by Casey Herzog
Despite the devastation, relations with the Europans seemed much improved. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that those who were left were the ones who genuinely wanted The Unity and Earth League to look out for them. It might have had more to do with the fact that the Secessionists were now gone from Jupiter. With no more conflict in the system, there was now no need for the Unity crew to exert pressure on the Europans to work and they, in turn, did not have to worry about trying to appease two masters.
Once the critical systems were restored, duty rosters became surprisingly relaxed. Europa colony was in no position to continue their operations, and so most of the colonists found themselves put to the business of repairs. With more and more of the facility returning to normalcy every day, Peter found it easy to take time to slip away and wander the corridors alone.
He struck out, as he often did, for the reactor core. Whenever he let his feet carry him on instinct, this was invariably where he ended up. He never let himself enter the room where he had confronted the Engineer, but an observation room above the core allowed him to look down into that space.
He had cleared Philips' body himself. Like a guilty secret he didn’t want anyone to know about, Peter had slipped down to the core almost as soon as the clear up operations had begun. Minerva had helped him. Together they hauled the mangled and desecrated corpse to the furnaces and burned him up themselves. No one on Europa, no one else on the Unity would know what he had done. Not that it mattered though. Peter’s conscience had found a way of punishing himself for what he had done.
The door behind him opened, and Peter turned. Minerva had to duck a little to get through the door and quickly walked over to Peter’s side. As her mismatched eyes looked down into the reactor room, she purposefully took Peter’s hand in hers.
“How long are you going to keep sneaking down here during your off duty hours?”
“Not much longer,” Peter answered. “We’re shipping back to the Unity in two days, after all.”
“That’s not going to stop you from coming back here though.” Minerva’s voice was serious, and she was not going to broker jokes from him. “I’m millions of miles from Mars and yet I still find a way to go back to the mess hall where my mother was killed nearly every day.”
“I still can’t believe what I did, Min.” Peter squeezed her hand a little tighter as he spoke and his mind cast itself back. “I know killing him was the best way to save the colony...but the rest. I’ve never felt anything like that before. For God’s sake, I was in slavery for four years on Earth, and I never dreamt of doing something like that to the people who did this to me.” His free hand traced the line of the deep scars on his cheek.
“I understand why you did it, Peter. That’s why I’m okay with it.”
“You understand it?” Peter looked to her then let out a sigh. “Well, I’m glad one of us does.”
“You’ve been building up to it since Mars.” Minerva took a deep breath of her own. “When mum died, I was really grateful to know that the person who had killed her was dead. At times, I was jealous that it was you who got to kill him rather than me, but most of the time I was just grateful to you that you had avenged her. It hurt me when I saw how much you were hurting over what you did. I didn’t say anything because I knew you wouldn’t want me to. But, I hated seeing you beat yourself up over killing the man who tore my family apart. It felt almost like a betrayal.”
Peter swallowed back a lump growing in his throat. “I’m sorry, Min.”
Minerva shook her head. “No. I’m the one who’s sorry. Before the fight, you said something in the truck to me. You told me I wasn’t going to enjoy killing the Secessionists as much as I thought I would. It was difficult to hear, having my best friend tell me he thought I was a blood thirsty maniac.”
“I’m sorry.” Peter didn’t have anything else to offer but an apology.
“Quit apologizing and just listen to me, idiot.” Minerva smiled. “I’m trying to tell you, you were right.”
Peter blinked in surprise.
“You didn’t see me make my first kill. A guy came at me with a bit of broken pipe. It was a one-sided fight. I got him in the gut with my spear. He actually managed to land a blow on my helmet, but the blow was so weak I didn’t even feel it. It’s not like I had a lot of time to process things, but I remember thinking how easy it was to end that guy's life, how little chance he had. For the first time, I was able to see just how desperate these Secessionists are. They’re never going to beat us...but they keep fighting anyway.” She paused. Peter could feel her thumb rubbing the back of his hand.
“I killed six people in that battle.” Minerva continued. “And that is not including those I crushed beneath the hull of that shuttle. I’m fifteen years old. If each person I’ve killed were a year of my life I could repeat my life three, maybe four times over. That’s pretty messed up.”
Peter said nothing.
“I’ve been watching you do all you can for these Europans the last months. Before that, you made that stupid Birthday Club on the Unity. It feels like you’ve been stretching yourself to breaking point, trying to do things that would somehow absolve you of what you did back on Mars.”
Peter had to bite his lip to prevent the emotion from spilling out. His body began to tremble.
“It’s like you’ve been waiting for someone to tell you that you’ve made up for killing that guy. Is that it Peter, did you want someone to absolve you for that?”
There was no air in Peter’s lungs. His chest was painfully tight, and all he could do was give a short nod as tears began to fall silently down his cheek.
Minerva watched him for a moment, her countenance sad. “Well, you’re not going to get it from the people here. Even those who are grateful for what you did for them don’t know why you’ve been working yourself to death for them. So... So, what if I do it for you?”
Peter could barely see Minerva now. His body shook violently, and Minerva pulled him into her. His head rested near her shoulder and she rested her chin on his head.
