I had looked at him. He was right.
“If you can’t, I can either sucker-punch you so when you wake up you’re already in the air and have no choice, or I’ll take your feisty little sidekick with me,” he shrugged, chuckling. “Either way, mission accomplished. But if it’s you, then there is one more layer for them to try and figure out since you are basically unknown to them. Another way of ensuring your girl’s safety.”
I nodded grimly. Rabbit. That was the goal. That was what I needed to concentrate on. Not what I couldn’t do, but what I could do. What I needed to do. Bring her home.
Then he laughed, clapping his hand on my shoulder.
“There it is.”
“What?”
“That look of determination I need. I can do this without you, Joshua, but with you it will be so much easier. She needs to see you there. And frankly, you need to be there. Cecilia and Trevor will hold down the fort here. My guy will be on Bob’s tail the whole time. He is such an idiot. He has no idea he is being followed or that his accounts have been hacked. For someone in security, he is incredibly lax. Although I suppose for that we should be grateful.”
I stared out the window.
For Rabbit. I could do this for Rabbit.
Rabbit’s eyes suddenly flew open and she struggled in my arms in panic, bringing me back to the present.
I leaned down and spoke in her ear, promising her that she was safe. I stroked her soft cheek and rocked her until she was once again still. “We’ll be home soon, Rabbit,” I reassured her as I smiled down at her. Her sigh was shaky as she snuggled back into my chest. I tightened my arms around her. I looked over at Frank who had watched our quiet exchange with bemusement. He smiled and shook his head at us then leaned back in his seat. I couldn’t help my answering smile. She was in my arms. I had her.
We landed in front of the house and waited until the blades had stopped. Frank got out and I followed, still holding Rabbit. “Let me down, Joshua,” she smiled softly. “I can walk to the door.” I stood her on her feet, but kept her hand clasped in mine. The door opened and Bear came barrelling out past Cecilia and Trevor, barking and making a beeline for Rabbit. “Brace yourself,” I warned, holding out a hand to try and stave off Bear’s advance. Rabbit fell to her knees, opening her arms, and within seconds, was smothered by Bear’s joyous greeting of welcome. Everyone watching laughed as he alternately licked her face and butted his head into her chest for attention, running around her in circles, barking his happiness at seeing her. Finally, he sat down heavily in front of her, flopping his head on her lap, his large paws on either side of her. She bent over him, lovingly stroking him, giving him his own welcome in return. I bent down and patted his head. “Let her up, Bear.” He raised his head and looked at me. “She’s not going anywhere,” I assured him.
Rabbit smiled as she gave him one last neck rub. “No, I’m not.”
I helped her up and she was greeted with hugs from both Cecilia and Trevor. Once inside, we all sat down at the table, Bear huffing and pushing people out of the way to stay close to her, laying his head down on her knees once she sat down. I sat on her other side, my arm still around her, needing the comfort of her touch. She looked across the table at Frank and suddenly smiled. “You’re the janitor!”
He laughed and tipped his baseball cap. “Pleased to make your acquaintance, ma’am.”
She looked around her in amazement. “I didn’t think I would ever be back here,” she said softly, looking at me disbelievingly. I could see her bottom lip was beginning to tremble. Cecilia stood up and extended her hand. “Come with me, Rabbit,” she said kindly. Then she looked at Trevor. “We need to go as soon as I come back. We all need to be in place tonight. Just in case.”
Trevor nodded. Cecilia and Rabbit disappeared down the hall. He stood up. “We’re going to lie low for a couple days, Joshua. We’ll stick to our normal routine. And, I think you need the time alone with Lizzy. We’ll be back just as we planned. I’ll get started on the paperwork we talked about also, and I'll talk to my associate.”
I stood up and looked at both him and Frank. ”I can’t even begin to thank you enough …” my voice trailed off. Trevor waved me off. “We just made a wrong decision right. It’s not over though, Joshua. Getting her back was just the first step. We have to figure out where we go from here.”
“I know. But not today.”
He nodded. “Not today. Today, enjoy having Lizzy back.”
