This tongue...it was missing something—something that my tongue enjoyed playing with the last time we kissed. The silver barbell I’d gotten acquainted with.
Ryker smiled at me as he tried to bring my lips back to his.
“IZZY!” My fuzzy head shot to the side where Trevelin stood with his hands shoved deep in his pockets as every woman around him tried to grind their body against his, looking as if they were humping his leg. “What are you fucking doing?” His voice was clipped and irritated sounding as he shoved at the girl that was trying to nibble at his neck.
Oh God, I thought I was kissing him. As much as I liked Ryker, I wanted to be kissing my favorite Knight Raider...my Hollywood.
“Dann...I’m dancin’, Hollywood. Cooomme dance with me.” My words slurred as I crooked my finger for him to come hither, my swaying body stumbled and then slumped against Ryker’s.
“I think you’ve had enough to drink, Izzy.”
“She’s fine dude. I’ve got her,” Ryker cut in, holding me steady with his hands on my lower waist. He looked thrilled, but Trevelin didn’t. Not in the least bit.
He held a feral expression that I had yet to see. “I’m not fucking leaving here without you,” he grated with simmering eyes that leveled me in the stroboscope light. The sternness in his voice made me shiver, completely ignoring Ryker’s comment.
His hand whipped out in front of me, waiting for me to obey. I couldn’t remember what he had even said, but my drunken mind didn’t hesitate. It shoved my hand into his right before the dizziness took over, possessing my entirety to the point where I was falling, fast. I collapsed into his arms that curled around me possessively. The last I heard was Trevelin saying something to Ryker before I totally blacked out.
Chapter Twelve
Trevelin
Kissing Country full force had been on my to-do list from the moment I saw her. Fucking her until my dick was raw was something else that passed through my mind every time I looked at her. And those issues had intensified when I walked in on her in her sexy as fuck lace bra and panties. I knew she was in there, although I didn’t know she was undressed. But I took my moment and seized the opportunity. I couldn’t have walked in at a better time if I’d tried.
I took that unexpected thrill at seeing her dressed in her finest—almost fucking nothing—as a sign that it was my time to go for it. If I got slapped in the face, then oh well—I’d revel in the sting and keep trying. But she didn’t. Instead she threaded her tiny fingers through my hair and sealed her lips with mine. I had never tasted anything more divine than the sweetness of her mouth.
Then I went with what I had, to see if I could taste more, only to be shut down. She told me she was a virgin and that she didn’t want to give that up to just anyone who was looking for a one time ride. I wanted to grab her, shake some sense into her, and tell her how much I felt for her. But my cowardly ass couldn’t do it.
I’m pathetic.
I’d caved.
Wanting something I never thought I would and probably would never have.
To say I was shocked that she was still a virgin would be putting it lightly. I didn’t really know what to think of that discovery, and I wasn’t about to be stupid and ask how that could happen because I could do the damn math. It takes two. I just couldn’t understand how someone that looked like her had kept her virtue for twenty-one years.
It had to be a hard struggle for her to keep it intact. I’d seen firsthand how all the men at Buck’s were fucking her with their eyes every chance they got, and no doubt they would conquer the actual task if given the opportunity. And now I could throw Ryker Steele in the mix of men wanting to taste what I wanted to claim as mine.
I didn’t give a fuck that she was a virgin. Actually, it made me want her even more. It confirmed that what I’d thought about her all along, about her being real, was true. Untainted was what she was. Not some horny chick trying to lay a good fuck with a rock star. She wasn’t some sleazy bitch trying to get money off one of us. She was a sweet, innocent angel just like I thought she was—or so I’d thought.
I couldn’t stand the fact she had left with Ryker, and I was beyond pissed when she said she was going to go to some club with his ass. I hated the anger and defeat I felt knowing she was going to be with him. I hated the welling emotions that continuously coursed through me whenever I thought of her. And after tasting her soft, sweet lips, there was no turning back.
