh and resting an elbow on the back of the sofa, to watch him think. I studied the way his hair flopped over his forehead and curled slightly behind his ears. He was probably due for a haircut, but all I wanted to do was run my fingers through the length of it. For as wavy as it was, it looked very soft and silky. I let my eyes wander to his strong profile, over the ridge of his brow and the perfectly straight, strong slope of his nose. There was a dusting of stubble over his cheeks and chin, not a heavy five o’clock shadow, you could definitely tell he shaved that morning, but it was obvious he would have to again the next day if he wanted to maintain that clean-shaven look.
He turned and caught me studying him. “What? I’m thinking,” he said, misinterpreting my gaze.
“Don’t hurt yourself.” I couldn’t help teasing him. “Just what are you risking life and limb over?”
He gave me a dirty look. “I’m trying to decide what time I will be finished tomorrow so we can leave. I want to get out of here early, so we have as much time as possible to enjoy ourselves.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his iPhone. Opening his calendar, he scrolled through the events scheduled for the next day. He smiled at me in relief.
“My only meeting is scheduled for ten. I think it will only go through lunch, so we should be able to get out of here around two.” He turned back to the laptop and navigated to the American Airlines website so I could change my flight. “Do you have any special plans with Laurel?”
My stomach dropped a little. I knew she was not going to be happy about the trip at all, given her pouting over the date that morning. I began to feel a little guilty as this trip would definitely qualify as a violation of the “chicks before dicks” code. I looked at Vance, my sudden bout of hesitation written all over my face.
“What is it? Did you forget about something
you had going on this weekend?” He looked like it was Halloween and someone had just stolen all his candy.
“No, we haven’t made any special plans. I just think she’s going to be upset with me for leaving early. She kind of gave me a hard time just for going out tonight.”
“Then invite her along,” he offered. “I don’t know if she’ll be able to get away on such short notice, but she’s more than welcome to join us.”
I pulled my phone out of my clutch and saw that it was only eleven thirty. I scrolled to Laurel’s number and smiled nervously at Vance as I listened to the line ring at the other end.
“Don’t tell me your date is already over.” Laurel answered without saying hello.
“No. We’re done with dinner, but now we are hatching evil plans of world domination and want to know if you want in on them.”
“Normally I’d be all over that, but my last attempt didn’t go so well and I’m currently on probation. Long story.”
“I know how it goes. In the alternative, how would you feel about an impromptu trip to Atlantic City tomorrow? Do the terms of your probation prohibit you from leaving the state?”
“Hell yeah! Great idea!” She exclaimed. I was a little startled when I heard a muffled, “Hey Pete! Do you have to work this weekend? Feel like going on a trip to Atlantic City?”
“Pete?” I mumbled into the receiver.
“Another long story,” she replied. “Well, not really that long, but not something I can explain right now.”
“I understand, but you are officially on notice that explaining will be done.” I warned.
“No chance I could avoid that bit of emotional bonding?” she whined.
“No amount of begging, pleading or offerings from your vast selection of shoes will save you.”
“Fuck.”
“That about sums up your situation,” I said. “We’ll finish making the arrangements and I’ll give you all the information when you get home.”
“Good deal. We’ll see you in about half an hour,” she sang before ending the call.
Vance was smiling at me as I set the phone down. “So, I guess we have to book another room?”
Chapter Four
The following afternoon, we were on the Garden State Parkway heading south to Atlantic City. My iPod was plugged into the on board docking station and Laurel and I were serenading Vance and Pete from the backseat. We’d decided to let the guys sit up front and bond with each other, but I didn’t think they’d been able to do much talking over our renditions of classic eighties hair band anthems. In all honesty, we were in the backseat because I was hoping to have a chance to corner Laurel about what was going on with Pete, but she’d been able to avoid the conversation with her vocal stylings.
We arrived in Atlantic City around six that evening after struggling with some weekend traffic on the Expressway. We checked in at the hotel and agreed to meet up at eight for dinner so we’d have some time to rest and clean up from our trip. As we were riding up in the elevator, I felt the butterflies begin to rise in my stomach again. I was going to be alone with Vance. In a hotel room. In close proximity to a bed. Hell, in the same bed, at some point. I hadn’t actually thought about this part when we made these plans. How had I overlooked this? Had he? I tried to look over at him out of the corner of my eye. He was lounging against the side of the elevator and laughing with Pete and Laurel about something Laurel just said. I had no idea what, since I was having my own mini-Fukushima over in my corner of the elevator. He seemed relaxed and not the slightest bit perturbed or even excited. There was no evidence of elevated pulse, nor tell-tale sheen of perspiration on his brow. I began to feel insulted. Shouldn’t he have at least been marginally excited about having this time alone with me? Did he think I was a sure thing? I huffed indignantly. If that’s what he was thinking, he could just go ahead and think again. I crossed my arms and thrust out a hip. I’d show him easy.
Somewhere in the deeper recesses of my mind, I realized that I was being irrational, and this was probably the result of my sudden case of nerves, but the psycho that had taken up residence in my frontal lobe was in control and she was taking no prisoners.
Pete and Laurel exited on a lower floor than ours, since they had one of the regular rooms. The elevator was then empty except for me and Vance, who smiled at me guilelessly. Of course, in my state of mind, I interpreted it as a leer and moved to the other side of small cab and glared at him. His face fell into a look of confusion.
