by Nikki Ashton
Deciding enough was enough, I started to move out of the shadows and back to our table, but as I did Lauren went in for the kiss. As she lurched forward, lips puckered, I pulled to a stop, a gasp of shock leaving my body with same speed as the adrenalin pushing through my veins. I wanted to scream and rush her, but my feet were rooted to the spot and tears pricked my eyes at what I thought was about to happen. Then my heart almost exploded when Elijah ducked out of the way and put his palm up in front of Lauren’s face. I couldn’t hear what he was saying, but I watched his lips as they said ‘What the fuck are you doing? I’m with Amy. I love Amy.’ Lauren said something that I couldn’t see, but Elijah took both her forearms and gently pushed her away. Then he raised his voice, shouting ‘Lauren, I’m sick of telling you no’. As he turned his back on her, I decided it was time for me to go back to my boyfriend.
“What’s going on?” I asked, as I reached our table.
Elijah looked up at me and rolled his eyes. “Lauren is leaving.”
Lauren’s head shot around to me and she plastered on a smile. “Hi, Amy. I’m just going. I was asking Elijah if he’s seen Alex.”
“Alex?” I asked.
“Erm, yeah. He owes me a drink.”
“Really?”
“Lauren,” Elijah warned. “Stop with the shit and tell Amy why you’re really here.”
“I think I know,” I said, giving him a smile. “And I think you know, Lauren, that Elijah isn’t interested, so just give it a fucking rest. It’s a muggy thing to do and you know it.”
Lauren’s eyes went big as she stared between me and Elijah. I could see her bottom lip tremble and wondered if she was going to burst into tears.
“I…He…He’s always flirting with me,” she snapped. “I would never do anything unless I thought he wanted me to.”
“I fucking don’t,” Elijah cried. “I don’t even look at you for longer than two seconds, because I know if I do you’ll come rushing over, trying to get me to take you out, or even go outside with you.”
“I do not,” Lauren replied, not at all convincingly.
I sighed and took hold of her arm. “Listen, Lauren, I don’t really care. Now if you don’t mind, I’d like my seat back please.”
I pulled Lauren up and as soon as I was able, flopped into my chair.
“You are such a knob head,” she spat at Elijah. “As if I’d be interested in you.” With that she spun on her heels and stormed off.
“She’s a fucking psycho,” Elijah groaned, as we watched her go through the main door of the pub.
“Hopefully she’s got the message.”
I picked up my drink and took a long swig. When I put it down, Elijah gave my shoulder a squeeze.
“You do know I’d never do anything to hurt you, don’t you?”
“I do,” I replied. “But she never stops trying to get you away from me. It’s all the time and I hate it.”
“But she isn’t going to succeed,” he said, taking a strand of my hair and twisting it around his fingers. “You’re who I want to be with, not her.”
“And I know that,” I stressed, my voice getting a little louder. “But it still doesn’t stop me worrying and wondering every time you’re out and I’m not around. I’m constantly thinking is she coming on to you, are you talking to her, has she turned your head ? ”
“Never.” Elijah interrupted me, shaking his head. “She will never turn my head. You are everything to me.”
I dropped my gaze to the table and dragged a finger along the chipped varnish. I hated sounding so pathetic and so needy, but I couldn’t help it.
“It was funny at first,” I said, still staring at the table. “But now I’m sick of it, and sick of how she makes me feel. I’m not a jealous person and I know that you love me, but she’s making me doubt everything about us.”
“Amy,” he whispered, lifting my face so that we were eye to eye. “I had no idea she made you feel like this. I thought like me, you just found her annoying as fuck.”
“She went way past annoying a long time ago,” I sighed.
Elijah’s eyes darkened as he shifted his chair closer to mine. “I’ll talk to her, tell her to back off for good. I don’t want you worrying all the time, because I swear you have nothing to worry about. She is nothing to me and never will be, I promise.”
His brown eyes begged me to believe him and I knew he was telling the truth. I nodded and within seconds his lips were on mine, kissing me gently until I let out a soft moan.
“I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you too.”
My gorgeous, brown-eyed boy kissed me again and I knew he was all I would ever want.
Amy
aged 28
I’d been working on Tino and Sophie’s house for almost two weeks and had barely seen Elijah. The three guys that worked for him were constantly in and out of the kitchen, making cups of tea or warming up pies and sausage rolls for their lunch in the microwave, but Elijah never did. I’d caught sight of him a couple of times working in the garden, but mostly he’d stayed away.
“So, Claudia,” Bob, one of Elijah’s men said eyeing her up and down. “What do you do in your spare time?”
Claudia took a sip of her coffee and made a strange sound from the back of her throat. I wasn’t sure, but I think she was growling.
Bob’s sandy coloured eyebrows arched. “Well?”
Claudia put her mug down slowly and gave him a tight smile. “Any reason you ask?”
“I’d love to take you out, if you’re not busy.”
I snorted and dropped my gaze to the fabric swatches on the table.
“I’m busy most weekends,” Claudia replied.
“Oh, come on, you can’t be busy every single weekend. Surely you have some spare time.”
