Allison slammed the door shut behind me the second I was inside and flipped the deadbolt, her movements quick and jerky. She shucked her jacket and tossed it to the floor in a careless gesture, then wasted no more time on foreplay or preparations.
She pinned me forcefully to the door, and I let my purse fall to the floor. Her hands went around my waist and pulled me tight against her. She gazed into my eyes for a heartbeat or two, and all the air in my lungs whooshed out of me as I tried to make sense of the emotions I could see crackling and snapping behind hers. When her lips descended possessively over mine, my attempts to decipher what I’d seen in her eyes scattered along with my thoughts.
Holy fuck, she’s an amazing kisser. That was my first coherent notion after who knew how long. Better than I remembered, actually. Time had blunted the memory of how exquisite it felt to have her lips pressed against mine. I was so caught up in the sensation and reeling at how incredible, how right, it felt that it took me a moment to remember I could participate in other ways. Warmth flared in my chest and slowly radiated outward as I tangled one hand in her thick, black hair while I moved the other lower to palm her ass through her jeans. I gave the cheek in my hand a firm squeeze, and Allison let out a low, guttural groan and rocked her hips against mine. I nearly came on the spot.
A warning sounded in the back of my head, faint, but not faint enough for me to ignore. Then it came again. Breathlessly, I wrenched my lips away. It was too hard to think and kiss her at the same time. My head was spinning and not just from the alcohol. No, I was drunk on desire. I wanted her in a way I’d forgotten I could want anyone, and it would’ve been so easy to get swept away on the torrent of perfectly mind-blowing sensations that her kiss sparked. But I didn’t feel right about the situation. We were both more than a little tipsy, and things were wretchedly complicated for me. I was positive I’d never be able to forgive myself if I didn’t at least try to talk to her before we gave into our obviously mutual desire.
“Allison, wait,” I gasped, turning my head when she leaned back in to kiss me.
A rumble emanated from deep within her chest, and she ignored my protests and immediately started exploring the skin of my now-bared neck with her lips. I shivered and tightened my grip on her, moaning a little as I did. Dear God. Was there anything about this woman that didn’t completely short-circuit my brain?
Allison worked one hand beneath the fabric of my shirt and started stroking my skin with her fingernails. Goose bumps broke out over my entire body, and I covered her hand with one of my own. It was an effort, and the part of me drowning in the need for her to touch me howled loudly in protest.
“Allison, please, just wait.”
She pulled back a bit and eyed me with a borderline-hostile expression. “What?”
“Are you sure this is a good idea?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, don’t you think maybe we’ve had a little bit too much to drink?”
She scoffed. “Honey, we’ve never been too drunk for this.”
She leaned in to kiss me again, and I cuffed her on the shoulder, trying not to laugh. “You know that’s not what I meant.”
She nodded slowly. “On a scale of church sober to that weekend in New Orleans, how drunk are you?”
“Um…I’d say I’m Superbowl Party tipsy. You?”
“Desjardin’s retirement, maybe edging toward New Year’s Eve.”
“Oh.”
“Okay?”
I frowned. “Sure.” I was glad this wasn’t all a booze-fueled hook up, but there was still the matter of…well, everything else.
She regarded me for a long moment, her expression unreadable. And then, inexplicably, she smiled. “Are you married?”
“What?”
“You heard me.”
I made a face. “Of course not!”
“Seeing someone?”
I grimaced at the reminder of my recently failed relationship. That was actually a huge part of the reason I’d stopped this. What the hell had I been thinking, coming up here to her room with her? This was—
“Are you really a man?” Allison rushed on before I could fall too far back into my self-loathing or varying degrees of guilt.
I blinked, and it finally hit me what she was doing. She and I’d had an eerily similar conversation the very first time we’d slept together, only then our positions had been reversed. She’d been the one who’d been a touch unsure, and I’d attempted to lighten the mood with inane queries.