I nodded, too overcome at the moment to speak.
Rabbit was home.
The chopper took off and I went back into the house. Just knowing Rabbit was inside made the atmosphere seem lighter. I walked into the kitchen and my face broke out into a huge, beaming smile at the sight before me. Gone was the sombre woman dressed in dark, restrictive clothing. Rabbit was standing at the counter in a pair of her leggings and one of my shirts, which hung down low on her thighs, the sleeves rolled up several times to her wrists. Her feet were adorned with my thick socks and her hair fell over her shoulders like a dark satin ribbon. Her sweet face was devoid of any makeup and her smile was shy and filled with warmth. “There’s the girl I love,” I said happily, holding out my arms, enveloping her close to me when she stepped forward. I stood back after a minute, holding her hands. “No more dark suits, Rabbit.”
She squeezed my fingers and shook her head. “No.”
I looked down and saw the ring was gone. I lifted her hand and stared at the angry red welt that wrapped around her slightly swollen finger. I raised my eyes to her face questioningly. “Rabbit?” I asked quietly.
“It didn’t belong there,” she whispered, echoing my thought earlier. “Cecilia helped me get it off with cold water and soap.”
“Where is it?”
She shrugged, unconcerned. “I tossed the first one out the car window the day I ran, but I hated this one even more so … um ... I gave it to Cecilia and asked her to drop it out of the helicopter or something. I don’t ever want to see it again.”
I kissed her swollen finger gently and placed her hands on my chest, stroking her arms. “Okay. Good decision.”
I stepped back, squeezing her arms affectionately, and frowned when I saw her wince. I pushed up the sleeves of my shirt and looked up at her, horrified as I saw the dark bruise on her forearm. “He hurt you again. I waited too long,” I breathed painfully, my throat tight. “Rabbit …” My hands pushed up the sleeves further, terrified of what other marks I would see.
Her fingers on my mouth stopped me before I could say anything else. “I’m fine, Joshua. He grabbed me once. You got me before it became worse. Please … don’t. Not tonight. I’m home … tonight is just for being happy … please.”
My hands stilled and I stared into her eyes. They were tired but held so much love and forgiveness in their soft depths. I kissed her fingertips and drew her back to me, cradling her. Leaning down, I kissed her longingly.
“Happy isn’t a big enough word, Rabbit.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Joshua
Rabbit shivered in my arms. I looked down. “Are you all right?” I asked softly, unsure if she was cold, tired or simply overwhelmed.
She nodded. “I haven’t been sleeping well. I didn’t sleep at all last night. I was so worried about today … so worried I would do something that would ruin whatever you had planned.” Her voice caught. “So worried that the one thing I wanted more than anything wouldn’t happen.”
I leaned down, scooped her up, and headed upstairs. I settled us both in the large chair, throwing the blanket around us. Bear followed closely and lay down by the ottoman. I smiled, knowing he would not be far from Rabbit again for a while.
I looked down into her sweet, tired face, stroking her cheek slowly. I knew we had to have this conversation. I needed her to understand my thoughts and actions.
“I had to keep you in the dark, Rabbit. I know the subterfuge probably seemed overboard but I couldn’t risk him figuring it out. I couldn’t ri
sk you.” I grimaced when I looked down at her arm. I picked up her hand, lifting her arm close and delicately tracing the bruise with my lips. Closing my eyes, I took in a deep breath.
“I didn’t want to let you go, Rabbit. I didn’t. But I thought I was doing the right thing.” I opened my eyes and looked into her soft gaze, needing her to understand how I felt. “But I was wrong. So fucking wrong. From the moment I knew I was wrong, I have been working on getting you back to me. Praying it was what you wanted as well. That you still wanted me even after what I had done. The night …” my voice trailed off painfully and I had to swallow before I could continue. “The night the line rang and I knew you had figured out my card … I could hear you breathing on the other end of the line ... just breathing … and I knew you were scared and I knew you needed me. Then the next day, when I heard your voice … God, Rabbit, I thought I would go insane not being able to get to you fast enough. I wanted to storm the castle, so to speak. But Trevor and Frank convinced me to do this right. To do it safely and make sure we got you out carefully so you weren’t in danger … and he didn’t have a chance to hurt you again.” My fingers traced her arm and I looked at her regretfully. I hadn’t made it in time.
