by Floyd, Susan
Telling his brother what had happened to Bev and the children was simply one more unpleasant task in a long series of unpleasant tasks. The quicker he did it the better. He didn’t want to chat about the weather, didn’t want to ask how his brother was doing. Shame—in the form of a chiding voice that sounded an awful lot like the woman who had opened her household to his nieces and himself—nudged his conscience for not making the trip earlier. Brady closed his eyes and pretended he wasn’t affected by the fact that this drive had taken him two hours and five years to make.
A buzzing sound told him the door was being unlocked. Brady stood and slowly turned, his heart hammering right behind his eyes. Carson looked so different, Brady almost didn’t recognize him. He’d always been quiet and serious, but now he seemed so guarded that Brady got the feeling his brother was always ready to strike the first blow.
“What do you want?” Carson asked, sitting in the chair on the other side of the table.
Good. Just the way Brady wanted it, short and to the point. But somehow he didn’t know where to start.
“Come on,” Carson continued. “I’m sure you’re not here for the scenery.”
“It’s about the girls.” Suddenly Brady didn’t want to say what he needed to.
For the briefest of moments, Brady saw pain flash through his brother’s eyes before he controlled it. “They’re okay?” he asked.
“Yes. Now.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“Bev’s dead.” He was blunt to the point of cruel, but there was no other way.
“Dead?” Carson gave Brady such a dark look that he began to feel as if this was somehow his fault.
“Suicide, they think.”
Carson digested the information for a moment, then spoke a single word. “When?”
“Friday night, maybe yesterday morning.”
Carson’s face turned ash gray. “Where’re the girls?”
“They’re staying with their schoolteacher, Dana Ritchie. Bev left them with her on Friday afternoon. Dana called the sheriff’s office and they got in touch with me. We found Bev the next day when we went to get some of the girls’ clothes.”
“Did she leave a note? Have any of her friends said why she would want to commit suicide?”
Brady shook his head. “We’re still interviewing people.”
“You’re sure it’s suicide.”
Brady shrugged. “As far as we can tell. There were no signs of a struggle. The M.E.’s report will be more conclusive.”
“The poor girls. They must be devastated.”
Brady cleared his throat. “There’s more.”
“More?” Carson looked as if he didn’t want to know about it.
“Uh, there were signs of neglect.”
The shame he’d tried to ignore earlier burned through Brady as he watched the agony on his brother’s face. Regardless of Carson’s crimes, he wasn’t a bad father. He loved his girls so much that he’d broken the law to keep their mother happy. Brady swallowed back the sympathy. Carson should have realized that no amount of money would make Bev happy.
“Neglect or abuse?” Carson asked after a moment.
“Physical abuse? She never hit them. Emotional abuse? Certainly. Neglect? Definitely. All too often the girls were left to fend for themselves. Karen’s reluctant to say much, but what she has said tells us Bev could be gone for days at a time. Karen has taken care of her sisters as well as she could, but they lived in terrible circumstances.”
Carson’s mouth was tight when he said, “Tell me everything.”
Brady did. “Their house was unbelievable. Bev’s room was immaculate, while the kids lived in squalor. The toilet didn’t work, and from the looks of it, hadn’t been working for days. I know she had money, but she didn’t spend any of it on the kids.”
“What’s going to happen to the girls?”
“They’re staying with their teacher until the end of the week. We’re going to get married Friday and apply for temporary custody.”
Carson actually snorted.
“What?” Brady couldn’t keep the defensiveness out of his voice. “It’s the only way I could convince her to keep the children. I’m in a studio apartment and the kids would have to go to foster care until I could find a better place. One family member in the system is enough.”
“Have you known her long?”
“It doesn’t matter how long I’ve known her.”
Carson stared at him. “What does that mean?”
“Let’s just say that we’ve become close, very quickly.”
“How many months?” Carson persisted. “These are my children, I have a right to know who’s going to be taking care of them.”
Brady shook his head. “I wouldn’t say months. More like hours.”
“Hours? And you’re going to marry her? I would have thought you’d learn from my mistakes. Look what a hasty marriage did to me.”
“It’s not the same thing,” Brady denied. “Dana’s nothing like Beverly, nothing at all. It’s true I don’t love her, but she knows what she’s getting into. She wants to help the kids. When I get settled, we’ll annul the marriage.”
“This is a bad idea.”
“Would you rather see the kids in a foster home, split up? I can’t do that to them.” Brady stood up. “I didn’t come to get your blessing. I just came to tell you about Bev and to let you know that the girls are going to be okay.”
“Staying with strangers?”
“They’d be staying with strangers anyway. Hell, if you got out, you’d be a stranger to them.” Brady immediately wanted to take back the words. “Sorry. I didn’t have to say that.”
Carson shrugged. “You’re right. Bev promised to bring the kids by, but she rarely did.”
The brothers stared at each other.
Finally Brady sat down again. “I know it seems weird, but I needed to have some way of not just protecting these girls, but to provide for them as well.”
Carson was silent, then seemed to decide something. “Brady, I’m not guilty.” It was a bald statement from a man who no longer had time for tact or finesse.
