by Joya Ryan
Chloe finally tossed him a smile, then quickly glanced away. So he was in her mind. He was in her thoughts. And if the way she’d begun to open up to him was any indication, he was close to being in her heart.
That was enough to work with.
There had to be a way to have Chloe and freedom.
“Hottie McSearchy keeps staring at you,” Natalie said to Chloe.
Michelle leaned into the huddle they had going on and peered over the fire. “Which one is he?”
“He’s the one in the black T-shirt with the black hair and black eyes,” Natalie said. “Basically, he’s the tall, dark and buff one.”
“Thanks, Nat,” Chloe mumbled and sipped her beer.
East’s summer bonfires were casual and frequent, and Chloe hadn’t expected to see Gage. But…she was kind of happy to see him. The last couple of days since their date had left her thinking about a lot of things she shouldn’t. She was trying to focus on preparing for the anniversary event, yet her mind always drifted back to Gage.
How he made her feel safe whenever he held her. How he mastered the art of being intense and casual all at the same time. How he made her think…made her want. Yeah, Gage made her want a whole hell of a lot. Like more. Not that she’d ever really admit that to him, or herself even.
“And who is that?” Michelle pointed at the guy next to him.
“Easton Ambrose,” Natalie said with a huff. “He’s annoying.”
“And handsome,” Michelle said.
Natalie’s head snapped up, almost like she cared. Interesting. It was no secret East had a reputation with the ladies, and Natalie had…her cupcakes.
“Well now that we’ve addressed everyone’s staring problem…” Chloe nudged Natalie’s shoulder.
“Hey, as far as I can tell, the guy drooling at you from the other side of that inferno is the one with the problem,” Natalie said.
Yeah, Chloe was aware of that problem, because she was having some herself. Like thinking too much about him. Which needed to stop. Though the other night had been more real than any she’d ever spent with another man, and her dress had stayed on the whole time. Their date hadn’t been a fantasy. It’d been…normal. Like a relationship. And she’d actually liked his company.
She shook her head and tried to get her thoughts clear.
Keep it fantasy, not reality.
“Oh no…” Michelle said softly as a big fat raindrop beaded Chloe’s hair.
There was little more warning than that. The clouds unleashed gallons over all of them and beat down on the fire, sending everyone scattering to their cars or inside East’s house.
“I was going to take off anyway,” Natalie said loudly, unconcerned about the rain.
Michelle ran up to them, the poor girl’s perfect hair now a soggy mess. “Can I get a ride with you?” Michelle asked, and Natalie nodded. Chloe tossed her empty beer bottle onto the extinguished fire and headed for the car.
“Not afraid of the rain?” Gage asked from behind her. He held up his jacket like an umbrella and covered her head with it.
“It’s water. Nothing scary,” she said.
Water she wasn’t worried about, but Gage getting closer? Much more nerve-wracking. He was the one man who made her heart shake in her chest, and the closer he came, the less she could deny how she felt about him. And that terrified her.
She looked into his intensely dark eyes. With the orange glow of the fire gone and the clouds muting the light of the moon and stars, Gage’s gaze slid over her skin like a touch she wanted to get lost in.
She knew better, but he was her drug, and with him in front of her, she couldn’t say no.
She took a step forward, stood on her toes to kiss him—
“Ah!”—and fell right on her ass in the mud. “Oh, God.”
Gage smiled and bent to help her up. Mortification surged through her like hot water. This was nowhere near a fantasy. This was real and embarrassing, nothing sexy about it.
She moved to run away, but Gage caught her arm. “I thought you weren’t afraid.”
Right then, with his hand on her skin and his gaze searching hers, fear buzzed in her chest. But it wasn’t the rain, or even him setting it off—it was something deeper, something she’d been denying for weeks.
She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t stay. It was getting too real.
“I’m not. I’m fine,” she fibbed and hustled away. Gage caught up with her near the tree line before she reached her car. Everyone had left. A few people were inside East’s house. Gage closed in, the splattering sound of his boots tromping through the mud made her skin buzz. His entire presence was engulfing her.
He pressed against her. “When are you going to stop running?”
“When are you going to stop chasing?”
He stared at her for a long moment, uncertainty in his normally confident gaze.
“What if I said I wanted to keep chasing you for as long as I was in town?”
“I’d say you’re crazy.”
He dropped his coat, and the rain pelted them both. Even beneath the tree and in the darkness, she felt him. Smelled him. Wanted him.
“You come in and out of town,” Chloe said. “Anything longer than a weekend complicates things. Don’t you see that?”
He nodded, and Chloe arched an eyebrow. He was agreeing with her?
“What if complication was a consideration?” he asked.
“It doesn’t work that way, Gage.” She wiped her brow and moved her hair off her face as rain streaked down from the top of her head to her neck. “You come in for a weekend, we have a good time, and you leave. That’s worked well for us, but anything longer comes with…”
“Strings?”
Truth was, she was more attached to him than ever—and it terrified her. The more she felt for him, the more power he had over her emotions. Her heart.