Claudia breathed deeply and I almost felt sorry for Bob. It was her, ‘I’m about to be a bitch’ sigh.
“Oh dear,” I muttered.
Bob looked at me and then back to Claudia.
“Come on Bob,” Marty, one of Elijah’s other men said. “Leave Claudia alone, there’s no way she’ll want to go out with you and your big, fat, hairy arse.”
“I don’t have a hairy arse.” He looked at Claudia. “I really don’t love. So, do you have some free time?”
I heard the breath again and looked up, unable to stop myself from watching the car crash that was about to happen.
“Actually,” Claudia said, helping herself to more coffee from the pot. “I tend to have quite a lot of spare time at the weekend.”
“So, you will come out with me then?”
Claudia gave him a smile and shook her head. “No Bob, I won’t.”
“Oh,” he said taking a step back, obviously a little shocked at her forthright manner. “Okay.”
“You see, Bob, any spare time I do have, I spend in bed with my girlfriend. You know, having sex, pleasuring each other. We might even eat some food off each other’s naked bodies, or eat something else, if you get my drift.”
Marty let out a short laugh and then slapped a hand over his mouth, turning to look at Bob who was staring at Claudia with his mouth wide open.
“You see, Bob,” Claudia continued “I’m gay and really not interested in men at all. I should also point out that if I was, it’s still unlikely that I’d go out with you.”
“You wouldn’t?” Bob asked, frowning.
Claudia shook her head. “Nope. Marty is right, you do have a hairy arse.”
Without another word she lifted her mug, continued to drink her coffee and sort through some invoices for light fittings.
I looked at Bob who was staring at her totally nonplussed, while Marty quietly laughed with his shoulders shaking.
“Bob I-,”
Before I had time to say anything else the back door opened and Elijah’s tall frame filled the doorway.
“Nice to see you’re all having a lovely time in here,” he said, his hands on the hips of his mud -streaked cargo, work trousers.
“Because me and Anthony are working our fucking nuts off out there. There’s a truckload of Italian slate slabs just two hours away and you pair are in here fucking drinking tea and chatting with the ladies instead of finishing the prep for the south terrace.”
“Sorry boss, we were just-.”
“I don’t care what you were just fucking doing, Marty. I want you to just fucking get out there and get some work done. This is not your lunch break, it’s a damn tea break and by my watch that finished ten minutes ago.”
Bob and Marty both moved to the sink, Marty swigging back the rest of his tea. Bob started to run the tap but stopped when Elijah groaned.
“Leave those, you can do them later. Get out there now.”
They shuffled out, leaving the door open behind them.
“Someone got out of bed on the wrong side this morning,” I muttered, shifting my gaze back to the swatches of fabric.
“Sorry?”
I heard Elijah’s boots on the tiled floor and then felt his presence beside me. My body tensed and the hair on my arms stood on end as my senses recognised him. His scent and his heat all too familiar. I slowly tilted my head, giving him a sideways glance.
“I said, you’ve obviously got out of bed on the wrong side this morning. They were just chatting and drinking their tea. They’ve been working hard all morning.”
“And you’d know that would you?” Elijah asked, moving closer.
I stood up straight, still holding tightly to the swatches and rolled my eyes.
“As you pointed out, every room looks out onto the garden. I’ve watched them. In fact, I’ve seen them every day working hard while you’ve been prancing around doing God knows what.”
Elijah’s nostrils flared as fury shone in his eyes. I knew that look, I’d seen it many times before; rarely had it been used on me, but I’d seen it.
“You have no fucking idea what I’ve been doing. Not that it’s any of your damn business, it’s not like we’re married, Amy.”
His words were spat out and every single one of them caused my heart to ache.
“And whose fault is that, Elijah,” I snapped back, taking a breath to try and stop the tears that were threatening to fall.
I had loved this man since I was seventeen years old. I’d cherished everything about him – his need to bloody jog every day, the fact that he insisted on having the bedroom window open each night, his obsession with Only Fools and Horses and the fact he could recite every line. I loved every single thing about him, even the way his calloused fingers felt touching my skin. So, how the hell had it come to this – oh yes, he couldn’t keep his bloody cock in his pants.
“Well, not mine.”
His brown eyes flashed with hurt as he stared at me.
“I’ll just go and erm, sort through the boxes of light fittings.” I heard Claudia say from behind me.
“Don’t go on my account,” Elijah replied. “I’m not staying.”
“No, it’s fine,” she replied.
When I heard the door close I turned sharply, wondering if she really had left, and when I realised I was alone with Elijah, my stomach turned over.
“Just go back to work,” I said, turning back him. “We obviously can’t be civil to each other, so it’s probably best we don’t even speak.”
“Yeah probably,” Elijah replied. “But I didn’t cause this Amy, you did the day you fucked off without giving me a chance to defend myself.”
I shook my head, my mouth in a flat, grim, determined line.
“No, Elijah, you don’t get to blame me for this. You were the one who jumped into bed with Lauren. While I was in the same house, I should add, just to twist the knife a little more.”