I had paced the length of the Knight Slayer for what felt like hours, trying to talk myself out of going to her, hearing the screams of some groupie Reed had brought back to his bunk. Tuning them out was damn near impossible.
Call me the selfish bastard that I was, but I didn’t want to give Country the opportunity to get to know Ryker. I had nothing against the dude, and from the times I had been around him I would say he seemed to be a decent guy. I couldn’t let Country see that though. I wanted her to view me as the good guy. Lord knew she had told me that more than once, and I needed her to keep thinking it. I needed her, period.
She gave me hope. She made me believe that I was worth something. That I wasn’t some unwanted piece of shit tossed aside, that I wasn’t a waste of human air. My whole life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to make a name for myself so I wouldn’t feel completely alone and worthless, but even after the Knight Raiders hit it big that feeling never went away.
It never got better.
I still had no family.
Yeah, I got the guys and tons of people screaming my name and how much they loved me. But my fans’ love wasn’t real. Not the kind I didn’t know I hungered for. The fans didn’t know the real me. They didn’t know who I was or where I came from, and they sure as hell didn’t love me. They loved my music. That’s it.
Country did though. She knew more than anyone besides the guys, Kelly, and a friend I hadn’t spoken to in months. Country knew to an extent how I had to grow up, that I was alone and had no one. To be honest, I’d never wanted anyone in return. I just wanted to play my music, tour the world, get as far away from Chicago as possible, and start a new life for myself.
Alone.
But now that new life had me wanting Isabel Morgan. Uncontrollably so. But after seeing her shove her tongue into Ryker’s cock-sucking mouth, I didn’t know what to think anymore.
My teeth gritted thinking about it.
I wanted to throw down right there. I’d never wanted to ram someone as bad as I’d wanted to break his damn jaw. He had his lips pressed to the same innocent angel’s mouth that I had worshipped only hours before. I hated jealousy, never really considered myself a jealous person until then.
She was my little piece of country heaven, and I be damned if he stole it from me. Maybe I came off as controlling, but I wasn’t about to leave her there.
I was happy as fuck when she didn’t protest and came straight to me willingly.
If she hadn’t consented? Tough shit, I would’ve simply thrown her over my damn shoulder and left with her whether she liked it or not.
She was drunk. I could tell by looking into her glazed, bloodshot eyes that were normally the purest, crystal blue. However, I didn’t know how drunk she was until she passed out in my arms.
I made sure to tell Ryker he better keep his fuckin’ distance and how goddamn stupid he was for letting her drink so much. You could clearly look at her with one glance and tell she wasn’t a heavy drinker and couldn’t hold her alcohol. I’d cradled her weightless body in my arms and carried her to the SUV, Big Mac stalking closely behind me. I had learned my lesson – you don’t go anywhere without your backup protection.
She slept in my lap the whole way back to the bus, and when I got her out and reached the bus steps, her tiny, little body no longer wanted to contain the alcohol it had consumed. She hurled until she dry heaved. I held her the whole time, caressing her back and made sure to keep her hair out of the way. Her pretty dress wasn’t so lucky.
When she had finished I took her inside and put
her in my bed. There was no way I was going to let her sleep by herself with the possibility of her getting sick again. I washed her face as she mumbled incoherently. The small whimpers and moans she made were fuckin’ adorable, and they also stirred things inside me because she was out cold and I didn’t know what was going on in that beautiful head of hers to cause such noises.
I wasn’t trying to sneak a peek, for I respected this girl more than anyone I’d ever met before, I just wanted her to be comfortable and out of her vomit-covered clothes. I undressed her down to her bra and panties and pulled one of my shirts over her head that smothered her tiny body. It couldn’t have been fucking hotter than if she had been in some expensive lingerie.
After getting her cleaned and dressed, I placed her under the covers. I watched her sleep for a minute, wanting so badly to believe that when she’d kissed Ryker she was so drunk that she thought it was me, but I wasn’t holding my breath. This girl had my head all tore up. She had been so open to me and not the least bit frigid. I expected her to shut me out after I had kissed her. I tried not to. I tried to rein in my urge, but it was useless. I never expected her to allow me to kiss her on stage in front of thousands. I also never expected to see her kissing Ryker fucking Steele either. I thought I was getting to her.
