Where the hell were all these feelings coming from? I didn’t know her, or what her story was or her situation.
And I certainly wasn’t in the position to feel anything towards anyone.
I made my way over and gently placed a blanket on her.
Because I didn’t want her to get cold and then be sick and require extra care.
That was the only reason.
At least, that was what I tried to convince myself was the only reason.
I made my way through a few books until I was satisfied that I understood what I thought was happening. Turning around, I saw she was still asleep and had burrowed under the blanket I had placed on her. I observed her for a moment when inspiration struck. Her car. No doubt her purse would be in the car. All of the books seem to indicate that temporary amnesia was common after a head trauma and, often, some small detail allowed the person to regain their memory quickly. No doubt if I knew her name and she saw items that belonged to her it would stir something.
I looked out at the still-falling snow. I could make it to the barn and get in the side door. I had one large snow blower right by the front porch and I could plow my way through. It would be worth it if she could remember her name. Maybe she would relax a little. She jumped a little every time I moved or spoke. I didn’t want her afraid of me. I didn’t like it.
I made my way downstairs and added a couple of logs to the fire. I left a couple more pain pills on the table in case she woke up and came downstairs. Then I dressed warmly and went outside in the storm. It took a while to even get to the snow blower and by the time I made it to the barn it had been well over an hour. I was panting as I finally opened the side door and got inside, and my leg was now throbbing painfully. I stood for a few minutes, catching my breath. I lit one of the gas lights and checked on the generators, making sure the gas level was good. I had a large supply of full gas containers, having learned the hard way how long these storms could keep me isolated.
I made my way over to her car. The back passenger side was heavily damaged. Obviously, she had hit the tree very hard. The back tire was now completely flat. I shuddered thinking what the results would have been had she hit it head on. I went around and opened the driver’s side back door and saw a bag on the floor. Leaning in, I grabbed it. It didn’t look like a purse to me; more an overnight-type bag.
I looked around the car but that was all I could see. I had another thought, and leaning in, opened the glove box, searching for a registration slip. There was nothing in the glove box at all. I looked in the small console but it too was empty. I noticed the dust on the dashboard and the slight musty odor in the car. Obviously, it hadn’t been driven very much. I felt around under the seats and then checked the trunk, but aside from a snow scraper, the car was empty. I shook my head as a shiver ran through me and knew I needed to get back to the warmth of the house. The mystery of the car would have to wait. I grabbed the small bag I had found and blew out the light before stepping back into the swirling snow. The path I had cleared was already filling in and I started the snow blower back up and made my way towards the house as quickly as possible.
I entered through the side door, dropped the bag on the bench, and then pulled off my snow-laden clothes. I hung them up on the line, threw on a pair of sweats that were there, padded into the kitchen intent on heading for a shower, and stopped short.
Standing in front of the stove, stirring something that smelled delicious was … Rabbit. I smiled internally at her new nickname. She, meanwhile, looked up at me, startled.
“What are you doing?” I asked as I walked toward the stove. She shouldn’t be moving around. She should be resting.
She stepped back quickly away from me. “I … I woke up and heard the snow blower. I thought you’d be cold and … hungry when you were done, so I made some soup. You had lots of vegetables and things in the fridge. I didn’t think you’d mind. I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have …” her voice trailed off, trembling.
Fuck. She was afraid again.
I raised my hand and smiled at her. “No … no, that’s great. It smells wonderful. I had hoped you would still be sleeping. I wanted you to rest. I’m sorry the noise woke you.”
I watched her shoulders relax a little. “I’m happy to do it. I think … I think I like to cook. And I thought if I moved around a little the pain would ease up.”
I grinned at her. “You like to cook? Good to know. Because I hate it. And my repertoire is highly limited. But please, don’t overdo it. I’m just gonna go shower and change, and then we can eat, okay?”
She smiled shyly and nodded.
I was right.
Rabbit had a lovely smile.
It was indeed very appealing.
Chapter Four
Joshua
Twenty minutes later, I looked up from my bowl. “Seriously, all of this was in my kitchen?”
Rabbit smiled shyly. “I just rummaged around and threw in stuff until it tasted good. I thought it would warm you up. You were out there so long.”
I nodded. I hadn’t shown her the bag yet. I thought I would wait until after we had eaten. I dug back into my bowl. “So, you don’t have a name for this?”
She shook her head. “Um … just soup?”
I smiled. “Well, its great ‘just soup’. Thank you.”
We were both quiet as we ate. I wondered how she would react when I gave her the bag. Would she remember everything?
A sudden gust of wind rattled the windows. Rabbit jumped slightly with the unexpected noise.
“It’s okay, Rabbit. It’s just the wind. You’re safe, I promise." I spoke without thinking.
Her head tilted to the side as she regarded me. “Rabbit?”
I shrugged sheepishly. “I have to call you something. ‘Hey you’ doesn’t seem right. And you remind me of the little grey rabbits that are around here.”
“I don’t understand. I’m furry?”
I laughed. “No, you’re small, kinda jumpy and, dressed the way you are right now, you’re all grey. And they look at me apprehensively when I approach them, just like you do.”