Distance had provided an excuse before, but now he was standing in front of her, in her town for a few weeks, and she wanted to touch him all the time. She could think of little else—which was a problem. She was dangerously close to handing her heart over to a man for him to do as much or as little with it as he wanted.
And then, after everything, he would leave.
“We have great sex,” she hedged.
Gage frowned. “Can you look at me right now and say this is still just sex to you?”
She pursed her lips. No, this was absolutely more than sex, but she couldn’t say that.
“This is why I don’t date,” she whispered.
He ran his fingers over her cheekbone. “It’s only been a week.”
“It’s more than that.” It was the past two years. It was the way he looked at her, the way he tapped into every fantasy she had, the way he gave a damn. The way he made her cave.
She’d given in to him, and deep down, a raw part of her heart was already at his mercy. But there was no way she’d admit it.
No, she needed to get out of this wet, increasingly real moment. Now.
But when she tried to pull away, he grabbed her arm and stopped her.
“Don’t look at me,” she said.
He cupped her chin and lifted her face. “Why?”
“I have makeup everywhere and I’m all muddy and—”
“And you’re still gorgeous.” He took her hand. “Stop running, Chloe. Let go so we can fall together.”
She didn’t know exactly what he meant, but he took her several yards away from the house and down a small hill as the rain pounded on their shoulders. When they reached the crest, he tugged her with him and slid down the muddy hill.
She screamed and laughed, and Gage was right there with her.
He rolled over to face her, covered in mud and grinning ear to ear. “See, dirty isn’t so bad.”
“Maybe you’re right.” She scooped up a big handful of mud and slapped it on his cheek.
“Oh, you’re going to pay for that, sweetheart.” He smeared mud on her thigh.
“Oh, it’s
on now,” she said and leaped on him.
He hit his back on a thick patch of grass. She straddled him, but instead of searching for mud, she gripped his shirt and kissed him hard. The thick scent of rain and grass surrounded them. Her clothes were plastered to her body, and she wanted to peel them off and feel his skin.
The heat was too much to bear. It burned up every ounce of willpower she had. She wanted—needed—to feel him closer. Experience him again, because he was better than any roller coaster and gave her an incomparable adrenaline rush.
Gage caught on real quick and kissed her back. There in the sopping grass, she tugged on his shirt, and he hiked up her skirt. His hands slapped against her ass and flecks of water tickled her skin as he ground her body against his.
“Is this still reality or fantasy?” He pulled her bottom lip into his mouth.
“Both,” she murmured. She floated somewhere between the ground and sky, between emotions and lust. She couldn’t stop, and she didn’t want to—she needed him.
He ran his hands from her thighs, up her back, and then cupped her neck. He tilted her head and kissed her hard. Plunged deep to taste her, worked her lips with his powerful tongue. He relaxed further into the grass, grinding against her and sampling every inch of her mouth. His every muscle was straining and taut beneath her. The ridge of his hard cock pulsed between her legs while his biceps and abs flexed and cut out of his skin.
He was fighting something within himself. She sensed it. Felt it. As if content with having her stay right there with him, while also fighting the urge to push. But push for what? Push her for more? Or push her away?
She slowed her kiss, ready to ask if what she was reading from his body was right, but he didn’t let her get a fraction from his mouth before he yanked her back.
“Don’t move away from me. Not tonight.”
“What’s happening, Gage?” she asked. Because something was happening. With him. With her heart. With their relationship.
“I’ll have to leave at some point.”
“I know,” she whispered against his mouth. He had missions to go on. But he held her like maybe he’d come back. Like he’d just travel for work for a few days and that was it. Not the end of the world surely. Or maybe she was reading into his hold on her. Maybe she wanted him to stay more than she’d realized.
“You’re here now,” she offered.
“Yes, and this is where I want to be.”
That was all she needed to hear. Gage wanted to be here. With her. That was something, right?
Chloe nodded and found his mouth with hers once more. She wasted no time unfastening his pants. Keeping his hot kiss on her, he reached between their bodies, grabbed a condom from his pocket, and slid it on. She couldn’t wait any longer. She was starved for him, and he wanted her, too. Wanted her to stay.
“Gage,” she whispered. She moved her panties aside and surged down on him, hard and fast and dirty.
So dirty, and she loved every single second.
“Fuck, baby, yes,” he groaned. With one arm wrapped around her middle and fusing her to his body, the other reached up and yanked down the top of her dress. Cool rain pelted her sensitive breasts, hitting her nipples and beading them so hard she moaned.
“Don’t you dare stop.” He pulled her down even further on top of him until her breasts bobbed above his face. He latched on, sucking the entire peak into his mouth. She gripped the grass on either side of his head and bore down. Rocking back and forth in hard, distinct thrusts, keeping him deep while hitting every internal nerve.
“Stop?” She whipped her hips again. “I’m just getting started.”
He grinned and bit her nipple gently. She gasped—the sting of his teeth and the rain pelting her skin lit her up like a bolt of lightning hitting the ocean.
Her knees dug into the soft wet ground as she moved over him. She shifted her hips to take him deeper. Everything fell away when she ground down so hard the tiny bundle of nerves pressed against his pelvis and his cock rubbed that perfect spot inside.
