by L.H. Cosway
But then, it appeared he was waiting for me to say something back, which meant his words were real. I hadn’t imagined them.
“Kiss me then,” I replied breathily, trying to be bold.
Barely a second elapsed before his mouth found mine. Was this really happening? James’ lips were tender, just a whisper really, but the kiss was still electric. So many thoughts flooded my head, the loudest being, James Khan is kissing you right now! He likes you. He wouldn’t be kissing you if he didn’t like you.
I had to be dreaming. But no, that was definitely his mouth on my mouth, his hard, very real body pressing into my body.
I squirmed beneath him and a rumbling sound emanated from deep in his throat. I moaned again, unable to help it, and felt his thumb dig into my neck where his hand still cupped my jaw.
As soon as he heard my moan, James deepened the kiss, climbing on top of me. I was too lost in him to properly comprehend what we were doing. My legs fell open, welcoming him fully, and my clit throbbed when his erection pressed into me.
James was kissing me, and it was turning him on and my brain didn’t know what to do with that, so I decided to switch it off.
His tongue tangled with mine, sliding and caressing in a way that set every cell in my body on fire. I burned for him, burned for more, now, please.
I didn’t realise I’d said that last word out loud until James broke our kiss for the briefest moment. “Don’t worry. I’ve got you,” he rasped possessively, and my insides hummed.
My hips rose to meet his as he thrust, bringing his erection flush with my heat. He kissed me, exploring every inch of my mouth. I wanted him to put his mouth everywhere. I wanted him to taste my breasts, my stomach, my sex. There wasn’t a single part of me that wasn’t singing for his attention.
“Fuck, you’re sweet,” he growled, moving from my mouth now to press kisses along my jaw and neck.
My head fell back into the pillows as he lowered to my chest, pressing his face to my breasts, nuzzling my now very obviously rock-hard nipples. He locked eyes with me, then bit down gently over my pyjama top and a sharp cry escaped me.
A second later his mouth was on mine again, kissing me with a need I felt deep down in the pit of my stomach. I locked my legs around his hips, while my hands gripped his wide shoulders. My palms wandered down his solid back, and he gave a rumbly sound of approval.
I didn’t know how long we kissed, but it seemed like an eternity. My lips were puffy and sore in the best possible way. Finally, James pulled back, keeping his arms tight around me as he held me to him. I didn’t need to wonder why he broke the kiss. It was too intense. Too heated. And I knew if we didn’t stop we’d end up having sex.
His hand came up to stroke my hair. “That was…” he trailed off, like he couldn’t find the right word. I felt the same. My feelings and attraction to him aside, there was nothing that could’ve prepared me for how explosive his kiss would be. I’d never felt anything like the electricity and heat and sheer perfection with any of my previous sexual partners.
“I know,” I breathed.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
I nodded.
“Can I just…hold you for a while?” he went on and I didn’t think it was possible for my heart to melt, but it did.
“I’d like that,” I whispered back and his arms tightened around me.
Somewhere along the way, I dozed off. The next thing I knew, it was morning. I was warm and cosy – cosier than usual. Slowly, I came to, my whereabouts coming into sharp focus.
James and I had fallen asleep together. He’d spent the entire night in my room. It was a good thing Paul hadn’t come to check on us, because this would be a tough one to try and explain. My face was mashed into James’ chest, my hand spread out on his hard, chiselled stomach. His T-shirt must’ve ridden up during the night because I was touching his bare skin and my brain didn’t know how to compute how amazing he felt.
Carefully, I chanced a peek up at his face. His eyes were closed, his breathing slow and even. I was stunned at how handsome he was when he slept. The morning light filtered through the curtains, casting shadows on his face. I didn’t want to wake him. I didn’t want to move a muscle. I’d be happy to spend the rest of my life here, feeling his solid, reassuring warmth beneath me as I listened to the symphony of his heartbeat and slumbering breaths.