Allison brushed some stray wisps of bang off my forehead and tucked them back behind my ear, smiling broadly now that she seemed positive I recalled the exchange. “Whatever it is, it doesn’t matter. Okay?”
I bit my lower lip and nodded, not completely reassured but feeling at least a little better.
“Do you want me to stop? Because if you don’t want to do this…”
The mere suggestion was like fingernails on the chalkboard of my mind, and I shook my head. “No. Don’t stop.”
Allison cupped my jaw with her fingertips and scoured my eyes again. She waited a long moment as though to give me time to pull away, if that was what I really wanted, like she doubted my words. And then she leaned in slowly to kiss me again. It seemed to take forever for her lips to finally brush mine, but when they did, I sighed. I could easily have spent the rest of my life just kissing her.
Allison deepened our kiss, easing her tongue into my mouth and stroking mine. It almost tickled in a wonderful way, and I whimpered. Allison’s lips curved into a smile, and I pulled back just enough to nip at her bottom lip. She slid her hands around my neck and pulled me tighter against her as she moaned. The sound sparked something primal inside me, and I knew I was seconds away from letting her take me against the hotel room door. As hot as that would’ve been, it wasn’t what I wanted right now.
Using a technique we’d learned in training, I dropped my hands so the heels rested against the front of her pelvis and pushed, tucking my elbows in close to my body and creating a little distance between us. Allison growled and tried to press her body back against mine as she increased the intensity of her kiss. I waited, thoroughly enjoying the pressure of her hips against my hands, and when I thought she was pushing as hard as she could, I released my grip and swiftly wrapped my arms around her to cup her ass. I used her forward momentum to scoop her up into my arms. It was a bold move, tipsy as I was, but she instantly locked her legs around my waist, grinding against my belt buckle. She cried out, but the press of my lips muffled her moans.
Praying she hadn’t left anything on the floor for me to trip over and I could pull this off without injuring both of us, I walked us farther into the room and dropped her on the bed. Passion flared even hotter in her dark eyes, and she scooted back, kicking off her boots. I took the opportunity to lose my own shoes as well.
Allison’s eyes bored into mine as she wrenched her tank top from her body and quickly went to work on the fly of her jeans. Normally, I loved undressing her, taking my time to discover each part of her as I revealed it. Tonight, however, both of us were too far gone to even pretend to be slow and leisurely. At least this first time. I vowed to savor her later.
Maintaining our charged eye contact, I shimmied out of my clothes. I didn’t care where they ended up as I flung them away from me. I wanted nothing between me and the hot press of her skin.
Allison hit me in the face with her panties and then tossed her bra at me. Automatically, I caught both and returned her smile, tossing the bra over my shoulder. The panties gave me pause, and I captured the crotch between my thumb and forefinger. God, they were wet.
“Come here.”
The panties slipped from my grasp, and I crawled across the bed and immediately covered her body with my own, dispensing with my usual ritual of feasting on the smorgasbord of her naked flesh with my eyes. Right now, I needed to feel her. The desire was an all-consuming ache, and my head swam.
I groaned deep in the back of my throat as our bo
dies collided, and a wave of satisfaction-tinged relief washed over me. She felt more amazing than I remembered, more incredible than I could ever have imagined, and my skin hummed everywhere we touched.
Allison cupped the back of my neck with one hand and pulled me to her, crushing my mouth to hers in a bruising, possessive kiss. She wrapped one leg around my hip, and the new position allowed me greater access to her dripping center.
She groaned, tilted her hips, and pulled me tighter to her. Evidently, she wanted me to continue. Smiling into our kiss, I stroked her again, pleased with how easily my fingers slid through her slick folds.
Allison hissed and broke our kiss, throwing back her head and squeezing her eyes shut. The fingers on the back of my neck tensed, and she rocked her hips again. Then she ripped my hair tie out, and I took advantage of my momentary freedom to shift my position, sliding down on the bed so I could lavish my attentions on her breasts with my lips while I used my hand to drive her a whole different kind of crazy.
