by Ruff, K. S.
I tried not to laugh at the pained expression on Cenia’s face. “Refraining from sex could make your wedding night more memorable,” I opined. “I think it’s a great idea.”
Roger scowled at me before seeking sympathy from Rafael. “Help me out here, Rafael. I’m not sure I can survive the next two and a half months without sex.” He began distributing the kabobs on everyone’s plate.
Rafael heaped a spoonful of Portuguese rice onto my plate. “You might be surprised by what you’re willing to endure for the woman you love.”
Roger glanced questioningly at Rafael. “What is that supposed to mean?”
Rafael shrugged as he scooped a pile of rice onto Cenia’s plate. “I’m just saying, two and a half months without sex is nothing. Trust me. You’ll survive.”
Roger’s eyes narrowed, then widened with understanding. “You two aren’t having sex!” he exclaimed. “Now that’s a shocker.”
“Roger! That’s enough. We’re done talking about sex,” Cenia scolded. She glanced at me apologetically. “I’m sorry, Kri. I didn’t tell Roger everything that happened in Ukraine.”
Roger glanced at me. The mischievous glint in his eyes was gone. Concern now etched his ruggedly handsome face. “What did they do to you, Kri?” he inquired softly. He had completely abandoned his plate.
I couldn’t decide if I wanted to laugh or cry. I was working so hard to forget the past, but it kept creeping up on me. I took a sip of wine, stalling so I could smooth out my frayed emotions. Finally, I looked at Roger. “Don’t feel bad for ribbing us about our sex life, Roger. You couldn’t possibly have known.” My lungs deflated as I sorted through the best way to explain what the SVR had done.
Rafael squeezed my hand encouragingly. “Imagine the worst possible place someone could shove a stun gun on a woman who had been beaten, doused with water, and stripped bare.”
Roger’s shoulders fell. He glanced at Cenia. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he whispered angrily.
“I didn’t think Kri would appreciate me sharing something so… personal,” Cenia explained softly.
Roger couldn’t bring himself to look at me. Instead, he looked at Rafael. “No wonder Kadyn’s refused to discuss what happened in Ukraine. If you two are planning any sort of retaliation, I want in.”
I jumped out of my chair, suddenly panicked. “No! No one’s seeking revenge. Do you understand me? I don’t want either of you or Kadyn going to Ukraine. I can’t… I can’t lose anyone else.” I tried to slow my heart rate with deep gulping breaths, but the tears came anyway.
Rafael rose from the table and wrapped me in his arms. “You’re not going to lose me. I promise, Roger, Kadyn, and I won’t go to Ukraine.”
I buried my face in his shirt. “They killed Michael,” I cried. “He paid them, and they still killed him. They kill for no reason at all.”
“I know,” Rafael whispered soothingly.
Roger joined us. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you cry. I was just trying to get a little sex.” He sounded like a four year old boy who’d just been caught shoplifting a much coveted toy.
I lifted my head from Rafael’s chest and stared dumbfounded at Roger. Suddenly, I was laughing. “You could always try to get her drunk,” I suggested when I finally found my voice.
Rafael kissed the top of my head before returning to his chair. He tugged me onto his lap and handed me a glass of wine. “Maybe I should get you drunk,” he murmured thoughtfully.
“I do have a guest room,” Cenia noted, “and a few more bottles of wine…”
“I can’t listen to them having sex and not get any,” Roger whined. He was already back to his mischievous self.
Cenia patted his hand. “Don’t worry, honey. I’ll steal his keys so we can fool around in his car.”
Rafael and I smiled at each other knowingly. “Having sex in that car is a bit more difficult than you might think. The motorcycle was much easier,” I confessed.
Roger groaned miserably. “This is not helping.”
Rafael, Cenia, and I burst out laughing.
“Serves you right,” Cenia said as we began to eat dinner. “You might want to think twice before complaining about our sex life again.”
Chapter 4 – Heart headed home
“Do you miss the jet?” Rafael asked. He leaned across the armrest dividing our first class seats and peered down at the heavily treed mountains carving the landscape below. The airplane was already beginning its descent into Great Falls.