I groaned.
Shoving all my confusion aside, I took my eyes off her sleeping in my bed and stripped to my boxers, then got in the bed next to her. I pulled my drunken angel into my arms as I continued to watch her sleep. If there was a way to make this last forever I would try with all my power to make it happen. This beautiful, brown haired girl was consuming my every goddamn emotion.
I pressed my lips to her forehead, breathing in her fruity scent. “I want you, Country, so damn bad. You deserve way better than me, but I can’t bring myself to let you go.” I caressed her peaceful face with my thumb. “Dream about me,” I whispered against the smooth skin by her ear.
I knew I didn’t deserve her. That she was too good for me, but that was why I was never going to let her go. I would fight like hell to make her mine, and I would easily destroy anything or anyone who tried to get in my way.
♪♫♪♫♪♫
I awoke before Country the next morning, and like a creep I watched her sleep until Jace and I went to get some breakfast for everyone. The Knight Slayer was set to soon be off for our next destination...Indiana. When we returned, I went straight to the bedroom to bring Country her sugar with a little shot of coffee to find she was gone.
Fear crept into my every extremity at the thought that she realized how much she actually hated me and that maybe I’d stepped over my line as a friend by undressing her last night. Or maybe she had been awake and heard what I’d said and that freaked her the fuck out and she went back to Oklahoma.
Hell, all of those unfamiliar emotions freaked me the fuck out too, but I was just going with them, letting them lead me to a land of the unknown.
Being a little frantic like a crazy person, I subsequently noticed some of her stuff was still there. I thought it was odd for her to leave and not take all of her belongings with her.
I came to find out that while Jace and I were gone that Randy had come by and got the girls to take to L.A.. My heart froze. I was beyond glad that she didn’t just up and leave because of me, but I was also a wreck. We had no idea how long they would be gone, and I was going insane on the inside wondering how I wasn’t going to miss her or come off as a complete mopey-puss to the guys. I needed to figure out a way to win her over for good or get over her all together before my erratically beating heart killed me dead.
♪♫♪♫♪♫
It’d been two weeks since the girls had left with Randy to go to L.A. The guys and I were now in Florida, staying in a beach house by the water. We were scheduled to be here for about a week and had two performances to do at Tampa Bay Times Forum and the shoot for the Love Potion video. I knew we were going to stay at this beach house while in Tampa, and it was the place I so desperately wanted Country to see. She had been so excited about coming to the beach.
Life on the bus felt empty without her and Addie. Yeah, they were only with us a few days, but when you become dependent on something it guts you to the extreme and becomes hard to continue on as normal when it was gone. My mother was addicted to drugs, and now I was starting to think I’d become addicted to my country bliss.
I had called Randy so much to check on her—so much in fact that he told me that he was seriously considering changing his number. I’d laughed. The guy was a comedian at times. He told me he was taking good care of her and for me to focus on the rest of the tour.
How I was feeling toward this girl probably wasn’t normal, but what the hell was? I’d never felt this way before, and for someone who had been alone his whole life, I’d never felt as alone as I did without her. She had become home to me, a place I’d never had, and the fucking sucky part was she didn’t even know it.
After bugging the shit out of Randy for days, I’d finally decided to suck it up and call her myself. I was starting to feel like a huge baby, one that had lost his favorite toy. We had exchanged numbers the first night on the bus. I wanted her to be able to reach me whenever she needed me, but I told her she needed it in case she couldn’t reach Big Mac or Double-D. She had yet to call me for any reason, and I’d begun to doubt my thoughts on calling her.
“Just fuckin’ call her already, man.” Jace plopped down on the couch beside me in his swimming trunks, kicking his bare feet up on the table. “You’ve been looking at that damn phone for the past two hours.”