“I sent that card with you in case you needed me. I told myself I wanted things to work out for you, for you to be happy. But something wasn’t right, it just didn’t feel right, and I needed to know you had something. Something of me that you could use if you weren’t happy. Some small connection to me if you needed it. I knew you would figure it out. And, once you did, it seemed safest to stay on that path. A piece of blank paper. Even if someone else looked at it, they wouldn’t know. But you would know how to find the messages. I was afraid if someone tried to talk to you, that you might not know if they were with me or not. Or, it would be noticed and then he would tighten things up even more, making it so I couldn’t get to you.” I sighed. “I was just … so afraid, Rabbit. So afraid I wouldn’t get the chance to right my wrong, to make you safe and get you back. So I went overboard.”
“What if I hadn’t figured out the first card?”
I smiled down at her. “I knew without a doubt that you would figure it out, Rabbit. You read my books, you know me. You know how my mind works.” I kissed her cheek softly, and my voice became serious. “But if you hadn’t, I would have gotten to you anyway. Somehow, I would have found a way, even if I had to kidnap you to get you away from him.” I paused. “I found your purse, Rabbit. I saw the journal. I saw what he did to you and I was getting you out of there no matter what.”
“You found my purse?”
I nodded. “Bear dug it out of the snow. It must have fallen out when the door opened after you hit the tree.” My arms tightened around her. “The pictures were the worst thing I’ve ever seen, Rabbit. It made me physically ill to see what he did to you. What I sent you back to.”
“You didn’t know,” she whispered.
I looked at her and shook my head. “No, I didn’t know, but I stopped asking the right questions, Rabbit. I acted rashly and reacted instead of thinking.” I shook my head. “I put you in so much danger. Seeing those pictures drove that fact home.”
She looked away. “You’ve seen the pictures. So you know it all then.”
I lifted her face. “I know what the pictures showed me. I don’t know the story. You can tell me when you’re ready. You can tell me anything.”
She nodded. “I will. But not tonight. Please.”
“When you’re ready. I’m here,” I assured her.
She smiled softly. “I liked the rabbit. How did you get it into my mug?”
I grinned. “Cecilia found the rabbits. She thought it would let you know, without a doubt, that it was me leaving you the messages. That it would give you something to hold onto for the last day. We had someone watching you. Before you got there, they dropped it in your mug. And made sure you saw it.”
She looked at me, frowning. “What if I hadn’t?”
“Then some nice, older lady would have approached you before you left that day, thanking you for all you had done helping her son to read and would have handed you another one, and another card,” I explained. “Today, if anything had gone wrong, you would have been handed another card with a different way to get to me. If all else failed I would have come to you and taken you up those stairs myself. No matter what happened today, you were coming home.”
“You must have bought a lot of rabbits.”
I smiled and reached into my pocket and pulled out a handful. “I think Cecilia bought out the store. She said she saw them and had a feeling we were going to need them.”
Rabbit smiled as she touched the little bundles resting in my palm.
“You thought of everything,” she breathed.
I cupped her cheek, stroking her skin gently. “We did. Frank, Trevor and Cecilia were all part of this. In some way, they are all responsible for helping me get you home to me.”
She covered my hand with hers, her fingers pressing tightly. “You were so brave today, Joshua. You overcame so much to come and get me. I know it must have been so difficult for you. But you did it.”
“For you,” I whispered insistently. “I’d do anything for you, Rabbit.”
She sighed and turned her face, nuzzling it into my palm. “I can’t tell you how much I love hearing you call me that.” She looked up at me. “I’ve always disliked the name Elizabeth. It seemed too formal, but … Brian insisted on calling me that.”
“You preferred Lizzy?” I asked encouragingly.