Brady sighed. This was exactly the conversation he didn’t want to get into. “Carson, I don’t want to hear it. Right now, you’ve done five of fifteen, I’m sure your lawyer has told you that you can be out in a couple of years.”
“Then what?” Carson asked. His voice was urgent. “Are you going to give me back my girls? Or by then will you have full custody?”
Brady didn’t want to think that far ahead. He just wanted the girls to have a clean, safe place to live.
“That will have to be figured out later. Karen, Jean and Ollie need a real family, not—”
“Their father? A felon.”
It took Brady a long time to answer, but he looked directly into his brother’s eyes and said, “Yes.”
“No.” Carson’s voice was fierce. “These girls need me. They need their father. I agree that you and this woman should have temporary custody. But remember, they’re my girls. I did not do anything wrong. I did not launder money. I did not embezzle from my clients. I did not fix my books. But somehow, I still went straight to jail. Don’t you think that’s kind of funny, given that my brother is a cop?”
Brady felt the blood rush to his head. He leaned over the table, his voice low. “My being a cop doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that your computer contained all the evidence they needed to convict you.”
“This doesn’t have anything to do with that,” Carson said flatly.
“What do you mean?”
“This has to do with Mom.”
“This has nothing to do with Mom.”
“You’ve never forgiven me for not seeing her at the end.”
If Brady was totally honest with himself, he’d admit that Carson’s last words were true. But that didn’t change what Carson had done. Getting up, he strode over to the door and rapped on it. The guard’s head appeared in the window. Brady i
ndicated that he wanted to leave.
“Don’t you think that I haven’t regretted that whole period of my life?” Carson asked. “Brady, I didn’t do it. And if you wanted to, you could help me.”
Brady pretended he didn’t hear Carson’s plea and walked out. He’d done his job. It was all he’d come for.
CHAPTER SEVEN
WHILE BRADY VISITED HIS brother, Dana washed the girls’ clothes. Even though it seemed as if she’d hardly slept, she was filled with an energy that was almost manic. The younger girls had tried to help her, but their attention spans were short. Mostly they bounced from room to room, Ollie chattering nonstop, Jean following behind.
Karen had gone right back to bed after break fast and hadn’t come out since. It was late afternoon when Dana went in to check on her again, only to find her wide awake, staring at the ceiling. Without a word, Dana sat on the bed and ran a gentle hand down Karen’s cheek. Karen didn’t even acknowledge her presence. Dana just sat there for a long time, brushing back the girl’s fine hair. “Miss Ritchie?” Karen finally spoke.
“Yes?”
“Was my mom a bad person?” Her voice was worried. “Does that mean she won’t get to go to heaven?”
Dana wasn’t sure how to answer that. Part of her did think Bev was a horrible person—how else could her treatment of the children be explained? “I think your mother was in a lot of pain and heaven is a place where pain is healed.”
“Oh.” Karen rolled over to her side, cradling her head with an arm. “Miss Ritchie?”
“Yes.”
“Is it okay to miss her?”
Dana nodded, considering the earnest face. “I would worry about you if you didn’t miss her.”
Karen was quiet and then said, still staring straight ahead, “I didn’t like her very much, but I miss her.”
“And you’re going to miss her for a long time. That’s okay, you know. It’s also okay to be mad at her and not to like her too much.”
“She would always say she hated her life, that it was my dad’s fault first, then ours. It was because we were so bad.”
Dana quelled the burst of anger she felt. “That was her pain talking. She loved you very much. What happened to her has nothing to do with you. You and your sisters are very good people.”
Karen sucked in a deep breath and tears started to form in her eyes as she looked up at Dana. “Will we stay with Uncle Brady forever? Or will he leave us one day, too?”
“He really wants you to stay with him. He’s definitely going to try to see that you live happily ever after.”
“Is there really a happily-ever-after?” Karen’s voice was wistful. “It doesn’t feel like it. I don’t think I’ll be happy ever again.”
Dana brushed the girl’s hair back. “I know, sweetie. It’s going to hurt for a long time. But it will get better. Time helps.”
“Uncle Brady! Uncle Brady!” Squeals in the living room alerted them to Brady’s arrival.
Dana looked down at the girl. “Do you want to get up? Just for a little bit?”
Karen shook her head. “I’d just rather stay here.”
“I understand. But feel free to come out when you want to.”
Dana left the room, gently shutting the door behind her. She had to quell a small sense of anticipation as she walked down the hall. Brady gave her a brief smile when she entered the living room. He had Ollie on his shoulders and the little girl was screaming with delight.
“How’d it go?” Dana asked.
He shrugged. “He knows. That’s all that I went there for.”
“Oh.” Dana wanted more details, but remembered that she didn’t really know him well enough to ask for them. And his evasiveness told her he wouldn’t be forthcoming unless she did press him.
“I stopped by my apartment. Packed enough for the next few weeks.” He lifted Ollie up and over his head and put her safely to the ground. Then he held his hands out to Jean who shyly stepped into them. And when he lifted her up, her small giggle was as filled with joy as Ollie’s squeal had been.
