by Gill Lewis
She pushed a baguette crust through the wooden crate for Sôok-dìi. “So you come to us today?”
Kham grinned. “It’s our favorite place.”
Madame Philippe leaned against the wall and lit a cigarette. She was older than old. She had white hair, wide-set eyes, and the big nose of a falang. She always wore long, colorful dresses and silk scarves, and bright red lipstick. Kham said that her grandfather had been a French diplomat and she thought of herself as French. Sometimes she only spoke in French all day. Today was an exception.
“You should come here every day,” she said. “Word gets around. The falang want to see Madame Philippe’s dancing bear.”
Kham took another bite of croissant. “Wait till you see our new show.” He grinned and nudged me. “Go on, Tam, you tell her.”
I shook my head and picked almonds from my croissant.
Kham leaned close to her. “Today you will see, for the first time, the French lady at the bar!”
Madame Philippe took a deep puff and exhaled, letting out a steady flow of smoke through her nostrils. “Oh yes?”
Kham nodded. “Look here. These belong to the bear.” He opened a shoulder bag. “Maybe we could borrow a table and chair for our French lady.”
Madame Philippe peered in the bag, then threw back her head and laughed. “This I can’t wait to see.”
Kham and I waited until more tourists had gathered in the square. I bought Sôok-dìi a bag with frozen orange juice, pulled off the wrapping, and let him suck on the block of sugared ice. He held it in his paws, licking it and scrunching at the ice with his front teeth.
“Look,” said Kham. “A busload of tourists.”
He grabbed a plastic table and chair from Philippe’s and we guided Sôok-dìi though the traffic. I had the head collar tight around his head, but still he wanted to pull me back to Philippe’s, to the smells of sugar and bread.
The falang were spilling out of the bus and swarming into the square. Some of them started taking photos of the temple, but I noticed others were pointing at Sôok-dìi.
Kham set the chair and table in the center of the square and put his brother’s CD player on the ground. French café music filled the air around us with the strange sounds of foreign instruments and a woman’s voice.
“She sounds like a strangled chicken,” I said.
Kham leaned into me. “It’s Edith Piaf, famous French lady, Madame Philippe’s favorite.” The falang spread around us in a semicircle. I clapped my hands for Sôok-dìi to stand up. He reared on his hind legs, flapping his front paws, while I opened the shoulder bag and laid out clothes on the ground.
Sôok-dìi dropped onto his forepaws to nose the clothes and brought each item to me. Each time I rewarded him with honeyed peanuts. We’d kept him hungry so he would be keen to do the tricks. I wrapped each piece of clothing around him: a dress, a scarf, and then a big floppy hat. He let me put them on, draping the scarf around his neck. He even pulled it across with his mouth.
I hated making him dress like this, but Kham insisted. He said the One-Eyed Bear Man’s bear dressed as a king while the Bear Man got him to dance to his tune.
Out of the corner of my eye I could see more people, not just falang but locals, too. They all wanted to see what the bear could do.
“Hup,” I said when Sôok-dìi was fully dressed in the floating dress and floppy hat. People laughed and took photos while Kham walked around them, collecting money in his hat. I tried to ignore them, tried to concentrate on the trick. Sôok-dìi followed me to the table and chair. I patted the chair for him to climb on. He climbed up but the chair tipped backward, and he tumbled over his head, his dress flying up, showing his backside in the air. He scratched his bottom, and people howled with laughter and clapped. Sôok-dìi didn’t seem concerned. I put the chair up and he climbed on, nuzzling in my hand for peanuts. He sat there, a well-dressed French bear. A French lady bear.
I went to the second part of the act and threw a cloth across the table. Sôok-dìi patted the cloth with his paw and hooted, and again people laughed. I let him snuffle the peanut from my hand, and then I put a plastic bottle on the table and pretended to pour a glass, but Sôok-dìi took the bottle from me and held it like the milk bottle I had given him when he was small. He guzzled the sweet orange juice inside.