“Is something wrong, Mimi?” he asked.
“No. Why would you think anything is wrong?” I responded airily.
“Um, maybe because you scurried to the other side of the elevator like I had some kind of communicable disease and are looking at me like I just farted in a room full of your relatives?”
My lips twisted in spite of my fit of madness. I tried to hold onto it, keeping my arms tightly crossed in front of me and back pressed to the wall, but my temper crumbled in the face of his furrowed brow and the look of genuine concern on his face.
I sighed. “I was just thinking about our sleeping arrangements.”
“And the idea of sharing a bed with me makes you think violent thoughts, if your body language is any indication,” he surmised as the doors opened to our floor.
We made our way to our room silently. He opened the door for me and I strolled in unencumbered as Vance was carrying both our bags. I looked around at the elegantly appointed suite, before turning back to him, feeling sheepish. I knew my behavior wasn’t making any sense, and I was beginning to feel embarrassed, but I didn’t know how to explain my temporary break with reality.
Vance dropped our bags by the door and moved to the sofa. He fell down into it, spreading his arms across the back.
“Why don’t you sit down and explain to me what is going on, Mimi?”
I sat down in the chair across from him and folded my hands into my lap. I unclasped them, then clasped them again. I ran a hand over my hair, before resting an elbow in my lap and covering my mouth with my hand. He looked at me expectantly, but didn’t rush me, as if we had all the time in the world for me to spit out whatever was screwing with my head.
“I’m sorry. I just had a little bit of a freak-out moment. I’m not really sure why. It just dawned on me that I never really considered the implications of us sharing a room, and there only being one bed and all, and…,” I realized I’d started to ramble, and paused, taking a deep breath.
“And you started thinking I had made certain assumptions about where our relationship was headed,” he offered.
“Well, yes. I suppose so. It kind of offended me,” I admitted.
“I see.” He nodded, considering my words carefully as he crossed his arms behind his head.
“I know I was being silly. You’ve been nothing but great. I don’t know what got into me,” I began to stammer. I stopped, blowing out a big breath. I decided ‘Screw it,’ and to be completely open with him. The worst thing that could happen would be that he thought I was totally mental, which probably wouldn’t be too much of a distance from where we already were. I didn’t think I had too much to lose.
“I got nervous. I really like you, more than anyone I’ve ever met in my life. The more we are together, the more I feel this connection between us, and it is so powerful. I feel like it should scare me, or I should feel threatened by it, or something, but I don’t feel any of that. I want it to grow so big that it consumes me. Sometimes, I just want to get lost in you.
“In the elevator, I realized that I never even paused to consider our sleeping arrangements even once. I don’t have a time frame for how much time is required before I sleep with someone, but I’m also not known for sleeping around. I wait until I feel comfortable, but at least I stop and take a mental inventory to be sure I am comfortable. I didn’t even give it a thought with you. It was as if we had been together for years and had slept together a million times, it was such a natural thing.
“That was what did
my head in. I had a moment of insecurity. I looked over at you and you looked so at ease. In the back of my mind, I wondered if you were having any of the same surreal thoughts I was, or if you were just more comfortable with the intensity between us, or if I was totally misreading the situation and this was just something far more casual for you. Unfortunately, this translated to a much more psychotic thought process in the front of my brain and I attributed it all to you just wanting to get in my pants, because that was much easier to confront than everything else.”
He smiled broadly. “That’s what I’ve been looking for, right there.”
“Uh, what?” I said, now more confused than before.
“That kind of unguarded honesty. You just put it all out there, showing me all that was inside you. Not just your head, but your heart as well.” He leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees and clasping his hands between them. “This is what draws me to you, Mimi. Your ability to take those kinds of risks with your emotions rather than wrapping yourself up in some kind of armor and hiding yourself away. Most people are afraid to be vulnerable, but you aren’t. You let people see you, really see you, and that’s beautiful. Your exterior is very attractive, don’t get me wrong. I think you are very sexy and I imagined having my hands all over you before I ever even spoke to you, but now that I know you, now that I have seen inside you, I crave your heart more than your body could ever satisfy.”
I couldn’t stop the tears that filled the corners of my eyes. If I’d had any doubts about him feeling the weight of the connection between us, they’d just been obliterated. He didn’t say he loved me, but he might as well have. He’d said he wanted—no craved—my heart. What he didn’t know at the time was he had already won it. I may have offered a little bit of myself just then, but Vance had always been the one completely unguarded, giving himself in large amounts, holding nothing back when we shared ourselves, our lives, our pasts with each other. Vance was the one who lived fearlessly. If I were to be perfectly honest, it was me who was doing the craving of hearts. How silly I was on the elevator? Vance and I had never even shared so much as a kiss. We had that near kiss before dinner the night before, but in the excitement of planning the trip, the opportunity never rose again. The night came to a close with just a warm hug at the door with Laurel and Pete in the living room watching us say goodbye. I was overcome with the urge to rectify that situation immediately. He had just given a very touching speech about how he wanted me emotionally far more than he was interested in me on a physical level, but what better way to express those feelings than by rubbing up against him like a cat marking its territory? It didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me either, but I was still going for it.
Shattered Perfection (The Perfection Series Book 1) Page 5