The Inner Struggle: Beginnings Series Book 7

by Jacqueline Druga

  “I need to speak to Ellen.”

  Henry motioned his hand to Ellen who was on the couch.

  “El.” Dean walked to her.

  “Though Henry is now a traitor and letting you in, I just want to let you know you’re not welcome here.”

  “El, listen.” He sat down on the couch. He held a small green canvass bag.

  “How’s Jason working out? He and his shaking hands,” she said with sarcasm.

  “El,” Dean tried to talk.

  “I hope he smokes you out.” She folded her arms.

  “El, shut up and listen,” Dean scolded.

  “Henry!” Ellen gasped. “Don’t let him talk to me like that.”

  “Dean.” Henry moved to the couch. “Be nice.”

  Dean held up his hand and calmed himself. “You’re pissing me off, Ellen, this is important and I wanted to be the one to come to you.” He handed her the green bag. “Jason and I . . .” He paused when he heard her tsk. “Jason and I opened the crate Robbie sent. This was in it for you.”

  Ellen looked oddly at the green bag. “This?”

  “Yes.” Dean handed her a folded note. “This note was pinned to the bag.”

  Ellen took the note reading it out loud. “Ellen, I really wanted you to have this stuff now. I really did. I guess all of it is my way to let you know you are always on my mind, no matter what. I miss you El. I love you. Robbie.” Ellen set the note down. “I don’t like the tone.” She unzipped the bag. It was filled with small items. “What is this?”

  “As near as I can tell, it’s all the things he picked you up while he was out there running around.” Dean reached his hand in. “The nail polish gave it away. He always gets you that.”

  “But why?” Ellen took the bottle from Dean’s hand, as she did her eyes caught his. “Why, Dean?”

  Dean swallowed harshly. “El.” He took his eyes from Ellen’s only to look up at Henry who stood behind the couch. “I wanted to be the one to tell you this.”

  “Tell me what?” Her voice took on concern as she saw his hesitation and his shifting eyes. “Quit stalling. What is it?”

  Dean’s jaw twitched as he reached into his back pocket and pulled out a sheet up paper rolled up. “El, I’m sorry.” He handed it to her. “Read this.”

  Slowly Ellen took the paper and unrolled it. “Robbie’s report.” The second her eyes laid upon it reading it, her hands began to shake and her heart dropped. “Oh my God.”

  ROBBIE’S REPORT

  Date: JULY 15

  Patients Name: Robbie Slagel

  Date of first symptoms: July 15th Time of Onset: 9:15 a.m.

  Body Temp: 104 Headache: Yes Swollen Glands: Yes

  Appearance of skin: Pale Touch of skin: Dry, hot

  Is patient conscious? Yes Is patient alert? Yes

  Any discoloring of skin? Some Describe: purple under eyes

  Blistering of skin? No Body cavity bleeding: No

  Convulsions: No Nausea: Yes Congestion: None

  Vomiting: No Dizziness: Yes Can patient talk: yes

  NOTES:

  Dean, I’m sorry. I thought I was careful, I guess I wasn’t. I’ll try to keep these reports going but I don’t know for how long. I don’t know how much I can do or how much longer I can help my men. They’re bad now Dean, and, I’ll be like them before long. Good luck, we kept it out. Huh? Robbie

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  A hush took over the filled social hall as Joe stepped before every single adult in Beginnings that night. It was quiet, a few sniffles were heard. Not a child was present; it wasn’t good for them to be there. All of the children at that moment were in the care of Denny, Josh, and the only teenage girl in the community. A lot for them to handle, but Joe would join them soon at the school. Andrea and he were removing themselves from the meeting. Joe would go, but not without saying what he had to say first.