“Oh God.” She whipped her hips again. “Oh yes, right there.”
“Making yourself come on me already, sweetheart?” He gave a final kiss to her breasts, then threaded his hand in the back of her hair, bringing her face to face until the tips of their noses touched. “Do it. Use me to make yourself come. Let me feel it.”
She was helpless not to. He was giving her power to take him. Use him. Feel him. And she would. Because reality or fantasy, she had him right now. All his strength and power was under her, and she was clinging to it. To him.
Her inner walls tightened, her stomach fluttered and tensed as thick lava climbed her spine…
“Thatta girl. I feel you. You’re right there. So fuckin’ sexy, sweetheart.”
His dark rasp was all it took to kick her release over the edge. Her body cracked and popped with an orgasm so intense it felt like she’d been shot from a cannon. Over and over she gripped him, seeking more but on the brink of too much.
This right here, as he looked into her eyes and they moved in sync, this was more real than ever before. This was the connection she’d been running from for so long—and now that she’d had a taste, would anything less be enough?
He growled her name and lifted her up, spinning her and pushing her back against the ground. Blades of grass scratched her skin while Gage’s hot flesh pressed against her front. His massive body mostly shielded her from the downpour, and his dark eyes practically glowed in the night, like a predator. Like a man on the brink of devouring her.
“Don’t you dare stop,” she said, repeating his command to her. She bit his ear as she threw her hips up to take his length in and out of her. “This is what I’ve wanted.” She grabbed his ass, digging her nails in, and he groaned to the sky.
“You make it hurt,” he said, so much pleasure lining his voice.
“So do you.”
“Do you like it as much as I do?” He thrust hard back inside her.
“Yes…maybe more.”
“Impossible,” he whispered into her hair, then kissed her. His wet chin scraped against hers and the prickle of him taking up every inch of her body was consuming.
In and out he took her, each surge inside more powerful than the last. He drove his arms beneath her shoulders and wrapped her in a hug, clutching tight as he worked faster and faster.
She gasped his name as another release spired through her body like pop rocks in soda. He held her so tight that she thought he might never let her go.
“Chloe…there’s got to be a way.” He groaned as his body stiffened, and he gripped her even tighter as his release flooded him. He shuddered against her.
There’s got to be a way?
What was he getting at? Was he saying there must be a way for them to be together? To make this work? To date?
She wasn’t sure, but as his strong chest rose over her, she knew no matter what was possible, reality always won out.
As they caught their breath, she opened her eyes to rain crashing down on them. This wasn’t a fantasy. This was real. And she had no idea how to get out.
Gage unlocked his front door and ushered Chloe inside. They were both caked with mud. He’d never felt more alive than when he was inside her, surrounded by nothing but nature and her skin. His back still hummed from where the rain had hit him as he drove in and out of her.
Elemental, primal, wild.
Everything he experienced with her tapped into the next level of need. Any time, any place, he wanted her—and he didn’t want to give her up.
His plan was becoming heavier by the second. His team was out there without him when he ought to be out there helping them find those people—how was he supposed to give that up?
Gage shook his head—he’d deal with it later. Every moment spent with Chloe pulled him deeper and deeper into a situation he wasn’t sure how to tackle—but he couldn’t stop. Not now. Not when he’d already come this far.
He needed to show her the
y could work while he was here. That even when he left, they could still have a relationship of sorts when he was away. He’d visit more often, stay for longer periods of time. Surely he could make that good enough and have it both ways…
“Come here.” He walked her into the bathroom, turned on the shower, and faced Chloe. “I really want to say something about you being such a dirty girl…” He smiled and tugged on her sodden dress. Mud streaked all over her legs and in her hair. She looked like a wild Amazonian goddess.
“If you did, I’d counter with you’re the one who makes me dirty,” she said lowly.
“Is it bad that I like that?”
She shook her head. “No, I like it, too.”
He took off his shirt, then his jeans, and when they were both naked, he led her under the spray of the water. He lathered up soap in his hands and washed her neck. His thumbs slid along her jaw, massaging and cleaning away the mud.
It was incredible how she responded to him. They were naked, yet this wasn’t sexual. It was almost…nurturing. He was happy to just touch her. Revel in her beauty and wash her. Keep her close.
“So, we both want to be dirty together,” he started. “Why don’t we?”
She peeked open an eye. “What?”
“Give in to me,” he whispered.
“I gave you your date. And romance.”
“I know. But I want more.” His hands roamed from her chest to her arms, spreading the bubbles. “I don’t know when I’ll be called out on the next mission, but I want you to spend however long I have left here with me. We can—”
“Pretend there’s more between us than there actually is?” she snapped.
“That’s where you and I differ. I know there’s more between us.”
“There can’t be,” she said. “You know how bad that’d be.”
“So you want to keep doing what we’re doing without ever exploring more?”
Her wide eyes searched his face. She wanted to say something—it was on those pretty lips, but she held it back and glanced away. He grabbed the soap and placed his lathered hands on her chest.