People clapped and cheered. I could hear Kham calling them over for a photo. Some took photos and many threw more money into our hat. Sôok-dìi was bored now that there was no food. I could see him trying to pull the clothes off. He tugged the dress and I heard a rip.
Kham nudged me. “Look, another bus group. We’ll be rich today.”
“No,” I said. “He’s done enough.” I pulled the clothes from Sôok-dìi, and he tried to claw the paper packet of nuts from my pocket.
“Just one more,” said Kham.
“No, he’s done for today.”
Kham picked up the hat and glared at me, but I took Sôok-dìi by the head collar and led him back across the street.
Madame Philippe waved at us. “Stay,” she called. “Our customers want more.”
I kept walking across the street to the alley where we’d parked the bike and cart. I looked back to see Kham taking the table and chairs back and talking to Madame Philippe. I heaved Sôok-dìi into the trailer, throwing honeyed nuts to lure him in. I buried my head in his soft fur.
Sôok-dìi nuzzled my hand and snuffed my hair.
I closed the lid on him as a shadow fell across the crate. “Kham . . . ,” I said.
I turned.
But it wasn’t Kham.
It was someone else.
I could hardly speak.
I managed to squeeze the words from my mouth. “What are you doing here?”
“Noy!”
Noy stared back at me. He seemed taller than I remembered. He looked so different in a white T-shirt, faded jeans, and sneakers.
“Noy, what are you doing here?”
Noy walked around the trailer. “So this is what you are doing now.”
“Well, not just this,” I said.
Noy leaned against the seat of the bicycle. He folded his arms and glared at me. “A bit of a shock seeing me, is it?”
I took a step toward him. “Noy!” I smiled and held my arms out. “I just didn’t expect to see you here.”
Noy spat on the ground. “Neither did I. Last we heard, you were in Thailand.”
“What?” I said.
“Thailand,” said Noy. “When the money didn’t arrive, we were told you’d left your job and disappeared to Thailand.”
I felt sick. “When the money didn’t arrive?”
Noy narrowed his eyes at me. “Don’t pretend you don’t know.”
“Noy!” I almost shouted at him. “What do you mean?”
Noy stood up and paced around me. “Your ma received one payment and then we were told you’d gone.”
“One payment?” I pressed my head against the crate. “Are you sure?”
“It’s not been easy for her, Tam. Or for any of us.”
I looked at Noy, but his face was hard stone.
“You left us, Tam.” he said. His face darkened. He looked like a boy again. “You left me.”
“I had no choice, Noy!” I was shouting now. “But I haven’t stopped working. I’ve been at the same farm, the bear farm. My boss, the Doctor, said he’d sent the money home.”
Noy turned to the sound of splintering wood as Sôok-dìi tried to claw his way out.
I repeated the words as the truth sank deep inside me. “The Doctor said he’d sent the money home.”
“Tam?”
I turned. Kham was standing behind me, a bag of croissants in one hand and the hat bulging with the money in the other.
He looked between Noy and me.
“This is Noy,” I said. “A friend from home.”
Noy glared back at me.
We didn’t look much like old friends.
Kham tightened his grip on the hat.
Kham took a back step.
I grabbed the hat from Kham before he could stop me, and opened it in front of Noy. “Look!” I said “Look!” A thick wad of bills filled the hat, weighed down by coins.
Noy’s eyes widened.
“That’s what I’m taking home, to Ma and Mae and Sulee.”
Noy frowned.
“They are okay?” I pulled on his arm. “Tell me they’re okay?”
Noy pulled away. “They are well. Mae was lucky. She pulled through the sickness.”
“What sickness?”
Noy’s mouth curled downward. “Not long after you left, a sickness came with the rains.”
I said nothing. A breeze blew a plastic bag. It scuttled past, along the sides of the alleyway.
“Four died,” said Noy. “My father was one of them.”
“Your father? Noy, I’m so sorry.” I wanted to reach out to him, but Noy just continued to glare at me. “But who is our chief now?” I said.