I stared out the window and forced myself to see the river winding through the trees. I didn’t want to see the blood soaked carpet or Michael dying in my arms, but I did every time I thought about Michael’s airplane. “No. I don’t miss the jet,” I assured him. I was relieved when Rafael sold it. The carpet had been replaced and the superficial damage from the bullet holes repaired while we were in Berlin, but neither of us felt comfortable using Michael’s airplane after the incident in Ukraine.
He pressed his lips to the back of my hand. “What are you looking at?”
I smiled. Rafael always seemed to know when I shouldn’t be left alone with my thoughts. “The Missouri River,” I replied. “Do you fish?” I turned away from the window so I could study his face… his golden skin, the hint of whiskers that darkened his masculine jawline, his strong nose, high cheekbones, and deeply captivating eyes.
His soft brown eyes sparked with amusement. “I’ve never tried fishing. Why? Do you fish?”
I laughed. “No. My grandpa tried to teach me, but I couldn’t bear to kill the worm, let alone the fish. He gave up on me when he caught me sneaking his hard earned fish back into the lake.”
Rafael’s laughter warmed me as the wheels of the plane touched down. We were both thrown forward when the pilot hit the brakes a little too hard. He was hinting at just how short the runway was. “You okay?” Rafael asked when the plane finally slowed.
I nodded. “Yes. I’m anxious to see everybody. How are you holding up?”
“I’m a little nervous,” he confessed. He glanced out at the tarmac before linking our hands together again. “I’m looking forward to meeting your family.”
“I’ll ask my dad to take you fly fishing when we visit them in Hamilton, if you’d like.” I unbuckled my seatbelt when the plane rolled up to the gate.
Rafael smiled. “I’d like that.” He released his seatbelt and pulled his backpack from the overhead compartment before helping me out of my seat.
“We’re going to be doing a lot of driving over the next few days,” I warned. We were planning to spend two days with Lexie in Great Falls, two days with Kimme and Dan in Helena, and two days with my parents in Hamilton before driving back to Great Falls for the return flight to Reagan National Airport. Everything was so spread out in Montana. The state sprawled north, south, east, and west for hundreds of miles, but the patchwork of farms, majestic canyons, and heavily treed mountains carved a scenery that more than made up for the inconvenience of driving long distances.
Rafael and I walked through the jet bridge and made our way toward the luggage carousel. “If you don’t mind keeping an eye out for our luggage, I’ll go secure the rental car,” Rafael proposed.
“You’re going to leave me without a bodyguard?” I gasped teasingly. The Great Falls Airport was so small the rental car counters overlooked both luggage carousels.
Rafael rolled his eyes. He was chuckling softly when he sauntered off toward the rental counters.
I gathered both suitcases and joined him at the rental counter. “What are we going to be driving?”
He nodded toward the salesperson. “He needs to see your driver’s license so I can include you as an additional driver. I’m renting a new Jeep Cherokee so you can get a feel for how they drive. I thought it might inspire you to upgrade your jeep when we get back home.”
I fished my driver’s license out of my wallet and handed it to the sales clerk. “You expect me to settle for a jeep when you offered me a diamond encru
sted Mercedes?” I inquired teasingly.
Rafael finished signing the paperwork. “I’ll buy both if you trade in that jeep.” He smiled and handed me the keys.
I laughed. “Now you’re talking.” My cell phone rang when we walked outside. I glanced down at the phone and smiled. “Hey, cuz.”
“Oh, good. You’ve landed. Is pizza okay for dinner? I had to work late at the hospital, and Nate’s stuck at the office preparing for an early morning trial.”
I glanced at Rafael. He had stubbornly insisted on carrying all the luggage. He stopped in front of a white Jeep Cherokee and nodded.
I hit the key fob to open the rear hatch. “Pizza sounds great. You know me. I like every type of pizza known to man. Rafael will eat anything but Hawaiian. He’s deeply opposed to eating fruit on pizza.”
Lexie laughed. “Okay. See you soon!”