A moment later he stirred, his eyes blinking open as he focused on me. A slow, heart-stopping smile spread across his lips as he whispered sleepily, “Hey.”
“Morning,” I breathed, my stomach all aflutter from his smile when suddenly, there was a knock on my door.
“Michaela?” Paul called. “Are you in there?”
I looked to James in panic. What should I do? my eyes asked.
He brought his mouth to my ear, whispering, “Tell him you’re about to get in the shower and that you’ll meet him down in the lobby in half an hour.”
His voice was almost hypnotic. “I’m about to shower,” I called back to Paul. “Can I meet you in the lobby in about thirty minutes?”
“Sounds good,” Paul replied. “By the way, have you seen James? He’s not in his room.”
I started to panic again. “Um, yeah, I think he went out for a jog in Central Park before breakfast.”
“He did?” Paul said, sounding unconvinced. “But it’s freezing out.”
“The cold never stops you lot,” I answered back. “Bunch of fitness freaks.”
James pinched me, and I shot him a playful look, still unable to believe we’d spent the night in the same bed.
Paul chuckled. “Yeah, you have a point. Okay, I’ll see you downstairs in thirty.”
I exhaled in relief when I heard him walking away. James’ eyes turned sultry as they dipped to my mouth, and I thought maybe he was thinking about kissing me again. We definitely didn’t have time for that. I was about to tell him so when there was another knock on my door.
“I forgot to say,” Paul called loudly. “Yours and James’ bags have been delivered. A porter is going to bring them up to your rooms.”
“Oh, great! Thanks for letting me know,” I called back, and then finally, finally he was gone for real. My pulse started to subside. Then James cupped my cheeks in his hands, a tender expression on his face that made my heart pound even faster.
“This was unexpected,” he breathed, and my lips ached to kiss him.
“Yes,” I agreed in a quiet voice. “Very unexpected.”
His eyes wandered over my face, his expression thoughtful now. “What am I going to do with you?” he whispered.
“Well,” I said, swallowing thickly. “Right now, we need to get dressed. We have a busy day ahead of us. But maybe later we could talk?”
“Yes, talking is a good idea,” James said, but his attention was on my mouth. I suspected he wasn’t thinking about talking right then.
“So it’s agreed,” I said when he didn’t make any move to climb off me.
James nodded, still looking like his thoughts were a million miles away.
“Where have you gone?” I hadn’t meant to voice the question. I just really wanted to know what he was thinking.
He brought his mouth closer, this time scraping his teeth across my earlobe. I shuddered, embarrassed by how wet he’d made me.
“I might scandalise you if I told you that,” he answered, and goose bumps rose on my skin.
“James,” I breathed.
He gently clasped my neck, eyes on my throat. “I have a feeling I could keep you in this bed for days and never get bored,” he murmured, and I rubbed my thighs together to dull the ache between them.
It was so surreal to hear him talk like this. He’d only ever spoken such dirty things in my dreams and to have it happen in real life was almost too much. He was too much. I might spontaneously combust from all the deeply sexual energy he was channelling at me.
“We need to get ready,” I said, and he finally lifted his eyes from my throat. I suspected real-life
sex with James Khan would surpass anything my dreaming mind could conjure up. He was singularly focused and having all that focus on me was sure to be a mind-blowing experience.
He pressed a tender, almost chaste kiss to my lips as he crawled out of bed, never once dropping my gaze as he slid his feet into his shoes. At long last, he turned and headed for the door. I let out a long sigh when the door clicked shut, my thoughts racing.
James had kissed me. We’d fallen asleep together.
All my good intentions to stay away from him had fallen by the wayside. They’d slid away like shadows. When James said he wanted to kiss me, my willpower no longer existed.
What did this mean for us?