“We’re never going to get out of this Peter. We’re on a one-way ticket to Pluto. If either of us are going to make it there, we’re going to have to do more. We’re going to have to do more things we don’t like. We didn’t choose to kill those people. Others decided it for us. Earth and the Secessionists themselves are the only ones who can carry the weight of what we’re doing. And it’s up to them to pay the dues for that. If you keep trying to do it, you’re going to break, Peter. I don’t care what you did to that Engineer...I’m just worried what you’re going to do to yourself if you keep shoulder responsibility for every single thing that happens to us here.”
“How do I do that Min?” Peter’s voice was almost unintelligible.
Minerva sighed. “I don’t know, but you start by letting me help you. Back when we left Earth, we were the freaks with no one else looking out for us. We even told ourselves that our friendship comes before the Unity, and even before our cohort. We’ve had a bum year. You’ve been hurting and keeping it to yourself, and I’ve been doing the same. I’m not the same girl you met on Lunar, and you’re not the same boy. But we’re still kind of all we have. So, I need you to quit coming back here and thinking about all the things you’ve done. If you can do that...then I’m going to try and stop going back to that room where my mother lies dead on the floor. If we can both do that for each other...things will be better for us.”
Peter could only nod his head vigorously against Minerva’s chest.
For a few minutes, they continued to hold each other, each of them the other’s lifeline. Minerva was right. Her presence didn’t erase what Peter had done, either on Mars or here on Europa. But he felt better knowing she understood. For now, that was enough.
When at last Peter was able to let go of Minerva, he took his time to sort out the mess that was his face. His eyes were raw and burning, and he could feel the dried contrails of his tears. Minerva was little better. She too had
been crying and her eyes were just as bloodshot. He felt a need to say something, to comfort her as she had just done for him.
“You look like shit.”
“You look worse, Crater face.”
Peter laughed to hear his old moniker used again. It felt good to have Minerva teasing him again.
“Come on Peter, we’ve got two days till we re-embark on the Unity. I can think of far better ways to spend our downtime that doesn’t involve looking at a nuclear reactor.”
“Coffee?” Peter asked, hopefully
“Coffee!” Minerva repeated. “Hopefully that fan of yours will be around to make it for us again.”
CHAPTER 21
The story drew to its conclusion. On board the Retribution, every voice on the ship had been silenced by the powerful words of the storyteller. That silence clung to the mess hall for some minutes after he had finished speaking. Though none of the Retribution’s crew would have openly admitted it, they were all waiting for a continuation. The storyteller was not so generous with them.
Jude’s chest heaved. He had been taken in by the story of Earth’s great enemy the previous day. Now though, Peter’s story seemed to resonate with him on a deeper level. His mind filled with the memory of lives he had been forced to take in the Retribution’s resubjugation of the Solar System. He had not been in the kinds of battles that Peter Gabell had fought in, but he had been made to put down those who had rebelled against the Earth League. On Mars, he had been forced to kill a woman who had refused to cooperate during a security check. When she had been stopped for a random search, the woman had been oddly evasive and tried to flee. Jude had been forced to bring her down. He had not meant to kill her. When he had thrown his spear, his intention was to hit her leg and cripple her. His throw had been far deadlier and the woman fell to the ground with his weapon dug deep between her shoulder blades.
He had gained a commendation for his quick thinking and decisive action. Still, it had always bugged him and been a continual source of regret that he had to kill that woman. When her body had been searched, she had been found to be in possession of a number of electronics and parts that seemed suspicious. It was decided she must have been attempting some kind of sabotage on behalf of the Secessionist cause, but it always bugged Jude that it was never confirmed. He had wished so many times that he could have spoken to the woman, got the truth out of her so that he knew he had acted in the right.
As the lights in the room came up, he told himself to get a grip. He was now the highest-ranking officer on the Retribution. Even if the ship had been captured and their mission brought to an ignoble end, he couldn’t let himself be compromised by the enemy. This whole story of Peter’s past was propaganda. The storyteller couldn’t know Gabell’s every thought and emotion. Minerva and the crew from the Unity were just using their leader’s death to sow uncertainty and disloyalty in their captured prisoners.
His eyes wandered to Commander Tharsis. The Martian had held a stern visage throughout the story. At times, Jude’s eyes had flickered to her. At intervals, he thought he had seen her lip quake or a wetness pool about her eyes. However, he was forced to wonder. Was she really as close to Gabell as the storyteller suggested? She had been fighting in wars for years now. She was doubtless used to seeing friends come and go. But, if Peter really was as close to her as the storyteller claimed, Jude couldn’t help thinking she should be more broken up about it. That thought, more than anything else, served to harden Jude’s heart enough to drive away the temptation of feeling empathy for his enemies.
“Thank you, members of the Retribution who have joined us in remembering our fallen comrades.” It was Goswami, the dark skinned medical officer from the Unity who spoke now. “Rather than return you to your bunks, we would now like to invite you to spend an hour or so in our company. Talk to us. Ask us questions. We make no disguise of the fact that we hope our tale might give you cause to reconsider your positions in this war. Even so, we will answer any question you bring to us honestly.”