Rafael set the luggage inside the back of the jeep and closed the hatch. “Pizza and wine for dinner?” he asked.
I nodded. “Pizza is a bit of a tradition for us. Can I drive?”
He reached for my hand. “Of course you can drive. You know this area far better than I do, but you’re going to have to pay the toll first.”
“The toll?” I asked. There were no toll roads in Montana.
Rafael leaned against the side of the jeep. “The toll,” he murmured suggestively. “I need a kiss.” He pulled me toward him until I was standing between his legs.
I luxuriated in the heat and strength that radiated from his chest. I lost myself in his warm, brown eyes while tugging the leather band from his hair. I slipped the band over my wrist and buried my hands in his hair, knowing it would release the spicy notes from his cologne.
Rafael pulled me up onto my tiptoes until our lips met in a sultry kiss. My hands clenched at the nape of his neck as his tongue began to move in slow, intoxicating strokes. Heat flooded my abdomen and thighs when he pulled our hips flush, settling his erection between my legs.
“Rafael,” I groaned. My body and brain were running in opposite directions.
Rafael pinned me against the vehicle when I tried tempering the kiss. “We’re going to work through these fears,” he warned as he pressed every hard angle of his body into mine. His hands burned a trail from my hips to my breasts.
My breath caught when my breasts pebbled against his thumbs. He grasped my face and resumed the kiss until we both lost sight of where we were. He planted open-mouthed kisses all along my neck when he finally broke the kiss. “Let’s go make this dream come true,” he murmured huskily.
My heart pounded some obscure warning when he began to back away. Cenia’s question echoed through my mind. My fingers instinctively tightened in his hair as I forced him to look into my eyes. “Surely you know. You’re the only one that matters. You are the only dream I need to come true.”
Surprise, then relief lit his handsome face. He locked me in the fiercest embrace without breathing another word.
* * * * *
I opened one eye when the bedroom door creaked open, then quickly slammed it shut. Lexie was tiptoeing across the room, presumably on some mission to scare the living daylights out of me. I tried not to smile as I feigned sleep. Rafael’s arm was flung over me. His arm felt heavy, like he was still asleep. The poor guy was in for a rude awakening.
I felt the bed dip down near my knees just before Lexie started jumping on the bed. She simultaneously began belting out the lyrics to “I’m Walking on Sunshine,” her voice terribly out of pitch.
Rafael buried his head underneath his pillow. “Make it stop!” he groaned. He sounded as if he were in an excruciating amount of pain.
I reached for my pillow and swung it against Lexie’s knees. She collapsed onto the bed in a fit of laughter.
“You kept us up all night talking. The least you could do is let us sleep in,” I grumbled half-heartedly.
Lexie shook her head. “No way. I only get two days with you. Two! I’m going to make every second count, so get up!” She sat up and looked at us expectantly. When neither of us moved, she climbed over the top of Rafael, snatched his pillow, and began beating him with it. “Wake. Up!”
He quickly pinned her beneath him. “Cold water,” he demanded. “Now!”
I sprinted toward the bathroom, filled a paper cup full of water, and ran it back to the bedroom. Half the water sloshed out and splashed against my toes.
Lexie was trying to wriggle out from beneath Rafael. “Dump it on her face,” he instructed. He shot her a look that suggested he was bored.
Lexie’s eyes widened. “You wouldn’t!”
I dangled the cup over her face. “Promise you won’t be sneaking in here and waking us up early tomorrow morning.”
Her eyes narrowed. “You need to define early. Also, what time zone are you referring to? It’s nearly eight o’clock in Virginia.”
I tilted the cup a fraction of an inch and snickered when a single drop of water splashed against her nose.
“Okay, okay! I won’t wake you up early!” she relented in an exasperated tone.
Rafael eyed her warily, but he slowly released her arms.
Lexie inched out from underneath him. “That guy’s got some serious muscle.” She massaged her wrists before scooting off the bed.
I laughed. “You’re just now noticing that?”
She shook her head. “I’ve noticed. I’ve just never been on the receiving end before.” She turned to face us when she neared the door. “Are you guys ready for breakfast?”