  “I want to uh . . . thank you all for showing up here on such short notice. We won’t keep you long. I’m sure you’ve heard through the gossip what this meeting is about. So I don’t have to tell you. Just so all of you know, this is not a council decision, it is a community decision. All of you live, work, and raise your families here and that is why it is in your hands. As a leader of the community, I have to follow what the people I lead want. If I didn’t do what was in their best interest, that wouldn’t make me much of a leader. This decision you will make tonight, is yours. I know council takes your opinion on issues, and votes accordingly but not this time. This is much more than whether or not distribution should be open later on Thursdays. This is life or death. This . . . is your decision. In all fairness, because of why we asked you here, not only council, but the remaining originals as well will not vote on this. There is too much of a personal stake in it. Andrea and I are leaving.” He motioned his hand to Andrea. “We trust you’ll make the decision you see fit for the place you live. We hold no grudges on any decision that is made. And I, as head council assure you we will uphold what you decide. Because of the nature of this vote, majority will not rule. It must be unanimous for or we go against. Henry will be here to legitimize the vote. Andrea.”

  Andrea stood up sadly and took Joe’s hand. Led out, she stopped through the aisle of chairs. “Just let me say something to you all before you make a decision. Listen to Dean. Look into your hearts and before you refuse to raise your hand, ask yourself why you are here in the first place. In Beginnings.” Gripping her other hand over Joe’s as well, she walked out of the social hall with him.

  All eyes looked at Dean as he slowly stood from his folding chair. He was nervous and his insides shook. He knew what he wanted to say and he was wishing at that moment that he had written it all down, because a part of him was drawing a blank. “As a scientist I think the best way to say this to you all is to be factual. So, I think that’s how I’ll have to be.” He looked down at the floor then back up to the faces. “Nearly three weeks ago, fourteen of our men plus two survivors that they had picked up were exposed to a virus. All of you know this. It was a general consensus that they not be permitted into Beginnings with this virus for fear of it. Understandable. That’s sixteen men. Where would we keep them with a virus we knew nothing about? Right?” Dean shrugged. “I know for a fact, that we would need more care givers then we could quarantine. Because of that, the chance of the virus spreading, no matter how careful, increased. So they did not come in. They stayed outside our walls, ten miles or so away with this virus. Let me tell you about this virus. It hits the immune and digestive systems both. Total body breakdown within two weeks of exposure. It is not airborne like the plague that wiped out our world. It is a blood borne pathogen spread through contact. It isn’t as easy to catch as the common cold, but it’s deadly. I’m not gonna kid you. How you catch it is to come in close contact with an infected individual. Sharing a glass, a kiss, touching this person too much without washing your hands afterward. Coming in contact with any and all body secretions. Blood borne.” Dean talked slowly as he paced about. “We’ve worked with this virus, Ellen and I, for months. This is the same virus that we are trying right now to stop from invading us in our future. There is only two ways to stop this future virus. One is to send our men out to stop those who will release it on us. Or two, cure it. We’re not close, we need to be close. We need to know if what we have is working or failing. Because of our search for the cure we have a basis for what we ask you. Sixteen men came down with the virus. As of two hours ago, five men remain. All of which are ill. We can contain five men, safely and assuredly without any risk to any of you of exposure. I’m not gonna lie to you, one of those men is Robbie. Robbie is an original and to us originals, he is our brother. I want him in this community and I want the other four with him . . . in this community. Besides the fact that we can learn from them, we can try to beat this thing through them. There are so few of them left, safety can no longer be an issue for bringing them in. Let’s open our gate to them, let’s bring them home.”

  Pe
te, one of the survivors stood up. “How can you say for certain that Robbie and his men aren’t the ones that started the plague in the future?”

  “I can’t,” Dean answered.

  “Then how can you justify asking us to let them in? It isn’t safe.”

  “It is safe,” Dean told him. “I can stake my life on it. I know. For months Ellen and I have been working with this. Have any of you gotten ill? How about the other viruses I work on? We practice safe handling and I can tell you we are a hundred times more cautious then what they were in the old world.”

  “Excuse me Dr. Hayes,” Pete continued, “but this is bull shit. This has nothing to do with science, does it? This has everything to do with Robbie Slagel.”

  Before Dean could comment, Ellen did. She had been standing off to the side with Frank and she stepped forward. “It does. At least for me it does. It’s no holds-barred here. I want Robbie in this community. That is why I am here. That is my soul purpose for trying to get all of you to raise your hands to let him and the others in.”