“Do you want me to get your bags?” Dana offered.
“No. I’ve got them.” He started in the direction of the door with Jean perched on his shoulders grabbing handfuls of his hair and Ollie skipping next to him. Dana watched from the front door as he put Jean down and pulled two duffel bags from the bed of his truck. Jean and Ollie, in a joint effort, grabbed one and proceeded to drag it toward the house. Dana smiled as the bag bumped against every uneven part of the pavement.
“I hope you don’t have anything fragile in there,” she commented as he walked in.
He looked over his shoulder, and Dana saw his lips tilt up in a smile. “Not anymore. The corner still okay for my stuff?”
Dana nodded. While he’d been gone, Dana had emptied out a spare dresser that had held linen and moved it to the corner for Brady’s use. As Jean and Ollie finally managed to get themselves and the bag into the house, their laughter filling every corner, Dana realized how empty the house had been before. Or maybe she had been empty. Having the girls around didn’t hurt the way she thought it would. But, she reminded herself, it wasn’t the loving that hurt, it was the letting go.
AFTER THE GIRLS had gone to bed, Dana finally remembered she had school in the morning. She’d done nothing all weekend. She hadn’t graded any of her students’ work, she hadn’t planned any of the assignments. She hadn’t even stepped foot in the school.
Brady sat in front of the television, channel surfing. “Don’t let me bother you,” he said. “Just do what you would normally do.”
Dana laughed. “You mean lesson plans and grading?”
“Yes, that.” He lowered the volume on the television, presumably so it wouldn’t disturb her.
Dana sat down and pulled out her assignment book. Funny, she couldn’t even remember where they’d finished on Friday. Had that much time passed? A half hour later Dana put her papers down after realizing she’d been reading the same thing over and over again. She surreptitiously positioned herself to look at Brady. He was slouched, his neck resting on the back of the sofa, his stocking feet propped on the old coffee table. He looked asleep.
But then he glanced over his shoulder. Dana ducked her head. A minute passed and she ventured to look up again. He was staring at her.
“You okay?” she asked.
“Yes.”
“Can I help you?” She sat up straighter and then stretched before walking over to the couch. After all, he was going to be her husband. She should feel comfortable enough to sit in the same room with him. “Anything interesting on?”
He shrugged. “Not really.”
“Was it hard to see Carson?” Dana didn’t know what had made her ask. She knew he didn’t want to talk about it. For a minute, she didn’t think he was going to answer her.
Finally, he said, “It’s the first time I’ve seen Carson since he went in.”
“Your decision or his?”
“A little of both. More mine than his.” Brady looked at her. “He told me that he didn’t do it.”
“What do you think?”
Brady sighed and shook his head. “It was so long ago, I’m not sure what I think. I didn’t want to believe it at first. I thought it was a big mistake. A good friend of mine was on the task force that was investigating a company that was one of Carson’s main clients. We knew the company was shady, but we didn’t know how. After they got the search warrant, they carried out all the computers. They took those computers apart.”
He gave a small laugh. “One thing I learned about computers is that they save everything, even stuff you delete. You just need to know how to retrieve the information. Most of them were clean, but there was one that held proof of doctored accounting.”
“Implicating Carson?”
Brady nodded. “He always said he didn’t do it. But computers don’t lie. He’s a criminal. He deserves what he gets.”
“But he’s your brother.” Dana couldn’t help it. �
��Didn’t you listen to his side of the story?”
“He’s an adult. He didn’t need my help.”
“Are you so sure about that?”
He stared off into the middle distance. Finally, he met her eyes and Dana was struck by the pain she saw. “Yes. I am sure about that.”
“Are you sure he did it?”
“He took a plea. Even his lawyer didn’t think he had a very good case. So he went to jail.”
“Just like that?” Dana was surprised.
“Just like that. Bev was pregnant with Ollie at the time. She divorced him six months later.” He spoke mechanically as if speaking with emotion would make his part in the girls’ neglect that much more heinous.
“Do guilty people do that?”
“What?”
“Plead guilty.” She frowned.
“What do you mean?” Brady sat up.
“It seems as if the people who are guilty always plead not guilty and get really good lawyers who get them off.”
“What are you saying?”
“Nothing. I don’t know anything about your brother’s case. All I know is that it seems strange for him to take a plea.”
“You obviously haven’t been around the justice system much. People plea-bargain all the time. After all, it’s a lesser sentence. He’s doing fifteen instead of twenty or thirty.”
“But he’s given up his whole life.”
“Dana, he’s a criminal. That’s what happens to criminals who get caught. Don’t believe him just because you want to.”
She shook her head. “No. I mean, could he be protecting someone? He could have pled guilty rather than—”
“Impossible.” Brady turned away from her. “Dana, I understand your need to see the good in everything. But in this case, put your sympathy toward the girls. Carson embezzled and got caught. He was getting generous kickbacks for laundering money through the company and it wasn’t enough, so he started to alter the books.”
“But why? Didn’t you say he was successful? Why would he risk everything?”