Rafael shrugged. “Sure. I could eat.”
“Me too,” I agreed. I pulled a pair of sweats out of my suitcase and tugged them on.
“Good,” she replied. “I like my bacon crispy and my eggs over easy.”
Rafael shot me an inquisitive look.
“She’s serious,” I confirmed. “Looks like we’re in charge of breakfast.”
Within minutes, we were hauling bacon, eggs, and toast out to Lexie’s backyard. Lexie trailed after us with the orange juice and coffee. We sank into the large cushy chairs surrounding her patio table so we could enjoy the early morning sun. The air was crisp and noticeably void of humidity, but the pine trees were already beginning to warm. I breathed in their rich, musky scent. “I love this place,” I proclaimed. “Even the air is soothing.”
Rafael poured the coffee while I piled eggs onto everyone’s plate. “Good. That’s why we’re here.”
Lexie fed a piece of bacon to Annie, her golden lab, before turning her attention to Rafael. “How’s she coping with what happened in Ukraine?”
“I’m sitting right here,” I noted mockingly.
Lexie scowled at me. “I know where you’re sitting. I’m asking Rafael because I know he’ll offer a more honest accounting. You’ll sugar coat everything.”
I rolled my eyes over the top of my coffee mug.
“I’m worried about her,” Rafael admitted.
“You’ve lost weight again,” Lexie noted. “Are you sleeping?”
“Not well,” I confessed, “but I’ve been trying to wean myself off the sleeping pills.”
She popped a piece of bacon into her mouth before reaching for her orange juice. “Are you seeing a therapist?”
“I saw the school counselor for a while. My schedule’s been a bit hectic, so I haven’t been able to squeeze in any other therapists. I missed the first month of summer school and had to make up all those assignments while juggling a full course load the past eight weeks. I’m developing a personal risk seminar for my university, and we’ve been dealing with Michael’s estate,” I explained before digging into my eggs.
“That’s her modus operandi” Lexie informed Rafael. “Whenever she’s dealing with something traumatic, she buries herself in work.”
Rafael reached for a piece of bacon. “She’s returning to work when we get back. She doesn’t need more stress. She needs time to process everything that’s happened, time to work through her anxieties and find some peace.”
Le
xie looked thoughtful. “Are you still doing yoga?”
I shook my head. My mouth was too full of eggs to speak.
Rafael’s face brightened. “That’s a great idea. Maybe you can start doing yoga in the evenings before bed, or you can squeeze it in before you go to work like you did in the spring.”
“Are you journaling?” Lexie asked. She threw the raggedy old tennis ball that Annie had deposited at her feet to the far end of the yard.
“I don’t like journaling,” I confessed.
“I think you should consider it,” Lexie opined. “Journaling can help you process and let go of things.” She reached for the coffee carafe and topped off our cups. “So you decided to return to work. I can’t say that I’m happy to hear that.”
I warmed my hands on my coffee cup while watching an incredibly fat robin dig a worm out of Lexie’s lawn. Annie dropped the ball and chased after the bird. “I don’t have to travel anymore, not unless I want to. Shae and I will be responsible for generating some briefings and the training materials, but we aren’t required to take on any trips. My boss, Paul, is going to join Cory and Sammi for the trainings in India and Pakistan in October. He’s trying to gauge how best to involve a security detail while ensuring they don’t become too obtrusive. If the university students feel threatened by our bodyguards, it could impact their willingness to work with us.”
Lexie nodded. “I’ve seen how the presence of police officers impacts the willingness of rape and domestic violence victims to speak at the hospital.”
“Your personal security should come first, regardless of who might feel threatened by the security detail,” Rafael groused. He crammed a bunch of eggs into his mouth.
“What if the security team were trainers too?” Lexie asked.
I gaped at her. “That’s… brilliant!”
She snorted softly. “Yeah, right.”
I grabbed her arm. “No. I’m serious. That is brilliant. If the security team led part of the training, they could pass as additional trainers. This would give them a cover, so it wasn’t so obvious they were the hired muscle.”