“Exactly, you were in the same house. As if I’d jump into bed with her, knowing you were downstairs, never mind I’d never jump into bed with her full stop. You know how fucking drunk I was Amy, you were the one who said I should go and lie down for a while.”
He threw his hands in the air and took a pace closer to me. Anger seeped from every pore on his body and I could feel it all aimed at me.
“Yeah,” I huffed. “I certainly laid that one on a plate for you, didn’t I?”
Elijah let out a breath and shook his head. “You’re never going to listen to me, are you?”
“It’s hard to listen to lies, Elijah.” I sucked in my lips and prayed that I didn’t start to cry, because even after five years I still wanted to curl up in a ball and sob over my broken marriage.
“All I wanted was for you to listen, Amy. Listen and then make up your mind, but you couldn’t even afford me that luxury, could you?”
We stared at each other and it was evident that at least we had the sense not to speak for fear of saying something that could never be forgiven. Finally, Elijah scrubbed his large hand down his face and did a half-turn toward the back door.
“One thing you should know,” he said, his voice strained. “I fucking loved you and the thought that you would think I could hurt you like that, well that’s what gutted me the most.”
He then stormed out, slamming the door so hard the cups in the sink rattled, and I’ve never wanted anything more than to be able to turn back time and do things differently.
Amy
aged 28
After my run in with Elijah, the last thing I felt like doing was going to a family dinner, but Mum and Dad had been on holiday and she wanted to see her babies, together, for the first time in two weeks. This meant that I was being greeted at the door by a tanned, smiling Mum.
“Hello love,” Mum said, pulling me into a hug. “Ooh I’ve missed you.”
“You’ve only been gone two weeks.” My voice was muffled against her chest. “Did you have a good time?”
“Lovely. Your Dad swam every day.”
I looked up to see her eyes glistening with the fear that she still felt about Dad’s heart attack, even after ten years.
“And he was okay?” I asked, not worried, but reaffirming to mum that she didn’t need to wrap him up in cotton wool.
She nodded and then taking in a quick breath, started to study me. “There’s something wrong with you though.”
“What makes you think something’s wrong?”
“You’re my daughter, I gave birth to you. I know every expression you have and you’re currently wearing the ‘something is pissing me off’ expression.”
I rolled my eyes and moved past her into the hall, making my way into the kitchen, knowing it was where everyone else would be. Everyone else being my Dad, my brother Matty, and Matty’s girlfriend, Carla.
“Hey,” I said, as brightly as possible. “Oh my god, Carla. You’re bloody blooming.”
I rushed over to her and ran a hand over the swollen stomach and kissing her cheek. Matty and Carla were having a baby and at five months pregnant, she was all of a sudden looking very pregnant.
“She’s looks beautiful, doesn’t she?” Mum said proudly as she moved over to the oven to check the Shepherd’s pie that was permeating a homely, comforting smell into the kitchen.
“I don’t know about that,” Carla replied. “I feel fat and horrible.”
“You’re not fat, babe and you know it.” Matty kissed her temple and grinned.
My heart swelled as I watched them, knowing that they were going to be fantastic parents despite being young. It hadn’t been the best timing, Carla getting pregnant during their final year at uni’, but at least it had been close to the end. Thankfully, they’d both managed to get decent degrees despite all the worry and the fact that Carla’s parents had practically disowned her, hence she and Matty were living with Mum and Dad. Dad had suggested it, saying it would allow them to save some money toward the deposit on a house. Mum had also offered to look after the baby when it came, once Carla got a career job, as she was currently working in a call centre. Both she and Matty had degrees in Computer Science, and Matty had already started as a junior developer with a software company, so things were looking good for them.<
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“Aww you’re going to be such a good baby daddy,” I said, playfully pinching my brother’s cheek.
He pushed me away, but gave me a gorgeous smile that was full of pride.
“How are you Dad?” I asked, moving over to give him a hug.
“Great thanks, sweetheart.” He squeezed me tight and kissed the end of my nose, as he always did. “How’s the new job going?”
“Fine,” I replied, going over to the sink to get myself a glass of water.
“No, the job is not fine,” Mum said from behind me. “I can tell, something is bothering her.”
“What makes you think it’s the job?” I asked, still with my back to them. “If there even is anything wrong.”
“Well you don’t currently have a boyfriend and don’t seem to want one, you look healthy enough, I saw Rachel in town earlier and she seemed happy, so it can only be the job.”
Mum was right, the only other person I’d be worried about would be my best friend, Rachel, my rock. She’d been my friend since primary school and had been through every single moment with me and Elijah, even the horrible, shitty ones at the end. She was newly married to Adam and extremely, annoyingly happy, so Mum had deduced correctly what my problem was.
I turned around, knowing I couldn’t keep it from them any longer. I was going to have to spill the news that Elijah was working with me.
“Okay,” I sighed. “There is something.”
“I knew it,” Mum announced proudly. “You can’t get much past me.”
Dad rubbed her arm. “Let her tell us, Claire, okay?”
“Yes, sorry love. Tell us.”