Noy let out a short laugh. “My brother. Who did you think? My father’s pig would do a better job.”
“Tam,” Kham nudged me in the ribs. “We must go. See, Sôok-dìi is getting restless.”
Sôok-dìi had worked one of the wooden slats free while we were talking.
I held the money in Noy’s face. “Come back to the village with me. Come back with me and we’ll bring this money with us. I have more. I have more to bring.”
Kham snatched the money hat and shoved it in the shoulder bag. He swung his leg over the bicycle and spun the pedal around, ready to be off. “Come on, Tam.”
I climbed up beside him and wrapped my arms around his waist.
I turned to Noy. “How will I find you?”
Noy backed away.
“Where are you staying?” I called.
“With friends,” he said.
“What friends?”
“I have friends here in the city,” said Noy. “I work for them.”
Kham pushed the pedal down, and the bicycle lurched forward.
“Find me!” I yelled. “Come to Sone Motors and find me!”
Kham pedaled out into the bright sunlight of the street. I looked back, but I couldn’t see Noy. He was hidden from me, hidden deep within the shadows of the alley.
I sat cross-legged on the cool concrete of the bear barn. Sôok-dìi was stretched out in his cage. Water dripped from his fur where I’d hosed him down.
Kham put the hat with the money on the floor between us.
“It looks like the most we’ve ever earned,” I said.
Kham tipped it out, the coins raining on the concrete. “Your friend was very interested in the money,” he said.
“He’s saving for his family.”
Kham shrugged. “He didn’t say that.”
I glared at him. “He didn’t have to. He’s going to make money and take it home.”
Kham started counting out the money in two piles. “Did he say what he was doing or where he was staying?”
“No,” I said. I felt hot and sticky. Kham’s questions crawled like ants across my skin. “Why should he?’
Kham stopped counting. “Look, Tam,” he sighed. “There’s bad stuff in the city. Bad people, too. And some people who come here become lost. They lose themselves.”
“Noy’s not like that,” I said. “He’s my friend. He’s family.”
Kham resumed counting. I just stared at the money piling in front of us. The bears snuffled. High above, a lone bird fluttered against the tin roof, trying to find a way out.
“Ninety-six dollars,” he said, counting out the last few notes. “We’ll be rich on this.”
“The Doctor lied to me,” I said.
Kham continued counting. “If we’d stayed at Philippe’s longer, we could have earned double.’
“He lied,” I said. “He said he’d send money home, but he lied.”
Kham sighed and sat back and looked at me. “So what are you going to do about it?”
I ran my hands through my hair and stared upward. The bird threw itself again and again at the roof. I wished it would find its way out. I said nothing. I knew there would be nothing I could say or do to make the Doctor give back the money he owed.
But I knew what I was going to do. I was going to get Sôok-dìi out of here. But first there was something else I needed to do, something I needed Kham to help me with.
“I need to take this money home,” I said.
Kham nodded and pushed one pile of money toward me.
“I’m taking the money I have to Ma.”
Kham put his share back in the hat.
“I could go next weekend,” I said. “I could take a riverboat on Friday and come back Sunday. Two days. That’s all. The Doctor wouldn’t know.”
Kham fiddled with the edges of the hat.
“But there would be no one to feed the bears,” I said.
Kham got up to leave.
“Kham?” I said.
Kham looked up at me. “Okay, Tam. Just this once. Just this once I will feed the bears.”
“Really? You’d do that?”
“Just food and water,” he said. “I’m not cleaning them.”
“Thank you, Kham,” I said. I wanted to hug him. “Thank you.”
Kham handed me my share of the money, and we each counted out some for Sôok-dìi’s treats.
Kham counted extra for Sôok-dìi. “Put more for him,” he said. “He needs a pay raise.”
“A pay raise?”
“Didn’t you see how the falang loved our lady bear today?”
I laughed. Although I hated seeing Sôok-dìi dressed up, he had drawn in the crowds. They couldn’t get enough of him.
