by Bethany-Kris
Resting back on the small sofa in his brother’s hotel room, Diego kept reading over the email again and again as though the words might change. Of course, they didn’t. It just … all seemed a bit surreal to him. There was an actual A-list manager that wanted to sign Diego on as one of his clients. It was a little scary. Completely fucking amazing, too.
Diego checked the flight details on the tickets. If he took Marty up on his offer, it meant he would have to fly to LA only four days after he got back to New York. He could already imagine how that would go over with his sister and her husband.
Rose would say no; she thought LA and all the possibilities waiting in the Land of Dreams was nothing more than bullshit at the end of the day. Certainly not the guarantee that college and a nine-to-five promised. Although, those things had never been something that interested him in any meaningful way. And wasn’t that the thing? Shouldn’t Diego be able to do something that he was passionate about? Something that would make him the happiest to do?
Trevor would back Rose up because that’s just what he did.
Already, he had a pretty good idea about how the LA conversation would end when he brought it up to Rose. Diego hated arguing but that was the thing. He knew now that if he really wanted to chase these dreams, then he couldn’t let anyone stand in his way. Even if that person was his sister.
Right?
The click of a latch had Diego glancing up from the laptop he had left on the coffee table with the email still open, waiting for his reply. The person who entered the hotel room was not at all who he expected, if only because Luv had called the room the night before to say his brother wouldn’t get back until the day he was supposed to leave.
Except …
There Renzo was.
Diego couldn’t help but smile at his brother’s entrance. “I thought you weren’t getting back until tomorrow?”
“Pulled some strings. They owed me at least one day with you after the week I had.” Renzo grinned and slammed the hotel door shut behind him. “And hey to you too, kid.”
“Not a kid, bro.”
His brother only shrugged. “You will always be a kid to me, even if we both know different.”
Diego barely had time to react to Renzo’s approach. He stood from the couch only to be engulfed in a warm, tight hug that reminded him of safety and home. Even in the spread of years that Renzo had disappeared from his life, those hugs remained the one thing that never changed when his brother came back.
They still grounded him.
It gave him love.
A long time ago, Diego stopped being pissed off about the fact that his mother cared more about drugs than them. He didn’t even know who his dad was except that he didn’t have the same father Ren and Rose did, but that asshole had never been around, either.
And none of it mattered.
He had a family.
One that loved him.
He refused to be bitter about the things he didn’t have when it wouldn’t do him any good to focus on all of it. His energy was better spent with the people that did care. Hadn’t they proved that to Diego time and time again?
Renzo slapped him hard on the back as he pulled out of the hug. He didn’t go far, keeping his hands firm and heavy on Diego’s shoulders to give him a good once-over with his sharp, familiar brown gaze. Those dark eyes of his brother didn’t miss a single thing, either. It was something Diego had come to learn, and he stopped trying to hide shit from Renzo because of it, too.
“I came straight to the hotel—supposed to head to the complex, but whatever. I promised we’d talk, remember? Shit changed, you know? Sorry. I’m here, though. Let’s talk.”
Diego laughed, as weak as it was. “Really?”
Renzo nodded. “Yeah, man. Of course. I mean, if you still need to.”
It was only then that Diego noticed how his brother was dressed. In all black. Right down to the army boots he wore that he laced tightly around the ankles. The bag his brother dropped by the door when he first entered was new. None of it was Ren’s usual get-up, and even the phone tight in his grip wasn’t his normal device, either.
Shit.
He really did come straight from the job.
“I—”
“What’s that?” Ren asked, nodding at the opened laptop.
Diego let out a hard breath. “An offer to fly to LA for work.”
That had his brother paying attention. “What?”
Now or never, Diego thought.
“A couple of weeks back,” he said, “when I was home in New York, I met up with Marty Lorde. You know him—he manages the rapper you like that came out of the Bronx a few years back. Remember?”
Renzo said nothing.
Just kept staring.
Diego kept talking. “He talked about signing me on as one of his clients. I’ve already built a following of my own. But someone like him could really help me to take it to the next level because I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing half the time, you know? Maybe he can help me get to LA and figure some stuff out. I really, really want to do it, Ren. I know it’s not college like Rose wants, and I’ll be leaving school before I can officially get my diploma, but I can finish everything and still take the exams even if I am out there. It’s what I want to do.”
“Diego.”
He swallowed hard, meeting his brother’s gaze as his rambling came to an abrupt stop. “Yeah?”
“New York isn’t like LA.”
“I know.”
He said nothing else. There was nothing else for him to say about that when he didn’t care that LA would be a whole new world to him.
Renzo bent down to get a better look at the email on the laptop screen. Diego stayed silent while his brother read through the details, and even after when Ren stood straight and scrubbed a hand down over his unshaven jaw.
“Huh,” Ren muttered.
“I know it’s not respons—”
“Fuck what’s responsible right now.”
Diego blinked. “What?”