She regarded me quietly for a moment, her eyes locking me in their gaze. “Are you hunting or feeding them when you approach?” she asked.
I smiled soothingly. “I’m a sucker. I feed them. I don’t hunt. At all.”
Her shoulders relaxed a little. “Rabbit’s okay then.”
I grinned. “Rabbit it is.”
After we were done, Rabbit moved back into the chair upstairs, Bear hot on her heels. I was pleased to see she wasn’t as unsteady on her feet as she had been. She did, however, take some more painkillers when I offered them to her and she didn’t argue about not cleaning up after we ate. After I tidied, I went back to the mudroom and grabbed her bag. I threw more logs on the fire and went upstairs. I approached her slowly and stood in front of her
“What’s that?” she asked quietly.
I knelt down, gingerly, on the floor in front of the ottoman and placed the bag on top. She looked at the bag with no recognition. I pushed it towards her. “I think it’s yours. I got it out of your car. I’m hoping your ID will be in it.”
“You didn’t look in it?” she asked surprised.
I shook my head. “No. It’s yours. Not mine.”
She stared at me briefly then reached for the bag. I watched as she pulled out various pieces of clothing, the store tags all intact, a few toiletries and then pulled out an envelope and opened it up. Inside was a large pile of cash. She looked up at me, confused. “That’s it. Just some clothes and this money.”
“Does any of it look familiar?” I asked.
She held up a few of the clothes, studying them, and then set them down, looking discouraged. “No. Not at all.”
She looked at me with a sudden burst of hope. “What about the glove box? Maybe there’s a registration card? Or insurance papers?”
I shook my head. “I looked everywhere. This is all there was.”
“I do
n’t understand. Why don’t I have any ID? And why do I have all this money?”
“I don’t know, Rabbit.”
She looked down at the clothing and money again. “I don’t even know if this is mine.”
Abruptly, she dumped the money out of the envelope and slowly sorted it. I watched her silently as she counted it and then looked up at me. “Eighteen hundred and fifty dollars, Joshua. Why would I be traveling with a few pieces of clothing and eighteen hundred and fifty dollars in cash?”
“Maybe you were running from something, Rabbit.”
She looked at me. “You think that because of the bruises, don’t you?”
I glanced down to her bruised hands, which were now tightly clutching the edge of the blanket. The overriding need to comfort her hit me again and I leaned forward and loosened her hands and wrapped mine around them. I spoke gently. “Something happened to you. Something put you on that road in the middle of a storm.”
Her voice was unsteady. “Why don’t I remember?”
“You hit your head. Hard. There is a very good chance you’ll remember everything in a few days. You need to rest and let yourself heal.”
She sighed shakily and was quiet for a few minutes. I sat with my hands still wrapped around hers, gently rubbing them in comfort. Suddenly, she looked at me with fresh trepidation in her eyes. “What if …” her voice trailed off.
“What if what?” I prompted
Her voice was quiet. “What if I’m a bad person? What if I stole those clothes and that money? Maybe the car isn’t even mine. Maybe I’m running because of something I’ve done. Maybe …” she hesitated. “Maybe I … knocked up a store? Over a store? Knocked over a store?”
I snorted. “What, like a career criminal, Rabbit? You think you’re a thief?”
She looked at me. She was serious. The woman who had just made me soup and who my dog had taken instant ownership of, thought she had to be a bad person.
I shook my head. “Then you’re a bad criminal, Rabbit.” I gestured to the small pile on the ottoman. “If your haul is a few items of clothing, less than a couple grand, and a five-year-old Escort, I suggest you give it up,” I smiled at her and winked. “Plus, your inability to come up with the right lingo suggests that perhaps you aren’t so inclined.”
I saw the corners of her lips twitch. “Maybe I was having an off night.”
I threw back my head and laughed. I was pleased to hear a small giggle escape her lips.
I smiled over at her and squeezed her hands gently. “I highly doubt it, Rabbit. You don’t strike me as a hardened criminal. Or any kind of criminal. I’m sure there is another explanation. You could have lost your purse. Or left it behind, if you were in a hurry.”
A sudden searing cramp in my leg reminded me of the awkward position I was currently in. I groaned, releasing Rabbit’s hands and grabbing for the top of my right leg.
She moved, kneeling beside me. “What is it, Joshua? What’s wrong?”
I gritted my teeth against the pain. “Need to stand,” I managed to get out.
Rabbit wrapped one of my arms around her shoulder and helped me to stand. I didn’t fail to notice her grimace of pain from the effort of helping me.
“What can I do? Tell me, please.”
I took a deep breath in, the pain abating a little. “I need to go get in the hot tub; that will help ease it.”
“You’re limping worse than before. It’s because of doing all this for me, isn’t it? The extra snow blowing and the work of waiting on me? Oh God, you carried me yesterday as well. Tell me what to do, Joshua, please.”
I looked down at her earnest face, touched by her concern and even more so from her lack of prying questions. I smiled reassuringly at her. “I had to get to the barn anyway, Rabbit. And since you weigh about two pounds, carrying you was not an issue. This happens. Please don’t worry.”