“So,” said Kham, “he needs accessories . . . a little handbag, a necklace. Maybe some lipstick!”
“Lipstick?”
“Oh yes,” said Kham with a wicked smile. “Think of the money. A dollar for a photo with the bear, ten dollars for a kiss.”
I couldn’t concentrate on anything all week. I wanted so much to go home, to see Ma, to see my family. I bought more silks for Ma and a dress each for Mae and Sulee. I folded the rest of the money in the honey tin and kept it safe, high in the crack between the corrugated iron roof and the wall. The tin was packed full with money. I’d never earned so much before. It could buy Ma rice and chickens, maybe even a buffalo. I hadn’t asked Noy if Ma still had the house or the land we’d been given. Maybe we could even buy some fruit trees and hives and keep bees like Pa had wanted us to. I didn’t know how much to keep back for Sôok-dìi, but I knew Ma needed the money more. I’d save up again for money to get Sôok-dìi back into the forests.
“Mountain Boy!” The Doctor clapped his hands in front of my face. “Wake up!”
I jolted from my daydream. The hose in my hand was dribbling a steady trickle of water on the floor. I started hosing the floors, spraying water beneath the cages.
“This place must be clean for General Chan and his daughter.” He rubbed his hands together. “My bears are getting a reputation as the bears to cure all ills.”
As much as I hated the milking days, I looked forward to seeing Savanh. She had come each week with her father to drink the fresh bile from Biter. She’d told me I should learn to read. If we were alone, waiting for Biter’s sedation, she’d even try to teach me, dipping her finger in water and tracing Lao script on the dry concrete. I’d watch the dark patterns form and disappear as the words dried up in the heat. Even the bears seemed calmer with Savanh there.
I heard General Chan’s car pull up in the yard and watched as the Doctor hauled open the sliding doors. But neither the General nor Savanh was in the car. The driver opened the back door, and Savanh’s friend Talin stepped out.
He walked up to the Doctor. “General Chan’s daughter is too sick to come today,” he said.
The Doctor studied Talin’s face.
“Please send his daughter my best wishes.”
Talin pushed his sunglasses up on his head. “The general says that he would like to have a meeting with you next week. He does not think your bears are of the top quality and he may look elsewhere.”
The Doctor smiled through his teeth. “These are the best bears, I can assure him.”
“Well,” said Talin, “General Chan is not convinced. He would like me to buy some fresh bile today, but he will see you next week.”
“Yes, of course,” said the Doctor, bowing and backing away. “Of course.”
Talin waited in the office while we milked Biter. The Doctor was rougher with Biter today. He hauled him from his cage. He jabbed hard to find the bile and left him sore and bleeding. The Doctor’s jaw muscles clenched and unclenched as he worked.
The Doctor swirled Biter’s bile in the glass flask and held it up to the light. It was a dark brown greenish sludge, tinged with blood. “Here, Mountain Boy. Give this to Talin. Tell him that this is for free today.”
I nodded and took the bile. I found Talin in the office. He was sitting back in the chair, a bored expression on his face. I emptied the flask into little glass vials and gave them to him.
“This is for General Chan,” I said. “The Doctor says there is no charge today.”
He took the vials without a word.
“Please,” I said, as he took a first step outside.
He turned.
I stared at my feet. “Please can you say hello from me to Savanh.”
Talin snorted a laugh.
I felt my face burn.
“Savanh has more on her mind than listening to well wishes from a cleaning boy,” he said.
I watched him climb in the car and leave. It slid out of the yard into the traffic of the road and disappeared. I glanced back at the Doctor. So Savanh was sick again and General Chan wasn’t pleased. The Doctor’s bears weren’t so special after all.
It was hard leaving Sôok-dìi that night, knowing I wouldn’t see him for another two days. I knew Kham wouldn’t want to let him out, so I let Sôok-dìi play in the barn for longer. I let him play his favorite game of melon soccer, chasing a melon around the barn. I did wonder if I could take him with me. But could I take a bear on board the riverboat? Where would I keep him at the village?