The sounds wrenched from Allison’s throat were the stuff of legends. I could think of no more powerful aphrodisiac than her little moans and gasps of pleasure, except perhaps hearing her say my name as she came. The heat that poured off her was intoxicating and drew me like the proverbial moth to a flame.
“Ryan,” Allison pleaded a little breathlessly, tugging on my hair.
“Mmm.” I closed my eyes and trailed lingering kisses over the taut planes of her abdomen, tracing the ridges of her muscles with my tongue. I sucked on the skin surrounding her belly button and slid my fingers a little higher, so I was almost brushing the spot where I knew she needed me most. Almost. But not quite.
“Turn around.”
“Mmm.” I wasn’t paying attention to her words, much more interested in the tension I was creating in various parts of her body as I skimmed my lips over her skin. The scent of her arousal enthralled me, and I nuzzled the juncture where her thigh met her hip.
“I want to taste you,” Allison whispered softly. She followed her statement with a small sigh and, despite her words, lifted her hips toward my mouth.
Okay, that got my attention. I raised my head just enough to meet her eyes as I dragged my tongue slowly through her wetness, relishing her musky flavor.
Allison moaned and threaded her fingers back through my hair, gripping hard. She tugged my head back, and I glared at her, irritated that she was interrupting me. I had explicit plans for her, and she was the exact opposite of helpful.
“Ryan, please?” Her voice was low and husky, full of desire.
Arousal pierced my gut and tickled that odd spot under my right arm that it did in only the most extreme cases. I closed my eyes against the onslaught, which was almost too intense to bear. Allison loosened her grip in my hair and began to rake gentle trails through it, causing a shiver to run down my spine. I trembled, reveling in the pleasant sensations she was evoking in me.
I opened my eyes to meet hers and saw swimming beneath their depths the very passion that’d shattered me and in the same moment somehow made me whole time and time again. I melted under the weight of that look.
Still unable to form coherent sentences, I simply nodded. I lifted myself, and she sat up to meet me, our lips brushing one another in a long, tender kiss. When we broke apart, she flashed me an impish grin and raised her eyebrows once in an almost playful gesture. I grinned back, recognizing the unspoken order for what it was, and readjusted my position so she could reach me while I lavished attention on her.
Her hot breath tickling the skin of my inner thighs made me completely freeze. The first touch of her tongue gliding over my sensitive folds made me lose my focus altogether.
I lay there for a long moment, my cheek resting against her leg, completely unable to move. My eyes were closed, and sparks were dancing along the insides of my eyelids that seemed eerily timed with the motions of her tongue against my throbbing core.
My muscles all went tight, and my body trembled. Jesus, this wouldn’t take long at all, I thought stupidly as I spread my knees a little wider. She let out a sort of growl as she wrapped her lips around me, and the slight vibration made me gasp.
Remembering where I was and what I was supposed to be doing, I bent my head so I could resume my earlier activities. Only I upped the ante and thrust two fingers inside her as well. She made that low, guttural noise again and rolled her hips beneath me. I chuckled as I pulled my fingers out slowly. She whimpered, and I, never able to deny her anything, slid them back home.
Her entire body went rigid, and her thighs quivered. She was moaning more often, and her motions against my swollen sex were becoming almost frantic. She was definitely about to come, and I was thrilled to know she was as close as I was.
It took all my willpower and concentration to remain focused on her pleasure because I was dying to submit completely to her touch. Fighting that instinct was a bitch. But, somehow, I did. And it was absolutely worth it. Feeling her groan of surrender against me as she fell dragged me over the edge with her, and as we clung to one another, riding out the ecstasy of our shared orgasm, I couldn’t imagine anything more perfect.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
We lay there for a while, our bodies and limbs tangled, catching our respective breaths. We’d shifted positions so Allison’s head rested heavily on my shoulder, and I brushed my lips over her hair as I stroked her back with my fingertips. I was floating in the most incredible post-bliss haze, and I didn’t have the energy to even wonder what came next for us. I was spent.