“I’ll go run a tub for you,” she said as she tried to duck out from under my arm. I held her against me, shaking my head.
“I have a hot tub in the basement. I hate using the electricity right now, but I need it.”
She hesitated. “What can I do?”
“Nothing. Really, this happens a lot. The heat helps a great deal. Then I’ll stretch it out and give myself a rub down. I’m an old pro at this.” Reluctantly, I let her go. I liked the feeling of her tucked under my arm.
I made my way to the stairs and gingerly began the descent. I stopped part-way down. Turning around, I looked back at her. She had moved to the top of the stairs and was watching me. “I wear my shorts in the hot tub. You’re welcome to join me,” I offered. “It’s big.”
Her eyes widened.
I stumbled over my next words. “The hot tub that is. The hot tub is big. You’d be perfectly safe. It may feel good on your injuries as well. Especially on your back and legs.”
She glanced down.
“Grab one of my t-shirts.” She still didn’t look up and I softened my voice. “You don’t have to, Rabbit. Only if you want to, okay?”
She nodded, not saying anything.
“The stairs to the basement are beside the mudroom door.” I turned and kept going. “Please be careful going down the stairs,” I added.
I shook my head when I got to the basement.
What was going on with me?
Rabbit; in the hot tub with me.
A little voice in my head snickered at my stupidity.
What had I just done?
Chapter Five
Joshua
I relaxed into the bubbling hot water with a deep sigh of relief. The burning pain in my leg began to ease quickly. I leaned my head back and tried to relax. Part of me was listening to see if Rabbit would join me. What was it that made me feel so protective of her? I had never had this kind of response to another person. Normally I didn’t like strangers. Yet she didn’t feel like a stranger to me. The couple of smiles I had seen flit across her face made me want to see more of them. Every time she grimaced in pain or fear, I wanted to immediately make both go away. I found my reactions highly disconcerting.
The basement room felt chilly outside of the tub. The walls and floors were all tiled due to the moisture from the tub and the exercise pool and, with no heat the air was cold. I sunk down further into the water. A few minutes passed before I heard soft footsteps coming down the steps.
Opening my eyes, I saw Rabbit standing at the bottom of the steps looking very conflicted. Smiling, I held out my hand. “Don’t stand there too long. The room is way colder than in here.” Still she hesitated. “You’re perfectly safe, Rabbit. I promise. Nothing will hurt you here.”
Slowly, she came forward. She had removed my sweatshirt and pants and was back in the t-shirt she had woken up in. I could see the bruising that ran down her leg. My mind was also quick to notice how shapely her legs were. Shaking my head to clear the unwelcome thoughts, I held out my hand once again. “It will feel good on your back and legs,” I said quietly. “I won’t hurt you. I promise.”
Her head tilted and she regarded me briefly. “I know that,” she whispered. “I’m not sure why, but I feel safe with you.” I smiled at her soft confession, feeling pleased. I wanted her to feel safe with me. I wanted to make her safe. I watched as she made her decision and, grasping the railing with one hand, she placed her other in mine. I was amazed how well her tiny hand fit within mine as I helped guide her down the steps into the hot water.
Where were these thoughts coming from?
Slowly she sank beneath the water and closed her eyes. I heard a small hiss escape her mouth as the hot water hit her body and then I saw her relax. I pointed out where the jet adjustments were and moved away from her. We both were quiet for some time as the water bubbled and flowed around us, its soothing heat working its magic on painful limbs and muscles. Opening my eyes, I saw her looking around the room. “It’s usually much warmer down here,” I spoke up, startling her.
“You use all this equipment a lot?” she asked indicatin
g to the various pieces of exercise equipment.
I nodded. “I have to try and keep the strength up in my leg and I have a program I follow. The exercise pool helps a lot. The hot tub was really just a want more than anything. I found when I was in therapy it was a welcome relief.”
Internally, I groaned.
Nice word vomit. I could simply have said yes.
She nodded, not saying anything else for a bit. “How long ago did you hurt your leg?” she asked softly.
“Six years,” I replied shortly.
She nodded, but didn’t ask any other questions. I closed my eyes again and allowed the heat of the water to continue to help ease the pain. Using one hand, I attempted to imitate the rhythmic hand movements my therapist in the hospital used when working on my leg after a session. My attempts were, as usual, rather pathetic, but it was all I could do. I looked down into the water wishing I could do a better job and noticed Rabbit watching me intently. I smiled sheepishly. “My therapist used to rub it while in the water, said it worked best that way.” I shrugged. “I don’t do quite as good a job as she did.” Rabbit’s face twisted slightly as if in thought, but didn’t say anything. I shut my eyes, not wanting her to think I was staring at her.
After a few minutes, I felt the movement of the water and opened my eyes, surprised to see Rabbit was beside me, looking at my hand as it kneaded the muscle in my leg. My hand stopped and her eyes flew up to meet mine. We stared at each other for a moment. Even in the dim light, I could see the various emotions in her expressive eyes. Trepidation, caution and, finally, a look of determination passed through her amazing pools of blue as she looked at me. Unsure of what she was thinking, I smiled warmly at her, once again wanting her to feel safe.
Into The Storm Page 3