“And how do we know that?” Jude clenched his teeth as Ana spoke out. Why did she have to keep making a target of herself?
The Indian woman gave a polite smile, running her hand through her long raven hair. “Because we respect you. Your ship, your crew, you are our brothers and sisters. If anyone can understand what we went through in our mission, it is you. We have no desire to lie to you because we truly believe you will come to see the truth as we did.”
“Plus, it couldn’t hurt to enroll more soldiers into your growing army.”
Goswami did not bother to answer Ana’s second question. Her hostility was obvious, and Goswami had no tolerance for it.
The invitation to talk openly with the Unity crew was met with mixed success. Most kept their distance and passed up the opportunity, but some did not. That anyone took up Goswami’s offer at all was a bad omen though. It didn’t matter if simple curiosity drove them, or a desire to play nice with their captors. Minerva and her people were beginning to sway their prisoners. How soon before some of Jude’s people declared a change in allegiance?
Unable to make a public plea to his people, Jude let them make their own decisions and mistakes. He took his place by Ana’s side. He didn’t feel safe talking to her with so many ears potentially listening in. Still, he did not have many opportunities as it was.
“Seems we’re going to have four more nights of this,” Jude spoke in a hushed voice, his arms crossed tightly across his chest.
“A story for each planet in the Solar System.” Ana let out a derisive laugh. “I suppose we should be grateful to our captors. Even if they are spinning a load of nonsense to brainwash us, at least it's semi-entertaining nonsense.”
Jude nodded. “Better than a film reel telling us all the reasons why they’re right and we’re wrong.”
“You believe some of it though, right.” Ana shot him a dark look. “I’ve been studying the way you are when that storyteller is running his mouth. You’re not just listening politely, you’re really letting it in.”
“It’s just a story,” Jude said defensively.
“And you keep telling yourself that. In case you’ve forgotten, we still have a mission to attend to.”
“I know,” Jude hissed. He didn’t let his mind dwell too much on the work that needed to be done. The thought of blowing up his own ship and people to take out their enemies still didn’t sit right with him. It was, however, what Earth would demand of them now.
“Tomorrow, we need to start setting things in motion. If we delay, we risk our people defecting. Every one of us who goes turncoat adds risk to our plan and will make it harder for us to operate under the enemy’s nose.”
Before Jude could reply, the tall unearthly woman in charge of the Unity wandered over. Both Jude and Ana closed their mouths at once. Ana shot the Martian a contemptuous look, then walked away.
Tharsis watched Ana go, then stood in the spot she had previously occupied. She was far taller that Jude, and when she looked down at him with a knowing smile he felt in every way inferior to her. “Are you plotting against us, Jude?”
“Of course we are. You’re still the enemy after all.” He hoped by telling the truth outright he might catch Minerva off guard. “If our positions were reversed and we had captured you, would you just accept it?”
Minerva smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “If you had beaten us we wouldn’t have to worry about accepting it. Earth guidelines would have seen your people execute us the moment the battle was done.”
Jude frowned. It didn’t feel great knowing that Minerva was right about that. It didn’t sit well knowing his captors were treating him and his people far better than they needed to.
Minerva drew in a deep breath. “You’ve got a decision to make Jude, just as the rest of your crew do. When it comes time for you to take a side, just make sure it is Your decision. Don’t let us or your second in command bully you into making a decision that doesn’t come from your heart.” Minerva stretched.
“Anyway, I’m going to talk with those in your crew who seem a bit more talkative. I’m sure you want some time to yourself.”
Jude was silent as he watched her go. He did have a lot to think about, and right now, all he wanted to do was ignore the conflicting voices in his head. He would not be able to do that for long though.
Magic Eyes
Bonus Book 1
Casey Herzog
Co-Author: C.J. Scarlett
***
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Chapter One
I was awakened by a sharp rap on the door downstairs. I could tell that it was still pitch black outside, and I was worried who might be out there at that time of night. I stretched and made an involuntary groan of dissatisfaction, having lost the chance to finish my pleasing dream. A faceless stranger had been holding me close and whispering sweet nothings in my ear. I couldn’t remember what he was saying, but I knew I had felt safe and secure, as if the person were there to protect me.
I went to the window and peered down to see something both strange and exciting: an Elder was patiently waiting, wearing his customary knee-length black leather jacket. I knew that it couldn’t be good. There was no way an Elder would come here, of all places, unless it was absolutely necessary.
That Elder in particular could be quite intimidating. It was a well-known fact that he was a professor of Natural Studies. When I took one of his classes, it left me shaking my head wondering how he could have such disdain for his students. They were scared of him. Some literally shook in their boots every time he walked by.
I felt naked and quickly grabbed a black robe from the back of the door. I knew that my father was out. He was quite secretive about his work and I never had the courage to ask him about it. When I went down the stairs, the sensor immediately activated to light my way with each step. As I made my way towards the front door, I took one more glance to make sure that this was nothing to worry about.