If I thought my feelings for him were strong before, now they were coated in titanium. My heart expanded inside my chest. It felt like there wasn’t enough room to contain it. Don’t get me wrong, I was under no illusion that James’ feelings matched mine. After all, I had been pining for him for months. He might’ve been attracted to me (butterflies filled my stomach at the thought), and he might’ve been curious about the possibility of something between us, but I had to remind myself not to get carried away. I hoped he might have the beginnings of feelings, a few breadcrumbs of affection and attraction. Realistically though, it could be that he just wanted sex and I needed to be prepared for that possibility.
A knock on my door broke me from my thoughts. I quickly went to answer it and found the porter had brought my suitcase. I thanked him, then handed him a few dollars tip before going to turn on the shower.
I washed myself in a daze. My hands on my skin didn’t feel perfunctory like they normally did when I showered. Now every inch of me hummed with life. My body buzzed, like James had flipped some sort of switch and turned on a part of me I didn’t know existed.
Out of the shower, I opened my suitcase and picked out my favourite jeans, a long-sleeved top, and some dangly earrings Sarita bought me last year as a birthday gift. I paired these with my new boots, since we’d be doing lots of walking again today.
I blow-dried my hair, leaving it down instead of tying it up in my usual ponytail. I packed everything I needed then went to meet Paul and James downstairs. As luck would have it, James was leaving his room at the very same moment I left mine.
“Hey,” I said, suddenly shy as I tucked some hair behind my ear. James’ eyes followed the movement as he stepped forward, his attention wandering down my body before returning to my face.
“You look beautiful,” he said.
My cheeks heated. “Thanks.”
James gave a smile and arched an eyebrow. “Ladies first,” he went on, gesturing down the corridor.
We walked to the lift in quiet, a new tension between us that was undeniably sexual. We stepped onto the carriage, and I felt his eyes on me as the floors went down. I had a flashback to the very first time we met, when we got stuck on a lift together back in London. We’d been strangers then, but we were far from strangers now. The events of this morning had transported us to a new and unknown place and it gave me a thrill in my belly.
Maybe I was making a terrible mistake, but I wanted to take a chance. Being with James felt like nothing I’d ever experienced before. I’d never had such intense feelings for a man and they cancelled out any logical thoughts of who we were to one another and what the consequences might be.
I bit my lip, unable to help it, and then suddenly James was in front of me. His face was full of heat as he brought his thumb to the lip I just bit. He whispered it across my lower lip, featherlight, and a moment of boldness came upon me. Something about his attention made me feel confident. I held his gaze, all instinct when I flicked my tongue against the tip of his thumb.
His nostrils flared and he tilted his head, like I’d just shocked or intrigued him. My head fell back against the glass wall of the lift, my eyes egging him on. James’ thumb moved further into my mouth. I moaned, and he let out a deep, masculine sound that had me clenching my hand into a tight fist, my nails biting into my palm. James’ eyes were on my mouth as I sucked on his thumb. What were we doing? It was the single most erotic moment of my life.
“I had no idea…” James breathed. I swirled my tongue around his thumb again and he groaned, eyes black now. “You’re going to be the death of me, woman.”
A second later, we reached the ground floor. The doors opened with a ping and just like that he was gone, already standing several feet away. We stepped out of the lift, and he cleared his throat, frowning as he turned away from me. “You go ahead. I’ll be with you in a minute.”
“Are you all right?” I asked, worried I’d done something wrong. Had I been too forward? Did he not like that?
“I’m fine, I just need a minute,” he answered stiffly and realisation hit. What happened inside the lift had left us both undeniably aroused. Fortunately, I could hide mine better. There were definitely plus sides to being a woman when it came to impromptu sexy moments in public.
“Oh…okay. I’ll see you in a minute then.”
I left him standing there, wishing I could help somehow. The instinct only made my mind go to much dirtier places. I shoved those thoughts aside. They definitely weren’t appropriate thoughts to be having on the way to a day of work.
I went to the coffee stand in the lobby and ordered two lattes and two pastries, since we hadn’t had time for breakfast. When James finally rounded the corner, I approached and silently handed him his coffee cup and pastry.
