Contents
A note from the author
BOOK 1: The Date
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
BOOK 2: The Girlfriend
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
BOOK 3: The Fiancée
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
BOOK 4: The Wife
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Preview: Sammy in France (Single Wide Female Travels, Book 1)
Introducing A Fun Cozy Mystery Series
Other Titles
Legal Notice
Dear Reader,
The Single Wide Female and B.I.G. Girls Club books are written for every woman out there who has struggled with their weight, self-esteem and any number of issues that we all face as we work to become the best versions of ourselves that we can be.
They are meant to be light-hearted and fun, but I do hope that they will inspire you—to REALLY live your life to the fullest, loving yourself completely as you do so.
You might prefer to get to know Sammy in the Single Wide Female: The Bucket List series first. You can pick up that first book for free here:
1 Learn Pole Dancing
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00R334AE4
And…
I have a FREE book for you!
Wanna know what inspired Sammy to write her bucket list? Visit my website below and get your complimentary copy of “Sammy’s Big Plan!”
LilliannaBlake.com
Enjoy!
Sincerely,
Lillianna
Single Wide Female in Love
(Book 1)
The Date
By
Lillianna Blake
Copyright © 2015 Lillianna Blake
Cover design by Beetiful Book Covers
All rights reserved.
LilliannaBlake.com
Chapter 1
“I’ve never been so in love.”
“Looking into your eyes is like looking into the heavens.”
“Oh, you’re so sweet!”
“It’s true!”
I chugged down the remainder of my wine. After eavesdropping on the couple at the next table, I felt even more uncomfortable sitting alone at my own. Max had invited me to dinner, but he was late.
To distract myself, I reached into my purse and pulled out a folded piece of paper. I glanced around to be sure no one was paying attention before unfolding it—although it really wasn’t a huge secret as I’d been blogging about my list for months now.
My life had been turned upside down—and not in a bad way—the moment I’d decided to create a bucket list. It was a list of things I longed to experience but hadn’t because of my weight. It inspired me to remain focused on my weight loss as I checked off each item.
I needed that inspiration again. As I read over the list, my eyes lingered on a smudged spot where an item was erased.
Kiss Max
I remembered writing it. I also remembered erasing it. Max and I were best friends. That was all we would ever be, no matter how madly in love I was with him. I needed to find a way to accept that. So I’d erased the item from my list.
As I sat in the crowded restaurant filled with people who all appeared to be in love, I made another decision. It was my bucket list, and if I wanted Max to be on it, then he would be. I pulled a pencil out of my purse and scribbled the item back on the list, smiling as I did so.
Kiss Max
I doodled a little set of kissy lips beside the note. Maybe Max would never love me the way I loved him, but that didn’t mean we couldn’t share one single amazing mind-blowing over-the-moon heart-melting kiss!
“Hi, beautiful.”
His touch on my shoulder made me jump out of my chair. I grabbed the paper so fast that I knocked over my wine glass. Luckily, it was already empty. Max set the glass upright and laughed as he sat down across from me. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you, Sammy.”
“It’s okay. I guess I was just lost in my thoughts.”
“What were you thinking about?” He gazed across the table at me.
I ducked my head to hide the heat in my cheeks.
“Oh, just what to order for dessert.”
I eyed the dessert cart as it rolled past. I had to wonder who ever thought up the idea of the cart. How was it deemed a good idea to pile a cart up with every delicious dessert in the restaurant and then roll it tauntingly past the patrons? I found it hard to believe that there was a single person in the restaurant who did not want to devour the entire thing. I knew for certain that I did.
“Sammy?”
I forced my eyes away from the decadent desserts and settled them on something just as tempting. Max. He looked even more handsome than usual in a suit jacket and tie.
“Hm?”
“I asked how the book was coming?”
“Oh, no. We don’t talk about that at the table.” I picked up my glass of water and took a sip to mask an anxious grimace. Ever since I’d decided to become a writer full-time, my progress was asked about by everyone.
Max laughed. “Okay, sorry. I just thought maybe that’s why you’re so quiet tonight.”
“Am I quiet?”
“Yes. If there’s one thing I can always count on with you, it’s a good conversation. But you seem a little distracted.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I just want in on what’s going on in that creative mind of yours.”