  She was a silent woman, never saying much, but Sara wanted to speak her peace. “You don’t care about the others do you, Ellen?”

  “To be honest, caring about Robbie has nothing to do with it. Robbie has a virus that can kill him. If he dies, he of all people doesn’t deserve to die outside of his home.”

  “And the others did,” Sara said. “I lost one of my partners to this virus out there. He didn’t deserve to die outside his home either. What makes Robbie Slagel so special that we should take a chance and let him in?”

  “What?” Ellen shook her head with shock at her. “How can you, of all people ask that, Sara? You, Pete, every single one of you have a home because of Robbie. I know what all of you were like when you arrived. I worked with you. I saw first-hand and I knew what you lived like out there. Food? Did you have it at your beck and call? Medical attention. Clothes on your back. Heat when the weather got bitter? No. And I don’t want to hear it, because most of you, plain and simple and cold, waited outside, in that world, for it to be handed back to you. Well it wasn’t gonna be handed to you. You learned you have to work for it. And by God, all of you work for it, all of us. But let it be known, when it came to you, those who came to Beginnings after we built it, Robbie worked a little harder for you than any of us. He let you in. He fought for you, and taught you how to live in a civilized world again. For a lot of you, you wouldn’t still be here if it wasn’t for Robbie. You’d be starving or dead outside and that’s the harsh truth. Take it.” Ellen held her head up. “Pete, you’re arguing. You were one of the biggest trouble makers we had come into containment. Who didn’t you fight with in there? You showed such violent tendencies that even the survivors in there wanted you out. What happened? Robbie fought for you, he worked with you. Why? He liked you. He saw something in you no one else saw. And he was right. Sara, you have attitude about it. Why? You had reason to be thrown out also. You stabbed Robbie remember? During a social skills class when you first got here, you stabbed him when he looked over your shoulder at what you were cutting. I remember him fighting with council over it, telling them about what you went through before you came here and to give you one more chance. They did. Here you are.” Ellen stared about the faces of the survivors in the room. “I took a poll of the originals. We stood unanimous in our vote to let Robbie back in. I’m asking all of you, every one of you, to take the same stand. It’s only right. It’s Robbie. Robbie.” She said his name with passion. “You know him well. If you let him die outside of these walls then trust me it is a sin on all of you for turning your backs on the man who helped you the most in here. I’m not Joe. Trust me, I’m not Joe. I do hold grudges. Raise your hands, all of you. Cole, Ben, Dan, they will. The rest of you should too.” Knowing there was no more to be said Ellen began to walk back to Frank. She ignored Dean’s reaching hand and walked straight into Frank’s arms that extended to her the moment she met him.

  Frank held her tight whispering close to her ear. “No matter what, know that you did good up there. You tried better than anyone.”

  Ellen closed her eyes and buried her head in his chest.

  Henry stood up “I . . . I need a show of hands. Please raise them of you think we should let Robbie and the others in.”

  Ellen didn’t want to look, but she knew by the loosening of Frank’s grip and the soft spoken, ‘no, please’ he mumbled, that things were not good. She pulled from the embrace and looked around at the room. Aside from Cole, Dan, and Ben only about twenty others raised their hands up. “No.” Ellen looked at them. She heard Henry get ready to speak, she spun to him. “No Henry, don’t finalize it.”

  “El.” Henry threw his hands up. “The vote was cast.”

  “No.” She shook her head. “Raise your hands!” She shouted to them. “Now!”

  Frank reached forward to pull back an upset Ellen. “El, come on.”

  “No.” She swatted away his hand. “Dan, Ben, Cole and the rest of you who said ‘yes’. Thank you. Thank you so much for that. But the rest of you . . .” In her anger she spat fire through her eyes at them. “The rest of you who failed to raise your hands, you better lower your heads, because you just delivered a slap in the face to us originals. If this plague does end up crossing our soil, I hope to God I personally watch each and every one of you suffer.”