She nodded. “It always sounded more … warm and friendly.”
I smiled. “I can do that … Lizzy.” The name sounded strange on my tongue.
She shook her head. “No. Rabbit. I’m your Rabbit.”
Leaning forward, I kissed her. “Always my Rabbit. Always.”
We were quiet for a while, just sitting close. Reveling in the comfort of being in each other’s arms again. Rabbit suddenly spoke up. “Why didn’t you pick up the phone when you knew it was me?”
“I didn’t have that kind of line installed. It only accepted messages. I did it so fast, Rabbit. All I could think of was a way you could get hold of me. And, in my zealousness to make sure you were safe, I had an untraceable, unanswerable line installed, and I followed it up by encrypting the number on the card. I knew only you would figure out the book references. But if, somehow, the card was discovered and someone else called the line … there was no voice on it so no one could accuse you of knowing who the number belonged to.” I paused. “Unfortunately, there was also no way of letting you know it was me and that I was hearing you.”
“I thought you’d given up on me,” she admitted tearfully, averting her eyes. “That you didn’t care anymore when all I got was an empty line. I didn’t know if I was talking to a machine or to nothing. I so desperately wanted to hear your voice.”
I heard the pain in her voice and gathered her closer. “I’m so sorry. I heard you, Rabbit. I cared. God, baby, I cared so much.” My lips pressed into her soft hair. “I can’t make up for what I did. I should have waited and found out more before I sent you back. Even worse, I should have listened to you and I shouldn’t have let you go. I was stupid and arrogant. I don’t even know if you can forgive me.”
“You never thought I loved you the way you loved me, did you?”
I shook my head. “No, I knew you loved me.” I lifted her hand and kissed the warm palm and held it to my cheek. “And, I knew no one would ever love me that way again. You were such a gift to me, Rabbit. An unexpected, wonderful gift. But I thought I didn’t have anything to offer you but a half-life, cut-off from the world. Isolated here with me. Nothing outside this place. It wasn’t what I wanted for you. He seemed to have everything you needed to have a good life. The kind of life you deserved to have.”
Her hands came up and cupped my face. “No, Joshua. There is nothing there for me. You are all I need. Life with you is what I want. It’s what I need. You have so much
more to offer than you think.”
“Can you forgive me? For sending you back? For not being what I should have been?” I asked quietly, my voice shaking with repressed emotion.
She looked up at me, eyes awash with unshed tears. “Already forgiven, Joshua. I love you,” she whispered, her voice breaking.
I cupped her face, wiping away the tears that were sliding down her cheeks. “I love you, Rabbit. If you let me, I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you how much.”
“Show me now,” she pleaded.
Groaning, I lowered my mouth to hers, my tongue immediately seeking entry. Her lips parted and I was once again able to lose myself in her. I pulled her closer, tucking her into me as I shifted so she was now under me in the large chair. Again and again, my tongue explored her sweetness, delving and tasting, desperate for her. My hands traced her curves, loving how right she felt moulded into me. Her hands were under my shirt pressing me against her, soft encouraging whimpers escaping from the back of her throat when I broke away to caress and worship her neck with my lips, wanting to rediscover all of her. I moaned as I felt her hand slip under the waistband of my pants pulling me closer to her. I could feel myself losing control and I pulled back. “Not here in a chair, Rabbit. I want to love you—I want every inch of you loved and it can’t happen in a chair.”
“Take me to our bed,” she whispered huskily.
Our bed.
No two words had ever been sweeter.
I stood, taking her with me. Her head was buried in the crook of my neck, her lips moving on my skin in silent words of adoration, her warm breath filling my senses. Swiftly, I took her to our room and laid her on the bed. I looked down at her with her hair spilled across the pillow, her eyes gazing up at me burning with a thousand emotions. She sat up, pulling the shirt over her head. “Please, Joshua,” she beseeched, her hand stretching out. “Please.” I stopped at the sound of the desperation in her voice. We were too close to the edge already; our emotions taut and so close to breaking. I needed to slow both of us down.
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