For just a moment I was distracted by creative thoughts about Max. Max without his shirt on, Max with those perfect lips headed for mine, Max…
“No!”
I winced as I realized from Max’s stunned expression that I’d spoken out loud.
“Okay. You don’t have to tell me.” He furrowed a brow and looked down at his food.
I took a breath and tried to focus. My new goal in life was not to want the things I couldn’t have. Max was something I could never have. Maybe a single kiss, but certainly not a lifetime.
“What I meant was that you don’t really want to know.” I did my best to laugh off my behavior.
“Sure I do.” Max met my eyes. “Out with it. Sammy.”
I smiled. It warmed my heart to have a friend like Max who knew just how to get the truth out of me.
“Alright, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“I can handle it.”
“I’ve decided that I’m going to fall in love.”
“Oh?” Max stared at me. His lips twitched at the corners.
I thought he was going to laugh. Instead he picked up his drink.
“Yes. It’s been long enough. It’s time that I experience true love.” I watched as he set his glass back down without taking a sip.
“Do you have anyone in mind? Taking things to the next level with Greg?”
I shook my head. I’d really tried to make things work with Greg, the guy that I’d been seeing for awhile, but at the end of the day, I couldn’t kid myself. The spark just wasn’t there, and I wanted the spark. I turned my thoughts back to Max’s question. “No, things aren’t going to work out with Greg, but—well, there is one person.”
“Ah, that guy—what’s his name? Green or fuchsia or something?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Blue.” I laughed. Max had a sparkle in his eyes as he teased me. “Actually, his name is Matt.”
“Matt.” Max shook his head. “So how do you propose to make yourself fall in love with Matt?”
“I don’t have to make myself.” My lips curved into a dreamy smile. “That part is easy. I just have to make him fall in love with me.”
Max reached across the table and took my hand. “Anyone would fall in love with you, Sammy.”
Anyone but you.
For a moment I wondered if I’d actually made the statement out loud.
Chapter 2
Max let go of my hand and sat back in his chair.
“Thanks, Max. But I don’t think it’s that simple. I mean, I don’t want to wait anymore. Either he falls in love with me, or I find someone else to fall in love with. I’m ready now. I want that next stage in my life. I write about romance, but how can I write about true love if I’ve never experienced it?”
“I think it’s great that you want to be in love. But it’s not something that can be forced, is it? It has to be with the right person.”
“I agree. How can I ever meet the right person if I’m pinning my hopes on the wrong one?”
I glanced over at a couple seated not far from us. They looked just like Max and me. Both engaged in conversation. Both too occupied to eat their food. Both smiling and laughing. But the other couple wore wedding rings. I loved Max. I valued him as my best friend and the most important person in my life. But I wanted more than a good conversation. I wanted a conversation that didn’t end.
“Give him a chance.”
I looked back at Max and realized I had missed most of what he said.
“Who?”
“Blue.”
“I’m going to. But I’m not going to wait forever. Either he’s ready, or he’s not.” I heard the determination in my own voice. It was nice to be so set on a decision. In the past I’d let the desires of others dictate my choices. Now I was ready to make my own decisions based on my needs.
“And if he’s not?”
“Then he’s not the right person. I am not going to be strung along.” I picked at the last of my food. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the past few months it’s that if I don’t make something happen it’s not going to happen. As long as I sit here waiting for love, love isn’t going to show up. I need to get out there and find it. If it’s not with Blue, then it’s not.”
“I’m surprised by that. If you feel so strongly for this person, why won’t you be patient?”
Max’s tone was a little cross. I looked up at him.
“How patient can I be?” I raised an eyebrow. “He’s had plenty of time to make a move—to make it clear to me that he cares for me the way I care for him. Is this some kind of male pride thing—to see how long a woman will twirl in the wind waiting?”
“That’s not fair.” Max grinned. “Though it is a funny image. I just mean, maybe he has a good reason. Maybe he’s shy.”
“Fine, I get that. I’ve been shy. I’ve wanted to hide from the world and never be seen for fear of being judged. But, if he can’t see that I accept him no matter what, then we don’t have the kind of connection that I thought we did.”