“I know. He’s starting to look like a loose pussy,” Reed joined in. “Just moping and hanging around, not doing anything but being a total flop. You need to get your ass out on that beach and tag one of the tight asses in a g-string,” he said with wide eyes after taking a gulp of his Red Bull. His comment on tagging a tight ass in a g-string only inclined to push me closer to the edge.
I’ve got to call her.
I looked back down at my phone. “Okay, I’ll come to the beach in a minute, right after I call Country.”
“You were supposed to do that two hours ago,” Jace reminded me.
“Yeah, well...it’s fuckin’ harder than it seems. Where’s Bryson?”
“Upstairs talking to Jade,” Reed crooned in a mushy voice. “You know, you and him are starting to act just alike. Two pussy-whipped little bitches.” He tossed his empty Red Bull can at me.
“I thought you had to be getting the pussy to actually be pussy-whipped?” Jace questioned seriously, jumping off the couch in a hurry because he knew I would’ve punched him.
“Good point, bro. So, what would that make you, Trev? A pussy-beggar?” Reed asked.
“Shut the fuck up, assholes. I’m not begging for anything.”
“Keep telling yourself that,” he scoffed. “I would have done fucked her raw and the old Trev would’ve too. Guess some of us are just losing our dickly-mojo.” His fingers snapped in front of my face.
I slapped his hand away. “I haven’t lost shit. I’m...I want it to be different with Country. I don’t want to use her. I could actually see myself in a relationship with her.”
Reed damn near choked on the new Red Bull he’d just opened and Jace looked as if someone had kicked him in the balls. “Are you fucking serious?” they both asked in unison, disdain evident on their faces.
“I’ve never been more serious about anything. But I’ve also never wanted a chick for more than a few hours either, and I don’t have a clue as to what I’m doing. I like her, but there’s also the fact that she kissed Ryker at Jolt that night I went to get her. Damn, she was fuck-ass drunk.” I said the last part as more of an afterthought.
“Ryker Steele doesn’t have shit on you, dude. I’m sure she was so drunk she didn’t realize what she was doing. We’ve been there and done that,” Reed chuckled. “I don’t know what the fuck I am talking about here, but I think you need to just put it all in, man. Tell her how you
feel and finally tap that ass.” I arched a brow at Reed, not believing what he’d said, but laughed that he threw in his normal lewdness. “What? I said I didn’t know what I was talkin’ about. Just trying to be a caring friend.”
“Now who sounds like a pussy?” I laughed.
“What the fuck ever,” he remarked, getting up. “We’re heading to the beach. Come find us when you get off the phone with Kitten. Oh, and Jade will be here tomorrow. Peace, dick lick.” He shot me a peace sign, and he and his brother walked out the glass doors, down to the beach.
I hated saying it, but Reed was right. I needed to just tell her how I felt about her. I scrolled through the contact list to the name Country and hit the call button.
It rang four times before I finally heard the voice I had been dying to hear. “Trevelin?”
“The one and only. How’s L.A. treatin’ a backwoods girl like yourself?”
She laughed. Man, I’ve missed that laugh.
“Pretty good. Thank the Lord Randy got us a driver, or we would’ve been as lost as you if you were actually stuck in the backwoods.”
“I liked being in the backwoods with you.” The line went silent for a second, and I thought I’d lost her call. “Hello, you still there?”
“Um...yeah. You weren’t ever in the backwoods, Hollywood. But I can show ya next time.”
That sounded positive. Next time. Maybe she’d been thinking about me like I had her.
“I’ll hold you to it.”
“You ride horses?”
“That would be a negative. I don’t think my balls would be up for it.”
Her giggle made me smile, and I wished she were here so I could see that beautiful face light up in person. “That’s why you wear tighter underwear and a snug pair of jeans. It helps to keep everything, um, tucked out of the way.”
Fuck, why does that sound hot? Because it’s coming from her mouth? I bet she could tuck everything out of the way!
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