“Thank you,” he said, and again I was struck by how much everything had changed. Sure, we’d always been closer than the typical boss and assistant, but now it had multiplied significantly. Every word he said to me felt heavy with meaning, laden with feelings and needs and wants. At least for me. I still wasn’t entirely sure what he was thinking. I wanted to ask a million questions, but those would have to wait for now.
“It’s no problem,” I replied, spotting Paul walking our way.
“I thought Trev was the only person I knew crazy enough to go running in this weather,” he said, poking James in the shoulder.
James frowned at him, like he didn’t get what he was talking about. I loudly cleared my throat, and it seemed to jog his memory. “I, uh, just needed some exercise.”
“And you don’t think you’ll get enough with all the walking we’ll be doing today?” Paul questioned. “I swear you’re becoming a workout addict just like Trev.”
“You’re just jealous I’ve got bigger muscles,” James shot back.
Paul barked a laugh. “You are admittedly swole. I’ll never have biceps like yours.” He let out a dramatic sigh. “A boy can dream.”
“Okay, weirdo,” James chuckled, with mirth in his eyes.
I swooned a little. My mind went back to our moment in the lift, the way he’d looked at me. It was carnal. No man had ever looked at me so intensely. My skin still tingled at the memory.
“By the way,” Paul went on. “Do you remember Autumn Hayes?”
“The podcaster who came to interview you guys last season?” I said.
“Yes, the voluptuous one,” Paul answered with a private little grin. I wondered if he might have a bit of a thing for her. “She lives here in New York. I messaged her to let her know we were in town. She wants to know if she can take all of us out for dinner tonight.”
“That’s nice of her,” I said, glancing at James. His eyes seemed to heat every time I looked at him, and I was officially addicted.
“Yes, tell her that sounds great. See if she can come meet us here at the hotel around seven,” James said.
“Will do,” Paul replied.
“Right, well, we’d better get a move on,” I put in. “We have a packed schedule.”
James shot me a smile that warmed my chest. “Lead the way.”
***
We arrived back at the hotel around five o’clock. I hoped Autumn had picked a good restaurant for dinner, because I was absolutely starving. She messaged Paul to say we could go to her favourite club af
ter the meal. I was nervous because I hadn’t packed any suitable outfits, only comfortable work clothes.
I peered out the window of the hotel. Fifth Avenue was right around the corner, where I knew there were lots of clothing stores. Maybe I could splurge on a new outfit. After this morning, I wanted to impress James. I wanted to dress sexy for him.
Feeling yet another burst of spontaneity, I headed out, deciding to walk and take in a few sights along the way. Less than an hour later I was back at the hotel, checking out my dress in the mirror. I looked hot. I went to a shop called Anthropologie and chose a sleeveless little black dress that showed a lot more leg than I was used to. It had a high neckline, which made the amount of leg revealed slightly less risqué. I paired it with red high heels. They were definitely the prettiest shoes I’d ever owned. Mum might’ve described them as the sort of shoes a harlot would wear. I chuckled to myself. Even though they were open-minded for religious people, I was pretty sure my parents’ jaws would drop if they ever saw me dressed like this. Bennet’s definitely would. The thought of his disapproval gave me a tiny thrill of satisfaction.
I left my hair down, clipping one side back and experimented with dark, smoky-eye makeup. I hardly recognised myself by the time I was done. There was a knock on my door and a flutter went through me. I was anxious to see James’ reaction to how I looked.
“Wow, look at you!” Paul exclaimed when I opened the door.
James stayed quiet, his eyes running over me. He might as well have slid his hand down my bare spine for the way the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. I was hyperaware of every place his eyes went.
“I thought I’d dress up for my first ever night out in New York,” I said shyly, turning to grab my coat and handbag.
“Well, mission accomplished. Usually, you’re all off-duty nun. Tonight you’re a smoky-eyed sex kitten,” Paul went on with comic growl.