“Wow,” Allison whispered.
“Yeah.”
“That was…” She shook her head and sighed, snuggling more securely against me and throwing one leg over my hip. “Wow.”
“Yeah.”
She traced random patterns on my other hip, and I smiled. Then I didn’t hear anything but our mingled breathing for a long time. I thought she’d fallen asleep and was drifting off contentedly when she murmured so quietly I almost didn’t hear her.
“I’ve really missed this.”
My eyes popped back open, and I tensed. A cannonball suddenly splashed down in my chest, and I didn’t know how to respond. Did she mean she missed being held by someone in general? Or was she telling me she missed me specifically? Her words didn’t indicate her meaning, and since her face was pillowed against my chest, I couldn’t see her expression for any clues. I finally went with the ever-eloquent and appropriate, “Huh?”
“Mmm. So you are awake.” Allison’s voice sounded a little teasing.
“Yeah. I…yeah.” It was lame, and we both knew it, but I couldn’t think of anything else to say. Now that we’d slaked our passion somewhat, and I could think, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to happen next, what was even feasible. After a long silence, during which Allison inhaled several times as though she wanted to say something, she just exhaled softly.
“You did know I was talking about you, right?” she asked finally.
I shrugged, not wanting to shatter the afterglow by mentioning that she’d slaughtered me once upon a time. Nothing kills the mood faster than bringing up old wounds. Except perhaps giving voice to fears that she might one day do it again.
Allison propped herself up, leaning on one elbow over me and looked intently into my eyes. Her brow furrowed, and she pushed the hair back out of her eyes with an impatient motion. “Please tell me you know that.”
I bit my lower lip and thought about how to respond. Apparently, my hesitation was answer enough because her forehead uncreased, and the corners of her lips pulled down slightly.
“I guess I can’t blame you. I mean, not after the way we ended things.”
You mean the way you ended things? I wanted to say. Thankfully, I managed to keep a lid on that little addendum. Instead, I tucked another stray lock of hair behind her ear and trailed my fingers down her neck to play at her collarbone.
“I’m surprised.” I made my voice as gentle as possible. I hadn’t planned to discuss this, but since she
’d brought it up, we might as well talk about it. “Considering I haven’t heard a word from you since you left.”
“I didn’t know what to say,” she said.
“You could’ve said anything.”
“I couldn’t have said what you wanted to hear.”
“You didn’t know what I wanted to hear. And sometimes hearing the opposite of what you think you want to hear is enough. At least it gives you a place to start healing.”
“Yeah, no kidding.”
I frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Allison scowled, let out a huff, and rolled away from me, yanking the sheet up to cover her exposed breasts. I felt the loss of her warmth immediately.
“Nothing. I’m sorry. Let’s just drop it.” Allison averted her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest, drawing into herself.
I wanted to touch her, wanted to make her look at me, but wasn’t certain how she would react. Instead, I sat up against the headboard, drawing the sheet up to cover my own body. “Oh, I don’t think so. Not this time. If you have something to say, let’s hear it.”
She didn’t reply, and a dread crushed me.
She stared at the desk chair in the corner of the room with more interest than was really warranted. I could see the muscles in her throat working as she swallowed. “Do you remember the day we broke up?”
I winced, not expecting the question. “Yeah.”
Silence. Where was she going with this? The crushing weight had turned icy.
Allison took a deep breath and clenched and unclenched her fist in the sheet beside her leg. “Do you remember what you said to me that day?”
I frowned slightly. I’d said a lot of things to her that day and spent the past few years trying to forget them. Most I’d sputtered, heartbroken. Why would she want to remember any of that? I didn’t.
“You mean what I said about loving you for the rest of my life?” That was the only thing worth recollecting.
Allison nodded but still wouldn’t meet my eyes. “Yes.”
I waited for another question. She didn’t ask one. “What about it?”
Actual Stop Page 20