All at once, Renzo turned on him again. His hands landed to Diego’s shoulders, and strong fingers gripped tight to squeeze with the comfort he hadn’t expected. “All I care about is what you want to do … as long as it’s really what you want to do, and you know you can always call it quits. You’re basically grown, Diego. A few weeks away from turning eighteen. You can make these choices on your own, even if they’re crazy or wrong or entirely right. They are yours to make. I know Rose thinks we need to be your stand-in for parents, but right now, I’m just gonna be your big brother. Okay? Tell me what you want to do. That’s what you’re gonna do.”
He took a second.
Just one.
“I want to chase my dreams. Even if that’s all they will ever be. Just dreams. I want to chase them.”
He knew that should terrify him. The not knowing. Except the thing was, Diego had never been the type to be afraid of the unknown. Actually, the relief of finally being sure he was going to go headfirst into whatever this was—jump from this edge he stood on—kind of felt like free-falling. And damn, he was so far from scared of what his future might hold because of it, too.
Renzo smiled wide. “Does that mean you’re going to LA next week?”
Diego’s gaze flicked to the laptop and then back to his brother. “Rose will—”
“Understand. She will. Eventually.”
Was Ren right? Would Rose understand why he had to do this like Renzo did? Diego certainly hoped so because he only had one answer to the question his brother asked.
“Yeah, I’m gonna go to LA.”
ELEVEN
Luv
Of course, Luv made her way to the airport to say goodbye before Diego headed back to New York. Yeah, she could have sent him a text or even called as they had exchanged numbers during his stay. It might have even been the easiest, or cleanest, thing to do. But he hadn’t asked her to come so at first, she held off until Renzo called and brought it up.
As far
as she knew, he wasn’t aware that Diego and Luv spent the night together. Or even that they had really made … was friends the right word?
It felt as good as any.
Better than anything else.
Nonetheless, Ren thanked her for looking out for his brother and said if she wanted, then she was more than welcome to come to the airport and see Diego off. He gave her the flight time so that she could make it there in lots of time, but in her typical fashion, she waited until the very last moment.
Just because she could.
Luv had never been one for goodbyes, anyway. Not the long, drawn-out type. Certainly not the sad ones with tears and hugs. Her lifestyle made it kind of hard to give any friend she made special time and attention when she was constantly coming and going, and never stayed in one place for too long. Not to mention, when a friendship couldn’t be deeper than surface things because of who she was.
And so, she much preferred to tell people—who she might care to meet again—that she would see them again soon. Whenever she could, that was.
She quickly realized, after Renzo’s call, that maybe she did want to see Diego again someday. When? Well, that she didn’t know.
That was okay, too.
Someday, they would run into one another and perhaps, they could pick right back up where they left off.
Or … that was the hope.
Sitting in the airport eatery with a mostly untouched sandwich in front of him, Diego was the first to notice Luv’s approach. The smile that graced his handsome mouth made her own grow in response.
“Hey,” he said, gaining the attention of the man sitting across from him.
Renzo, that was.
His older brother was quick to stand as Luv replied in kind to the greeting, happy that he didn’t seem put off by the fact she showed up without giving him a heads-up first. Or hell, maybe Ren asked her to come, and had known she might stop by before he left.
“Little late, huh?” Renzo asked, offering his seat at the table for her to take.
Luv did, shrugging as she dropped to sit. “Had some things to do.”
The guy gave her a look from the side, but Luv was more interested in the grain of the fake marble tabletop than anything else. Well, that was a lie. She could feel Diego’s gaze on her, but Renzo lingered at the table for a beat longer.
He told Diego, “I’ll be back in a few—we’ll head to security and you can get to your gate.”
“Got it, bro.”
It was only once Renzo stepped away from the table entirely that Luv gave Diego her full attention. He was still smiling.
So was she, now.
“You good?” he asked her.
She didn’t even have to think about that.
Or what it might mean.
“I’m great,” she told him honestly.
And she was.
Things were so much easier to deal with when shit never went too deep. She didn’t let anything get under her skin, including people. Or the time she spent with them.
Diego, though …
“I follow you now,” she said. “On—”
“Do you?”
She laughed because he hadn’t even let her get the name of the social app out. “Made an account only to keep up. I won’t be posting or anything.”
He flashed those straight, white teeth of his in a grin. It had her both rolling her eyes at his cockiness and laughing to hide the heat crawling up her cheeks that said she liked his arrogance just as much as she found it mildly annoying.
Boys.
The one thing in the world that could make smart girls stupid.
All facts.
“No, it’s good,” Diego said, waving a hand between them when he added, “and if you ever wanna catch up, at least you know how to find me that way. Right?
Well …
“Right,” she agreed. “I definitely want to do that. Catch up, I mean.”
“Yeah, me too, Luv.”
Her name in his mouth was a curious thing.
Sweet.
And full of sin.