“So you’d give up on him?”
“Whose side are you on?” I laughed.
“Sorry. I guess I just haven’t heard you talk about someone like this before. So tell me more about this guy. What is it that you like so much about him?” Max turned his attention to his food.
I considered the question. I hadn’t made a list of all of the things I liked about Blue. I just knew that I did.
“He gets me.” I shrugged. “He’s so supportive and understanding. He likes the way that I think and I like the way that he thinks.”
“But you have no idea what he looks like. He could be anyone.”
“Sure. But does it really matter how someone looks? I could be sitting across from the most beautiful man I’ve ever laid eyes on, but that doesn’t mean he’s the one for me.” I did my best to hide the truth in my words. “I think that attraction doesn’t matter as much as connection. Have you ever considered that you could connect with someone that you weren’t necessarily attracted to?”
“Of course.” He took a bite of his food.
It seemed to me that it was a well-planned bite to avoid saying more.
“Well, with Blue it honestly won’t matter to me what he looks like. As long as he is the person that I’ve gotten to know over the past few months, I will be overjoyed to meet him.”
“You can’t know that until you meet him.”
“Okay, fine, but I’m going to meet him, so that won’t be an issue anymore.”
Max set down his fork and looked across the table at me. “I just want you to be happy, Sammy.”
“I’m working on it.” I laughed. “I am happy. I’ve made so many changes in my life. My body is changing, but that’s not even the best part. My self-confidence is growing. I’m getting to know who I truly am. I thought I could go on just like this and be satisfied. But the more I grow, the more certain I am that I want to share my life with one special person. I just want the chance to experience that true passion. Sitting and waiting on the sidelines hasn’t worked so far. It’s time for me to go out there and grab it.”
Max grinned. “I guess that’s one way to make sure you get it.”
“Well, to tell you the truth, there are no guarantees. I might end up alone in the end. But at least I will know that I tried.”
“There’s one thing I can promise you.” Max looked into my eyes.
“What’s that?”
“You’re never going to be alone.”
My mind filled with thoughts of Max and me walking down the beach at sunset, Max and me cooing over baby clothes, Max and me traveling to new places together.
No! I cleared my throat. “You’re right, Max. No, I’ll never be alone.” I smiled at him.
Chapter 3
Max dropped me off at my apartment after dinner. I didn’t even look in his direction. Just when I thought my feelings for Max were purely friendship he had to go and be amazing. My determination not to lust for him faded in the warmth of his eyes. So I didn’t look.
I walked up to my door, stepped inside, and closed it behind me. I might have imagined Max chasing after me and begging me for a kiss. But only for a moment.
I shook my head to clear my thoughts. That just made me dizzy and still longing for a kiss.
Since I couldn’t seem to get romance off my mind, I decided to put it into my writing.
In my new book, romance was brewing. I sat down in front of the computer and began fiddling with what I’d already written. I focused on how I felt when I thought about Blue, Max, or even another potential mate. I did my best to integrate my emotions into the character. In many ways she reflected my own personality. It was cathartic to slip into her world and explore without consequences in my own world. I settled into the story and began typing away.
An hour slipped by. I had to get up and stretch. As I walked around my apartment I thought about love. I really thought about it. Love as a reality, not just an idea. I always thought of love as something in the distance, something in my future. I never really considered what it would be like to have it in my own life.
“Wow, here I am trying to write about love, but I have no idea what it is.”
I thought about watching some romance movies or even reading some romance. But that was all fiction. It was all imaginary. The plot line was set before the actors took the stage. It was predictable and took no one by surprise. I needed to see real love. Not what made blockbuster hits, but the kind of everyday love that made marriages span decades.
It was still fairly early in the evening, so I decided to go for a walk. Maybe if I saw love in action, I would get a better idea of what it actually was. Plus, I would get my exercise in for the day.
As I walked, I people-watched. I noticed a young couple cuddled up at the bus stop. Their arms were intertwined. Their eyes were glued on one another. It was silly, sappy love that made me smile. But would it last? Anyone could be fascinating for the first few weeks. What then?
Single Wide Female in Love Complete Bundle: Books 1-4 Page 1