  “El!” With a scold, Frank said her name as she stormed quickly by him from the social hall. She slammed her little body past and into everyone she moved by on her loud and known exit. He took a second to take a breath and then he followed her out. “Ellen!” He called to her as she moved up the street. “El.” He caught up to her.

  “Leave me alone, Frank.”

  “No. Look, the vote didn’t go your way. I’m crushed too, but talking like that isn’t going to help.”

  “I don’t give shit, Frank.”

  “Well give a shit, El. We live with these people. We stand with these people and we’re gonna have to fight our enemy side by side with these people.”

  “It’s Robbie, Frank.”

  “I know it’s Robbie.” His hand rested on her face. “He’s my brother El. My heart is broken. But don’t think for one second Robbie wouldn’t vote no to keep him out. He would. If he thought there was a chance, no matter how small, that what he had could spread, he wouldn’t want in. I know him.”

  “I do too. And that’s why I want him back home.” Ellen turned her back and continued her march off.

  “El.”

  “Just leave me alone Frank.” Her voice faded as she moved down the street. “Just leave me alone.”

  <><><><>

  Henry watched the drink in Frank’s hand more then he paid attention to anything else. He watched as the glass would empty and then refill. How many times? How many drinks? He looked at his watch when he heard the knock at Frank’s front door. He hesitated getting up when he saw Frank reach for the bottle again. Though he had seen Frank drink before, this was the first time he really saw that he was drinking heavily. “I’ll get it.” Henry moved to the door and away from a silent Frank. “Dean?” Henry said his name in surprise when he opened it.

  “Hi Henry.” Dean walked in. “Can I speak to Ellen?”

  Quickly, Henry looked back at Frank who stood up. “She’s not here, Dean. She said she went to find you.”

  Curiously Dean looked around. “I’ve been home. How long ago did she leave here?”

  Henry checked the time again. “Half hour. Shit.”

  Frank walked over to them. “I’ll find her.”

  “Frank,” Dean stopped him. “Do you mind if I do? I think I know where she probably went to look for me.”

  “Dean.” Frank sounded ready to argue. “I think I should . . .”

  “Come on,” Dean spoke with reason. “If she’s not there, I promise I’ll radio you. O.K.? But I’m certain she is there.”

  Frank, who had his hand raised in an argument mode, lowered it. “Radio me. I mean it!” He pointed and
stepped back to sit on the couch.

  “Thanks.” Dean watched him then turned to Henry. “I’ll let you guys know.”

  Henry held the door open for Dean as he left. After shutting it he saw Frank get up. “Where you going?”

  “Following him.”

  “Frank, no.” Henry stopped him. “You’ve been drinking heavily. Don’t. O.K.? Besides the fact that you get mad easier when you drink, Ellen will kill you.”

  “I want to know if she’s O.K. Henry. And I’m not drunk.”

  “I know you’re not. But you’re upset, and she’s upset. I don’t want you upset with each other,” Henry reasoned. “Just wait here. I’ll . . . I’ll follow Dean.”

  “All right.” Frank’s shoulders dropped and he walked over and plopped on the couch. “Let me know as soon as possible. Please.”

  “I will.” Henry walked to the door he paused before he left. “Frank, are you all right to be alone with the baby if he needs you?”

  “I’m fine.” Frank brought his drink to his lips. “Just go.”

  Wondering if he should, Henry justified leaving to the fact he wouldn’t be gone long. He hesitated just once more and then he left to catch up to Dean who was well down the street ahead of him.

  <><><><>

  Ellen was exactly where he thought she’d be. Only she wasn’t doing what Dean thought she would be doing--looking for him. She scurried so fast around the mobile lab, she didn’t even notice she left the door open. She had a small duffel bag, it was laid open on the counter and she’d walk to it, drop something and then move to another part in the lab. “What are you doing Ellen?

  Ellen jumped when she heard the startle of Dean’s voice. “I’m busy.”

  “You’re packing up meds. What are you doing?” Dean walked into the lab.

  “I’m leaving.”

  “Beginnings?”

  “Yep.” She stated and returned to get another vial. “I’ll be back, but I won’t be back until I make Robbie well.