It was the approach of a familiar figure that had her standing from the table, ready to leave. Diego joined her, and his arms opened her way with a hug that she didn’t even hesitate to take. Before his brother had even reached their spot, he’d given her a quick kiss on her cheek, close to her smiling lips, and then retook his seat. With arms folded, he winked under the wide brim of his baseball cap.
“Catch you later, Diego,” Luv said.
He nodded once. “Yeah, I’ll catch you later.”
Luv passed Renzo with a tilt of her chin that was subtly returned. She didn’t bother to check over her shoulder as she left. Time was a fluid thing to her. Something that kept moving around her though it didn’t really leave much of an impression with her.
One second to the next.
This job, then another.
Days, weeks, and months held very little meaning when there was nothing tangible keeping her tied to it all. Hell, she didn’t even have an official birthday to celebrate, so it wasn’t as if events like those mattered much to her either.
She didn’t know how long it would be before her path would cross with Diego’s, but the time in between didn’t really make a difference when she didn’t count time, anyway. Not like other people did. But she also wasn’t like other people.
Luv was just … Luv.
And at that moment, she had a new assignment to handle. Onto the next, she thought while heading out of the airport. What is will always be.
She counted on that.
More than anyone knew.
TWELVE
Diego
“You’re really doing this, huh?”
Diego resisted the urge to roll his eyes, but the desire quickly melted away when he lifted his gaze to find his sister’s husband leaning in the bedroom doorway. It wasn’t Trevor’s actual presence that had him checking his attitude, but rather … the way the man stared at him.
Or the gleam in his gaze.
The pride.
Diego stood a little straighter, feeling like he should. The open luggage on his bed was nearly full. Rose had another for him to use, but he’d have to pay extra for that to take it on the flight. It wasn’t that he didn’t need the extra shit in LA because he would. It was just that he could have it sent later with everything else.
“Yeah,” Diego said, nodding. “I’m doing this.”
Trevor chuckled. “You’ve never paid a bill, and you do all your banking on an app. You don’t even have your license, and I’m still not sure you know how to check if the chicken is cooked all the way through.”
“Hey. Rose showed me how.”
That had Trevor laughing.
Even Diego grinned.
“I’ll be okay,” he said. Knowing that’s what Trevor was trying to get at in his own way. A conversation, or a few, between all of them, including Ren and, well … Diego had a better understanding of the people around him.
How much they cared. The way they loved him. How terrified they were because they had spent their entire life looking after him and now, he was about to jump all at once into this thing called adulthood. Without a safety net. Still just seventeen, almost eighteen, but feeling invincible all the same.
Look, Ma, no hands. That kind of thing. His siblings had grown up so much faster than he ever needed to because of their circumstances.
They—specifically his sister and Trevor—understood a lot more about him, too. Which was why he found himself packing for LA with the support of Rose and her husband. Even if they did worry that he was making a mistake.
It was still his to make.
“I promise,” Diego said when Trevor didn’t reply. “I will be okay.”
His brother-in-law quieted.
Diego did, too.
“Yeah, we know you will, kid,” Trevor muttered, glancing down at the hardwood floor of Diego’s bedroom. “Gonna be quiet here with you gone. You know, we were trying to plan something for
your graduation. She’s not even going to get to see you walk across the stage.”
He still did it, though.
Graduated.
Rose said that was what counted.
“You can watch me do other things instead,” Diego pointed out.
Trevor nodded, clearing his throat. “Yeah, we will. And I’ll mail you that diploma, huh?”
“Better. Probably need it.”
“We are proud of you, Diego. I hope you know that.”
“I do.”
“I couldn’t imagine doing this at your age. My mother washed my clothes on the weekend for my first four years of college.”
Diego chuffed. “Fucking baby.”
“Watch it.”
There was no heat to Trevor’s words.
Diego closed his luggage and zipped it up. “Is she ready?”
“Downstairs. Waiting for you.”
Kind of like the rest of his life. Here he was, on the cusp of it. Ready to head straight into it. Everything else was just waiting on him. Wasn’t that the beauty of it?
Diego thought so.
• • •
“Flight LBO573 to …”
Hearing his flight number, Diego stood and adjusted the backpack on his shoulder at the same time he reached for his phone sitting on the arm of a seat next to his. Rose joined him, her hands tittering at her front and twisting in that nervous way of hers. The paint spatters on her fingernails that she hadn’t been able to remove after her art session that morning had his chest growing tight with fondness and the sense of home.
“Hey, I love you, okay?” his sister rambled, still keeping her hands at her front though he could tell the only thing she really wanted to do was reach out and grab him. Probably to pull him into her and hold him as tightly as she could. So then, he wouldn’t leave. She wouldn’t be terrified. “Call me as soon as you land. Remember to—”
Diego closed the space between him and Rose and hugged her. The act quieted her instantly, and it took all of one second before her smaller arms locked around his back. A good few inches taller than her, he was able to drop a kiss on the top of his sister’s head. He heard her sniffle but by the time they separated, any tears she might have shed were dried into the black, cotton hoodie he’d settled on wearing for comfort during the flight.